After a while, the back of my
neck starts to hurt from the strap of my halter dress. I pull my hair to the side, and yank on the material.
“I can’t wait to get this dress off,” I groan, flipping over on my stomach.
Dean quietly chuckles beside me. “You stole my line again.”
“No!
Not like that! I, uh, meant the strap is uncomfortable on my neck.” I sigh, burying my face in my hands.
I feel him shift next to me. “Let me see,” he says.
He gently brushes strands of hair away from my neck, making me shiver in the process. My bare skin feels exposed and unbearably sensitive. His fingers lightly brush against the back of my neck, and suddenly the top part of my dress loosens.
“Dean!”
“What?” He’s kissing the back of my neck, and it feels soo good. “No one can see us, I promise you.”
I glance around nervously
. He’s right. Even if there were other boats nearby, we don’t have any lights on. I can only just make him out even from a few inches away. Well, um, okay. I rest my head in my arms and close my eyes as Dean’s hand glides up and down my back. I practically purr in contentment.
Now he’s trailing kisses on my skin. I keep my eyes closed as his hands
move down my sides, slowly peeling my dress off. The material catches at my hips, and he tugs gently. I lift them up, and he pulls it the rest of the way off.
“Turn over, Juliet,” Dean says huskily.
I obey, slowly rolling, but keeping myself propped up on my elbows. “Take your shirt off,” I order him back.
Keeping his eyes on me, he complies. I watch him, mesmerized. He pulls his shirt off, and my eyes
feast on all that smooth hard flesh. I reach out to run my fingers over his abs, and feel his muscles contract in response. He lowers himself over me, shifting one leg between mine.
Dean watches me intently as I squirm under his touch. He’s moving his thumb in slow
torturous circles over a sensitive part of my body. “You’re so beautiful,” he says softly.
“Dean.”
I’m practically panting. “That feels so good. Please…”
Please what? I don’t know. He’s slowly driving me insane with his hands. I think I’m going to explode when he starts kissing my breasts.
I groan in frustration when he abruptly pulls away.
“Look at me, Juliet.
I need you to tell me something.”
My eyes flutter o
pen. Breathing hard, Dean looks down at me with a fierce expression. I put my hand on his cheek, concerned. “What?”
He holds my gaze with his. “Tell me you want me. Only me.”
I can see the uncertainty in Dean’s face, and it makes my heart thump painfully. He’s still wondering if I have feelings for Johnny, and that’s totally my fault. How many times have I put Johnny’s feelings ahead of his? I have to fix this. I have to tell him.
“I want you. Just you,” I say emphatically. Then I take a deep breath. “Make love to me.”
“Juliet…”
“No.” I quickly shake my head before Dean can protest. “I know what you’re going to say, but you’re wrong. I’m ready. I don’t just want to—I need to.
Please.”
He gives me a brief searching look before he nods once. “I’m not going to ask you if you’re sure.”
He pushes off the bed, taking me with him. “But not here.”
I cling to Dean like a monkey as he walks over to the steps,
then slide off of him to go below. Excitement and nerves have my legs wobbling so bad, I’m afraid I’ll do a face plant down the steps. This is really happening!
Dean takes my hand and leads me to the cabin.
He senses my apprehension, and cups my face with both hands, just kissing me until every part of my body is warm and liquid with desire. When I wrap my arms around the back of his neck, he picks me up and places me on the bed.
I lie there, watching as he removes the last article of clothing from me. He takes a foil packet out of his back pocket before he takes off the rest of his clothes.
This is the first time I’ve been completely naked in front of him. I take a deep breath. I’m so ready for this. Dean moves, bracing himself over me so that his face is inches from mine.
“I love you,” he says
simply.
My breath hitches.
“I love you.” Then I laugh, because it’s so easy to say.
Hi
s answering smile is pure sex. Without breaking eye contact, he slowly begins to enter me.
It hurts at first…then it doesn’t.
Dean is so careful with me, letting my body adjust to his. His tensed muscles gleam with a sheen of sweat as he holds himself back. God, he is so beautiful everywhere. At some point, I stop thinking about the pain, and start to lose myself in the waves of sensation—until my whole being is focused entirely on this momentous thing that’s about to happen. I hold on tight to him, and let myself be carried away.
I would have been content to sleep in Dean’s arms all night, but he has other ideas. Good god. It’s not that it isn’t completely amazing—I just want to be able to walk the next day. On the other hand, I don’t think a girl has ever told Dean Youngblood no. Turns out, there’s a very good reason for that. Ahem.
He get
s me up at what feels like the crack of dawn. I fall asleep under the shower while he brushes his teeth. Hm, I’m not usually awake when Dean leaves my house in the morning. Getting ready together feels like such a couple thing to do. I think I could get used to this.
“
You look tired,” Dean says with a sexy little smirk when I step out of the shower.
I
wrap a towel around myself before I give him a sarcastic look. “That’s because my sex-crazed boyfriend woke me up several times last night.”
He just chuckles, low and dark, as I saunter into the room for my clothes.
Captain Dan and Finley are back, and have breakfast waiting for us on the deck. I shamelessly eat everything put in front of me. I’m still munching on a couple of bacon strips when Dean goes over to talk to Captain Dan. I wonder if he’ll notice if I take some bacon from his plate?
Finley sits next to me as I’m stealthily reaching a hand over. I startle and snatch my han
d back, looking guilty.
“Hungry this morning, huh?” he says with a knowing look that makes me scoot a couple of inches away from him.
“Must be the ocean air,” I say, forcing a polite smile to my face. This guy gives me the creeps.
Finley slowly runs his hands through his hair as his grin grows wider. “Or something else.” He leans an elbow on the table, turning his body to me. “
I just have to ask—how do you guys do it without him hurting you? Because you’re, like, so tiny. And he’s…well, he’s a big guy.”
I gape at him in disbelief, shocked that he would dare to me ask me such a question. “Excuse me?”
“Hey, relax.” The creep goes to pat my shoulder, but I jerk away from his touch. “I was just curious, you know?”
“Really?” I drop the bacon fisted i
n my hand, and glare at him. “Are we asking inappropriate questions now? Why are you dating a dude old enough to be your dad?”
Finley crosses his arms and smirks. “He buys me alcohol and shit. Your turn.
How does Dean not break you?”
I stare at him, totally creeped out
. “Go away.”
His laugh makes me want to buy a degreaser and pour
it all over his head. I watch him slink away, then I glance over at Dean. He’s still talking to the alcohol-buying Captain Dan, but he’s looking my way with a concerned expression. I give him a little wave so he doesn’t worry. I think I’ll just keep that totally inappropriate conversation to myself, since I don’t know how Dean will react. He’s not as cold and controlled as I once thought he was.
Dean drops me off at Tamara’s. I make sure to thank him for yesterday with a very thorough kiss. He responds by hauling me onto his lap. Once again, my back hits the steering wheel—but I barely notice this time.
“What are you going to do today?” I ask, self-consciously pulling away after a couple of minutes of intense kissing.
Dean gives a little shrug. “Work out some. I’ll probably head to L.A. for some car parts I need. What time will you be back from your dad’s?”
“Um, maybe around four or five?” I estimate. “Do you want to go over to Mack’s when I get back?”
He rests his forearms on the steering wheel, and gives me a sideways glance. “Not really. Come over to my house after.”
My heartbeat speeds up at his intent look
. “Why?” I ask teasingly. “Last night wasn’t enough?”
Dean’s grin is slo
w and mind-blowingly sexy. “I’ll never get enough of you.”
Both blushing and laughing, I reach in the back to grab my bag, and open the door, preparing to slide out.
“Hey,” he says softly. I stop to look at him questioningly. “Do you regret it?”
I pause for a second before giving him a shy smile. “Not at all. Do you?”
His gaze is suddenly solemn. “The only thing I regret is having to watch you walk away from me right now.”
Oh, wow. Must not jump Dean in Tamara’s driveway. Okay…I need to go…
Taking a steadying breath, I place one reluctant foot out of the car. “Text me later?”
“Count on it.”
God. Just look at him. How the hell am I suppose to walk away from that?
I am in so much trouble.
******
Chapter 47
“I didn’t drop it on the floor! If I had dropped it on the floor, I wouldn’t be eating it.”
I’m not sure why Michelle is accusing me of eating a dirty pot sticker right now—but I didn’t! I point my chopsticks at her and wave them around for emphasis.
She shrugs at me. “Whatever, dude. I saw you drop one, and when you sat back up after you got it, you mouth was full of something.”
I glare at her across the table. “I dropped my phone! I was already eating a pot sticker when I dropped it. Why are we even arguing about this?”
Michelle laughs, tucking a stray lock of hair behind an ear. “I don’t know. It’s funny to see you get all riled up. “Can I have the last Rangoon?”
Normally we fight for the last crab Rangoon at Lotus Garden, but not when Michelle’
s lost so much weight that she’s drowning in her pretty blue dress. She looks like a clothes hanger. I don’t tell her that, of course—or how worried I am about her. I’m just glad I convinced her to have a late lunch with me today.
“You can have the last one if I can have a bite of your sesame chicken,” I bargain, trying not to look concerned. “And not
just the weird chewy parts you don’t like.”
“Hm. Deal.” Michelle expertly uses her chopsticks to put the Rangoon on her plate. “So who are you expecting to hear from? You’ve been checking your phone, like, every minute.”
I automatically look down at my phone. “Nothing,” I deny quickly. “I mean no one.”
She narrows her eyes at me, studying me suspiciously. “You look happy. Really happy. What’s going on
with you?”
For some reason, I don’t want to tell her about Dean.
I’m not sure why. Maybe because once I start talking about him, I’ll gush, and be so sickeningly gooey and ecstatic—and…I don’t know. I can’t help but feel awkward and guilty for being so happy. I hate that I can’t act normally around her. I just don’t know what to say.
“I’m not happy,” I scoff, poking at the food on my plate. “I mean, I’m not happier than normal. I
’m—I missed you.”
Michelle’s face softens. She reaches over to pat my hand. “I know, sweet stuff. I’ve missed you, too. I know I haven’t been
very reachable lately. I just…I’m trying to get it together, you know?”
“Hey, don’t apologize,” I say quickly. “I totally understand. Whatever you need, I’m here for you. You know that, right?”
“Of course.” She gives me a watery smile. “And, hey, I never got to say thank you for that Heaven book you sent me—it really helped. And the little angel you made—it’s so beautiful. I have it on my desk at work.”
“I’m glad you liked it,” I say, relieved. “I was hoping it didn’t make you sad
.”
“No, no.” Michelle looks at
the food on her plate like it’s something that wants to bite her. She’s silent for a minute as she contemplates her fried rice. “I have to tell you something,” she says, looking up.
My skin instantly chills at the serious look on her face. “What?”
“Derek and I have decided to…we’re getting a divorce.”
I thought I had been braced for anything, but this…I am in total shock.
“A divorce? Why?”
My aunt sighs, but doesn’t look up. “For a lot of reasons. We’ve both thought a lot about this, okay? It’s not just an impulsive decision.”