Southern Rocker Boy (Southern Rockers Book 1) (20 page)

We lay for the next hour, simply kissing and holding each other. I traced her tattoos with one finger. I thought about that photo in Gay’s office, where she looked just like the girl next door. All this work was recent, clearly since Cody. “Tell me the story behind the tattoos,” I said as I held her close.

She shrugged. “It’s silly,” she finally said.

“Tell me anyway,” I commanded softly.

She sighed. “Before Cody, I tried to make the music thing work. Everyone wanted me to show skin or look a certain way, like some insipid pop princess. I tried it for a while, but it wasn’t me. It seems unfair that I’d get any more chances than someone else just because people think I’m pretty. I wanted them to hear the voice. To experience the music. The only way to do that was to take pretty out of the equation.”

I laughed. “You couldn’t do that no matter how many tattoos you get, sweet girl,” I crooned as I traced every bold line that now enhanced her skin. The art was beautiful. The girl was beautiful. There was no denying either.

“You’re biased,” she chuckled.

“Damn straight,” I agreed as I kissed her lips. “What’s the newest one?” I asked when we broke apart. She pointed to the thorny rose vine around her thigh. It was vibrant, so I suspected it was fairly recent. “What prompted you to get that?”

She laughed. “Every time someone tries to shove me into a box, I get a new tattoo. It’s my way of rebelling, I guess. To tell the world this is who I am, and nobody gets to change that but me.” An impish look glinted in her eye. “I got this after Gay told me to wear that miniskirt.”

I had to laugh. “You’re going to run out of skin to ink if you keep working at Southern Nights,” I said. She looked away. I turned her face back to mine and planted another kiss. Then I trailed my tongue around every bold outline of every tattoo, ending with the one on her thigh.

By then she was so worked up she pulled me on top of her for a deep kiss full of such intense longing it took my breath away. I made love to her slowly and thoroughly.

We didn’t leave the hotel until midnight. When we got back to the apartment, Mama was asleep with Cody at her side. She blinked awake as I untangled the toddler from her grasp. “Have a good time?” she asked.

“Yes,” Lacy said with a childlike blush in her cheek. It only made me love her more. “Thank you for watching him.”

“It was my pleasure,” she smiled. “And just between you and me, I think you have a babysitter in Leah if you ever need some time away. She’s completely in love with your son.”

Lacy nodded. “She’s a great kid. You should be proud.”

Mama put her hand on my shoulder. “I’m proud of both of my kids,” she said with a big smile.

I walked Lacy down to her car. Cody barely woke up in the transfer into the car seat in the back seat. When she shut the door, I turned her into my arms for another scorching kiss. “You could stay the night, you know.”

She shook her head. “I should get Cody home.”

I nodded. I understood. I kissed her again, tenderly. “Drive safe, sweetheart.”

She traced my lips with her fingertip. “Sweet dreams, Jonah.”

“I don’t need them anymore,” I dismissed with a shrug. “I’ve got you.”

Again tears filled her eyes. She blinked them away before she slid into the driver’s side. I stayed outside for long minutes after her taillights faded from view.

Mama was still awake when I let myself back into the apartment. She was tidying the kitchen as I grabbed a glass of water. “She seems nice,” Mama said, but there was a tone in her voice.

“She is,” I answered as I leaned against the counter and waited.

She mirrored my stance. “Are you sure you know what you’re doing, Jonah? That girl comes with a lot of baggage.”

“I know,” I said. I knew there were challenges, not only professionally but with her already having a child as well.  “But I love her, Mama.”

She sighed. “I was afraid of that.” She patted my arm. “But I trust you, baby. If you love her, I’m sure I will, too.”

I folded her into my arms for a strong hug.

I was in exceptional spirits as we headed into the weekend. It was hard as hell to be around Lacy and not take her into my arms. We channeled everything into the music, which seemed to please Gay after our first rehearsal on Thursday.

Surprising she had taken a lot of the romantic stuff out of the set. Our duet to perfect for the weekend was “
Under Pressure
.” Lacy acquiesced Freddie Mercury’s vocal to me, which I immediately resisted. But she was confident I could do it, and her faith in me made me want to rise the occasion. We found time to practice it even though we weren’t due to perform that song until the set on Saturday.

“I’m intimidated as hell,” I confessed that Friday night, after we had returned to our separate homes and were reduced to sharing soft conversations via cell phones.

“You can do it,” she assured. But her remark about my being Gay’s paper doll still lingered in my ear. Late at night, when I was exhausted and barely conscious, the thought that it wouldn’t really hurt her much if I crashed and burned chased across my brain.

But I suppressed it. I couldn’t love anyone who would be that duplicitous. And there was no question that I loved Lacy more and more every single day. She had inched into the sacred realm of my family. I would have taken a bullet for any of them.

Music, however, was coming a near second. The more I pushed myself, the more I loved what I was doing day after day. That I was being paid so much for it soon became a secondary consideration. I honestly couldn’t imagine going back to a farm or a factory. I wanted to be on that stage under those lights. Granted things had come exceptionally easy for me thus far, with no real downside other than the fact I couldn’t openly acknowledge my girlfriend. But with each new day, I couldn’t fight the lure of that stage. I wanted it. And if this was the way I had to do it, then that’s what I would do.

Once established, Lacy would be right there on the stage next to me, my duet partner till I died.

That following Monday followed the same pattern as the one before. She brought Cody to the apartment and Leah and Mama babysat while we escaped away to our hotel suite. As the night drew on, however, she grew more quiet and reflective.

“What’s wrong, baby?” I asked as I cuddled her close, reveling at how well our bodies fit together. Like we were made for each other.

“Nothing,” she lied. I stared into her eyes until she finally relented. “I’m just going to miss you the next few days.”

I nodded and kissed her forehead. Ariel Acardi arrived in the morning, and Gay had shut down the club for the rest of the week to record the video. It wouldn’t open again until Friday, when Ariel was going to perform for all her fans for the weekend.

“You know if I didn’t need the money, I wouldn’t go through with it.”

She laughed. “Liar.” My eyebrows rose. “You’d do it because it’s the smart thing to do. This is how you fast-track a career in the 21
st
century.”

I lifted on my elbow to stare down at her. “So if you know that, why don’t you do that?”

Again she chuckled. “Because no hunky superstar asked me to star in his video.”

I kissed her. “Yet,” I promised.

She shook her head. “That’s sweet but that’s not what I want, Jonah. I told you. I don’t care about fame. I just want to make my music and provide for my kid. That’s it.”

“Fame could do that nicely,” I told her. “Why struggle when you don’t have to?”

She shook her head as she looked at me. “You’re still star-struck, baby. Wait till fame costs you something, then get back to me.”

I smoothed her hair. “I’m sorry that sonofabitch hurt you.”

She shrugged. “It was my fault. I believed the lie.”

I bent for another kiss. “This isn’t a lie, darlin’. If nothing else, please believe that.”

She nodded but said nothing. Instead she reached for another kiss and I made love to her again. It was the last time for a week, so it’d have to hold us over.

The next day I was up by the time Mama left for work. Leah and I were heading down to the club for the private video shoot. Award winning directo
r
Roxy Malone had been hired for the job, and she was there before everyone. Her music videos were artistic and sexy and invariably made hit stars out of the people in them. Her recent work with Griffin Slade and
Fierce
season-one contestant Jordi Hemphill had vaulted both of them into the stratosphere despite a negative media campaign that targeted her larger body size. That Roxy decided to make the video unabashedly sexy only fueled the fire.

When she outlined the concept for the video, I knew I was in trouble.

She wanted Ariel to play a groupie in the audience, who got her chance with a hot singer on the stage, which, apparently, was to be played by me. The video would be edited with concert shots and an intimate love scene to be filmed at a four-star hotel… the very hotel where I had treated Lacy for our romantic Tuesdays together.

It made sense. It was close to the club and it had a lot of character and style. But the coincidence made my stomach sink.

Gay had already scheduled a fake audience for the video shoot, handpicking girls from various Meet & Greets to fill in the first few rows to indicate a full crowd of crazed groupies. When she saw Leah, she immediately decided that Leah had to be part of the crowd. Before I could offer any protest, Leah practically hopped into Gay’s arms to accept the offer.

Everyone was briefed on the etiquette required to interact with Ariel. No one was to speak directly to her, instead focusing all the attention on me. No one was supposed to encroach on her personal space, which meant she could be standing and dancing right next to someone and no one was supposed to touch her. That particular honor went to me as I pulled her on stage to serenade her personally, ‘overtaken with an intense attraction’ that I couldn’t deny, per Roxy Malone.

We set up the band to perform my ‘Ladies’ Night’ set, which meant all the sexy songs that had made me the talk of Austin. I was instructed to play it up as a sex god on stage, which felt uncomfortable to do in front of my sister. It took a few takes before I could get into character. I finally told myself that it was because of my sister that I needed to make this money. So instead I turned all the ladies in the front row, except for Leah, who sat atop one of the bouncer’s shoulders, into Lacy. I saw her face in every single one and delivered those lyrics with all the oomph they required.

When I got to Ariel, I imagined that she was Lacy as I saw her for the first time, only this time it was me on the stage. I used every single trick I knew to seduce her. She was totally in character too as she responded. When I pulled her up on stage, offering her the microphone so that she could sing, it almost shocked me that it wasn’t Lacy’s voice that dropped from her lips. She didn’t have a tenth of the talent that Lacy had, but she had the look.

I could see why that pissed Lacy off. Here she was, this international megastar, and I knew that her vocals would require fine-tuning in the editing room. While she was taking selfies and walking the red carpet, people like Lacy were in dark, dank clubs, paying their dues and getting paid pennies on every dollar they drew in, forcing them to live in some ratty old trailer and drove a beat up old car.

It wasn’t fair.

I tried to channel that into the performance, which ended up making me more sexually aggressive than I normally was. Ariel played the young ingénue well, overwhelmed by the attention of a dirty rocker boy who oozed sex.

Roxy ended the shoot with some shots from the dressing room, where I finally cornered my prey. These shots were even more difficult than the other ones had been, because I actually had to make moves on this girl I didn’t know and really didn’t respect.

That’s not the kind of man I ever was, so I found myself stiff and awkward. Roxy was a woman on a mission as they filmed take after take, until I could finally allow Ariel to crawl up my body as I sprawled on the dressing room sofa. We kissed, which felt took a bit of getting used to considering we were surrounded by a film crew. I tried to lose myself in the illusion as she ran her tiny hands along my bared chest, all the way to my unzipped jeans. I grabbed her by the hair and kissed her, which apparently pleased Roxy.

“Is that the bathroom?” she asked as she indicated toward the door on the other side of the dressing room.

Apparently “yes” was the wrong answer. She decided they wanted to film a steamy shower shot through the flimsy opaque shower curtain. She made a couple of phone calls and wardrobe was delivered to provide body suits for both of us, which would lend to the illusion of us being nude.

The lies continued.

I didn’t care for the shower angle at all because of what had happened with the drunk college girl. These fans didn’t need any kind of encouragement that they could fuck the talent if they just got close enough.

Plus I didn’t want Lacy to see it and wonder if maybe that particular incident wasn’t an accident.

I had enough trouble coming out from the shadow of the great Tony Paul. I didn’t need this fucking up things while they were going so well.

But I zipped my lip and let Roxy work her magic. When that shower curtain closed, I took Ariel into my arms. She wound her tiny body around me as I lifted her up. The shower steamed around us as I kissed her, my hands running over her body.

I cursed that my body didn’t seem to understand this wasn’t Lacy. I was deeply kissing a beautiful, sexy woman, that’s all it knew. I knew she had to feel me stir, which only seemed to make her more passionate. She grabbed my earlobe between her teeth, her breath hot in my ear. “That’s it, baby.”

It was the first thing she had really said to me.

I was glad when the water ran cold and returned my traitorous body to the faithful, one-woman man it now was.

Roxy called it a day, so we were allowed to dress and join the rest of the crew in the club where a catering crew had brought a buffet to scavenge. Leah was hopping all over the place, soaking in the unusual experience for all it was worth. “Isn’t it great, Jonah?” she said as she grabbed my hand.

“Who’s this?” Ariel asked as she sauntered over to where we stood.

“This is my sister, Leah,” I said. “Leah, this is Ariel Acardi.”

My sister rolled her eyes at me. “I know who she is,” she said before she held out a hand. “It’s very nice to meet you.”

Despite her strict ‘no touching’ rule, Ariel immediately reached for a hug. “It’s so nice to meet you, too, Leah,” she said. “Would you like a photo?”

“Yeah!” Leah said, her eyes wide.

Ariel withdrew her phone and knelt down to take an enthusiastic selfie with my sister. She took another one as she kissed her cheek, which made Leah giggle. “I’ll send it to your brother,” she said with a grin. “You make sure he gives it to you.”

“I will!” she said before she rattled off my phone number to the young diva before I could stop her. Ariel sent the photos to my phone instantly.

“You next,” she said as she reached up to take a photo of us together, whispering in my ear, “smile like you’re getting paid for it,” into my ear. I obliged and she used the opportunity to kiss me, which startled me so much I jumped back. She giggled before grabbing Leah’s hand to bond over the shrimp cocktail.

Gay grabbed me and pulled me aside. “I know it’s a pain in the ass, Jonah, but those photos are what jumpstarted your career. Indulge her. She’s trying to help you.”

“Why?” I asked. “What’s in it for her?”

“That’s up for you to decide,” she said frankly before she followed Ariel and Leah. I sighed before I grabbed an appetizer.

“You’ve certainly made the big time,” Jacinda said as she refilled one of the plates. “Didn’t I tell you?”

Despite our regretful evening together, we had fallen into a fairly cordial work relationship. She was Gay’s right hand, so I couldn’t really avoid her. “You did,” I said before I grabbed another appetizer from the new plate.

“Imagine how much farther you’d get if you didn’t have anything weighing you down.”

My eyes flashed. “What does that mean?”

“Don’t shoot the messenger, okay? It’s just easier to stay unencumbered. That way you can sneak away with nights with people like Ariel. She scratches your back, you scratch hers… you’re part of the club.”

“I’m not interested in scratching anything,” I told her.

She leaned against the table. “Listen, cowboy. This ain’t the country. This world comes with new rules. Play the game, you win. Refuse, you don’t. If you want proof of that, look around you and see who isn’t here on the biggest day in this club’s career.” She left me with that.

With a sigh I went to find Leah. It was time to head home.

The next day the hotel scenes promised to be extremely steamy, so Roxy didn’t want me to have any distractions that could pull me out of the scene. That meant anyone “non-essential,” i.e. Leah, couldn’t hang around and watch, forcing my Mama to take a personal day so she could stay at home with her.

The suite that Roxy chose was almost identical to the one where I had declared my love for Lacy, and it had been prepped well with dozens of candles and scattered petals from her signature white and plum roses. Roxy declared that Ariel and I would simulate making love, which made me balk instantly. Gay took me aside. “Just get through it, Jonah. It’s an illusion. It’s not real.”