Southern Belles, a Novel About Love, Purpose & Second Chances (9781310340970) (12 page)

“CeCe, you are more than welcome to come
over for Thanksgiving dinner if your mother burns the turkey
again.” My mother said walking CeCe to the door.

“And if she orders Chinese—I will definitely
be over for some of your turkey and stuffing.” CeCe said.

“Absolutely, and bring your parents. Your
poor dad should have at least one good home-cooked meal.” My mother
said with a faint smile on her face.

Things were back to normal. It was as if
nothing had changed. I was home and comforted by the familiarity of
my surroundings. I laid down on one of the sofas and relaxed a
moment. I figured I didn’t have to tell them right away. I would
tell them before I left. I just wanted to relax and for once forget
about the last 12 weeks. It was good to be home. I knew my mother
would be cooking real food for me while I was home for Thanksgiving
break and my nausea was finally starting to lesson. I could sleep
in my soft bed and catch up with Richie about everything happening
around town. I wasn’t showing yet and had started to feel better. I
figured this was a good vacation for me. I didn’t have to worry
about exams or the little person growing in my belly, for now.

“Richie, take your sister’s bags upstairs.”
My mother hollered from inside the kitchen.

“Why? What’s wrong with her two legs?”

Suddenly, I became paranoid. Had she noticed
anything different about me? I could take my own bags upstairs. Why
did she ask him to carry my bags?

“Richard Henry be the gentleman we taught
you to be.” She said leaning around the corner to eyeball him.

“Fine, fine—I just had to harass her a
little. Of course, I’ll take her bags upstairs. She’s my favorite
sister.”

“I’m your only sister, Richie.” I said
pushing him up the stairs.

“Oh that’s right. But you could also be my
least favorite—but you’re not.”

“Ugh! Richie, I missed you—you little devil.
You have to tell me all the gossip I missed.”

“That’s fine but you have to tell me about
college life and all the parties you’re going to take me too when I
visit.” Richie said as he plopped my bags onto my bedroom
floor.

Suddenly, a white bottle launched from my
purse and rolled onto the floor just feet from Richie.

“I’ll get it. Sorry about that.” Richie
lurched.

Realizing quickly after seeing the baby on
the white bottle that my prenatal vitamins had flung out of my
purse I quickly reached for it, trying desperately to grab it
before Richie. Unfortunately, he got to it first. Picking up the
bottle and focusing on the picture I hoped he’d miss; he looked at
me dumbfounded.

“Are these yours?”

With my mouth gapping open, I nodded my head
yes.

“Char,” our mother yelled as she came up the
stairs. “Just dump your dirty clothes in the hamper. I’m sure
you’ll want them clean before you leave.”

Looking frantically at Richie and the bottle
in his hands, I motioned for him to toss it in the closet before
mom came in. Silently shocked, he ditched it in a stack of clothes
in the closet while I tried to look normal.

“I really missed you honey; I’m so glad your
home.” She said as she came in my bedroom to give me another
hug.

“I missed you too mom.” I said with her back
facing Richie.

“You feel skinnier. I’m going to need to
fatten you up before you leave.”

Richie tilted his head to the side, his lips
pouting, silently rubbing his belly in a circular motion.

Threatening him with my killer gaze, I
replied “Yes mom, I’m sure your food will help fatten me up.”

“Okay, I’m done being mushy. I just missed
you so much. You two need to be downstairs in ten minutes for
dinner.” She said, giving me a quick peck on my cheek before
heading towards the door.

I walked over to Richie after she left the
room. I waited a moment until I could hear her footsteps going down
the stairs and then jabbed Richie in the arm.

“Ouch! What’s that for?”

“You know what for. What if she turned
around and saw you?” I said trying to keep my voice down because I
knew my mother had ears that could hear a whisper a mile away.

“So, what in the world happened?” Richie
asked curiously. “When and with who?”

Questions kept spewing from his mouth. By
this time he had made himself comfortable on my bed and was
demanding answers.

“It wasn’t that boy that you met at the
party before you left for Athens—was it? The one you keep asking
mom whether or not he called. Is it? I’ll hunt him down and hurt
him.” Richie said growing quickly frustrated.

“Yes, but.”

“What?” Richie interrupted before I could
shush him.

“Did he ever call you Char?”

“No, I haven’t been able to get a hold of
him.”

“What a prick-good-for-nothing!”

“Richie,” I whispered. “I’m scared but it’s
going to be okay; I hope.”

“When are you due?”

“June seventh. I went to the doctor and she
said everything looks great. She even gave me a picture from the
ultrasound. He looks like he’s waving at me.”

“It’s a he? You should name him Richie.”

“Nah, I don’t know if it’s a boy. I won’t
know until he’s between 16-20 weeks along.”

“What are you going to tell mom and dad?
Dad’s going to kill you. Well he’ll wait until the baby’s
born.”

“Ouch!” Richie yelled again as I jabbed him
in the shoulder causing him to crumble into the bed.

“I don’t know yet. I’m hoping that maybe you
could tell them with me? I don’t know what to say and if you’re
there—I won’t be so scared.”

“What are you going to do about school?” He
asked.

“I don’t know. I need to tell them first and
then figure out the rest. I imagine I’m going to have to come home.
I don’t think I can live so far away from them with a baby on my
own.”

“Hey, you should talk to Trudy—she’s always
asking about you two anyways. She misses her best customers. She’ll
be able to help.”

“I know I thought about her after I found
out. I love Trudy but I’m afraid that if I drop out of school, I’ll
be stuck in St. Marys for the rest of my life while everyone else
is living the dream.”

“Char, Trudy’s happy.”

“Maybe that’s good for her but that’s not
what I want for me. I’m scared that I’ll never get to travel the
world let alone finish school. I’m having this baby but I feel like
my world’s stopped. I’m going to be a single mom at 19. This baby’s
never going to know his dad—we’ll be poor.”

“Char, I know you. You are not the type of
person to sit back and watch from the sidelines. You will finish
what you started and you will reach your dreams. I know you
will.”

“Thanks Richie. I know I’m doing the right
thing but it doesn’t help me feel like any less of a failure or a
big fat let-down for mom and dad.”

“They’re going to be mad—dad’s going to be
very mad but they’ll always love you Char. And when that baby
comes, he or she will be the cutest thing ever and they’ll forget
how angry they were.”

Smiling dimly, his words helped. They were
true and spoken from his heart. I still couldn’t help but feel
panicky about how on earth I’d tell them and how things would go
after that. I knew things would change drastically. I considered
myself fairly mature for my age but this would force me to leave my
childhood behind permanently. I wasn’t ready for that just yet. As
long as I kept quiet I could enjoy another month before I had to
face the truth and my parents. I resigned myself to secrecy about
the pregnancy until I came home for good at Christmas break. At
least that way I could say I completed one semester of college.

Dinner that night was wonderful. It was as
if nothing had changed and all things were good. I sat back and
listened to stories that occurred while I was away at college—more
mischief my brothers got into. My mom kept smiling at me and
bragging to Grandma Rose and Aunt Juanita about my straight A’s I
got this semester. If only she knew how sick I’d been she would
have been shocked that I was able to keep them up. My dad was, as
always, enjoying the food and listening to the shenanigans my
brothers boasted about. It felt good to be home again. I hoped it
would be this way when they found out. I was worried that things
would change—that they would look at me differently after everyone
knew. I didn’t want to think about that anymore. As I sat and
listened my mind went off in another direction. I took a seat in an
empty chair at the back of my mind; a place where I still dreamt of
Skylar. It was dusty and I could see only his crystal blue eyes
clearly. I remembered his soft sculpted jaw line and his perfect
supple lips. My breathing slowed again and I relaxed. I had to
catch myself from tearing up so no one noticed. Even with the hurt
he had caused me, I still longed to have him back in my life. This
baby would be the next closest thing to him.

Chapter 9: Christmas Surprises

Thanksgiving break had come and gone so quickly. We
were back at school, now, and prepping for semester finals. I was
knee deep in books and eating everything in sight. My appetite had
finally returned and my mouth was like a magnet—picking up anything
that was edible. I had been back to see the OBGYN again and had
regained the nine pounds I’d lost and found two more somewhere
else. Although I hadn’t grown a bump yet I knew it wouldn’t be
long. After finals I would have no choice but to tell my parents
since I wouldn’t be returning to Athens again, except to visit
CeCe—if my dad didn’t put me on house-arrest. At least Richie knew,
making it a little easier knowing that CeCe wasn’t the only person
supporting me in this. He was so sweet and in the two weeks
following Thanksgiving break he sent me two care packages loaded
with chocolate and People magazines—two things I enjoyed.

CeCe had been successfully accepted into the
Tri Delta sorority and was elated. I was happy for her but saw less
of her now that she was expected to attend sorority events,
meetings, and hang out with her new sisters. She remained very
supportive but a piece of me was a little envious of her. She had
the rest of her life to reach her dreams with no obstacles in her
way. She was liked by everyone there and began talking more and
more about funny stories that happened when she was with her Tri
Deltas. She was enjoying life and had no concern in the world other
than what she was going to wear to the next house party. I smiled
and listened to her stories while in my head I told myself how
unfair this picture was. I had always been the good girl, did the
right thing, and followed the rules. The one time I lose my head
and give into temptation I end up screwing up my whole life. CeCe
had broken numerous rules and laughed about it while she decided
what shade of lipstick looked best. I loved her to pieces but I
just couldn’t figure out why this was happening to me. I didn’t
deserve to be put on the sidelines of life. I didn’t even kill
spiders when everyone else shrieks and throws a shoe at em. I, at
least, had the decency to put em in a glass and throw em outside—so
they could live and be free.

It wasn’t CeCe’s fault that any of this
happened, I told myself. She would be hurt if she could hear my
thoughts. I was frustrated and probably a little angry with myself
too. I was angry that I was naïve and dumb enough to fall for a
joke on me.

I troughed through and kept my thoughts to
myself. I finished up the semester with a 4.0. CeCe worked really
hard and got a 2.9. She helped me pack up my things and didn’t want
me to carry anything heavy. She got some of her new fraternity
brothers to help us load up her parent’s SUV. She agreed to let me
keep a few things in her vehicle until I worked up the nerve to
tell my parents. I didn’t want them to ask questions upon my
arrival as to why I brought all my things back. After everything
was packed I asked CeCe for a moment alone in our room. I also
didn’t want to see any of our friends in the hall. I didn’t want to
have to tell them I got knocked up and had to drop out of college
and that’s why I’m not coming back. CeCe made sure no one was
around so I could have a few minutes of peace before sneaking down
to the SUV. I sat quietly on my bare bed. I had stripped the sheets
and now only the bones of the bed appeared just as empty as it did
the day we moved in. Except then, it promised a future of good
things—a foundation of which to build on. Now, it was a reminder of
what my future would be like, empty and dull. A tear streamed down
my cheek and I felt a sting of pain in my head. I had worked so
hard to get here and now one night had taken it all away. I spoke
out loud “God is this it? Is this all my life has for me, nothing?”
I began to get angry again; I could feel a tinge of resentment
build up. I decided to leave as I didn’t want to make this any
harder than it already was for me. I had a tough road ahead and to
cause myself any more mental anguish was not good for me…or the
baby.

The long drive home kept me quiet. I watched
the barren fields as we drove by. They had already been harvested
and nothing but a few stalks remained, here and there. Small sleepy
towns snuck by us as we made our way home. The sky was a drab grey
and nothing spoke of life or the happiness I once knew. As we got
closer to home, my heart picked up. I didn’t have to tell them the
minute I saw them but I needed to tell them soon. From my profile
my belly now protruded a small bump. I figured I’d wear my
over-sized University of Georgia hoodie until I managed to tell
them. It and sweats were the most comfortable clothes I had at this
point. Most of my jeans had gotten to snug to wear and I didn’t
have the extra money to be buying new ones until I absolutely
needed to. I needed to save the little remaining money I had left
over, which had been reserved for school, for the baby.