Southern Rocker Boy (Southern Rockers Book 1) (24 page)

She was as responsive as she had been on our regrettable one-night-stand. I tore off her shirt and kissed my way down her body until she was gasping out loud. “Oh, cowboy,” she murmured. “I have missed you.”

“Yeah?” I asked as I inched back up her body, touching all the right spots to make her purr.

“Yeah,” she said before she licked her lips. “Remember how good it was between us?” she said.

“I remember a lot of things about that first time. You like being spanked,” I said as I demonstrated with a swat. “You gave great head. And you also tried to tell me about Lacy’s sordid history.”

She rolled her eyes. “Please. We finally got rid of her. Can we please not mention her name?”

I pinned her to the sofa with my weight, pulling her arms over her head and holding her prone. “I’m afraid I have to. You see, everyone has something to say but they never really say it.” I focused on her mouth. “And no one is going to get what they want out of me until they fucking say it. Not my music. Not my heart. And not my dick,” I added, grinding against her to show her what she was missing.

She suppressed a gasp before her chin jutted. “I’m not telling you anything.”

“Fine,” I chirped as I lifted up and away from her, leaving her aroused and unsatisfied. “Suit yourself.”

She sat up. “Are you fucking kidding me? After all these months you finally come back to me but it’s to talk about
her
?”

“No, I came here to fuck your brains out,” I lied easily. They wanted a fucking illusion, I’d give it to them. “But I’m tired of all the secrets and lies. You tell me the truth or I’m out that door right now and you’ll never see me at Southern Nights again.”

“Bullshit,” she said. “You can’t leave. You have a contract with Mama…”

Her eyes opened wide as she realized what she had done. It was the missing piece of the puzzle.

“You’re her daughter,” I said, connecting the dots. And I knew I was on point by the way her eyes widened. “The musical family. Which means… you were part of the backup singers in the band. Which means…,” I said as the revelation kicked me right in the gut. “Tony Paul is your brother. And Gay’s son.”

She scrambled from the sofa. “Get the fuck out of my house. I’m not telling you a goddamned thing!”

“You already did. That was why you and Gay sided with the deadbeat dad instead of your fellow woman. You were the one who was jealous that she was getting a share of the spotlight.”

“She trapped my brother!” she screeched. “Did she tell you that?”

“No, you did. And Gay did. But how trapped can he be when he flew the coup a long ass time ago?”

“She ruined everything,” she snapped. “He was going to be huge.”

“As huge as I’m supposed to be?” I countered.

She laughed. “Jonah. Poor deluded Jonah. You still don’t get it, do you?”

“Spell it out for me.”

She stood and faced me with an evil look on her face. “You were just another part of the plan. You’re no artist. You’re not a singer. You’re just some poor dumb hick from the sticks that Mama could fool with thirty pieces of silver. All we had to do was create a distraction where you got more famous than she did and she’d run away from the club and every single Hollis in Austin. Soon, she’ll be out of Austin entirely. You were the one who drove Lacy away, forcing her to get out of music and support her own damn bastard so my brother can come home.”

If it were the kind of man to strike a woman, I’d have backhanded her into next week.

“He’s the star,” she spat. “You’re just a puppet singing someone else’s songs.”

I slammed out of her apartment and took a taxi home.

I didn’t care if I ever saw Southern Nights again.

I silenced the phone whenever Gay tried to call me that week. I wanted nothing to do with her or that club. I tried to call Lacy, but she wasn’t returning my calls. Who could blame her? I had aligned myself with her enemies without even knowing it.

Of course I would have known about it had she entrusted me with it.

As it turned out, we both dropped the ball. And we’d buried any chances we had at sustaining our passionate love affair because of it.

“I don’t know what to do, Mama,” I told her that Thursday when she got home from work. I spilled the whole ghastly tale and she had listened quietly without judgment. When I presented her the $10,000 check, she stared at it for a long time.

Finally she said, “No amount of money is worth your soul, Jonah. You cash this check and you will never forgive yourself.”

I nodded. I knew she was right. “But we need it.”

“We’ll figure something out,” she assured as she covered my hand with hers. “The way I see it, you made it work once, you can make it work again.”

My eyes met hers. “You really think so?”

She smiled. “I’ve always thought you could do whatever it was you wanted to do. If it’s music, then I say go for it. You don’t need Gay. Call Graham Baxter yourself.”

I glanced at my watch. It was three-thirty California time. What did I have to lose?

I suspected I’d end up leaving a message that I’d chew every fingernail down to the quick as I waited to see if it was returned. Surprisingly, I got straight through.

“Jonah,” Graham said. “I’m surprised to hear from you. Have you talked to Gay?”

I rolled my eyes. “Sort of. That’s why I wanted to talk to you.”

“What’s up?”

Again I spilled my tale, telling him about Jasper Carrington and Ariel, and about the hush money. I left out anything about Lacy, because I didn’t want to shade his opinion of her. If he decided to take me on, I eventually wanted him to consider Lacy for a contract as well.

We couldn’t be together, I understood that now. But I owed this to her.

“Needless to say, I want a change of representation,” I said.

“Mmhmm,” he murmured thoughtfully. “But you are under a contract until, what? Next May?”

“Yes,” I affirmed as I thought about that damnable piece of paper tying me to Gay and to Southern Nights.

“It’s not a record contract, though, right?” I confirmed that it wasn’t. He was thoughtful for a moment. “I’d love to put you on the new season of
Fierce
,” he said. “But that starts filming in a few months for a January debut.”

“
Fierce
?” I echoed. I wasn’t sure I wanted to compete on a televised talent show, especially one heralded for giving those a little more disadvantaged a chance. Clearly I had several positives going for me that someone, like a wounded veteran with a fake leg, wouldn’t have.

“The way I see it there’s only one downside to representing you, and that’s experience.
Fierce
has become a proven training ground. You don’t even need to win to launch a career. But it will test your mettle. I think it’d be a perfect fit, given your backstory.”

I glanced down at the $10,000 check. “So if I could get out of this contract with Gay, when would you need me in California?”

“You’d have to go through the audition process, like the other contestants,” he said. “You’d have to send in a performance video to be evaluated. If the judges like what they see, they’ll bring you to L.A. for the live auditions we tape for the show, starting early November. If you make it to the live shows, those begin mid-January, at which point we’ll relocate you to the house you’ll share with the other contestants by the first of the year.”

“And my family?” I said. I wouldn’t leave my Mama or Leah behind.

“Would become our family,” Graham promised. He detailed the salary I could expect as a cast-member on a televised program, which would comfortably pay for my family’s living expenses for the several months it took to compete on the show. Graham had a list of places that offered short-term leases in corporate housing, specifically for the families.

It was almost seven by the time I got off the phone with him, armed with a plan for my future. I drove myself to Southern Nights for what I hoped would be my last night there.

I walked right to Gay’s office, where she was on the phone furiously trying to find a replacement act for the evening, given that she hadn’t heard from me.

I wondered momentarily if she called Lacy, begging her to come back after she cut her free. But I didn’t ask as I planted myself in the chair opposite her desk.

“Where the hell have you been?” she exploded as she slammed down the phone. “We open the door in two hours.”

“Honestly I wasn’t going to come back at all,” I told her. “Not after Jacinda told me the truth about Tony Paul.”

“Look, Jonah, that was all a huge misunderstanding…,” she started but I wasn’t having it.

“It was all bullshit,” I clarified. “You wanted to punish Lacy and you did. Congratulations.”

“This isn’t about Lacy,” she snapped as she tossed my contract in front of me. “This is about you and me, honey.”

“You’re right,” I said. “It is.” I threw the check from Carrington Entertainment onto her desk. Her eyes narrowed as she glared at me. “You said that by cashing that check I understood that I wasn’t to talk about my non-relationship with Ariel publicly. As you can see, I haven’t cashed it yet.”

“Is that a threat?” she asked.

“It’s a promise,” I corrected. “You let me out of my contract, today, or I go straight to Miles O’Rourke and tell him every dirty detail.” I smiled evilly. “Just remember. I learned how to play this game watching you, Gay.”

She leaned back in her chair as she evaluated me thoughtfully. “You better be real careful who you cross swords with, son. I’ve been in this business a lot longer than you. You can’t afford to burn any bridges.”

I shrugged. “I’m just some dumb hick playing rock star. I’m not the one with anything to lose. But if I spill the beans about Jasper Carrington, you can kiss any future contract with your precious Tony Paul goodbye.”

She pursed her lips. “Looks like I underestimated you, sugar,” she mused. She sat up and thumbed through some files in her desk. She pulled a folder out and opened it, withdrawing a piece of paper, which she signed and slid across the desk to me.

The document dissolved our relationship from the date signed, which she simply inked in with today’s date. I glanced back up at her. “How long have you had this?”

“From the beginning,” she admitted freely. “It was always the plan. I just needed to get rid of Lacy first. Imagine my surprise when both Jasper and Graham wanted you.”

I nodded. “Thanks for your honesty. A little late, but appreciated nonetheless.” I signed my part and handed it back to her before rising to leave. Just as I reached the door she called me back. I turned to see her waving the check at me.

“Didn’t you forget something?” she asked.

I walked back to the desk and took the check from her hand.

“Do yourself a favor and cash it, Jonah. You’ll need it to get the hell out of Austin. I can personally guarantee you that neither you nor your mother will get another job here again.”

“Is that what you told Lacy?” I asked her.

“Yes,” she answered with zero remorse.

“I’m sure Cody appreciates that, Grandma.”

“I have no grandchild,” she stated.

“You’re right,” I told her. “And that’s your loss.”

I left her with that.

The next day I drove Leah and myself to that old corner of our old homestead. She used my camera to film me as I sang the Dylan tune, “
To Make You Feel My Love
,” with nothing more than my acoustic guitar. I sang it for the woman I gave my heart to months before in this very spot. I didn’t know that was what I was doing at the time, but there was no doubt about it now. I wore my heart on my sleeve as I sang, pouring all the emotion I could into my song.

There were tears in Leah’s eyes when I finished. “That’s the best I’ve ever heard you sing,” she said.

I smiled. That meant a lot coming from my biggest fan. “Let’s hope the judges think so too,” I said. I didn’t bother editing. I didn’t even watch it before I sent the video straight to Graham.

As predicted, Mama lost her job at TX Hill Country Plastic and Steel within the week. During her 120-day evaluation, she was nailed on some bogus charges about hours lost. Turned out with all the time she lost with Leah being so sick when she was first hired, the day she had to take off so that I could shoot the video took her over the limit allowed in her probationary period. I knew instantly that Gay had everything to do with that. She was a powerhouse in Austin, who was on the Chamber of Commerce and hobnobbed with important and powerful people in the city and beyond.

I finally cashed the check because I had no other choice. Everything I had made up until then only cleared the ledger. We needed the extra cash to move. Whether I got the gig on
Fierce
or not, it was clear we couldn’t stay in Austin. It was Mama’s idea to go for broke and move to California. We found a place in Orange County, with our very own citrus trees in the backyard. Mama picked up work cleaning houses so that she could work during the day while Leah was at school. I found work in clubs around the area so that I worked at night.

Leah loved her new school and her new classmates. Her health even improved with the change of climate. I almost wept with joy when she stepped foot into the majestic Pacific for the first time, her arms wide open to Mother Nature at last.

But each one of us waited with bated breath until that October, when the judges made their final picks for all the contestants brought back for the second audition.

Finally the call came. Though we had set our whole life up in expectation of it, it still seemed unreal. I knew that I was starting my music career over again from scratch. The minute I had walked out of Southern Nights, another pretty boy took my place as the possible arm candy for Ariel. All my social media accounts were deleted and the fickle public, that had embraced me so quickly, forgot I even existed within a few months.

I was a newbie again, learning to play the game from new, hopefully honest, players. I had to admit this held a lot more promising than some dank bar as I drove onto the back lot in Burbank where the show was filmed. Huge boxy buildings were painted with images from the show, including past contestants like Jace Riga and Jordi Hemphill.

I felt out of place from the moment I stepped in the door. Graham was quick to welcome me, introducing me to the lovely lady at his side. “This is Shannon McKenna. She’s another producer on our show.”

I shook her hand. “It’s so nice to meet you, ma’am,” I drawled and she twinkled at me.

“Country boy, huh?” she asked. I nodded. I would never be ashamed of that again. “So is my husband,” she winked before they led me to the auditorium in front of a bare black stage. “Don’t be nervous. Just go out there and own it and you’ll do fine.”

“Thank you, ma’am,” I said as I filed in behind them to the crowded audience. Each person wore a name tag like I did, so I knew they were fellow contestants. There were at least a hundred. My stomach dropped. Shannon didn’t make me feel any better when she added that these were the first of the week’s auditions, which meant more singers would be coming.

I would have to compete, just on my talent alone, for a spot on the show.

Everything was riding on it.

“There are refreshments back stage,” she said. “Feel free to help yourself.”

I nodded. I was suddenly parched from nerves and desperately needed a bottle of water. Several other contestants milled around the spread of fresh food and rows of beverages. I would have grabbed some grub, but my stomach had tangled itself into a knot. Instead I grabbed a bottle of water instead.

“Jonah?” a female voice asked from behind.

I spun around. Her lovely face hadn’t changed in all the months we had been apart. “Courtney?” I said.

She reached for a hug and of course I wouldn’t deny her. I lifted her right off the ground. “What are you doing here?” I asked.

She giggled. “Same as you,” she said. I set her on her feet. “But I have to admit I’m shocked to see you here. I thought you had hit the big time in Austin.”

I made a face. “Long story,” I dismissed. “But what are you doing here? I didn’t know you wanted to sing.”

She chuckled. “Turns out there’s only one thing I’m really good at, apparently. A couple of friends insisted I audition. I really didn’t think I’d make it this far.”

I gave her a warm smile. “I’m not surprised,” I said. “I’ve heard you sing.”

She chuckled and I knew both of us were thinking about that simple white church set atop rolling green pastures. “This is certainly a far cry from that, isn’t it?”

I nodded as I looked around. “I keep asking myself what the hell I’m doing here.”

“Don’t shortchange yourself, Jonah. You’re more talented than you know. I mean obviously, right? Otherwise you wouldn’t be here.”