Silver Bay Song (3 page)

“It gets pretty cold here in the winter,” I warned.

“It does in California too,” he stated.

“Is that where you are from?” I asked.

He smiled again, “No, I am from Kansas, but I live in LA.” He answered and lifted his juice to his lips. He sipped it and placed it back on the table. “I mean, lived in LA, I don’t anymore.”

“I have lived here my whole life,” I admitted. “It’s okay for a small town, at least I know everyone here, well, almost everyone.” I could feel my cheeks warm as I spoke.

“So, is this just you being neighborly or…?”

“Oh, yes, about earlier, I didn’t mean to snap, it’s a bad day. My uh, well, I lost someone a few years back and the anniversary is almost here, the flowers are from his parents.”

“So it was someone pretty special?” he questioned.

“My uh, my fiancé,” I nodded and sipped my juice quickly, the ice cubes hit my teeth. “He died in a road traffic accident.”

“I’m sorry, that must be pretty painful for you.” He furrowed his dark eyebrows together.

“We had a fight the night before it happened, stupid pre-wedding stuff and well, you never know that the last time you see someone is actually the last time you will ever see them, do you?”

“I guess not,” he sighed.

“Do you um, do you work?” I asked changing the subject.

“No, I am guessing you are a teacher though,” he grinned.

“Second grade,” I nodded. “What did you used to do?”

“Nothing much, I have rich parents.” He shrugged, but something told me he was lying. I drank about half of my juice and stood.

“I need to get back, my dog is going mad in there and I think it’s because she can hear me.”

“She barks all day when you are at work.” He said standing. “I am getting used to it though.”

“All I seem to do is apologise to you, Kaden.” I sighed.

“I don’t mind,” he smiled recklessly causing my face the warm again.

“I need to go,” I frowned and headed for the door hoping my blush would fade. “Thanks for the drink and taking in my flowers.”

“No problem, thanks for stopping by.” He said as he followed me to the door.

Once inside my house I closed the door and leaned against it heaving breaths of relief. What the hell was wrong with me, everything about him intrigued me more? I still thought he was an asshole, a very good looking, damn sexy asshole. I knew one thing for sure, I was in trouble.

Four

Kaden

Why was I being such a dick to this girl? She was pretty and I could see she was kind, but something about this thing eating me up inside kept my temper raging and she seemed to be the one I yelled at time and time again. I didn’t mean to do it, but I couldn’t help it and to be honest, her dog irritated the hell out of me.

I watched her for a few moments as she chased after the mutt, dressed in white shorts dotted with pink flowers and a pink tank to match, she certainly was a sight at that time of the day for any eyes. At first, like every day when I first woke up, it took me a few moments to focus and I was pretty pissed off considering it was my first night of alcohol free sleep in months. Even though I had bought beer, most of them remained untouched in the fridge.

I needed to get back in control of this thing, I owned it, it did not own me. I hurried down the steps of the deck onto the cool feeling sand and towards her as she frantically called after her dog. Then my mouth went in to ‘Dick Mode’ again and nothing I wanted to say came out. Well, except for her nice PJ’s. I insulted her dog again and I didn’t mean it, but I allowed my mouth to run and the more I tried to retract it, the worse it got. Resulting in her watching me march away after more or less telling her she was useless, what an idiot?

I gulped down my vitamin enriched protein shake and decided to give Yoga a try again. But it bored me, which is why I gave it up in the first place. Something Beth tried to get me in to. She liked to keep toned and swore to me that Yoga worked, I suppose it did, but there is nothing like a good, hard work out to make you feel like you have achieved something. I told my doctor about it and he advised that I take it easy, that vigorous exercise could advance my symptoms, Yoga would work on my muscles, toning them gently and I felt like a pussy doing it.

Now Karate, that was something I always enjoyed and began practicing a form. As I turned into another stance, thrusting my hand forward in a strike, I caught her watching me. Her curly auburn hair blowing softly in the breeze, wearing Capri pants and a lemon coloured shirt, she sure looked hot. As soon as she saw my eyes meet hers, she climbed into her car and drove away. At least she watched me, for a little while.

What the hell was I doing? I left Beth because I didn’t want her caring for me, so why should I give a shit about what an uptight teacher thought of me? It angered me more, but fuelled my training session, I knew that I would suffer later for it. Still, I punched and kicked my temper away.

After watching TV for some time I saw a delivery truck arrive, I stood at my door and watched as the guy knocked on her door.

“She’s out,” I called over, like it had anything to do with me.

“I’ll um, I’ll leave these on the porch then,” he said holding up a bunch of flowers.

“No,” I sighed. “I’ll give them to her.”

“Do you know Skylar Reynolds, sir?” he asked approaching my porch.

I nodded my head, “We have spoken only this morning, I’ll see that she gets them.”

“Okay, thanks,” he grinned and handed them to me. The scent shot up my nose reminding me of home. I took them inside and placed them on my draining board.

I didn’t mean to hover by the door, but found myself perched on the arm of the couch waiting for her to come home. Why? I have no idea, she didn’t like me and the feeling was mutual. I just didn’t want her to think I stole her delivery, yeah, that’s it. That’s what I told myself right up until my stomach flipped over as I saw her car coming down the street.

I lifted the flowers and took them outside, she lifted her shopping bag from the trunk of the car,

“Are you Skylar Reynolds?” I asked politely. Her back straightened and she turned to face me.

“Yes,” she frowned.

“These came for you,” I said as I held out the flowers. Taken aback momentarily she stared at them before taking them and saying thank you. “I’m Kaden, by the way.”

“Kaden, I’ve never heard of that name before,” she replied.

“Well, I suppose Skylar isn’t exactly a common name either.” I smiled slightly. She gazed into my eyes.
Did we just have a moment
? She agreed and muttered something about not knowing who would send her flowers, why the hell was I hanging on her every freaking word. “I would have thought it was your boyfriend,” I stated, fishing for a hint of information.

Her face hardened and her eyes glassed over before she said, “I don’t have a boyfriend,”
Bingo. Wait, she’s upset, shit
.
Way to go, dick head!
I didn’t hear anything else, I was too busy kicking my own ass for upsetting her again. We were never going to be friends, I was obviously too much of a jerk.

I meandered back inside after watching her hurry away, lay on my couch and closed my eyes, suddenly exhausted and totally pissed at myself.

It couldn’t have been that long, but a rattle on the door disturbed me, or had I dreamed it? I sat up and stood up too quickly, head rush. I staggered towards the door and of course she thought I was drunk, I looked it.

She agreed to come inside and we finally got to talk, she told me about her fiancé, Jay and the accident that had killed him. I filled with such regret for ever being so rude to her. She obviously had the dog for company and I more or less told her she couldn’t look after her only companion.

I wanted to tell her everything, about my life about who I really was and what was wrong with me. It wasn’t an excuse, but maybe if she knew why I was acting like a jerk to her, she’d understand and maybe we could be friends, I certainly could use a friend.

Who was I kidding though? She was hot, like, scorching hot and I found it hard to control myself around her. She noticed my tremor almost right away and then her eyes filled with pity. This was something I didn’t want, someone to worry about me. I made her feel uncomfortable; I must have because I wouldn’t tell her much about my life. She would have loved to hear about the fact that I travelled the world, played to thousands of fans night after night. I had an aftershave, a line of underwear and was in talks with Hollywood about a movie deal.
Was
, that’s the operative word, I
was
someone, I
was
famous and now I
was
a waste of air, a has been, a drunken loser who meant nothing to anyone.

I tried not to notice her rose colored cheeks, the glint in her eyes as she hurried passed me and left, running over to her house. I followed her with my eyes, okay, so at least we had a conversation without screaming at each other, she told me a little about herself and I was afraid that Miss. Reynolds would mean more to me than I could handle. She deserved better, better than anything I could give her.

I washed up our glasses and walked out onto the beach where I sat on the sand watching the waves. Why was I in this mess? I left Beth because I didn’t want her to find out the truth about me, now I couldn’t get this second grade teacher out of my head. Her smile, her auburn hair and her bright, blue eyes, all of it remained embedded and every time I closed my eyes, I saw only her.

No, no because she would complicate things and I needed a stress free six months to get through this, no casualties. I stood from the sand and hurried inside, I needed to get away from there, so I grabbed my car keys and hurried out to my car. Revving the engine, I skidded out on to the highway and headed towards town.

Stay healthy, the doctor told me, don’t drink, do not do any recreational drugs and cut back on fatty foods. Yeah, well, he wasn’t living with this, I was and all I wanted that afternoon was a greasy burger and fries, washed down with a chocolate malt milkshake.

Frankie’s was the only burger joint in town, there wasn’t a McDonalds or Burger King for miles. So Frankie’s it was and as I pulled open the door, that aroma of cooking steak made my mouth water.

I sat in a booth and waited for the waitress. An Asian woman approached dressed in a cotton candy colored uniform and smiled.

“I am Mae, I am your server for today, can I get you a drink?” she asked handing me a menu.

“Uh, I’d like some orange soda, if you have it?”

“We do, would like ice?”

“Yes, thank you,” I replied.

“I’ll get that right quick for you while you decide what you’d like.” She stated and hurried away. I gazed around as it seemed quiet for the time of day. When she returned with another she placed a glass of soda in front of me. “It’s quiet today,” I remarked.    

“It is most days since the plaza opened just outside of town, everybody wants to eat Subway and burgers that look like a truck drove over them.”

“That is a shame, that’s what I am hungry for, a nice, juicy burger.”

“Excellent,” she smiled at me warmly. “Our burgers come with fries, salad and onion rings.”

“I can’t wait,” I grinned and handed her the menu.

This was something I had never really done before, ate lunch alone. My mother would never have allowed me to eat a burger for lunch, junk food was forbidden in our house. But it didn’t stop me and my younger brother Drew, we went for junk food and fast food whenever we had the money to. We had an amazing relationship growing up and I guessed that over the years it had withered away. He didn’t like the idea of me joining a rock band, leaving them behind. He wanted me to stay and look after our mother. But I had my life to live and after finding out that I was as sick as my father was, I knew I made the right decision.

Drew made plans so that he was never home when I visited and since my mother married again and I wasn’t even invited to the wedding, I figured I was no longer considered as a member of the family. I didn’t need them or anyone else. Of course the alarming rate that my symptoms seemed to be progressing scared the shit out of me, the fear that my mobility and speech would rapidly deteriorate, judging by my father, I guessed that I had a couple of years, though I had no intention of trying to find out. I knew of sufferers that had coped the best they could and that was not for me, I would not sit around because it hurt too much to move or I had little or no control over my body. Suddenly, having the hots for my new neighbor didn’t seem so important anymore.

After my food, a huge mouth-watering burger and seasoned fries, I headed back to my house. On the way home I stopped for fruit and eggs, as apparently, protein is good for you, so I thought I would start the day with eggs. As I locked the door to my car I caught a glimpse of Skylar, she was sat on the sand watching the ocean. I guessed her life was lonely, but I couldn’t get involved. What would be the point of that? I was alone because I chose to be, because I refused to allow my pain to be burdened on anyone else, even if they are knock out gorgeous with an incredible smile, even though she is probably the most understanding person I had ever met, I could not and would not let her in.

I shut my car door and hurried inside. I took a long bath and then watched a movie before having an early night, sleep would stop me from thinking about her.

It didn’t work though, I got up and gazed out of the window, she was still sat there on the sand with her dog beside her, the breeze blowing through her hair, the moon reflecting on the ocean and the white sand looking blue under the starry night sky. Why would she be sat there? What could possibly be going on in her head to be spending hours just gazing at the ocean?

Dressed in the board shorts I used to sleep in, I stepped off my deck onto the cool sand enjoying the soft feel as it rushed between my toes. Silently I walked up to her, when I got there I could see she had a small flash light in her hand and was using it to light the pages of a book.

“Are you alright?” I asked her. She lifted her head and gazed at the ocean.

“Yes,” she shrugged.

“I thought that…well…, you have been out here a long time…”

“It’s a free beach; I can sit here all day and night if I want to.” She snapped.

“I know that, sorry I bothered you.”

“You didn’t bother me and please stop apologising. You pity me because of Jay, thanks, but I don’t need any more sympathy, he is gone and no amount of grieving will bring him back.” She retorted angrily.

“That being said though, I think anyone who loses a loved one is allowed as much time to grieve for them as they need.” She turned her head and looked at me. God, her eyes looked so beautiful that night, sparkling from the reflection of the lights from behind us. “Mind if I join you?” I asked. She seemed like she needed to talk.

“Like I said, it’s a free beach.” She shrugged again. I sat beside her and inhaled her amazing perfume. She had changed her clothes since that afternoon when she came into my house to talk. She was now wearing a white skirt and a darker tank. “Can’t you sleep?” she asked after a few silent moments.

“I have always had trouble sleeping,” I replied. “That’s why I nap during the day to catch up.”

“Have you spoken to a doctor about it?”