The bell rang before he could probe further.
I darted to my feet and Blake followed, grabbing my bag off the floor. “I’ll walk with you.”
Cody glanced from me to the paper and back up again. He was going to figure it out. I could see the recognition in his eyes. Maybe that’s why he made me unsteady. Maybe it had been there all along.
“Sure. Let’s go.” My ears were on fire. I wasn’t even going to get a full day of “real” high school before everyone knew I was Donnie Wyld’s daughter.
I
watched Skylar
run out the door and knew I was right. That’s why she looked so familiar. Her dad was a freaking rock star! And not just any superstar. My idol. A man whose music carried me through some of the darkest moments in my life.
I heard the faint mention of Skylar’s name.
“What?”
Chugger brow creased. “Blake. He has a thing for her. Sucks, you know. It’s like he has first dibs on all the hottest girls in school. First, Lindsay. Now, Skylar.”
“Yeah.” I couldn’t think about that now. I had to confirm what I already knew to be true. Donnie Wyld married Brianna Da Lange two decades ago, and they had a daughter. I pulled out my phone the minute we cleared Ms. Yarnell’s “no cell phone” cave and typed “Donnie Wyld’s daughter” into the search engine. The pictures were old, probably seven or eight years, but Skylar’s face was too special to duplicate.
The warning bell rang, but I didn’t care. Never before had I used my popularity to get something, but nothing could derail me now. For a moment, Skylar made me want more than my calculated existence. But it wasn’t her. It was the music. The heartbeat of Donnie Wyld that pulled me in like a drug.
I pushed though the glass doors to the main office, leaned my forearms on the counter, and began my best Blake impression.
“Hey, Steph.”
“C-Cody, um, hi.” Stephanie Moore looked like a modern day Snow White, and making her cheeks flush bright pink was as easy as pulling an A in Life Skills.
“That haircut looks great.”
She looked down at the desk and doodled on a sticky note. “Um, thanks. I-I really didn’t think it was noticeable.” It wasn’t, but most girls cut their hair often enough that the compliment always worked.
“So, I’ve been designated our group leader, and I need Skylar Da Lange’s phone number to set up a study group. She’d give it to me herself, but I won’t see her until after school. I really need to get this knocked out.” My mouth tilted and I winked. “Can you hook me up?”
Steph quickly glanced to her left and leaned back in her chair like she was trying to see into another room. “I’m not supposed to,” she whispered, but she still moved the mouse and clicked. “But since it’s you.”
It was odd to see the way she bit her lip and fumbled with the keyboard. Two years ago, she wouldn’t have known my first name.
“Blake was right about you. You are a sweetheart,” I said hoping she wouldn’t change her mind.
Her cheek color deepened. Steph spied the area around her one more time and quickly wrote down a number. “A-are you, um, nervous about, um, your first match?”
Yes. Terrified. “Nah. It’s all good. Are you coming to watch us?”
She lifted a shoulder and handed me the pink note. “Maybe.”
“You should.” I scanned the numbers and stuffed the paper in my pocket. “Thanks. I owe you one.”
She watched me with a dazzled stare. “S-sure Cody. Just don’t tell anyone.”
“You got it.” I left the office a victor, but felt like I needed a shower. Manipulating her was way too easy, and definitely another situation Matt wouldn’t approve of. I reminded myself I wouldn’t be this person forever. That one day I’d be free from the memories that still drifted through these halls.
B
y the end
of second period so many people had talked to me I couldn’t remember all their names. Amber, Kara, Erin, and someone with blue hair streaks and a nose ring. I desperately wanted to bond with other girls, but all they seemed to care about was Blake inviting me into the group during first period.
What did he say? What did he do? Were you totally shocked?
I leaned my head against my locker and closed my eyes. At least Cody hadn’t blown my secret. Maybe I’d misread him after all.
“Careful. It’s dangerous to sleep standing up.”
My eyes popped open as my locker neighbor shoved a notebook into her locker. Her face was covered by the open door, but she peeked around it. “I’m Zoe. You must be the new girl.”
“That obvious?”
She grinned. “Um, yeah. Don’t worry; I’m totally harmless. Not like the rest of these chicas.”
Wow, a whole sentence without Blake. I returned her smile. “Skylar. And I’m really glad.” Really, really glad.
Zoe shut her locker door, and I was able to see her in full length. Long dark hair hung to her waist; so black it appeared to have a blueish tint. Her oval-shaped eyes were dark as well. “I just moved here last year, so I totally get why this school has you freaked out.” She smiled and her eyes tilted up. “Where you headed to now?”
“AP English.”
Zoe brushed a long strand of hair off her shoulder. She was really pretty, but not in a conventional way. She looked ethnic, maybe Polynesian, but her style and makeup were
Cosmo Teen
all the way. “Ugh. I’m not taking any AP classes. Too much work. Everyone here is obsessed with dual credit and getting college hours, but I don’t see the rush, ya know? Why not spend five years in college? It’s supposed to be the best time of our lives, right?”
With each question, she looked up, waited for my nod and then continued. It fascinated me, the number of words she could string together in one sentence. The boys I knew never talked this much. I’d get a grunt and a nod if I was lucky.
“I don’t know what I want to do yet, anyway. My dad says I need to focus on math and science, but please, do I look like a math girl? My mom is a health nut, so she wants me to be a nutritionist, but again, do I look like I don’t eat cheeseburgers?”
“I think you look great.” The words tumbled out after I’d caught up with her speech, but I meant them. I was built like my mother, tall and rail thin, where as Zoe’s hips and chest curved like a 1950s pin-up model.
“What about you? Do you know what you want to major in?” She paused and waited. It was like the battery died in her vocal chords. The silence was strangely unnerving.
“Fashion design.”
A big smile cut across her face. “Sweet. Well, Ms. Skylar, runway extraordinaire, I’m gone. Look for me at lunch, okay?” She took off down the hall and talked to several more people she passed.
I pressed my hand to my cheeks and resisted jumping up and squealing. A girl. A friend. A teenager. Why did I wait so long to do this? Public school was exactly where I needed to be.
I
spotted Skylar
the minute she walked into the cafeteria. You’d never know from her stance she was the new girl. Head high, posture straight, she moved through the crowded tables like a queen among subjects. And from the number of heads that turned, most of the guys in the room would gladly bow down at her snake-skinned boots. Only they knew better because Blake had staked his claim with one push of an empty chair.
Something bounced off my forehead. “You’re staring.”
I looked down at the mangled fry on my tray and tossed it back to Chugger. “So what?”
“So, if Blake sees you he’s going to have a coronary. Just be less obvious.” Chugger glanced where my eyes had been moments ago. “Who’s she sitting with?”
“I don’t know, but I think I had Poli Sci with the dark-haired girl last year. Zoe or something like that. She talked constantly.”
Chugger spat out food when he laughed, reminding me why he’d kept his nickname all these years. “Oh, yeah. I had her in my Biology II class. I’m pretty sure she wanted some of this.” He pointed to his chest and bounced his eyebrows. “But Karrisa was also in our group and, wow, that girl gave the best private study sessions. Speaking of which, I need to call her again.”
My gaze traveled back to Skylar’s table. “You’re disgusting.”
“And proud of it.”
As if Skylar sensed me watching, she turned. Our eyes locked for one, two, three counts before I forced my attention back to my food.
Chugger leaned in and spoke in a hushed whisper. “Did you hear about Henry?”
My heart stuttered, but I kept my face relaxed. “Nah. What happened?”
“A couple of guys jumped him after second period. He was in the nurse’s office when I went by to get some Tylenol for the massive cramps in my legs. Stupid practice. But, yeah, he was in bad shape.”
“He say who did it?”
“No, of course not. His mouth is what got him into this mess to begin with. If you ask me, it’s all a test to see if he’s learned his lesson.”
Bile burned the back of my mouth as
Fatty James
floated across my ear like a whisper. “That’s sick.”
“Hey, I don’t make the rules. I just follow them. Henry should have too.” He jammed his fries in the ketchup and stuffed them in his mouth.
My appetite was gone. Shoved down with the words I couldn’t let out. I pushed away my tray desperately wishing Chugger would shut up.
“I bet Principal Rayburn schedules another one of those bullying rallies. What’s he had, like six of them in the last year? Dude needs to give it up. Nobody’s gonna talk about the list.”
“The list?” I shouldn’t ask. Every time I learned a new ritual, I was expected to participate. The last one left me half-naked and puking in the bathroom. My first and last Tequila morning.
Chugger shook his head and went back to talking with his mouth full. “I forget how out of the loop you are sometimes. It’s nothing. Besides, in this case, it’s probably good you can claim ignorance.”
“Why’s that?” I stiffened and searched between the lines of his words. “Do you know who attacked Henry?”
He leveled a stare. “I told you. I don’t know anything. Just like you.”
I sat back, but my nerves felt raw. I rubbed at my neck, trying to take the growing tension out of it. Skylar’s laughter floated across the loud space, and Chugger and I looked over at the same time.
Blake. Hand on her shoulder. Smile on his face. One of the girls shifted over, and he sat next to Skylar like they’d already had a first date.
“I’m out,” I said and stood to leave.
Chugger stood too and grabbed his tray. “Whatever you gotta do. Just get that girl out of your head before you do something stupid.” His warning lingered while he strolled over to Skylar’s table and sat opposite Blake. The way Zoe played with her hair and giggled confirmed Chugger wasn’t too far off base about her admiration.
I slammed my tray on the edge of the trash bin to empty it feeling restless and slightly wild.
It felt like a hundred years had passed by the time I pushed through the lunchroom doors. I needed to calm down. Needed to let this thing go and focus on what mattered. Winning state, getting a scholarship, and getting out of this four-year prison.
Yet, I wandered the halls in a daze. Memories drove me to places I hadn’t visited in years. Places where the ghost of Fatty James haunted me.
Skylar had only been here a few hours and already she had altered my world. And why? Because her dad sang about freedom and justice, and she defended Henry at our table?
Tom Baker’s face tore through my mind and ripped through the last of my calm. I fell back into the wall, sweat beading on my forehead. For two years I endured their wrath, praying it would stop, begging God, but it only escalated. That day in the locker room was the breaking point.
Tom’s girlfriend had been crying and sitting alone. I touched her back and offered her a tissue. She accepted it and then smiled. The kind of smile that came with tears and heartbreak.
That was it.
One moment of kindness. One moment of not being on guard. One moment that would change the rest of my life.
I wiped my forehead and searched for my center the way Matt had shown me. That nightmare needed to stay locked behind its see-through wall. The one that forced me to remember and stay on guard, but kept the pain at a distance. I wouldn’t go back to the past. Not now. Not ever.
When my eyes opened, I spotted Lindsay at her locker. The pull was strong, even from across the hall. In so many ways, we were the same. Weak. Maybe that’s why I’d always liked her more than the others. She always seemed to be pretending, too.
“Hey,” she said, approaching.
I pushed off the wall and met her halfway. “Hey.”
“I wanted to thank you for this morning. You know, in the parking lot.”
“It’s no big deal.”
“Yes, it is. No one else would have dared to interrupt him.” She rubbed the spot on her arm where he had been gripping her. “I guess you heard, huh?” She rolled her eyes. “Of course you have, the whole school’s heard.”
I felt like any answer would be the wrong one. “I’m sorry.”
She shrugged, but it was sad and not very convincing. “It’s fine. I chose this. I pushed him away. It’s just that sometimes things in theory are easier than things in reality.”
“He still loves you.” I knew that much was true, even if Skylar momentarily distracted him.
Lindsay gripped her notebook to her chest and tears pooled in her eyes. “Love isn’t always what it appears to be.” She ducked her head and turned, her pale hair swinging across her back as she rushed down the hall.
A part of me envied her choice—to walk away from Blake and all that he represented. I wondered how long she’d last before going back to him. Four years at this school, and I’d never seen anyone successfully take a stand.
Z
oe and I
had fifth period together. She was a gift. Like a Tiffany’s box with blue wrapping paper and a big white bow. We talked fashion and movies and made plans for a slumber party. She was beyond what I had hoped for.
“So, are we going to talk about the big glaring elephant between us or what?” Zoe’s whispered question sent my pulse into hyper speed. Did she recognize me? It’d only been five hours. I didn’t even get a whole day.