Someone to Trust (14 page)

****

The trip with Lee to Atlanta was more than enjoyable. Lee had purchased a new saxophone CD and it filled the car with soft music as they passed the miles with conversation. They were not far into the trip, when Lee reached over and took her hand. Her fingers remained intertwined with his until they reached their destination. Occasionally, Lee would take his thumb and make soft circular motions on the inside of her palm. The touch of his rough thumb on her softer skin sent small shivers up her arm and down her spine. How could such a simple gesture give her that kind of reaction?

As they got closer to Atlanta, Lee shared some of the plans for the weekend with his mom. Megan joined in, and while quietly listing the things she was going to do, she slipped in, “I’m going to the cemetery to visit my father’s grave.”

Lee briefly took his eyes off the road, glancing at her in surprise. By her own previous admissions, she had not been to the cemetery since her father’s funeral.

“Does this mean you’ve finally forgiven him?” he inquired, gently.

“It means…with the Lord’s help, I’m trying,” she whispered, honestly.

Lee squeezed her small hand, asking, “Megan?”

She knew the question he wasn’t forming and simply whispered, “Yes.”

Yes, she had accepted the relationship God offered through His son Jesus. She had reconciled with her Heavenly Father.

Lee released a joyous and loud “Wahoo!” so startling Megan she nearly jumped out of her skin. His evident pleasure delighted her and she couldn’t help chuckling at his response. He joined her and they were both laughing when they crossed into Atlanta city limits.

Megan grew quiet as they crossed into the heart of the city. Atlanta held many shadows of her past. Shadows she had managed to avoid the last two years. Some of which she would face this weekend; others she hoped desperately to continue to avoid.

When they arrived at Helen McCormick’s home, her pleasure at seeing her daughter again was evident. When she greeted the twosome at the door, she threw her arms around her daughter, with a cry of joy, and held her close for several minutes.

Lee unobtrusively set the two overnight bags on the tiled foyer floor, while quietly observing the two women. It would be obvious to anyone they were very close and were related. With the exception of Helen’s darker hair, she was an older version of Megan and just as lovely. In fact, she looked more like Megan’s older sister, than her mother.

Releasing Megan, Helen turned to Lee with an extended hand. “I’m Helen McCormick, forgive me for being so rude. It’s been a few months since I’ve been to Laurel Ridge to see my girl.”

“No apology needed. I’m Lee Grainger.” Lee’s large hand swallowed Helen’s as he gave her a wide smile.

“I was going to make introductions, Mom, if you’d given me the chance,” Megan teased Helen.

“Lee, would you like to come in and have some tea? Or dessert perhaps?” Helen invited.

“Actually, I’d love to, but I’m afraid my mother is expecting me and she isn’t very patient,” he said, grinning to remove any insult to his mother.

“Oh, of course, you should never keep a mother waiting, you know.” She turned to Megan and said, “I’ll just carry these bags to your room, while you see Lee off.” With that, she departed, leaving Megan alone with Lee in the foyer.

“Thanks for allowing me to ride down with you.” Megan broke the silence.

“The pleasure was all mine. I enjoy spending time with you, Megan,” he said in a low voice, his heart quickening.

“Really?” she breathed, sounding almost as giddy as a schoolgirl.

“So much so that I’d like you to agree to go to dinner with me Sunday evening before we leave for home. If you have no other plans, that is?”

Without hesitation, she agreed, “I’d love it. What time?”

“I’ll pick you up here at 5:30. The place I want to take you is on the way out of Atlanta so we can just leave straight from there, if that’s okay with you?”

“Perfect,” she said, with an illuminating smile.

Lee inhaled deeply; when she smiled at him like that, he couldn’t think straight.

“Okay then, I’ll see you at 5:30 on Sunday afternoon. Meanwhile, enjoy your time with your mom.”

“You, too,” Megan responded.

Lee turned to go, but before he opened the door, he pivoted back toward Megan. Opening his arms wide, he didn’t have to say a word. She walked into his inviting arms and they closed tightly around her pulling her into his large frame. Heat radiated from him seeming to take on an energy that in turn coursed through her.

“I know it’s only for a couple of days, but I’m going to miss you,” he whispered into her hair.

She turned her face up toward him, her amber eyes glowing as she whispered huskily, “And I’m going to miss you.”

Lee’s eyes held hers in a magnetic stare for a few seconds before his head slowly descended and his mouth covered hers. Moments passed as his legs became unsteady and his mind fuzzy. Lee ended the kiss, cleared his throat and gently put her away from him.

“I’ve wanted to do that for a while,” he said, leaning forward and tenderly kissing her on the forehead. “I really do need to go now but I will be thinking about you.”

“Bye,” Megan whispered weakly.

It took every ounce of strength he had to turn and head out to his car. Everything inside him wanted to run back, capture her in his arms and kiss her again and again. He knew now wasn’t the time and didn’t want to threaten the progress they were making.

Oh
,
but I can wish.
He turned back to see her standing in the doorframe watching him as he settled in the car. As he drove away, he looked in the rearview mirror to see her still standing there.

****

When Megan walked into the kitchen, her mother took one look at her daughter’s face and released a knowing, “Oh my…”

Her comment was lost on a bemused Megan.

“What, Mom?”

“Never mind, dear; I’ve taken your suitcases up to your room. Let’s get your clothes unpacked.”

Later that night, mother and daughter sat up, catching up on lost time. They sat on Helen’s bed talking, much the same way they had since Megan was a little girl.

Megan shared her meeting with Nettie, her mother listening intently as she retold the details of the woman’s life. Helen’s eyes were glistening with unshed tears as Megan talked.

“She seems to be a remarkable lady,” Helen surmised, accurately. “I’d love to meet her.”

“She is and you will.”

“What about this young man of yours? Is he responsible for the change in you?”

“Partially, but he’s not really
my
young man,” Megan answered, truthfully.

“Anyone watching the way he looks at you would disagree,” Helen contradicted.

Megan wanted to explain to her mother what, or more accurately
who,
was responsible for the change in her. She wanted to tell her about the truth she’d discovered but she simply didn’t know how. Her mother had not attended church since Ray abandoned them, feeling pretty much the same way about God as Megan had.

Megan snapped back to attention when her mother said, “Well, judging by the way Lee Grainger looked at you, it’s only a matter of time until he is
your
young man.”

“Mom!” Megan’s cheeks flushed with warmth.

“Honey, it is so good to see you relaxed, without that tense haunted look in your eyes. I haven’t seen you this way since…” She broke off in midstream.

Megan was suddenly filled with shame. She’d never been able to tell her mother the reason behind the tense, haunted look.
Trevor Raines
. How could she? Her mother would have been so disappointed in her. Yet, it had been very difficult to keep the secret, especially since it was the first, and only, thing she had kept from her mother, adding to the guilt she carried.

All Helen knew was Megan’s relationship with Trevor ceased abruptly. Though her anguish was apparent, Megan never offered her mother an explanation. Respecting her daughter’s privacy, Helen did not pry.

After a few moments of silence with each woman lost in her own thoughts, Megan redirected the conversation, learning some interesting details about her mother’s life. As Helen spoke, Megan detected the same lilt as she had heard on recent phone conversations.

To Megan’s surprise, she discovered her mother, who had rarely dated a man after Ray’s death, was dating a gentleman five years her senior. She and Ben Cartier had been seeing one another exclusively for the last six months.

“Ben’s wife died three years ago,” Helen explained. “I met him through a mutual friend who had recommended me as an honest and knowledgeable real estate agent when Ben decided to buy a smaller home.”

Her mother paused for a few moments as if weighing what she wanted to say. “We liked each other immediately and continued enjoying one another’s company long after all real estate transactions were complete. I hesitated telling you about Ben in the beginning, because I believed it was a temporary situation.”

“And now?” Megan questioned gently.

“I believe we’ve moved beyond mere friendship into something more serious,” Helen admitted. Helen’s face was fairly glowing as she spoke of Ben. Her feelings for him were written clearly on her face.

“Oh my…” Megan repeated the words her mother used on her earlier.

Helen gave her daughter a confused look, which then turned to surprise before changing to revelation. Finding the situation humorous, they broke into chuckles, which soon erupted into laughter. Mother and daughter collapsed in a heap on the bed, like a couple of teens having a pajama party. They continued lying there until the wee hours of the morning, talking.

When Megan asked Helen when she would be able to meet Ben, her mother smiled, answering nonchalantly, “When he picks the two of us up for church Sunday morning.”

Megan could not hide the elation she felt at that small bit of news. As usual, her mother read her well, but teasingly asked, “Are you happy about meeting Ben or the fact I’m attending church?”

“Don’t get me wrong, Mom, I’m happy to meet the man who seems to be bringing you so much happiness, but honestly, I
am
thrilled you’re going to church.”

“Well, I’ve been attending with Ben for some time now. He seems to think it may help me finally let go of the past.”

Megan leaned toward her mom, grasping both of her hands and staring intently in her eyes. “God is helping me to do that very thing, Mom.”

With that, Megan was able to share her experiences over the past couple of weeks. Helen listened carefully, neither commenting positively or negatively. The fact she listened at all gave Megan hope that her mom would find the same peace she had.

****

The next morning, as Megan applied a small amount of gloss to her lips, she smiled into the mirror. Pausing, she whispered, “Thank you, Heavenly Father, for caring for us even when I did not believe You did. Forgive me, for not trusting You.”

With each passing day, it was becoming more apparent to Megan that though her earthly father had left them, her Heavenly Father certainly had not.

Helen and Megan’s day together passed all too quickly. After a late breakfast, they’d gone shopping. Not living near a mall in Laurel Ridge, it had been quite some time since Megan had an excursion in one, so she took full advantage of it. The McCormick women spent the entire day laughing and talking as they tried on clothes and shoes, and then while they tested new perfumes and make-ups.

Megan didn’t realize just how much she missed her mother and told her as much, as they walked side-by-side to the car. Helen stopped midstride and turned toward her.

“And I’ve missed my little girl. I don’t know if I’ve told you often enough, but I am very proud of you. You have grown into a lovely, independent, smart and compassionate woman.”

Megan gave her mom a quick hug. “Thanks, Mom, but I owe that to you. You did a wonderful job raising me alone and I’m proud of you as well.”

“Thank you, sweetie, but I’m beginning to believe I wasn’t really
alone.”

Moments later, as they were pulling out of the mall parking lot, Megan found the courage to share what had been on her heart since leaving Laurel Ridge.

“Mom, I’d like to go by the cemetery to Dad’s grave.” She felt her mother tense and proceeded with caution. “If you don’t feel as if you can go with me, it’s okay; I can borrow the car and go on my own.”

Helen lost all color in her face but responded in a voice that was barely above a whisper, “No. I’ll take you.” With that they drove on in silence, each lost in thoughts of their own.

When they arrived at the cemetery, they had to park and walk, doing this also in silence. Helen led the way, as Megan could not remember exactly where the gravesite was. Megan could read the tenseness in her mother by the very erect way she was carrying herself. As usual, Helen put her own feelings aside and dropped back to allow Megan to match her pace. She reached down and took Megan’s hand in her own, offering her silent support.

Megan needed it; she was feeling pretty tense as well. Her stomach was in knots, her palms were sweaty and she could feel her heart racing in her chest. She had not been to the cemetery since the day her father was buried. As she walked with her mother toward the grave, Megan felt as if she were that little girl again, the child who’d just lost her daddy and was approaching the unthinkable.

Helen stopped suddenly. She pointed fifty feet ahead to a small stone-fenced area, with the name McCormick on it. Her hand was shaking.

“It’s over there, honey. I’m going to let you go on alone, but I’ll be waiting right here.” Her voice constricted with emotion.

“It’s okay, Mom,” Megan assured her. “I understand.”

And she did. She knew the simple act of bringing her here had taken a lot. She would not have the strength to be doing this, if it were not for God.

Megan walked gingerly through the columns of the fenced area, marking the beginning of the McCormick family plots. It held three graves. Two belonged to the grandparents she never knew since they passed away before she was born. The other was her father’s, Raymond Harrison McCormick.

She leaned down, gently tracing her father’s name, the letters etched in the cold slab of stone that marked where he was buried.

A tide of memories swept over her. This time they did not drown her. For so long, the only memories she allowed were those of his betrayal, but now buried memories began to surface. These were the memories which would not allow her to hang on to anger.

These memories were filled with images of the two of them sitting on the back lanai by the pool, racing to see who could finish their ice cream cone first before diving into the water. Another was of her snuggled warmly under the covers, while her father sat on the edge of the bed reading her favorite bedtime story; and of him, patiently, teaching her to ride her bright pink bicycle for the first time without training wheels and then cheering very loudly when she finally did it. Those were the memories she needed to hang onto.

Tears streamed unchecked down her cheeks. “I miss you, Daddy—I miss you so much. I don’t understand why you left Mom and me. I don’t understand how you could do that to us, but…I forgive you.” She was crying harder now. “I forgive you, Daddy, and…I love you.”

Megan did not even realize she had fallen to her knees beside the grave, but that’s where she was, sobs racking her slender frame. She felt her mother’s arms go around her, and like so many years ago, Helen’s tears mingled with her daughter’s.