Authors: Jo Cotterill
A loud whistle from the back breaks through your thoughts and you smile even more â Rubes was teaching J how to whistle yesterday, and there is no mistaking a Reuben-style whistle. The curtain begins to close, even though the crowd is still applauding and cheering like mad. You are deliriously happy. You turn to Chris. You can't control yourself any longer.
To hell with it!
you think.
You throw your arms around his neck and kiss him deeply in front of the whole cast. He is tentative at first, but then he gives in. The cast momentarily stop jumping and screaming when they see that you two are locked in an embrace, then whoop and cheer again as if nothing had happened. You part from Chris, and catch Reuben's eye. He shrugs in a “It-was-such-good-gossip-I-had-to-tell-everyone” kind of way. You smile and blow him a kiss. Nothing can spoil your mood.
Everyone starts to troop off the stage in a crowd, cheering and jumping around as they go. You're fairly sure your final kiss was hidden from the audience by the curtain, but now you feel a pang of uncertainty. You know that if your parents had seen you kiss Chris, you would never,
ever
leave the house again. You can practically hear your mother's voice screaming at you in your head. “
He's one of
them
! How could you be so stupid? That boy is
â”
You let the crowd drown out her imaginary voice and let go of Chris, but keep your hands entwined with his. You are buzzing with excitement. You have to do something to get this feeling out of your system. A wicked smile crosses your face.
“Let's do something,” you murmur.
Chris's eyebrows rise.
“What do you mean?” he says, with the air of someone preparing themselves for the worst.
Your eyes shine as you spin round and run off towards the dressing rooms. Chris catches up with you and manages to pull you round to face him.
“What?!” he laughs.
You push him into a nearby room, follow him in and shut the door behind you. It's pitch-black and cramped. The cleaners' closet. You smile.
It doesn't matter.
You run your hand over the wall, searching for the light switch, and switch it on. You look at Chris with a wry grin.
You can smell him; like a mixture of Hugo Boss and his own unique musky, sexy smell that makes your heart race. He leans against the wall and you lean into him, kissing him passionately for a few seconds then pull away. He takes his weight off the wall to kiss you again, but you push him back and put your hand over his lips.
“Let's leave,” you burst out, the words tumbling out in a rush. “Let's go to the forest and make a fire â stay up and watch the dawn together. Let's go and get lost. Let's go to the bus station and catch the next one that leaves⦠I don't care! I just want to get away.”
Chris looks at the floor; his eyebrows scrunched in concentration. This wasn't the response you were expecting. The soaring high from the play starts to fade, trickling away from you like sand in your hands. You turn from him, confused.
“I can just go by myself. You don't
have
to come if you don't wantâ”
“The station,” he whispers. “We can go as far as we want. Get out of here for a while. Go to the beach â camp out under the stars, see the sun rise over the horizon?” His face turns serious. “We'll leave tonight. Now. Just you and me⦔
You kiss him again, and whisper in his ear.
“What are we waiting forâ¦?”
He takes your hand, switches off the light, and pulls you out of the closet. You shut the door behind you and you both run down the corridor, Chris leading the way.
Outside your dressing room, he pulls you close and whispers to you, stroking your hair. “No one can see you. If we're going, we have to get out before our parents find us. If we don't get out before then we're screwed.”
You nod. “We'll take the back way through the school so nobody sees us, right?”
“Yeah,” he answers, turning in the direction of his own room. “Meet me in the girls' toilets near the gym.” His eyes light up and his smile grows bigger. “Grab your stuff and we can get the hell out. I'll be waiting.”
You nod. “Two minutes.”
He kisses you softly and you almost forget about the plan. Almost. You push him away, grinning. “Go!”
You don't watch him leave, but quickly walk into the room, gathering up your things and shoving them into a bag. There is a sound from behind you.
You spin around to see Maddy leaning against the door. You are frozen in shock. You'd forgotten you weren't supposed to be seen.
Especially
not by your sister. Maddy walks over to you and stands just in front of you. Her eyes are glittering with anger.
This is not gonna be good.
“What IN HELL are you doing, Jen?!” she hisses at you. “Chris BANNER?! Have you lost your MIND?!”
You frown. “What do you mean? It was only a play, for Christ's sake⦔
She grabs your arm and pushes you violently into a chair.
“
Don't you bloody dare try to pull that on me!
”
You are paralyzed with fear. Your sister is usually so close to you, so understanding, never this ⦠this, well, vicious. Her pretty face is contorted with fury.
“I saw the two of you kissing, just before the curtain closed. And some kids in the corridor were talking about you and
him
as I walked past. Fancy me coming here, thinking that my little sister is the most wonderful thing on the planet, to find out that she is actually a fake and a traitor! Did you know Mum and Dad made it in the end and had to sit out there, watching
that
?
How dare you do this?!
”
You stand to face her. She knows now. There's no point in denying it. You are shaking with anger. This is pathetic.
“How dare I?” you ask. “HOW DARE I?! I LOVE HIM, MADDY! I
DARE
BECAUSE HE'S SWEET AND FUNNY AND KIND AND YOU KNOW WHAT? HE LOVES ME.
HE. LOVES. ME!
THIS STUPID FEUD IS DRIVING ME CRAZY!”
The anger boils up inside of you and you can't stop screaming. You feel as if you are about to break. Your hands are balled up in fists and your hair is falling out of its bun, but you aren't noticing. All you can focus on is the short-sightedness of your sister.
“WHY CAN'T YOU SEE THAT PEOPLE ARE HUMAN AND WE NEED TO JUST FORGET?! YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HIM! YOU'RE SUCH A BITCH!”
Maddy's hand suddenly pushes you hard. You stumble backwards, staring at her in a shocked silence. She is shaking too, livid with hurt pride.
“I'm sorry,” she says in a rough whisper. “But you needed to come back to your senses. You don't mean any of that. And he doesn't love you.” She looks at you with a mix of pity and loathing. “He's just saying that to humiliate you. To trick you.” She moves closer to you, getting right into your face, dropping her voice as she gets nearer and nearer. “Then, when you trust him with your life, he will destroy you.
Inch. By. Inch.
Just like his dear old dad.”
You push yourself off the wall, so that your nose and Maddy's are almost touching.
“Believe what you want. Chris isn't like that. Go to hell.”
You push her aside and run out of the room without any of your things, towards the toilets.
You hear her shout after you, “
How could you do this to your family?
”
You try to ignore it, but your heart feels like it's about to shatter.
Chris. I need Chris. Where are you?
You run through the crowded cast corridor. It doesn't matter if people see you now. You just have to get there as fast as you can, pushing people out of the way as hot tears fall down your face. You're nearly at the turning to the toilets when someone grabs your arm. You spin around to pull your arm away, but you catch sight of the person's face. It's Rubes. His eyes are full of concern.
“What's wrong?” His expression turns angry. “Don't tell me Banner's turned on you? I'll kill him.”
You shake your head madly, but he keeps hold of your wrists.
“No!” you choke. “No ⦠I need to see him ⦠Maddy, she ⦠I⦔ you stutter, and feel a fresh wave of panic, nausea and fear wash over you. You force yourself to calm down. “I have to go to speak to Chris. Now.”
You turn to go back to the toilets, but Rubes is still holding you. “Where are you going? He's not in there.”
Your hair falls out of its last clips.
“What?”
Your voice catches painfully in your throat. Maddy's words echo in your head.
Then, when you trust him with your life, he will destroy you. Inch. By. Inchâ¦
You try to shake the cold band of doubt that is contracting around your heart, but it throbs painfully as you try to draw a breath.
“He's not in there,” he says quickly.
You raise your eyebrows. “How do
you
know he's not in the
girls'
bathroom?”
“'Cause I just saw him a minute ago. His dad was escorting him out of the door. He looked pretty mad⦔
You pull away and sprint back along the corridor to the main hall, where the exit is. People are milling about; waiting for friends and family to come out. They stare at your costume. You push your way through the doors to the outside. It's dark â the light from the hall illuminates the grass area outside the school. Goosebumps rise on your skin from the sudden change in temperature. You don't even notice that it's raining. You are soaked within seconds. As you stare across the car park, looking for the Banner car, something catches the light across the busy road. A car door. A fair man, well-built, with a sharp haircut and stiff walk that must be military, with a blonde teenage boy. They look like they are arguing, and even though you are too far away to hear what they are saying, you know that they could only be fighting about one thing. You. The man begins to force the boy into the car. You start to run.
You push through the gate and on to the pavement. Your heart is in your mouth.
I have to get to himâ¦
A car goes past and splashes you. Your Juliet dress is dripping and you are soaked to the skin. It feels so heavy. The rain is driving into your face, but all you can see is Chris. He's still so far away, on the other side of the road, refusing to get into the car.
“
Chris!
” You cry out his name, hoping he can hear you over the torrential downpour. You step into the road, getting ready to run across it. Time slows. Chris looks up and sees you. You take another step into the road and look up at his face again. But he's not looking at you. His dad has frozen too and they are both staring, horrified, at something to your right. You take another step, confused, and turn to see what they are looking at. A sudden brightness overtakes the dark, blinding you. You don't even have time to shade your eyes. You just stand, transfixed with horror, as you hear Chris's strangled voice cry your name.
“
JEN!
”
The last thing you feel is your body hitting the bonnet of the car.
Everything is black.
Ethan has run so far he can't keep on running any longer. He stops and doubles over, coughing and spluttering to try to get his breath back, his mind going into overdrive now that he has stopped concentrating on running.
So many thoughts, so many memoriesâ¦
Suddenly he realizes that he's made a stupid, stupid mistake.
“What the
hell
am I
doing
?”
Ethan spins around and moves faster than he ever has before, back to the barracks. The same thought keeps drumming through his head.
How â could â I â be â so â stupid?
The night is dark, but a streetlamp lights the path ahead. He reaches up to wipe the sweat out of his eyes, momentarily blocking his vision. There's someone further on, walking in the pool of light.
“Will! I'm sorry!”
The boy looks around. His bruised face is a mixture of hurt and anger, and his eyes are gleaming with fury.
“You know, I've always known that you were the stronger one.” He looks straight at Ethan, his accusing gaze never failing. “But I always thought that you and me were like Batman and Robin, and I told myself that you couldn't do it without me. I thought that we were like brothers, real brothers.” He holds up his right hand and glares at his thumb. Suddenly his face goes blank and his voice hollow. “But more than that, I thought we were friends.”
“We
are
â”
“Then how could you
do
that?” he shouts, his rage bursting out. “How could you just walk away? How the hell could you just leave me toâ” He looks down, not wanting to finish his sentence, then takes his stare back up to Ethan's eyes. “I needed you,” he says quietly. “But you left. You left me to them. You chose them over me. That doesn't make you a friend. It makes you a traitor.”
Neither boy moves for a second.
Will looks directly at Ethan, the stare making him feel stripped down, embarrassed and guiltier than he has ever felt in his life. And alone. So alone. Ethan can't speak.
“You made me believe soldiers were honourable, not bullies like my dad. So much for your honour. I will always remember what you've done,” Will says quietly, “and I'll make sure even my children know what friendship means to a Banner, so they never think of trusting a liar like you. I will never, ever forgive you.'
With one final glance, Will walks away. Ethan watches his best friend leave, and knows that he will never be coming back.