“Oh,
hey
,” he protested. “Don’t, sweet girl. Please don’t.”
“I’m fine. Don’t worry.”
“Can tell that just by looking.” His dry tone summoned a watery smile. “Shower?”
She became aware they were still on the kitchen floor on the pile of destroyed clothes. The kittens would need to eat soon, and she felt like she could, too. Once he’d stormed out, she hadn’t wanted much dinner. With his uncanny strength, he brought them both to their feet in one motion.
“Sounds good.”
CHAPTER 15
Monday was a
bitch. No wonder people hated them, Zeke thought. He wasn’t ready to return to the real world. He feared he couldn’t be part of
her
real world, only a shadow on its fringes. They had gone to bed together, but after the wildness in the kitchen, he had just been content to hold her.
Zeke didn’t wholly understand why she hadn’t left. He’d come to realize he didn’t always understand her motives, even though he could scent her moods. Now they were at the clinic, much to his regret.
Cleanup took all day.
At midday he ran out to Tom’s Diner because Neva wanted pie, and Armando’s only had cookies for dessert. While she took his carryout order, Emmylou didn’t flirt with him, which meant the whole town knew who he was sleeping with. The thought actually put a smile on his face.
After Emmylou handed him the plastic sack full of food, he turned and nearly smacked into his cousin Wil. He didn’t see Jeff, or his uncle Lew; Zeke felt grateful for small favors. Talking to them offered as much fun as a brick upside the head.
The other man looked like his dad, the same bitterness, only with Wil it came from frustration, not loss. “Guess you’re too good for us, now that you’re tapping that Harper ass. How is she, cuz? Does she like it hard and dirty?”
His hand lashed out, and his cousin hit the floor, before he had any idea he meant to attack. The beast in his head wanted Wil dead. Zeke planted a foot on his chest and wrestled with the urge to do worse. Everyone in the diner was staring; he could feel the eyes on him. Not even a whisper broke the stillness.
“Don’t talk about her,” he growled. “Mean it.”
With that he stepped over Wil and headed for the door. Rage washed over him in red waves. He wanted to go back and finish the job, beat Wil Noble into paste. But if he didn’t leave, someone would call the sheriff. He didn’t want to end the day in a holding cell. As he opened the door, conversation resumed.
“You think he’s crazy like his ma?” a man asked.
Mrs. Gillespie answered tartly, “You heard what Wil said about Ms. Harper. I wish more men demanded respect for their women like that.”
Huh.
He’d never have guessed the old biddy would defend him. She had seemed so shocked when she saw him and Neva in here eating dinner together. Of course, that had been before there was anything to it, at least on her part. He couldn’t remember a time when he hadn’t wanted her, though he’d learned to ignore the feeling and pretend it didn’t exist.
“That’s what you get when you run around with white trash,” someone else said. “People fighting over you in public.”
Vaguely shamed, Zeke let the door close behind him and strode toward the car. He swung into it and drove back to the clinic, still wrestling with his discomfort; he would probably never feel at ease behind the wheel. He hoped Neva wouldn’t get word about this. She had enough on her plate.
He hated seeing her sad, and she was, the entire time they were at the clinic. Getting rid of the broken glass wasn’t enough; they couldn’t reopen until she received all new supplies, including a new computer. He could tell she was worried. They ate lunch without talking much.
To make matters worse, Reed showed up, looking bewildered and sympathetic. “What the hell happened here? Is there anything I can do?”
Neva stopped what she was doing to talk to him. She stepped over the broken computer and met him at the front door. “Not really. It’s kind of you to ask.” Polite words, blank face.
But looking at them together, he couldn’t help but wonder if the other man had ever touched her. He imagined them together, Reed’s hands on her soft skin. A growl began low inside him.
“You’ve had a lot of trouble lately.” Reed frowned. “You might want to consider the possibility you have an enemy.”
She laughed. “Sure. Wait, I bet I know who’s behind all this. Connie Lacrosse hated me in fourth grade because Derek Jansen gave me his extra Twinkie. She does know how to hold a grudge.”
“What has to happen before you take this seriously?” Reed demanded.
That sobered her up fast. “I do. I just don’t need you in my business. Go help my father, why don’t you?”
“That’s actually why I came by.”
Zeke read her surprise. “What’s up?”
“He doesn’t want you to know, but he’s heading to Birmingham tomorrow to have some tests run. I thought maybe you might want to go see him.”
“What kind of tests?”
Reed shook his head. “I’ve said too much already. I really think you just need to go see him. If there’s nothing I can do, I guess I’ll get back to the mill.”
This guy had her family’s seal of approval; that bothered him more than he’d admit. Zeke watched until Reed left his territory, climbed into his overpriced car, and drove away. Then he turned to her.
“Need to go?”
She shook her head. “We’re going to dinner on Sunday. Even if it’s bad news, it’ll surely keep until then.”
He froze. Surely she couldn’t mean that like it sounded. “We?”
Now
she
seemed unsure. “Well . . . yeah. I want you to go. I’ll feel better if you’re there.”
Put that way, he couldn’t refuse, even though the idea made him ill. Zeke Noble, as a guest at the Harper dinner table? Her parents would eat him alive. But it didn’t matter what he felt; only what she did. If she needed him, he’d be there. It seemed so unlikely she could need him for anything.
“Sure,” he promised.
“I think we’ve done all we can today. Now we just have to wait for supplies.”
For the next few days, Neva saw emergency patients at the farm; people drove out there without complaint, and she also made a few farm calls. Julie proved herself a good friend, offering hugs and support instead of asking about her paycheck. She was taking a week’s unpaid vacation, so Neva didn’t have to fret about her, at least. Zeke was glad about that.
“Seriously, don’t worry about it,” Julie said, just before she left. “Travis makes good money.”
He knew it wasn’t that Julie didn’t want to help, only that Neva would feel compelled to pay her if she did. And it was going to be hard enough for her to rebound from this—he only wished he could do more.
That night, he tried not to obsess over the looming dinner with her parents. Sunday. Three days away. They were in the kitchen, cooking together, when he heard a car slowing as it approached his drive. She hadn’t noticed it yet, wouldn’t until it turned down and got about halfway to the house.
“You expecting a patient?” he asked.
She shook her head. “Why?”
“Company’s on the way.”
Neva went to the window and two minutes later, headlights appeared, as he’d predicted. She no longer showed any surprise. Instead dismay flashed on her face.
“That’s my mother’s car.”
Zeke swallowed a cuss word. “Guess she wants to see what you’re up to.”
“You think?” She offered a wry smile.
He let her get the door while he pulled the roast out of the oven. The house smelled delicious. Peeling back the foil revealed perfection. If her mother wasn’t here, he would be setting the table and calling her to join him, maybe kissing the nape of her neck as she sat down.
“Hello, Geneva.” The frosty tone reached him easily. Might have anyway, even if his hearing didn’t permit him to listen to the mice running around the barn.
“Mother.”
“I can’t believe you made me track you down like this.”
“Excuse me?”
“Ben told me he came to see you and you still haven’t visited your father. He left today.”
Tension laced her voice. “If this is another guilt trip to get me to come home, then can we please just skip it? I’ve had a long day.”
That did it. This was his house, and he wasn’t having anybody hassle her in his territory. He came into the doorway, and he leaned against the wall as if he didn’t know what was going on.
“Zeke Noble.” He didn’t extend a hand because Lillian Harper wasn’t like to exchange such courtesies with him anyway. “You staying for dinner?”
To his surprise, Neva’s mom swept him up and down with a thorough look. It was almost uncomfortable. “Aha. I see what’s keeping you busy these days. I heard the rumors, of course, but I didn’t know if they were accurate.”
Could that be a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth? Since her face had been worked on so much to preserve her beauty, she didn’t show much expression. So he couldn’t be sure. Neva seemed equally stunned.
“How long have the two of you been . . . involved?” Mrs. Harper asked. “Is he why you keep turning Ben down?”
Pain twisted Neva’s expression, mixed with embarrassment. “Not at first. Ben and me, it’s never going to happen. But yes, now Zeke would be why.”
God, how he loved hearing that—and she’d claimed him before her mother, of all people. He felt like he could do anything, as long as she believed in him.
“Can we talk on Sunday?” Neva asked tiredly.
“Of course. And I’m sure Ben understands that you need to sow some oats, darling. We all had our . . .” Lillian’s gaze raked him up and down once more. “Wild days. Before settling down. But my dear, one does not marry the help.”
Her words hit him like a fist in his stomach. Good enough to fuck. Not good enough for anything else. Maybe it was because he secretly shared her opinion, but nothing had hurt so much in a long time. Not since he’d come home, anyway. Pain had been a regular part of the experiments.
Mrs. Harper let herself out. She hadn’t ever spoken directly to him, as if he were too dumb to understand her words. And hell, maybe she was right. Fuck, he couldn’t even read, little better than a trained monkey. He felt sick at the idea Neva might be using him for sex too dirty to get anywhere else. She’d said she loved him once, but she never said it again. He was afraid to believe she meant it, because if she didn’t, if it had been a sex-fueled impulse, then he would die. Better not to ask about her feelings when he could barely manage his own.
“Zeke, no.” Neva ran to him and took his hands in hers. “She doesn’t know anything about me. Please, please don’t look like that.”
He sighed. “And you want me to go to dinner with you. Gonna be fun.”
“If Luke was here, everything would be better. You’d like him, I know it.” She laid her head on his chest and he put his arms around her, mostly because he didn’t know how
not
to. It was impossible for him to have her within arm’s length and not to touch her. But he didn’t let himself swell with the need that always wracked him when she was near. Not this time. “He always distracted Mom and Dad, kept them off my back. He didn’t mind being perfect so I didn’t have to be.”
“As far as you know.” As soon as the words were out, he regretted them.
Her stricken look cut him to the core, but it was too late; she’d worked it out. “I never once thought of that. He might’ve hated it just as much as I did, but he did it anyway. For
me
. Do you think that’s why he left?”
Desperate hope shone in her eyes. She wanted to believe her brother had simply had enough, run away and changed his name. That would be better than thinking he lay dead in an unmarked grave or had gone unclaimed in a city morgue somewhere.
Zeke shrugged. He couldn’t lie to her. Maybe somebody else could—and if she wanted that, she should go find him. He wasn’t that guy.
“Supper?” he asked, changing the subject instead.
Her shoulders slumped. She felt his distance and it hurt her, but he couldn’t help it. He needed to pull back some before he gave her everything. The past few nights, she’d slept alone in her bed, and he wasn’t sure enough to ask her to come to him. He’d decided she needed space. Fair enough, so did he. He didn’t know what to call what they were doing together. Zeke knew he wasn’t a catch; he wasn’t datable. Still, he couldn’t help hoping for happiness.
In town, on Monday, he’d bought condoms, expecting to need them. But she had been quiet and withdrawn after they got back from the clinic, and it seemed wrong to expect sex just because they’d fooled around a couple of times. So he’d put them in his dresser and tried to pretend they weren’t there.
Now he just felt raw from being hit by the truck Neva called her mother. He wanted to have supper, hold the kittens, and listen to music. And not feel anything at all.
“Yeah,” she said sadly, stepping away from him. “Let’s eat.”
She’d done something
wrong. Problem was, Neva didn’t know what, and she feared if she brought it up, they’d get into an if-you-don’t-know-then-I’m-not-telling-you type of discussion. Not that she thought Zeke would come out and say that. She suspected he’d just leave instead; he wasn’t much for talking. Sometimes she didn’t mind; other times, she found it frustrating.
Fortunately, she had work to keep her busy. Replacement supplies arrived, though she had to completely tap her meager savings to get everything she needed. Other stuff she ordered on credit with her suppliers. It would be a tight couple of months, but by Friday, she had the clinic open for business again.
People had put off their nonemergency pet-care needs while she sorted things out, but today, after realizing she was back in business, they buried her. A clinic forty-five minutes away offered the only alternative, and people didn’t want to spend half the day trying to get their dog vaccinated.