Slate (Breaking the Declan Brothers #2) (16 page)

“Yeah,” I gasp. Damn, he’s turning me on. “I remember.” I reach forward and do the same thing to his shirt that he just did to mine. I pull it over his head, drop it to the floor, and look him straight in the eyes. “I gotta be damn careful who I give my heart to.”

“Right,” he says with a curt bow. “Well, Rayna,” he runs his finger down my neck to between my heaving naked breasts, “when you gave me this,” he comes back up, drawing a heart on my chest, “I kept it, and that’s why your heart wasn’t in it with that guy in Manhattan. ‘Cause, babe,” he taps under my chin with his sturdy finger, forcing my eyes to his, “you didn’t have it to give. I’ve had it all this time, and I have no intentions of giving it back.”

“Yeah, well…” I lift my chin higher, taking in what he just said and trying to get through the mini heart attack from it. “You can have my heart, Slate Declan. It’s broken, anyway. You broke it.”

“No.” He shakes his head. “I hurt it, maybe even put a few nicks in it, but I didn’t break it.”

“Why are you doing this?”

“I told you, full force. I’m going to push you as far as I can, and if you fall, I will catch you. If you’re unsure, scared, or not ready, then with my arms wide open, I’ll wait for you.”

“Well, be prepared for some tired arms.” I try to snicker but fail horribly. “For I have no intention of falling into them.”

“Oh, my arms are going to tire, but it’s not going to be from waiting to catch you. It’ll be from holding myself over your beautiful body as I fuck you all through the night.”

Another gush of warm moisture disperses between my thighs. I squeeze my muscles tighter. “So, that is why you came here?”

“Yes,” he says without any denial. I’m learning real fast that there’s no beating around the bush with this new Slate. “You said that you wanted to help me. And tonight, I do need help; the kind that only you can give.”

I’m so tempted to put up a fight, but what the hell. I’m going to surrender. How can I not? I did tell him that I’d be here for him. I’ll break his heart later, after we have sex, or next week. Maybe I can do it when I leave. Yeah, that’s it. I’ll let him fall for me...Shit! I can’t do that! How did that even cross my mind? Oh God, please don’t let me fall in love with him again. I’ll fuck him. I can do it, just have sex. I need to get laid ‘cause it has been months. “Okay. If we’re going to do this, then I don’t want any boundaries, scars included,” I say, deciding to lay down some ground rules. “I want to touch all of you, every part of you.”

“How about,” he lifts my hand, placing it on my breast, “we start here, for this belongs to me.” His other hand slips between my thighs and he cups my pussy. “And this here,” he presses the tip of his cloth covered finger against the center of my moist heat, “is mine, too.”

Heart thumping wildly in my chest, I try to remain in control. Just sex. Just sex. “No, I thought we’d start right here.” I tip up on my toes and kiss his pliable lips. “Then, I’ll continue on to here.” I move my lips downward along his cheek, past his chin, to the soft, warm scars upon his neck.

“Why do you have to do that,” he says in a harsh tone as his hand moves from between my thighs.

I glance up and find his dark eyes. “I don’t have to, I want to.” I shift back. “I want every part of you. I want this part,” I place my palm on his scarred neck, “just as much as I want this part of you,” I place my other palm on the other side of his neck. “And if you can’t give all of yourself to me, then I can’t help you tonight.”

He glares down at me through the slits of his eyes. The muscles in his neck strain beneath my touch and I feel his pulse quicken.

And looking into his beautiful, guarded eyes, I realize it’s too late. I’m already falling for Slate Declan.

She’s fucking got me. There’s no way that I can walk away now.

After I had left Gathie’s so pissed off, I needed Rayna. I needed her to calm me down before I went back to Gath’s and stole her kid. Or worse, gave in to the addiction and got high with that heartless bitch while we listened to her kid cry. I struggled with both choices on my way over here.

Now, Rayna’s demanding all of me, and I know she’s not going to settle for anything less; the intense determination is gleaming in her green eyes. There’s no swaying her when she gets like this. I stare down at her, aware that I wouldn’t want her any other way. I like her gritty attributes; that shit always gets me hard.

I’m fucked, and I’m gonna have to give in a little here.

Then again, if I were ever going to let anyone touch my ugly, for some reason, I always felt that it could only be her. Not that I’d want to share that sordid part of me with her, but I know her touch would be absolute. It’d be real. It’d have meaning and mercy. And with her touch, my numb, scarred flesh—that shit might just learn to feel again.

Still, I stand here unable to move, afraid to submit to her demands, terrified to find out if she can save me.

To my relief, I don’t have to make the first move. Her hand glides from my scarred neck, gently cascading over my shoulder and down the length of my arm. With each gentle motion, she tears away my insecurities. My muscles relax as she takes my hand and pulls it up to her mouth, lightly pressing her pink lips to my blemished palm. With her eyes locked on mine, she places my tainted palm over her beautiful perfect tit. Her silky, hard nipple conforms to my leather-like flesh. All uncertainties wiped clean, with our flesh molded together, I stand complete and whole.

Sensing the release of my hang-ups, my primal instincts kick in and the blood in my body rushes to my cock.

“Fuck, you’re a pain in the ass.” I lift my hand, clamp it around her neck, and pull her down to my mouth. I’m starving for her. I kiss her, devouring her essence, consuming her lips and sampling her tongue. My other hand reaches around and I find her ass cheek, half still in her shorts, the other half exposed for the taking. I push my knee between her legs and yank her against my thigh. I squeeze her lush ass, and she eagerly rocks her hips.

“Yes.” I break from her mouth. “Rub your pussy all over me,” I growl as she grinds on my thigh. I slip my hand under her shorts, and I find her wetness. I catch the edge of her tight warm entrance and pull her open a little. She cries against my mouth. “Fuck, yeah.” I brush my finger along the inside of her velvety pussy. “Rub that clit against me. Fuck my thigh. Fuck it like your legs are spread nice and wide, like you’re riding my dick, babe.” Another cry tumbles from her, and I thrust my thigh upward harder into her pubic bone. Her hips start to gyrate. She grabs my shoulders and begins to buck on me. Fuck! My cock’s rock-hard. It’s pulsating. It wants in. “That’s my good girl. Do it faster, harder. Fuck, babe, do it until you come.” I lean forward and nip her on the neck. “Come for me.” I take another bite of her skin, sinking my finger just a little deeper into her. “And if you do that, then I’ll toss you on the bed and I’ll lick up every bit of your sweet pussy juices.”

“Christ, Slate, the things you say to me,” she says, digging her nails into my shoulders as she tosses her head back and screams with her orgasm.

I scoop her up and before she lets out her final squirm, I drop her on the bed. I tear her shorts off and dive between her legs. I want her coming again before she’s even finished getting through with the last one. “Damn.” I lick up her wet slit with my tongue. “Damn, babe, you taste so fucking good.” I nuzzle back in, feasting on her tangy, saccharine juices.

“Fuck me, Slate,” she whimpers, tugging on my head. “Please, baby.”

Hearing my strong little wild cat beg and succumb makes my balls fill with jism. “Not until you come again.” I smile, not that she can see it. I start licking, biting, and sucking her swollen clit. I know from the last time that she likes it, a lot. I do it until her hips thrust upward, until she’s writhing restlessly beneath me, until I hear the beautiful sound of her release.

I stand up at the side of the bed, strip off my jeans, and put on a condom. She’s watching me.

“You’re gorgeous,” she says, scanning my body while writhing impatiently on the bed. “And, damn, you’ve acquired some serious muscles in the past few years, too.”

“All I do is eat protein shit, work out, and until last week, I got high. That’s it.” I grin. She stares at me, I see her mind is working, and if I don’t make my next move, this conversation could take a turn I don’t want. “Now,” I kneel on the bed, “I’d like to pull you down to your knees so you can suck my dick.” I touch her bottom lip. “I’d like to play with your tits some more.” I pinch her nipple, and she arches with my tug. “I’d like to fuck every hole on your beautiful body with my fingers.” I tap her pussy. “But, I gotta get inside of here, babe,” I say, tapping the place I need to be again.

“I want you inside there, too,” she says, swaying her legs open.

Normally, I don’t do missionary. I don’t really like the chicks looking at me. But that’s not the case with Rayna, so I crawl on top of her. I want to look into her eyes and watch her face when I fuck her.

“Fuck, I need to feel your body against mine.” I wrap my arms around her and pull her closer. Eyes glossy and loving, she quietly gazes at me. “And I know why I need it, but I’m not going to deal with that shit tonight.” I kiss her before she thinks too much about what just slipped out of my mouth. “Tonight,” I look down at her, feeling my chest tighten and fill with her devoted affection, “I’m just going to remind you who you belong to.” I push my cock deep inside of her, and she grips my shoulders. “Tonight, you will remember,” I withdraw and thrust deeper inside, “that you are mine.”

“So…” A small smile touches her lips, her head shifts back, and she looks at me with sexy-fuck-me-now eyes. “Tonight you’re going to be my Superman, baby?”

“Oh, yeah.” I grin. “I’m gonna be your Superman.”

“Does that mean you’re going to be faster than a speeding bullet?” She laughs.

“I’m going to try real hard not to.” I chuckle. “But you’re not making things easy for me. Your pussy…” I pull my dick out and then push back in, liking the way her face intensifies with desire. “Fuck, babe, she’s so hot, so tight, and so fucking wet. She did want me inside of her, didn’t she?”

“Yes, Slate.” Her arms tighten around me. “At this moment, she belongs entirely to you.”

“Then I’m going to have to make this moment last for a very long time,” I say before I begin to hammer my cock into what belongs to me.

Proud of myself for lasting longer than I thought possible, after Rayna and I both find our joint release, I drop down on the bed. I pull her to my chest and silently hold her in my arms. Two weeks ago, I never dreamed that I’d be here. My dreams mostly consisted of fucked-up shit. Hell, if I were high right now, I’d think that I’d OD’d and somehow still made it into heaven. That’s what this feels like, heaven. I pull her closer to me.

But...this is real. Somehow, I’m getting a second chance, and I’m not going to fall back into my old ways and fuck this up.

Besides Rayna, there’s only one other thing on my mind, and surprisingly, it’s not drugs. I can’t get Gathie’s kid out of my head. It felt all kinds of wrong leaving the kid there with her piece of shit mom. I’m going to have to do something about that. Damn clarity. It reminds me of what a monster I’ve been for the past three years.

While I’m aware of the Twelve Steps, I don’t necessarily agree with having to do all of them to succeed. Some would say that’s arrogant or that I’m in denial, but it just ain’t for me. But that one, make amends to people you’ve hurt, I get that. I hurt Jax, Zeke, and Rayna—well, my addiction hasn’t really touched her, but I don’t ever want to give it the opportunity to. Gath’s kid, all those times I went there and ignored her cries, I hurt her. I gotta fix that.

I’ll ask Rayna what I should do about the kid. Rayna went to school for this sort of thing, and Gathie mentioned child protection was already moving in on her. Maybe, I can help to push things along. “Hey,” I nudge her.

She lifts her head and a feeble smile slides over her pretty lips. “I’m awake,” she says, but she really doesn’t look it.

“Tonight, I went to my dealer’s and—”

“You what!” She sits straight up, wide-awake now. “You went to your dealer’s?” She jumps out of the bed, grabbing the closest shirt that she finds. She pulls it over her head.

“You didn’t let me finish,” I say, not that my prior comment didn’t warrant concern. I probably should have started with something else.

“I don’t need you to finish,” she says, bending down to pick up my jeans off the floor. She tosses them at me. They fall on my legs. “I want you to leave!” She throws my shirt at me and I catch it. “Now!”

“But—”

“No!” She’s shaking. “No buts! I don’t want to hear it. Even if you didn’t get high, you still went there. You need to leave.” She points to the door.

Observing her struggle to stay strong and her heartbreaking fear, I completely understand. I’m an addict. I’m supposed to let people down. I’m supposed to relapse. And the people who care about me, they’re supposed to stay strong, and not let me bring them down with me. She’s doing what she has to, and I’m not going to be able to prove myself to her tonight. She’s too upset to let me explain.