Something About Joe (14 page)

His words
were like a blow, taking her breath away from her. “Are you trying
to tell me something?” She didn’t give him a chance to answer.
“Like, ‘don’t get any ideas about me’?”

H
er fantasies in the kitchen
churned inside to the point of nausea.
Stay-at-home dad.
Walking down the aisle.
And now
he was warning her off. The humiliation was unbearable. She thought
she might be sick. Thank heaven she’d stopped him from going any
further.

Imagine how
she’d feel if she was hearing this
after
she’d gone to bed with
him.

She’d long
ago figured out she’d been attracted to Peter because he was the
same kind of controlling, distant person as her adoptive father.
She’d had no more luck winning her husband’s approval than she had
her father’s.

They said
you kept on falling for the same kind of man. Joe seemed
different—but maybe he wasn’t.

She’d
started spinning dreams and fantasies around a man who might treat
Mitchell the same way she’d been treated by her father. Her beloved
son would never,
ever
, have to put up with
that.

Even if she remained single to the
grave.

Joe put his
hands on her shoulders. She tried to shrug them off but he wouldn’t
let go. His hands were warm and firm and she remembered how good
they had felt on her body. How much she had wanted him.

She stifled
a sob. Oh Joe, she cried silently, thinking of what might have
been. He was so close she could feel his breath on her face as he
spoke, smell the spicy maleness she already identified as uniquely
his. Her traitorous body ached for him.

“
Allison,
listen. I don’t want to hurt you. Or Mitchell.”

Now he was
patroniz
ing her. She couldn’t bear
it.

She shrugged out of his arms.

“What makes you think you’ve got the power
to hurt me?” she asked, her voice breaking.

If she hadn’t known better she’d think her
words had wounded him. But the tight look was gone from his face as
soon as it had flashed there.

She forced
herself to sound cynically blasé. “You don’t think tonight meant
anything to me do you? What’s a few kisses? I wasn’t expecting it.
Neither were you, I guess. Unless you try to lay all the mothers
you work for.”

Joe’s hands
were clenched into fists by his side, as if he were trying to
control his anger. Before she knew what was happening, he had
pulled her close again.

She
struggled, protested, mumbled against the pressure of his lips. But
her body betrayed her, her nipples tingling into hardness, her body
flooded with desire. With a little moan, her mouth opened under his
and her tongue welcomed his into her mouth.

She pressed
her breasts against his chest, her hips against the hardness of his
arousal; she twined her arms around his neck, reveling in the
closeness of him. She wanted him so badly she felt almost faint.
For a moment she gave herself over to the utter pleasure his
embrace gave her.

Then
s
he wrenched his arms from around her and
twisted herself free. She was furious with herself that she’d let
him feel her response.

Her chin
thrust skyward. “So we’re attracted to each other. It’s nothing
more than lust.”

“You feel this kind of hunger for a man all
the time?”

Allison
blushed and couldn’t look
at him. “That’s none of your business.”

She’d never felt it. Not for any one but
him. Ever.

“
I’m not
that guy who tries to seduce every woman I work for,” he
growled.

In spite of herself her heart sang at his
words. Only to be silenced by his next.

“
But I’m not
looking for commitment—”

“
O
r another man’s child,” she
finished for him, her words dull and flat.

She sniffed
back tears and tried to keep the betraying tremor from her voice.
Then she met Joe’s gaze squarely. “Mitchell and I come as a package
deal,” she said. “That’s not negotiable.”

“
I
understand
, and I admire you for it,”
said Joe slowly.

Allison
nearly buckled at the stab of pain his words brought her. He
admired her but he didn’t want her—not when she came encumbered
with a child.

Joe
continued. “Mitchell’s a lucky little boy to have such a great
mom.”

“
I’m glad
you think so,” Allison managed to force out through dry
lips.

“I do,” he said and made to reach for her
again.

Allison
stepped back. She couldn’t trust herself if he were to touch her
again. In spite of the pain he was causing her, she knew her body
would betray her.

“
I think
it’s time we said goodnight. And...and goodbye. It’s not a good
idea to see each other again.”

“You mean—”

“
I know we
agreed
you’d carry on as Mitchell’s nanny
for the entire week, but I don’t think I could bear it. Not after
tonight.”

Joe’s brows
drew together and his face was shadowed with sadness. “I wish it
could be different.”

“
It can’t be
any different,” she said, desperately willing away the tears. “I
have to think of Mitchell, not just myself.”

“Will you get another nanny?”

Allison
hadn’t thought that far ahead. But suddenly she knew what to do.
“Yes, but in the meantime I’ll look after him myself. I’ll take
some vacation days. Clive can’t complain—the deal’s done, the
contract’s signed.”

“I’ll miss Mitchell,” said Joe, surprising
her.

Allison
couldn’t bear much more of this. She just wanted Joe to go
quickly—a short, sharp pain like ripping off an adhesive bandage,
not the prolonged agony of slowly teasing it off. “He’ll miss you,
too,” she said, not daring to think how she herself would feel when
Joe was gone.

“I should say goodbye to him. He’ll wonder
what’s happened to me.”

“He’s asleep. I’ll say goodbye for you.”

“I’ll look in on him,” insisted Joe. “He’ll
be upset if I don’t say goodbye.”

“
No!”
H
er voice broke. “You’re just a
short-term, nanny, Joe. In a week’s time Mitchell won’t even
remember you. Please...please just go.”

CHAPTER SEVEN

Allison
was amazed at the
sight—and sound—of hundreds of toddlers punching their little arms
in the air above their heads, rhythmically stamping their feet, and
shouting, “Teddies! Teddies!” as they waited for the kids’ band,
Teddy Bear Beat, to come on stage. Just like adults at a rock
concert, only half these fans were wearing diapers.

Teddy Bear
Beat
was the hot new band with the
pre-school set. Allison’s neighbor Diane had told her so when her
kids came down with chicken pox and she’d offered tickets to
Allison and Mitchell. Diane had been surprised when Allison had
confessed she’d never heard of the band or their best-selling
CD
Fall Down
Teddy
.

She’d jumped
at the chance to bring Mitchell to the concert, enjoying her time
with him between nannies. Out of the blue, her former nanny Katie
had arrived back in the country, disillusioned with backpacking,
and was starting back in her old job the following week.

Sitting on
the floor toward
the front of the venue,
Allison and Mitchell were about to discover what Teddy Bear Beat
was all about. The music started, and the four-year-old
cheerleaders at the very front shouted: “Yay! Fall Down
Teddy!”

The curtains
swished open and the band was there—two blond young men and a girl
wearing blue dungarees printed with teddies, and bright T-shirts
underneath—each a different colour. The children squealed their
approval.

The band
started to play. Their music was loud, rhythmic and rocking, and
very familiar.

Allison’s
mouth went dry and she had to swallow hard. It couldn’t be Joe’s
song. The one she and Mitchell had danced to. Just a similar tune.
He couldn’t have lied about composing it. She couldn’t bear it if
he had lied.

But the tune
was just the same. She would never forget it, the way she couldn’t
forget Joe; had thought constantly of him the ten days past. She’d
gone over and over the scene in her living room, wondering if she
could have said something different. If she shouldn’t have seized
the chance of something glorious with him, instead of standing on
cold and lonely principle.

From
offstage, a man started singing to the music—the same words as
Joe’s song. Children in the audience tumbled down and waved their
arms and legs in the air, just as Joe had taught Mitchell to do.
The voice, distinctively deep and husky, sounded like Joe’s
voice.

Then the
fourth member of Teddy Bear Beat
ran onto
the stage. He was tall with dark curly hair tied back from his
face, broad-shouldered and buff.

Allison’s
heart skipped a beat and she could hardly breathe. She could
scarcely hear Mitchell’s excited squeals of, “Joe, Momma,
Joe!”

She couldn’t
keep her eyes off Mitchell’s former nanny. In dungarees and bright
red T-shirt he looked far from the sexy denim-and-leather-clad
biker she knew. But his rear end looked just as appealing; his
chest as impressive. He was still hands-down the most desirable man
she’d ever seen.

The effect wasn’t lost on the other mothers
in the hall either, they were squealing nearly as loudly as the
kids.

Allison
reeled with shock. She had never dreamed Joe’s band was a kids’
band. He’d never told her anything about it—but then she’d never
asked.

Teddy Bear
Beat
was a great gimmick for the kids,
and something for the mommies to feast their eyes on. The daddies,
too. The female teddy was petite and cute with cropped red curls,
and the other two guys hadn’t exactly been touched with the ugly
stick either.

The band launched into its next number.
Although Joe was obviously the star, all four were highly skilled
musicians delivering a unique brand of kids’ rock and roll.

Allison’s
heart did a curious, panicky flip as Joe looked in her direction.
He couldn’t possibly see her among all these kids and their
parents. Even though, it seemed like he was singing just to
her.

She had to
get out. There was no point in meeting with him again. He’d made it
clear he wasn’t interested in her as a package deal with Mitchell.
All he wanted from her was a casual bedmate. And that wasn’t what
she was looking for.

She’d
thought hard about it as she’d tossed, sleepless, in her lonely
bed. Should she just have said “yes” to a sexual fling with Joe,
and accepted that was all it could ever be? But flings with no
future weren’t her scene.

Maybe some
men could walk away undamaged from those no-strings kind of deals,
but she wouldn’t. It would be too easy to get attached to Joe; too
easy for her—and Mitchell—to get hurt.

Her heart pounding, she looked frantically
around for the nearest exit.

J
oe was finding it almost
impossible to concentrate on the song—a zappy little number about
brushing teeth. Lucky it was really Lindy’s song, and he could step
back a little from the spotlight. He couldn’t believe Allison was
there.

He’d spotted
her as soon as he’d come on stage. In a room packed with attractive
young mothers, Allison stood out. What was it about this woman that
meant other women simply didn’t exist for him?

He’d stomped
away from her house last week, furious he’d made such a mess of
things. But the cool night air rushing over his face, as he’d
roared off on his motorbike, had cleared his head. He’d get over
her. After all, what was there to get over? He’d only known Allison
a few days.

But in those
few days she’d really gotten under his skin. He hadn’t stopped
seeing her face before his eyes since. And here she was in reality.
In the gorgeous, living flesh.

And Mitchell, too. Look at the little guy.
Grooving away to the music. He had a great sense of rhythm for a
kid so young. Could even end up as a musician himself.

Joe felt a
curious sensation of regret when he realized that kind of future
was highly unlikely to be Mitchell’s. With both parents bankers,
he’d probably be steered toward that path himself. Nothing
creative. Nothing unconventional. Especially if he ended up with
someone like Clive for a stepfather.

Lindy cast
him an alarmed look, and Joe realized he’d struck a discordant
twang on his guitar at the very thought of it. Would someone like
Clive care for Mitchell? Would he be a good dad to him?

Joe hit the
wrong note again. What was the matter with him? The thought of
Allison with Clive made him ready to fight World War Three. But
since when did Mitchell enter the equation?

Concentrate.
Concentrate on the
concert. Not on that luscious blonde woman in the audience and her
delightful little son.

No! She was looking anxiously around the
room for a way out. She was planning to bolt. No wonder, after the
things he’d said to her the other night. He couldn’t let her go.
Frantically he cast around for a way to stop her.