[Southern Arcana 3.0] Deadlock (19 page)

“He’s beautiful.”

“I think so.” Michelle set down her cup and reached out to smooth the edge of the blanket before touching her son’s cheek. “I admit to my share of maternal bias. But you didn’t come all this way to see my son.”

“No,” she admitted. “I’m here because of magic I didn’t ask for and know nothing about.”

Michelle faced Carmen. A tiny crease appeared between her eyebrows as she narrowed her eyes. “Yes. It’s still tangled around you. Powerful magic, and reckless. I was afraid of that.”

How could she explain the lengths to which her father had gone, whatever his reasons? “Is it…dangerous?”

“Yes.” Gentle, but uncompromising. “Trying to make a shapeshifter with magic is no safer than trying to turn a human through violence. It’s a hundred times more dangerous when there’s already magic involved. In your case, more than one kind of magic.”

Carmen willed her hands to wait until she’d set her cup aside before they began trembling. “Dangerous to me or to others?”

“Potentially both.” Michelle held out her hands. “If you let me, I can put shields in place. A temporary measure, but it will protect you and the people around you until I can figure out how to unweave the spell.”

The Seer was a brand-new mother, and a closer look revealed the beginnings of dark circles of exhaustion under her eyes. “Will it wait?”

“For a day or two. Mahalia is still here, and she has experience and finesse that I lack.”

The spell her father had paid for was fractured, broken. It would take a Seer and another witch, one Alec had talked about with deep respect, to dissolve the shards of magic that could still make her bleed.

Carmen knew she should be frightened—
needed
to be—but all she felt was numb. “You and your husband are very kind for having me here.”

Michelle’s lips pressed together, and the first hint of emotion broke through her excellent shields—pain. “Our society seems to have no boundaries in how far it will go to protect status and prejudice. My child lost his father, Alec lost his wife…and you could have died. Anything I can do to stop them is more selfish than selfless, believe me.”

“Whatever your reasons, I’m grateful.”

“It’s noth—”

A tiny cough drifted up from the bassinet and, in one heartbeat, the confident Seer melted away, replaced by a frantic new mother who lifted her son into her arms with an expression that bordered on panic.

The baby fussed at being woken so unceremoniously, and Carmen watched Michelle for a moment before rising from her chair. “May I look at him?”

“He’s had a cough…” After a split-second hesitation, Michelle held him out. “I know you’re not a pediatrician, but do you think I should call for the doctor? There’s a witch my father has on retainer.”

“Nah, let’s see the little guy.” Carmen nestled the baby in one arm and peeled back his blanket. His skin was a healthy pink, with none of the blue tinge that would accompany inadequate oxygenation. “Has he been wheezing with the cough?”

“No, no wheezing. It hasn’t been too bad, but he was born early…”

The baby looked okay, but Carmen asked a few more questions, more to be thorough than anything. Michelle’s answers confirmed her suspicions, and Carmen smiled as she tickled him on the cheek. “He’s healthy. Yeah, you’re doing just fine, aren’t you?”

Michelle dropped back into her chair with a relieved sigh. “The witch has politely warned me against overreacting. Intellectually, I understand, but it doesn’t make it easier.”

“They’re tiny and helpless, and that’s scary all on its own.” Carmen rocked the baby slowly and turned her attention to Michelle. “What about you? How are you doing?”

“Fine, aside from the lack of sleep. Shapeshifters can heal from a lot, but not exhaustion.” Her brown eyes drifted shut. “I’m told this is a natural state for a new mother.”

“I was almost a teenager when my mother had her youngest. I remember.”

Michelle rubbed at her face and smoothed her hair. “It’s making me scattered. I can’t remember if I’ve explained
why
the spell they’ve tried to use is so dangerous.”

“Because I’m already part wolf?”

“Yes. And not just that—you’re from a strong bloodline.” Michelle opened her eyes and gave Carmen a look that seemed almost apologetic. “One of my jobs as the Conclave’s Seer was knowing everything about the council members. Strengths that could be used and weaknesses that could be exploited.”

It wasn’t a secret. It couldn’t be, not when her uncle made sure everyone knew about Julio, the wolf born to a fully human mother. “My family doesn’t try to hide the strength of that blood. Quite the opposite.”

“I know. Which is why this was incredibly reckless. There’s a reason wolves don’t have their human offspring changed. The power in the change is all consuming. Someone with only a bit of shapeshifter blood might come through all right, but the magic in the change is linked to the one who made you. If their magic has to fight the magic already inside you, there’s no room for anything human.”

It was the most authoritative discussion of the spell that she was bound to get now that the witch was dead, and some tiny flame of hope within Carmen died. It shouldn’t still hurt, damn it, because she’d already told herself the hard truth about her family and her place in it, already forced herself to face it.

A gentle hand settled on her arm. “I’m sorry.”

Carmen shook her head and shifted the child she held back into his mother’s arms. “It’s not news. It’s—it’s something I should have understood a long time ago.”

“But not something easy to understand. Not something you should have to understand.”

Definitely not, but it didn’t change reality or the truth of her situation. “If this magic is going to be taxing for you, then you should wait as long as you can. I don’t want to trespass on your hospitality too long, but if you might hurt yourself doing this—”

Michelle shook her head and cut her off. “No, not at all. I have the power to spare, even as tired as I am. But Mahalia… She’s the magical equivalent of a scalpel. I’m more of a claymore. You need a little bit of both.”

“Okay.” Carmen took a deep breath. “When?”

“Tomorrow, I think.” Michelle rose and tucked her son back into his bassinet. “A day to prepare, and a day afterwards to be sure there are no lasting effects. Can you spare three days?”

“If I won’t be in the way.”

“Only if you don’t mind living at the whim of a two-week-old who can be heard halfway to Laramie.”

Carmen’s cheeks heated. “Your husband told me I could put my things out in the guesthouse, if that’s all right.”

Michelle pursed her lips, almost as if she was holding back a laugh. “Shapeshifter boys don’t always play well together. Luciano and Alec have…a bit of a rocky history. Alec will probably be more comfortable in the guesthouse, and more comfortable with you there too.”

Of course, the Seer would have figured out their situation just as quickly as anyone else. “It seemed to be a bit of a territorial issue.”

“So much of our lives can be.” She hesitated, then tilted her head. “May I ask a personal question?”

“Of course.”

“Will you regret not becoming a wolf?”

It stopped Carmen cold, because she hadn’t considered it. She’d thought about how she might handle it if it happened, of course, but only as how she would deal with the inevitable complications. Only how she’d survive with her sanity intact.

She’d never thought she might want to become a wolf, not once. She’d spent too much time avoiding what it meant that she carried wolf blood at all, and becoming part of that society…

Isn’t that what you’ve done?
Inviting Alec into her bed, her
life
, meant that she would never be able to truly separate herself from wolf society. He existed on the rebellious edge of that world…but he was still
in
it.

And he’d already told her it was a dangerous place. Maybe becoming a wolf would help her stay safe in the midst of that chaos.

Carmen found herself shaking her head. “No. No, I won’t regret it. There’s only one reason I’d even consider wanting to become a wolf and—and it’s a bad reason. I can’t change myself like that for someone else. I won’t.” And if Alec cared about her at all, he wouldn’t want that either.

Michelle’s smile held more than a little relief. “I’m glad. Because it could be that the only way we can fix this will be to twist the spell in on itself. Turn it from danger to protection. It would mean you could never be changed, not even if you chose to.”

Even with her decision made, Carmen expected a measure of panic at the finality Michelle described, but it never came. “I’m okay with that.”

A short nod. “Do you have any more questions?”

She probably wanted to rest while her baby did, so Carmen shook her head and rose. “Thank you, but no. I think I’ll go lie down for a while.”

“Make yourself at home. If you need anything at all, please let me know.”

With Carmen safely ensconced in Michelle’s sitting room and Luciano off dealing with some sort of ranch emergency, Alec sought out the one familiar face he hadn’t seen in far too long.

He found his cousin in the kitchen, wrestling with a pan, packages of cream cheese piled high on the counter beside him. “Making cheesecake tonight.”

Gus hadn’t changed much. He was still large, blunt and about as pretentious as a stack of bricks. It made him a welcome relief from the rest of the Jacobson clan. “That’s a lot of cream cheese.”

Gus snorted. “I guess that means asking you for help with this damn springform thing is out of the question.”

As if he knew what a springform thing
was
—presumably the round pan Gus was glaring at. “Depends on what you want to do with it. Carmen could probably set you on the right track, though.”

“Yeah? She good in the kitchen?”

“Kept me from starving.”

Gus dropped the round piece of metal on the counter and eyed Alec. “Are you gonna let me meet her?”

It shouldn’t have brought protective rage bubbling to the surface. Maybe the magic was affecting him too, triggering an instinctive reaction that went far beyond hot sex and enjoyment of her company. Hadn’t he spent hours explaining the mating urge to Derek and Andrew, fighting to explain the inexplicable? Carmen might not be a wolf, but she felt like one.

A nice, easy explanation that would give him an excuse for running through half a box of condoms with her. It didn’t explain the fact that his cousin—his friend—felt like a threat.

“Settle down, Alec. I didn’t ask if I could see her naked.”

Maybe he could break the pan over his cousin’s head. “Back off. It’s been a weird fucking week.”

“Don’t doubt it in the least.” Gus smiled, a rare expression that made him look ten years younger. “It’s good to see you.”

Alec’s aggression faded a little. “Good to see you too. When you’re not jabbing at me just to see if I’ll snap.”

“Is that what you think that was?” He laughed. “Everyone down in Louisiana goes too easy on you.”

“They probably do.” Alec leaned against the counter and took in the industrial kitchen, with its large, heavy pots that would make it easy to cook for dozens. “I never realized just how serious Luciano took this ranching business. I always thought he was a city boy, playing at being a cowboy.”

“Luke? Hell, no. It’s a solid operation. He’s got one Crabbet that’s fetching a stud fee you wouldn’t believe.”

He’d long since written Luciano off as a spineless mama’s boy, but the kid had showed some pluck in the last year. He’d stood up to his family and the whole damn Conclave by marrying Michelle and taking another man’s child under his protection. That their marriage was one of convenience and polite distance was well known. That Luciano had feelings for the woman who had made it gently clear she could never return them was more of a secret.

And a tragedy. It was hard not to respect a man who’d stomp on his own heart to do the right thing. “Sometimes I almost miss ranch life. I haven’t been back to Texas in…ten years, maybe.”

“Me neither.” Gus picked up the pan again. This time, he managed to fit a piece of glass in the bottom and lock a lever mechanism in place. “You’d think the damn state would be big enough for us to go and still avoid our family, wouldn’t you?”

“My father’s probably got spies posted on every road in, waiting for his chance to ambush me on his turf.”

“Good reason to stay away, if you ask me.”

“Agreed. You could come down and visit me, you know. New Orleans is…”

“Interesting?” Gus supplied with a raised eyebrow. “I’ve got some time off coming. Maybe I’ll do that.”

“And maybe I’ll put you to work, helping me save the world.” Alec glanced at his watch, then toward the door. “I suppose if I go and check on them, I’ll get kicked back out.”

“If you’re lucky.” A large bowl clattered on the countertop. “Your woman’s safe. Michelle will help her.”

“My woman.” He said it without meaning to, and Christ, it felt too good. “Better not call her that where she can hear.”

“Why not?” The question was more matter-of-fact than probing. “Hasn’t she figured it out yet?”

A good fucking question, and one he wasn’t feeling a pressing need to discuss with her. “She’s not a wolf.”

“Does she know wolves, though? And, more to the point, does she know
you
?”

“She’s getting there.” Alec crossed his arms over his chest and gave his cousin a look. “If no one scares her off.”

Gus cracked an egg with a chuckle. “If you haven’t terrified her with your scowling, she’s not going anywhere. Trust me on that.”

“You’re awful amused. Truth be told, I thought you’d be a little more pissy about me taking up with a Mendoza.”

The second egg disintegrated in Gus’s hand, and he turned a shocked stare to Alec. “Tell me that’s not Diego Mendoza’s daughter.”

Oh, shit.
“You thought she was a random Mendoza tied up in a shapeshifter mess?”

“Hell, all Michelle mentioned was some sort of magic spell gone wrong. I didn’t put two and two together.” Gus rinsed his hand with a grimace. “You don’t do things by half, do you?”

Alec watched his cousin pick eggshells out of the bowl. “Didn’t plan to do it at all. It’s complicated.”