There was one thing about
Cole that disturbed me: his short fuse. Although I had not seen him get really
angry until recently, I had a feeling there was an underlying rage that might
surface at any moment. I might be wrong, but I didn’t want to find out. It left
me with an uneasy feeling.
Cole’s behavior reminded me
of a friend of mine back in
Newport News
. I went to high school with Angie, and after high
school we both got a job working at Coleman’s Department Store. She married
Gary, her high school sweetheart, and everything was lovely.
Shortly afterwards, Angie
started showing up at work with a black eye or other bruises on her body, and
it was happening on a regular basis.
Finally, one day I
confronted her about her black eye. I told her I was her friend, and wanted to
help. I knew something was wrong. Nobody was that clumsy so I asked her to tell
me the truth.
When she broke down and
told me that her husband beat her, I was mystified. I found it hard to believe
that
Gary
was that kind of person.
She said that
Gary
was
wonderful man, or so everybody thought. On the outside, he was kind, friendly,
and about as good-hearted as they come. But that was on the outside, when he
was around people. When they were at home and nobody was around, he had a
terrible temper. He would throw things at her, and slap her around. Once he
chased her around the house with a butcher knife, and threatened to slit her
throat. He told her he could cut her up into little pieces, and feed her body
parts to the fish in the
James River
, and nobody would ever know.
She was terrified of him,
and didn’t know what to do. She said he told her that if she ever left him, he
would hunt her down and kill her. He threatened to kill her parents. He made
her life miserable.
A few months later, on his
ride home from work, a car ran a red light and T-boned him at an intersection.
He died instantly.
When I saw Angie at the
funeral, she was almost hysterical.
I thought she would have
been glad to have him off her back, but she wasn’t. She said that no matter
what, he was her husband, and she still loved him. I was appalled. I couldn’t
believe she still loved him after all he had done to her.
I told her that I guess
they weren’t married long enough for him to kill her. She never spoke to me
after that.
I didn’t understand her
rationalization, and I never got a chance to find out how she could forgive
him. Angie moved out of state, and I never saw her again.
Sometimes, I still think
about her. I hope her life is better.
If Claire and Cole should
start to develop a relationship, I would warn her of my suspicions. I wouldn’t
want her to get stuck in a situation such as my friend, Angie. Nobody deserves
to be physically abused.
My thoughts went back to
Billy and me.
“That’s crazy,” I said to
no one in particular. “It’ll never work.”
The dogs came to life. Now
that the sense of danger had passed, Thor and Athena wanted to play. It’s
amazing how dogs can be so much like people. They have a personality all of
their own, and it made me wonder why I never noticed it. Athena was a quiet,
subdued young lass while Thor was a rowdy, rambunctious, needy lad. And they
both wanted to be right beside me all the time. It seems they wanted the same
thing I did... love and companionship.
“That’s enough,” I patted
their heads. “I have to get dressed before Billy gets back. Go lay down or
play.”
I stood up and headed to
the bedroom with my two shadows hot on my heels. Eventually, I managed to put
together a decent looking outfit. I selected a pair of black dress slacks made
of a wool blend, and a white turtleneck sweater. My ensemble wasn’t anything
fancy, but my clothes were clean and neat, and for an extra touch, I added the
locket on a chain that Mom had given me years ago. It contained a picture of
her and Dad.
With gun in hand, I walked
back to the living room to wait for Billy. I picked up my purse from the table
and took out my hairbrush. I had yet to purchase a blow dryer and had to settle
for drying my hair by the fire. Mindful not to get soot or ashes on my pants, I
sat down and began the task of brushing my long hair. Maybe soon I would get my
hair cut and styled like I had planned on doing many times, but never seem to
have the motivation. I decided that tomorrow would be the day. I would have my
hair styled and do some shopping. I removed the check from my purse that Mom
had given me. I definitely had the money to do both. But first I would pay off
the rest of the money I owed Billy for financing my car.
I had ignored the flashing
message on the computer screen until Billy returned and upon noticing it, flew
into a rage.
“Why didn’t you call me?”
“Why? You couldn’t have done
anything. Besides, you needed some time to yourself. You do have a life that
doesn’t always include me.”
“Not anymore.” He smiled
and walked closer. “You look nice.”
“Thanks, I aim to please.
You look pretty spiffy yourself.”
He was dressed in a pair of
black Dockers with a white, button-down shirt, and he wore one of those cowboy
ties with a slip gadget, around his neck. His damp hair was pulled back in a
ponytail. I could smell the scent of Old Spice.
“We look like twins,” I
said.
He leaned down and gave me
a soft kiss on the cheek.
“I’ve been doing some
thinking,” he said. He turned, walked over to the computer, and began pecking
on the keyboard. His back was to me while he talked. “I know you think I’m too
old for you, but it’s time you get with the program and lose that crazy notion.
Age doesn’t make a difference anymore or haven’t you noticed? We’re in the new
millennium now... Ah, ha! I’ve gotcha!”
“What is it? What have you
got?”
“Oh, only the e-mail
address of your friend who sent you this nice little message. What an idiot.”
He turned around to face me. “People can be so stupid sometimes. Don’t they
know there’re ways to trace everything on the computer? You just have to know
how.” He laughed and turned back to the computer. “All I have to do is connect
the e-mail address to a name.”
“You can do that? I’m
surprised. I thought that would be impossible.”
“Honey, I can do anything,”
he said. “Just you wait and see. I’ll nail their butts to the wall before it’s
over. I’ll make them sorry that they ever messed with us.”
That was the first time
Billy had called me something so personal in that way. The word honey flowed
out of his mouth as smooth as silk. It seemed so natural. As a matter-of-fact,
I liked it. I was beginning to like a lot of things about him. I touched his
shoulder.
“Can’t we leave this behind
us for just a little while? I’m ready to go see your family. I could use some
fun.”
“Sure,” he said. “But
first, I need to know where you want me to put my duffel bag—upstairs or
downstairs?”
Now was the time... it was
do
or die.
My answer could very well make this relationship or bring it to
a dead stop. I hesitated for just a second.
“Downstairs,” I whispered.
His arms engulfed me,
pulling me within inches of his face. His lips came down on mine with a passion
that made my heart ache for more. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he
lifted me into his arms, and carried me to the bedroom. His touch was heavenly.
Needless to say, by the
time we arrived at his parent’s house, we were one big wrinkled mess. I was
slightly embarrassed by our appearance as we stood at the door waiting for
someone to answer. Billy laughed and tried to assure me that we looked fine.
“Wow, you really do wear
your heart on your sleeve.” His hand found mine and gave it a squeeze as he
whispered in my ear, “No one can tell.”
The door opened and we were
greeted by Chief Standing Deer and Sarah. Father and son shook hands. Billy’s
mother gave me a hug.
“I’m glad you’re here.
Shall we join the rest of the family?”
The evening was such a
pleasant change from what had been going on for the last couple of days. Nobody
brought up the subject of dead bodies, nor did anyone ask us about our recent
brush with the law. However, I got a strange feeling in the pit of my stomach
when halfway through the meal, Robert asked the chief why Cole and his mother
didn’t show up.
“He sends his apologies,”
Sarah glanced my way. “He had to work and Elsie’s arthritis is acting up... or
so she says. You know Elsie, she doesn’t go anywhere alone.”
I sensed that brief
statement was intended for me. I think Sarah was trying to let me know that if
I wanted Cole, I’d also have to take his mother. It was her way of preparing me
for what I’d have to deal with if I decided to marry him. Boy, was she in for a
surprise. That was no longer a factor to be concerned about. Cole and I were
not going to get married. If I married anybody, it would be her son.
Sarah Blackhawk is very
much like my mother—neither one of them will hesitate for a moment to ask any
question they want to, regardless of how personal.
“Are you moving back or is
Jesse going to live in that house by herself?” She turned her attention to
Billy. “Is there something you want to tell us, or are we going to have to wait
and find out for ourselves?”
I almost choked on my glass
of iced tea.
Billy smiled, but said
nothing.
“I can see I’m not going to
get anything out of you two. I guess I’ll have to wait until I show up on your
front doorstep early one morning.”
The chief waved his hand at
his wife.
“Leave the kids alone `ge
ya. Can’t you tell you’re embarrassing Jesse?”
He turned his attention to
me. “Please forgive my wife. She has to know everything. I try to make her
behave, but she’s a stubborn squaw.”
The table erupted with
laughter. Conversations resumed, and the question was soon forgotten by
everyone except Billy and me.
The look in his eyes
convinced me that he would’ve told them about us, but he didn’t because of me.
For that, I was grateful. I wasn’t ready to reveal to the world what was going
on between the two of us. I wasn’t even sure myself.
It was close to
ten o’clock
when
Billy and I left.
I was stuffed full of food,
tired, and ready for bed. I was done. It had been a long, yet interesting day.
Billy took my hand in his
as we made our way out to his truck.
The few snowflakes we had
seen earlier had turned into another mountain snowstorm. A couple of inches had
fallen while we were having dinner and now it was really coming down hard as
rain. If we were getting this much snow now and it was only Thanksgiving, I
could imagine what it would be like when winter really set in. I would be
afraid to leave the house. I wasn’t used to driving in the snow and this was
going to be a real challenge. I didn’t want to drive and I was glad Billy was
behind the wheel.
“This could get bad,” Billy
said. “We’d better get home. Thank goodness we don’t have far to go.”
“I agree,” I said, sliding
across the seat close to him. “I had a good time tonight. You have a nice
family. Your mother is a real card.”
“Yeah, I’m sorry about
that. She has an uncanny way of seeing through people. She knows more about
what’s going on most of the time than we do. She has her suspicions about us or
she never would’ve said anything. Trust me... she won’t rest until she gets to
the bottom of it. Be prepared. Anything could happen.”
“She reminds me of my
mother. Maybe that’s why you’re so fond of my mom. They’re two of a kind.”
“Yeah, they’re so much
alike, you’d think they were sisters.”
“Nothing surprises me
anymore when it comes to my mom. She’s really changed since Dad died. I guess
she had to. Her life is different without him. I know she misses him. I sure
do. I know I probably shouldn’t say this, but I hope, one day down the road,
that Mom finds someone else. I don’t want her to spend the rest of her life
alone. I know Dad wouldn’t want her to either. He would want her to go on with
her life.”
Billy and I were making
small talk, avoiding what was about to happen next. We both knew that once we
crossed that threshold, our relationship was going to take on a new meaning. We
were about to make a commitment that obviously scared us both. He had been
married to the same woman for many years and it had taken him a long time to
get over her. His hurt ran deep, and I was sure he had his reservations about
me. He knew I was not much on long-term relationships; he’d seen it with his
own eyes. Plus, I was thirty-two years old and had never been married. I had
seen more bad relationships than I had good ones. I didn’t know what to expect
and I was a bit gun-shy.
“Do you think that I should
put my truck in the garage?” he asked, pulling up to the front of the house.
“Or should I leave it out front for the whole world to see? It’s up to you.” He
stared straight ahead, waiting for my response.