Shards of Us (22 page)

"Shoot him!" Marco shouts, louder this time, but I block him out.

This moment is just me and
Sebastian. Just me and him. This moment is all about revenge.

I don'
t dare take my eyes off of him. I focus on his every word, waiting for the signal.

"It only feels right, coming from you."
He's still staring at me, as if begging me not to do what he's know I'm going to do. I can tell he's stalling, trying to convince me not to, but my mind is already made up.

I'm going to do whatever it takes to be happy.

"SHOOT HIM!" Marco screams at my side. "Shoot him, my love! Shoot him or I will!"

My heart is pounding furiously and my mom keeps sobbing and my head keeps hurting, but I try to
push it all away, to just focus on this moment, on the trigger, on the feel of the gun in my hand. I block out everything but me and Sebastian, but what he did to me, but what he will do. And I click off the safety and press my finger to the trigger, and then I hold it there. "Any last words?" I whisper to Sebastian, eyes boring into his.

"DO IT NOW!"
Marco screams, his voice becoming increasingly desperate.

My whole body hurts, but it's all focused, finally in order. My finger twitches at the trigger, itching to pull it.

I keep my gun trained on Sebastian's forehead, just as Marco showed me.

I know what I have to do.

And I know the time is now.

"Yes,"
Sebastian whispers, and he sounds so defeated it hurts. "Just a few." He drops his gaze, his eyes burning into mine, and every part of my body is screaming at me at once, and I know this is it. This is the moment. "Don't do this," Sebastian whispers.

And then I fire.

Chapter Twenty-One

The shot rings out through the night, shattering the silence that was just there. It reverberates throughout my ears, the end-all of all of this, the final piece in Sebastian's grand plan.

And I've just completed it.

I keep my eyes trained on Sebastian the whole time, and he looks back at me, regret spreading across his features as soon as I pull the trigger.

Because
my gun is no longer trained on him. It's pointing at Marco, whose shirt is now pooling with blood where the gunshot went through, complete alarm all over his face. He stares at me, horrified, and I just shrug.

"Keep your friends close," I whisper into his ear as he sti
ffens up, then falls back, crumpling to the ground. "And your enemies closer."

Then, he collapses back, lifeless.

Sebastian forces a smile. "You did it, angel," he says, walking over toward me, but his voice is sad too, sad that it ended the way it did. Sad that it turned me into him. "You remembered the plan B I told you about."

I grin at him, launching myself at his warm, muscular body, letting him wrap his arms around me and hold me close. I breathe him in,
loving his familiar masculine scent, and the feel of his body against mine is too great to explain. Sebastian holds me here, and it is feels better than anything else could possibly feel.

"Of course," I whisper, and I feel his breath on my lips, hot and heavy and giving me tingles. I squirm as he holds me, his fingers touching my skin, moving up and down my sid
e. I can't wait to go back in the house with him, to let him inside of me again. "I could never forget your grand plan. And Marco fell for it, just as you said."

Sebastian kisses me,
but he seems almost reluctant. "You shouldn't have done that, angel. But at least we're safe again." And as he holds me there, I know that I need him. I need him to put me back together. And I need to do the same for him, like always.

My parents are
staring at us, horrified. "What is going on?" my mom asks, speechless. She's still shaking, but her crying has stopped, and disbelief has replaced it.

Sebastian
just shakes his head, continuing to smile at me, and then he turns to them. "I told her one night, that if anything ever went wrong, to befriend Marco and give me up in exchange for her freedom. But this stubborn brat decided to finish the job and kill him, all by herself. When she learned that I was hiding you two here, I think she knew this was the moment I meant."

I feel myself smiling.
All of the betrayal was real, of course. I hated Sebastian, for a little while. But I also know I love him too much to stay away. I know I'll do anything for us to be together--and that's exactly what I did.

Even though he didn't want it.

It saved us both.

He holds me close
now, his lips pressing against mine, and the hurt in my heart that has been there since I started living with Marco fades away, heals, just from his kiss.

Sebastian
would never hurt me.

Sebastian
would never disobey my trust.

I would never have left him after I learned that he was hiding my parents, if it hadn't been for that plan.

I would never leave Sebastian.

I kiss him harder and harder, loving the feel of his body against mine, his erection pressing against my inner thigh. But even in the victory, even in the silence of the night,
I freeze. I look past Sebastian, at my parents, at them, at all they did to me, and I realize then that there is still a hurt in my heart. There is still that same pain that has been bothering me since childhood.

And I am done with pain. I just want happiness. I just want
Sebastian.

"What's wrong
?" Sebastian whispers suddenly, feeling my body stiffen up, but I'm not looking at him anymore.

My gaze has shifted to my parents, who are still standing at the top of the staircase, free after all they did. Free and happy and not caring about the pain they caused me, the years of abandonment and neglect, the almost
killing
me.

And suddenly, I know there is one thing left to do for me to be truly happy.

"Kill them," I say quietly to Sebastian. The words slip out of my mouth before I can stop them, but they feel more right than anything I've ever said before.

Sebastian
stiffens up, lets me go. "What?" he asks. "Angel, what are you--"

"Kill them," I repeat, louder this time. I keep my gaze trained on my parents, who have started backing up against the wall.

Sebastian's fiery blue eyes burn into mine, and he grips me, searching my eyes to see whether or not I'm serious about this. "Angel, what are you talking about?" he whispers. "Kill them? They're your pare--"

"I said fucking kill them!" I say, choking out a sob
, letting all of the pain out that has been festering over the years. "They ruined my life, Sebastian! They abandoned me when I needed them most! They gave me life, and then they took everything for me. I almost
died
because of them! I sure as hell lost everything I cared about! Kill them, Sebastian. Just fucking kill them. Kill them so I can be happy again." I shove my gun into his hand. Tears pour out of my eyes and I just want to scream at the memories of my neglect, of the thought of being on that roof again, wanting to die, all because my parents abandoned me.

"Angel, are you sure?"
Sebastian whispers. "I'll do anything for you. You know that. But they're your parents. You don’t kill your parents, even if they ruined your life. You just don't."

My hand starts shaking now.
"I don't care!" I scream through the tears, because before I know what's happening, the rage has surged back. "I don't care whether it's wrong! I just want to be fucking happy for once in my life, Sebastian. Is that too much to ask? And I can't ever be happy with them"--I choke out another sob, staring at them both--"with them still in my life. Kill them, Sebastian. Just please, end this for me."

Sebastian
holds me tight, his muscle tensing as they wrap around my body, but he doesn't protest either. He holds me, just holds me, in the cold wind in the dead of the night, and his body warms every part of me.

"Okay," he breathes into my ear. "Anything for you, my angel."

Then, he pushes back and turns around, loading his gun and approaching my parents.

"Crystal!" Mom shrieks desperately as she sees what's happening.
The fear is palpable in her eyes, but I know longer even care. They're dead to me, even if they aren't quite dead yet. "Crystal, don't do this!" she shrieks. "Crystal, please!"

But I'm not listening. Or looking. I just start walking away, plugging my ears, even as I hear
Sebastian grunt as he pulls the trigger, even as the gunshot rips through the air, even as I hear them scream one final time.

The last shard of my past is ripped out of my side, and now I'm a new person, ready to take on the world.

Epilogue

10 years later

What am I supposed to say about me and
Sebastian? That we're married now? Because… we aren't. That we have tons of kids? Because… we don't. That we have tons of friends and family who love us, or will soon? Because… we just won't.

But that doesn't matter. Not really.
Being married with kids and a happy, perfect family is not who Sebastian and I are, or will ever be. We're criminals in love, and nothing is ever going to change that. Nothing is going to split us apart, either, however. Sebastian and I are meant to be together. We complete each other, heal each other in ways no one else can. He is mine and I am his, and with him is right where I want to be.

No more secrets.

No more lies.

It's j
ust Sebastian and me and our love for one another.

After that night,
Sebastian and I fled the country. We left for an isolated house in Maine, and we've lived there ever since. We've found a way to put back together the shards of what we once were. We ended everything, and now we've disappeared to the rest of the world, slipped between the cracks, gone where no one else can find us. We're living in hiding and have been for ten years now, but it's not like we're ever going to get caught. No one is going to find us here, if the police are even still looking for us. And we're together. Together, forever.

Sebastian
serves me a glass of wine as we sit at the small wooden table in the hut in Maine, smiling at one another. A few candles are positioned in the middle of the table, and a small fire burns in the corner of the room, making me feel so warm despite the snow falling outside.

"
I propose a toast," Sebastian says to me, deep blue eyes trained on mine. He's wearing a t-shirt and baggy shorts, his dark hair a disheveled mess of curls across his head from the sex we had earlier. He's so much more relaxed than he used to be, so much less angry. We have nothing to fear anymore. We have nothing to hide. We just have each other, and I couldn't have asked for anything else.

He keeps smiling at me--a small smile, but so real and strong and beautiful. He smiles with such genuine happiness, it makes my heart feel warm.
"A toast to ten years of living with you. And let me tell you, angel, they've been the best damn ten years of my life."

I raise my glass of red wine and clink it to his, grinning. A small radio is positioned in the corner of the room, and quiet melodies escape from it, mixing with the fire from the corner. Everything is so perfect here. So empty and cozy and just
… just painless. It's perfect, really. A life with the man I love. After so many years of suffering, I've finally found happiness.

"To the shards of the people we once were," I say, raising my glass again. "And to each other, for putting them back together."

"To our shards," Sebastian repeats, clinking his glass against mine. He takes a sip and smiles at me again. The reflections of the flames dance on his face, more carefree than ever, and as I sit there, I find myself staring at him, just staring at him, and sighing because my life has turned out more perfect than I could ever imagine.

To
Sebastian.

To love.

To happy endings, even in the gravest situations.

"I can
’t believe how lucky I am to have you," I whisper after a minute, meeting his gaze. His blue eyes burn into mine, but not so much in a fiery way anymore. If anything, his eyes are warm,
just
warm, and it feels so good to stare at him again.

"I think the same thing about you every single fucking day, angel," he breathes, reaching out
to touch his thumb to my bottom lip. I let him hold it there, as he looks at me and smiles harder, and then he reaches across the table and gives me a long, gentle kiss, so perfect I find myself not wanting it to end.

"I love you, angel," he whispers, moving his lips against mine, his rough skin brushing against the side of my face. "I love you so much."

"I love you too, Sebastian," I whisper, kissing him back gently, and I mean it more than I've ever meant anything in the world.

I love him.

And as I sit here, with the classical music playing somewhere in the corner of the room, with the wind and snow howling outside, with us, tucked away in our warm little hut, off in the middle of nowhere where no one can find us, I know I really, really do love him.

We kiss for a few minutes, and I just relax, loving the feel of his lips on mine, the warmth and the tingles his touch gives me. Everything else fades away when
Sebastian is kissing me, and nothing matters, nothing but him.

Finally, after a while, he pulls back. I breathe slowly,
not taking my eyes off of his. I know by the flicker of a smile across his lips as our eyes lock that this is just the beginning of the foreplay.

And I would rather have it no other way.

I reach out to kiss him some more, to press my lips to his, when suddenly something hits me. I stop, and then I frown at him.

"What's your
real name, Sebastian?" I say after a minute, curiosity getting the best of me. "I've never asked you before, and I realize it's the one thing about you I still don't know. But you can tell me now, right? You can trust me."

Sebastian
stops then, winces internally, but in a sweet kind of way. "Angel, trust me, it is as embarrassing as hell," he says, his eyes narrowing in that playful, challenge kind of way.

"Tell me," I say, smiling at him. "I'm sure it's not that bad."

He sighs and takes a sip of his wine, watching me closely. Then he says, "My name is Richard. Richard Passini." He winces as soon as he says it, a little blush creeping across his face.

I laugh
despite myself, because there is something truly amusing about a man as strong as Sebastian still mortified over a bad name, even since childhood. "That is a horrible name," I say to him, grinning. "No wonder you kept it a secret."

A sly smile flickers across his lips, and
he leans out and kisses me again, warm and soft. "I know, angel," he whispers. "I know."

THE END