Someone to Love (16 page)

“These are for you,” he began, handing me a box of milk chocolates. “I thought I needed to find a plausible excuse to introduce myself here. Excuse me for not coming to greet you on your first day in hospital.”

I opened the box and ate one. I had skipped lunch and my stomach was rumbling. “You apologize a bit too often, you know?”

“You're not upset with me, right?”

“Come, let's go and talk somewhere else,” I murmured. The presence of Alberto made me uncomfortable. After that kiss, having him a few centimetres away from me made breathing difficult. I had always had a weakness for confident men. Yes, I really liked him. Alberto was a gift I was giving myself.

I crossed the office briskly, opened a glass door and let him through. “Alberto, meet Casper. He's my little helper.”

He opened his eyes wide, watching the dog resting in his cage. “And why did you choose him?”

I came closer. “It was Fiamma who convinced me that he was up for the job and he proved that he was. You had to see them, Alberto, it was something magical.”

Alberto reached through the bars and Casper came up, sniffing and licking him gently.

“It was for everyone, and in the department no one is talking about anything else.” Alberto took my hands in his. “You are very talented and I am a very lucky man,” he whispered.

I stood watching him. All the barriers I had built in my mind over time fell one after another. Up until a few months ago I would have wanted to distance myself from any relationship, but not now. I had another chance to be happy and I didn't intend to let it go.

“Then tell me,” I said, getting close to his neck.

“What?” he asked.

“Tell me you want me too, please.” Alberto's expression changed in an instant. He looked at me with interest, as if to detect changes in my face.

“When did you change your mind?”

“I never changed my mind, I only needed some time to understand…”

Alberto put his hand on my hip and with the other lifted my chin. I could smell the scent of his skin. I had missed him.

“If you don't feel ready…” he murmured, “Tell me to stop and I will.”

I reached my fingers out to stroke him, but he was faster and lifted me off the ground and sat me on the desk. I was conscious of my impudence. I put my legs around his waist, and squeezed him tightly. His pulse accelerated. He bit my lower lip. It was a strong and exciting feeling. A slow, sweet torture, until he moved his mouth on my neck, trying to bite me. I moved my head but Alberto came close again, trying to catch my skin. I pulled away abruptly.

“What's up?”

I had to tell him the truth and stop remaining entangled in that web of lies built up over time. Remaining anchored to the old road was the easiest solution, as always.

“Your stubble's tickling me,” I lied.

“I won't shave any more because I like the way you try to slip away,” he whispered. He opened his coat, kissed my shoulder and dropped his hand to slide it under the thin cotton of my top.

“Alberto, I won't ruin everything this time,” I said.

Our tongues touched, searching for each other and encircling each other firmly. I let him explore without any hesitation on my part and I offered myself to him without wavering. Why had I waited so long?

His eyes stared at me intensely. A faint smile lit up his face, I wouldn't have been able to stop myself even if I tried. He was about to pull my top off when a noise invaded our intimacy: brisk and decided footsteps were approaching, and I had only a split second to close my gown. Fiamma threw the door open and froze, her eyes widened. “Oh, sorry,” she said awkwardly. “Mia, there's someone looking for you…” she added, through gritted teeth.

“Who is it?” I muttered.

Fiamma grabbed me by the arm and, without being heard by Alberto, informed me that Diego was waiting for me at the entrance.

“Shit!” I exclaimed.

“Everything okay?” asked Alberto, standing behind us. “Yes, yes. I have to go back, maybe we'll talk about this on another occasion,” I concluded with a wink. “I'll lead you out.”

Alberto gave me a puzzled look, but said no more and followed us.

“Mia, what a pleasure to see you again,” cried Diego. He walked over and hugged me tightly. “You look flushed, very flushed. Are you okay?” his smile was curious.

From his tone I knew he was teasing me. Diego hadn't lost his sense of humour, but his appearance was different. With his unruly hair and a helmet under his arm, he looked like a scruffy teenager on a road trip.

“What—” I whispered, confused. “Yes, and don't think it's because of you. I was in the back visiting the dogs and it's not easy to keep them at bay,” I cut him short, ignoring the allusion.

“Hello, Doctor. I'm Maria, a friend of Diego's,” said an amazing brunette in high Jimmy Choo heels. Her gaze lingered on my uniform. Instinctively, I settled my hair with my hands, and thought they were quite clean. I was wearing a long white coat and a pair of safety shoes. Maria wrinkled her delicate nose and put a fake smile on her face.

I squeezed her hand. “Maria, it's really you?” I asked in mock surprise. “Diego told me a lot about you and I see that the appointment went well.”

That brief contact confirmed the first impression I had of her.

Her laugh sounded mocking, then her eyes moved over my shoulder. I whirled.

“I know,” interjected Alberto. “You can't have forgotten me.”

I just stared at him quizzically.

“Alberto? Is that you?” Maria came up and kissed him.

“You look fantastic.”

“You know each other?” I asked, incredulously.

“Yes, we have some friends in common,” said Alberto. “Yes, more or less,” confirmed Maria and giggled excitedly.

I didn't like the idea that the man who occupied my thoughts had dated that woman.

“Oh,” said Diego. “Ex-colleagues?” Trying to guess.

“Of course not. He… he is…” Maria looked around for Alberto's complicity.

“A neighbour, or at least we were until a few years ago.”

Maria nodded in approval. “Exactly.”

“What an incredible coincidence,” said Diego.

“Yeah, what a coincidence,” I muttered through gritted teeth. “And now, do you live far apart?”

I couldn't resist.

They both laughed.

“Not really. What a pity, I remember that among other things you were a very good cook.”

“Always generous with compliments,” downplayed Alberto. I wondered if they had also been lovers.

“And you are as modest as ever, your dinners were something else.”

Alberto brightened, enjoying the compliment. “In my opinion it was thanks to all that wine,” he said.

“Are you still mad at me for having signed you up for that cooking programme?”

Alberto and Maria were excluding us. Every nerve in my body was screaming in rage.

“Will anyone listen to me?” I raised my voice. “I find everything very interesting and I would like to write down a few recipes, but I should get back to work. Diego, the reason for your visit?”

“Yes, sorry, but I was hooked on this gripping conversation. I brought you the book you asked for.”

Diego pulled a book with a red cover from a bag and handed it to me. Why this sudden kindness?

I turned it round, on the back a post-it read: “For your evenings in the armchair.” Driven by curiosity, I raised it to be able to read the title and covered it instantly.

I squeezed a book called
Kamasutra
to my chest. I stood with a stony gaze.

I was incredulous. Good heavens, what was going through his head?

“So, was it that one or not? Are you happy?” insisted Diego.

“It was very generous of you to come all this way to bring it to me, very generous.”

“I did it with pleasure. You cared so much and you were so excited about the idea of reading it that I couldn't resist,” he laughed, and gave me a slight nudge.

I didn't appreciate the irony. The only thing I wanted to do was kick him out. “I'm grateful for all your trouble.” Proud of my self-control, I turned with an angelic smile.

“What book is that?” asked Alberto quickly.

“Nothing exciting, a dull story about a vet.”

“Really! The other day you begged me for it, and kept telling me that you needed it for your exercises. It will be more useful to you than to me.” Diego shot me a look, raising an eyebrow.

“I'm sure, I just hope I'll have time to read it…”

“Why don't we arrange a double date?” suggested Maria.

“No,” I replied in chorus with Diego, then added. “You're not serious?”

I hoped that at least Alberto would have the decency to refuse.

“Yeah,” confirmed Alberto. “I could prepare dinner at mine.” He smiled proudly.

I stared at him in disbelief. But what did I expect?

“What a fantastic idea! What do you think?” Again that sharp tone. That woman knew how to poison her words.

“If it's ok with Mia, it's ok with me.” Diego studied my face. Had he gone mad?

I was puzzled for a moment; this was the real Diego. I might as well make fun of him. “What can I say, let's do it then,” I muttered.

“Great!” enthused Maria. She waved a quick good-bye with her hand and said: “Then we'll speak soon, I can't wait.”

“Have a good evening.” Diego turned to follow Maria.

“Yes. Bye Bye!”

My smile faded instantly and I gathered all my strength to control the anger. I also bit my tongue to avoid saying mean things. I just kissed Alberto who smiled shyly before hurrying towards the door. That kiss was able to make me forget everything else.

I stood watching them.

“Mia, why the long face?” asked Fiamma.

I whirled around. “I don't want to talk about it.”

To Hell with everything.

*

“Ow!” I yelled at Spring, who had taken me off guard. Her teeth were small and sharp and penetrated easily into the skin.

“Everything okay?” asked Fiamma, entering the room. “I would say she's in perfect shape,” I said, clearing my throat as she approached. “There's been too many abandoned puppies lately. At least they had the decency to leave her in front of the police station,” she concluded, giving Spring a scratch under the chin.

She squirmed and rolled on her back, nipping at Fiamma's fingers.

“A client told me that she often sees a homeless man stop near Michele's workshop. She's sure he uses his small dog to beg,” she murmured.

“If there is no abuse, we can't help it,” I said through clenched teeth.

“That's the problem. The lady says that the dog is so thin you can count its bones,” she concluded, leaning against the wall.

“A big problem. I could take a quick trip to see…” I hesitated.

Fiamma looked worried. “What? And if he's a violent type and doesn't want you to see the dog?” she shook her head. “I'd rather you went with Diego.”

That was just what I wanted to avoid. I would have done it alone, after all, I'd taken a few lessons in self-defence: all you needed to do was to aim well and the job was done.

“Mia, please!” begged Fiamma.

“Don't worry. I'll go there at once and, if you don't see me within an hour, call for help!” I said jokingly.

“Yes, yes, I promise you,” she snapped, annoyed, giving me a pat on the arm.

“I have to run. See you later,” I said goodbye, kissing her on the cheek.

*

The area surrounding the workshop was full of young skate-boarders with faces covered in piercings and elderly people moaning about the bustle and the noise made by the workers.

I got out and looked in all directions, watched the corners of the streets, and at all the faces one by one. I was hoping to see him amongst those people and in the end I did, a little to the side, with a supermarket trolley filled to the brim with rubbish bags and covered by a dirty blue blanket. The vagrant was leaning against the wall, apparently asleep, and before him was a mat on which was an engraved aluminium cup with a few coins in it.

Despite the high temperature, he was wearing a brown woollen jacket and corduroy trousers. He was barefoot, snd his feet were dirty and covered with calluses. A pair of ruined shoes, with open soles, lay nearby. His filthy hair fell on his face and shoulders like small dark strings. He had a long and tangled beard which covered his lips.

I walked a few steps closer to search for the dog, but I couldn't see it. I was just about to leave when a whimper startled me.

A small dog emerged from behind the cart, tied to it with a rope round his neck. His fur was dirty and shaggy and you could clearly tell from his state of malnutrition that he hadn't eaten for days.

I looked around. How could it be that no one had noticed?

I bent down to examine him better. He tried to get closer to me, but the rope was too short. I had to do something. I took a step forward, but unintentionally stepped on a can and the homeless man woke up, cursing.

“Excuse me—” I ventured to say.

“You woke me up, have you got some change to apologize?” shouted the man, his voice thick with sleep and alcohol. He pointed to the cup in front of him.

I searched my pocket and dropped a few coins in the container.

The dog cocked his head slightly.

“Is that all?” he said scornfully. “Can't you see that there's two of us?” he scolded, pulling the rope towards him.

The dog closed his eyes, put his ears back and cowered fearfully at the sound of his voice.

“That's all I have, but I could help you more if you would entrust the dog to me in return.”

The man frowned and laughed. “What would you like to do? Take away my only source of income? No way!” he yelled, pushing the dog away with his hand.

“I can help you, you must believe me,” I tried to convince him.