Small Town Girl (15 page)

“Well, it is.”

“She likes dogs,” Kate said.

“She does.”

“You have paint spots all over your face.” She didn’t know why she said that. Maybe because she couldn’t take her eyes off the face those paint spots were on.

“I know, but I’ve been told I clean up pretty good.” His
finger was still under her chin. “You think if I can get the paint off, you might go for a walk with me later?”

“Where would we walk?”

“Back up to the moon if you want.”

“Lorena will want to go too.”

“She can show us the way.”

“Mike says I shouldn’t.” She wished the words back as soon as they were out of her mouth.

“Mike?” A shadow of a frown flashed over his face, but then was gone. “Big brother watching out for us.”

She didn’t say anything. She’d already said too much.

“Well, for you anyway.” His smile came back. “Okay, so we know what Mike says, but what do you say? A little stroll through Rosey Corner with Graham’s favorite girls. You want him to, I’ll talk him and Poe into coming too. That ought to be enough chaperones for you.”

“I don’t need a chaperone.”

“No,” he said as he ran the back of his fingers across her cheek before he dropped his hand away from her face. “No, you don’t. But maybe I do. So how about I come by your house around six?”

“Six sounds fine.” Her cheek tingled along the path his hand had touched on her face.

“Good. You bring the trumpets and I’ll bring the drums and we’ll have a parade the likes of which Rosey Corner has never seen.”

S
unday morning when Jay woke up to the sound of the old dog’s foot thumping the floor as he scratched at his ear, he was a little surprised to find himself still in Rosey Corner sleeping on Graham’s extra cot. Every plank of Mrs. Harrelson’s house had been painted at least twice, but Graham didn’t seem in any hurry for Jay to move on.

Jay wasn’t in any hurry to move on down the road either. Not while Kate Merritt was smiling his way, and she was. In spite of how Mike had warned her about him. Jay wanted to be mad about that. He didn’t know exactly what Mike had told her, but he could imagine. Stay away from Jay Tanner. He’s not the kind of guy you want to invite into your life. So what if he’d be willing to do anything for a friend. Loving him like a brother was one thing. Thinking about your sister keeping company with him was a whole different kettle of fish.

Mike did love him like a brother and that’s why Jay couldn’t really be too sore at him. Not even later that day when he hunted Jay up on Sunday afternoon to look him straight in the eye and tell him he wasn’t good enough for his new sister. Maybe not in those exact words, but the message was plain enough. One thing about Mike, he didn’t lack courage to do whatever he thought right, come what may. And he always knew what he thought was right.

That’s where Jay struggled. Knowing what was right enough to fight for. He could fight and had more times than he liked to remember. But he couldn’t remember very many of the reasons mattering. Instead it was some guy having too much to drink. A jealous boyfriend. A stupid dare. Or simply to prove he was tougher than the man standing in front of him, whoever that might be. His father. His uncle. A complete stranger. Mike.

He didn’t punch Mike in the nose when he said it would be better if Jay didn’t try to keep company with Kate. He curled his fist and thought about it, but Rosey Corner must have settled a peace blanket over him. Besides, nobody went around punching out preachers when they were telling the truth. Jay wasn’t good enough for Kate. He wasn’t good enough for any girl, because Mike was right. He had a failing. A spiritual lacking. Hadn’t his aunt told him so over and over? She’d said some were born with the mark of Cain, with no way to please the Lord or anybody else.

Back in their school days, Mike was always telling him how wrong his aunt was. He claimed the Lord didn’t keep score, that he thought every man was worthy of love. But now it was appearing as if Mike maybe had kept score and wasn’t all that sure about Jay after all.

“I don’t want to see Kate get hurt. She’s extra vulnerable right now,” Mike said. They were in the churchyard under a big old oak tree next to the graveyard. Mike had asked him to walk down to the church with him after he came knocking on Graham’s door.

“Why?” Jay asked. “Because she thinks she’s in love with you?”

Mike frowned. “What in the world are you talking about?”

“You saying you didn’t know that?” Jay leveled his eyes on Mike.

“She used to have a crush on me, but that was a long time
ago.” Mike waved his hand dismissing Jay’s words, but a stain of red settled across his cheekbones to tell Jay he did know. “I was talking about all that with Carl.”

“I think Carl is out of the picture now.” Jay leaned back against the rock fence that separated the graveyard from the churchyard and looked off down the road. “Actually it’s pretty plain that poor old Carl was never really in the picture. He just didn’t know it.”

“I didn’t ask you to walk down here to talk about Carl.” Mike hesitated a few seconds before adding, “Or me.”

Jay ran his hands over the rough surface of the rocks on top of the fence. They were cool in the deep shade under the tree. He fastened his eyes back on Mike’s face. “I get the feeling you’re wishing you hadn’t asked me to come stand up with you at your wedding.”

Again Mike hesitated. A hesitation that stabbed Jay.

“I didn’t say that.” Mike reached out and put his hand on Jay’s shoulder. “You’re my brother, Jay. You’ll always be my brother. But Kate, well, you have to know Kate to understand. She thinks she can fix everything. She might decide she can fix you.”

Jay breathed out a little laugh. “And we all know that’s not possible.”

“I didn’t say that either.” Mike gripped his shoulder and gave it a little shake before he pulled his hand away. “But the one who has to do the fixing is you. With the help of the Lord.”

“What is it you think needs fixing the most?” Jay picked a piece of moss off the rocks before he looked up at Mike. “About me.”

Mike grinned, trying to take a little of the tension out of the air between them. “You want me to make a list?”

“Might be helpful.” Jay pushed away from the fence. “Look, Mike, I like it here. Graham’s got some good stories.
Your new mother-in-law makes a great pie. I even like the sound of the hammer shaping iron when Mr. Merritt is working in his blacksmith shop, but I’m not going to stay around for long. Kate’s way ahead of you in holding me at arm’s length. You don’t have a thing to worry about.” Jay gave him a sideways smile. “Nothing but a new wife and a church full of people watching to see if you’re going to stub your toe and say something you shouldn’t.”

“That’s plenty to worry about.” Mike believed him if the relief flooding his face was any indication. “Why don’t you hang around down here with me? It’ll be church time again soon. I’ve been preaching through the book of Job on Sunday nights.”

Job. That’s all he needed. To hear about how God had let the devil knock down a man who was living right. The good Lord lifted Job back up, gave him back his good life. But Job had passed the test. Jay couldn’t get the first answer right.

Jay pushed a smile out on his face. “Job. Sounds interesting. Maybe I’ll come back down nearer to church time.”

They both knew he wouldn’t, but Mike pretended he might. “Great. I’ll bring you a piece of Nadine’s pie.”

Jay left his friend under the tree in the churchyard. He didn’t look back. He didn’t need to in order to know Mike would be standing there in the shade, his hands jammed down in his pockets, his head bent, maybe praying for Jay’s soul. What was it Mike had said about Kate? That she thought she could fix everything. Mike could have been talking about himself. But then, preachers were supposed to fix things. Keep church members on the straight and narrow. Keep them safe from the wolf in sheep’s clothing.

Jay walked back up the road toward the blacksmith shop with the words echoing in his head with every step.
Not good enough. Not good enough
.

He didn’t climb the steps up to Graham’s room. Instead
he got into his car and drove to Edgeville. It was Sunday, but a man who knew his way around, a man who wasn’t good enough for church people, a man like that could always find a drink or two to keep from thinking too much.

He didn’t go back to Graham’s that night. He slept in his car in the very spot where he’d pulled over to talk to Kate the week before. Mike was right. He wasn’t good enough, but that didn’t keep the girl from walking through his dreams, awake or asleep.

The moon was waning, and not quite as bright as it had been on Friday when they had made their parade through Rosey Corner. He’d pretended the drum rolls, and Kate had circled her hands against her lips to make a horn. The kid had grabbed a stick and marched out in front of them to lead the parade. He hadn’t expected to walk in the moonlight alone with Kate. She was good at keeping Birdie between them. He didn’t mind. It was enough being there with them. Feeling like he might belong.

They’d stopped at her Aunt Gertie’s house and sat on the porch awhile to visit with her and her husband, Wyatt. Gertie brought out sweet iced tea and cookies for them while they talked about books and baseball and cars and whether saving tinfoil gum wrappers could make a difference in the war overseas.

By the time they headed back to Kate’s house, it was going on ten o’clock, but the moon was casting a silvery light over everything. They were almost back to Kate’s house when the woman stepped out in front of them. Graham’s sister. Fern. It wasn’t the first time he’d felt her eyes on him. She stood back in the trees and watched them paint on Mrs. Harrelson’s house now and again. Graham said not to pay any attention to her, that she wasn’t a talker, but she did like looking things over.

There in the middle of Rosey Corner, she moved out of
the shadows into the moonlight, silent and stiff like a soldier guarding the path and ready to stop anyone who didn’t know the password.

When Birdie saw her, she squealed and ran to throw her arms around the somber woman’s waist. “Fern! You should have come and joined our parade earlier.”

“I saw you.” A trace of a smile slid across the woman’s face and disappeared again like a crawdad skittering between rocks in a creek. She was wearing bib overalls over a dark plaid shirt that blended in with the shadows. Untidy spikes of gray hair poked out from under a dark cap. She briefly touched the girl’s back before Birdie stepped away from her.

“It was fun, wasn’t it, Kate?” Birdie peered over her shoulder at her sister.

“It was,” Kate said, but some of the ease was gone from her voice. “But could be we looked kind of silly to anybody watching.”

“Nothing wrong with being silly. People been thinking I’m silly in the head since before you were born.” Fern shifted her eyes from the child to Kate. “Shouldn’t always be worrying about what others think. Can’t build any castles like that.”

“You’re right, Fern,” Kate said.

“Fern’s always right,” Birdie added with a giggle. “Aren’t you, Fern?”

“Right enough for somebody silly in the head.” The woman shifted her stare to Jay. “What about you? Brother says that woman’s house is finished. You leaving?”

Birdie and Kate both went suddenly still, almost as if they were holding their breaths to see how Jay was going to answer. “Not tonight,” he said easily.

The woman stepped closer to him. “Brother says your name is Jay. Like the bird. Mine’s Fern. Like the plant.”

“Hello, Fern.” For a minute he thought she might reach out her hand to shake his, but she didn’t. Instead she moved
another step closer. He didn’t back away from her as she squinted her eyes and stared at him, their faces only inches apart.

“You’re good-looking like him.”

“Him?” Jay asked.

Beside him, Kate started to answer, but without turning her head, Fern cut her off. “My question, not yours. Him. The one I wanted to marry.”

“But you didn’t.”

“How do you know? Brother tell you that?”

“No. I thought you sounded sad when you said it.”

“Marrying can make you sad too. Sometimes sadder than not marrying.” Fern made a noise that might have been a laugh. “But I don’t know if we’d have had that kind of sad. He died. Maia died with him.”

Jay glanced over at Kate, but she was watching Fern with wary eyes as she stepped up behind Birdie and put her arm around her. Jay hesitated, not sure he should ask any more questions.

The woman suddenly poked him in the chest with the point of her finger. “Go ahead and ask. You want to.”

“All right then.” Jay stood his ground even though the woman’s shoes were practically nudging against his toes. “Who’s Maia?”

“A girl who lived a long time ago and lost everything.” There was no doubt about the sadness laced through her voice this time.

“Fern, does Aunt Hattie know where you are?” Kate asked softly.

Fern made the noise that might have been a laugh again, but she didn’t look over at Kate. She kept her eyes straight on Jay’s face. “See. She thinks I’m silly in the head too, but she’s better than most. Me and her, we take care of the little girl.”

“I’m not little anymore,” Birdie spoke up.

“Little enough.” Fern glanced over at her. “Still need taking care of.” Then her eyes were boring into Jay again. “You remember that, Jay like the bird. Don’t you do nothing to hurt our little girl.” She poked Jay in the chest again. “You remember that.”

Jay finally stepped back from her. “Yes ma’am, Miss Fern like the plant. You don’t have to worry about me.”

She leaned forward and scowled first at him, then at Kate. “Hattie don’t worry about me. She understands freedom. Could be, someday you will too. If you ever break loose.”

“Break loose of what?” Kate asked.

“That question’s for you. Not me.” As quickly as she had stepped out of the shadows, she stepped back into them and disappeared.

“Bye, Fern,” Birdie called after her.

They stood silent for a moment where she’d left them, but Jay couldn’t hear her leaving. It was like she dissolved into the trees alongside the road.

“Welcome to midnight in Rosey Corner,” Kate said. He could tell she was smiling even before he looked over at her.

“It’s not midnight,” Birdie said. “Is it?”

“No.” Kate laughed. “But midnight’s when the spooks come out.”

“Fern’s not a spook,” Birdie said stoutly.

“Of course not. I shouldn’t have said that.” Kate leaned over and kissed the top of Birdie’s head.

“What should you have said?” Jay asked as they began walking again.

“That Lorena may be the only person in the whole world Fern loves and who loves her back.”