“I know.”
“Why did you leave last time?” He had to know why she hadn’t
stayed with him. “I had already promised I wouldn’t take you, what were you
afraid of?” He rolled onto his side, propping his head on his hand. He wanted
to see her face, her eyes. He grabbed her hand in his other one. He needed to
touch her.
She blinked, looking confused by his question. “I wasn’t
afraid. You left… No, you ran out of the room.” She turned her head away, her
red cheeks showing her embarrassment. “I thought…” she took a deep breath and
blurted, “I thought I’d done something wrong.”
Jake froze, his hand squeezing hers. He knew he was probably
hurting her, but he was trying to tamp down the anger. He was so stupid. She
was an innocent. It had been so long since he'd been with someone with as
little experience as she had that he didn't remember. It would never occur to
her why he’d left so quickly, why he’d had to get out of there. How could he be
such an idiot? He finally managed to get words out, although they sounded a
little deeper than he would have liked. “You didn’t do anything wrong, not even
close,” was all he could manage.
Now she rolled over onto her side, looking at his face.“Then
I don’t understand. I thought, maybe, I was too…”
When she didn't seem like she was going to continue, Jake
prodded, "Too what?"
“Too, ummm, eager.”
“God, you really are innocent aren’t you?” He put his hand
on her cheek, lifting her chin to look right into her eyes. “You were perfect,
absolutely perfect. That’s why I left.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Jess, you make me crazy. Seriously crazy. Even now, lying
here, talking to you, I’m harder than hell, and I haven’t even touched you.” He
saw her eyes go wide and glance down to his groin. He felt his erection jump.
“Feeling you, your body clenching around my finger, I almost embarrassed
myself, coming in my jeans like a damn teenager. I had to go…relieve some
pressure…before I broke my promise and pushed inside you.”
Her silver eyes sparked fire. “You went to…” her voice
trailed off.
“Masturbate? Yes.” She looked shocked. “Would it surprise
you to know that I’ve done that very same thing every damn day since you got
here? Including last night and again this morning?” Her surprised eyes got even
wider. He laughed, pulled her close to him, her head resting on his arm. He
thrust his hips against her. “It obviously hasn’t helped.”
She could feel his erection pressing against her and her
body rushed to catch up, moisture pooling between her legs, her breasts getting
heavy and tight. She looked up, eyeing his mouth, her tongue peeking out to
lick her lips. She heard him groan.
“Do you think of me when you please yourself, Jess?”
She shook her head no. When his expression turned dark, she
realized he’d misunderstood. “No, I don’t masturbate.”
He froze again. “Ever?”
“No, never. I never really understood the point. I told you,
I had never really wanted anyone until you. Sex, even by myself, seemed
pointless.”
“So, the first time you ever had an orgasm was…”
“With you.”
Jake groaned again, rolling away. He got up and started
pacing.
“Please stop walking away from me. I’m finding I don’t
particularly like it.”
Jake turned, smiling ruefully. “I need a little control, a
little perspective here, Jess. You’re even more innocent than I thought you
were. We need to take this slowly. And that’s gonna be hard for me. It's been a
long time.” He walked over and lay back down by her, a little farther away.
She turned, snuggling into his chest. She didn’t want to
take anything slowly, but maybe he was right. She really didn’t know him all
that well. “So, tell me more about your family, your childhood.
Jake took a deep breath. After a minute, he started talking
again. He ran his hands through her hair while he told her all about his
parents, growing up on the ranch, Marsha. “How did you and Cody get to be
friends? You guys seem like total opposites.”
She felt his smile against her hair. “We are. Believe it or
not, Cody used to be a lot bigger than me. When we were in second grade, I was
the littlest kid in class. The biggest kid in class was Hank. He was, of
course, the class bully. He and I got into it one day after school. God only
knows what it was about. Cody came to my rescue, punched Hank right in the
face, giving him a bloody nose. We all got detention for a week. Somewhere in
there, Cody and I became friends.” After a deep breath, he asked, “So, tell me
about your family?”
Jess immediately tensed and tried to redirect him. “I’d
rather hear more about you and Cody. He seems like the kind to raise a little
hell. Did you join him, in your younger years?” She tried smiling at him,
knowing it was stiff.
Thankfully, he let it slide, for now, and regaled her with
stories of bar fights, school fights. Crazy horse rides, crazier women. Jake
had even gone on the rodeo circuit with Cody for a year. After a little while
had passed, she started to relax against him once more. Then he asked again.
“Jess, tell me about your family? Please?”
She sighed. She knew she’d have to tell him, but she really
didn’t want to talk about them. She didn’t want to let them in this place. This
ranch was a haven for her, somewhere she could just be herself. She didn’t want
them
here
.
“They’re not bad. Not really. I had everything, more than
everything, growing up. And, in their own way, they love me. But, it was
nothing like your childhood. My family comes with expectations. Lots of them.
And I didn’t fit. Not any part of it. I didn’t look right, too curvy, too much
hair, and then, my eyes…no one else in my family has eyes this color, so my dad
always wondered if I was really his. But we couldn’t talk about that. My whole
family is long and lean, very GQ. And then there was me. They’re very composed,
very calm. As you’ve seen, I’m prone to displays of temper. I liked to play in
the dirt, run our horses, ride bareback through the woods, not in competitions.
I think I’m just a disappointment to them. And it got worse when I went to
college. I was supposed to finish school, come home and get married.” She felt
Jake’s arm tighten around her shoulder. “Not to anyone specific, I wasn’t
engaged or anything. That was just what was expected. I wanted a career. And
not even an acceptable career. If I’d wanted to deal in antiques, or take
business classes to help my husband, or even be an interior designer, that
would have been different. But, to be an architect…well, that’s just one step
up from construction worker, and definitely not acceptable. They’re fine. Good
people. I’m just not like them.”
* * * * *
Jake wondered if she knew how much was revealed in her
words. All of a sudden, the contacts, the horrible clothes, all the
insecurities made sense.
“I like it here. I’m comfortable here. I can just be myself,
and that’s okay. I don’t want to talk about them anymore, okay?”
She was clearly uncomfortable, having told him all that she
had. He wanted to see her relax and smile again. It was time for a new topic.
“Okay. Can I say, I really like that I can see your eyes
now. I’m glad you threw the contacts away.” He leaned and kissed her nose.
“Me too. I figured everyone would ask stupid questions, or
comment on how weird they are, but no one has said anything. I forget about it
most of the time, although I’m still shocked when I catch sight of myself in
the mirror.”
There was no way Jake was going to tell her that he had
threatened their lives if anyone asked her about it. He strongly suspected that
Mike had done the same to his crew. He liked seeing her emerge. He wanted her
to be comfortable here. It was becoming more and more important to him,
although he refused to look too closely at why. “Your eyes aren’t weird, Jess.
They’re beautiful. And I love that I can see what you’re feeling.” He leaned in
again, this time kissing her lips, softly, gently. There was no way he could
prepare for his response or hers.
All of a sudden, the fire raged between them. He shouldn’t
be surprised, it happened every time he touched her, but the intensity still
startled him. He grabbed her, sliding her body on top of his so he could feel
her pressing against him.
She wiggled up, slipping her hands into his hair as she
thrust her tongue in his mouth. She dropped her knees down beside his hips,
bringing her wet heat tight against his erection. Jake groaned, thrusting his
hips up to match her movements. He’d never had such mixed emotions about an
article of clothing before, but right now he wasn’t sure if he loved or hated
her jeans. He desperately wanted to rip them off and bury himself inside her, but
he knew he needed that barrier. Her first time would not be rushed, it would
not be on a blanket in the woods. It would be romantic and he would have more self-control.
Somehow.
He thrust his hips against her again, then pulled her up his
body so he could feast on her breasts.
He closed his lips over her nipple, right through the fabric
of her shirt. It still wasn't enough.
Jake rolled her over, pulling her tank up and over her head
while he went. He pushed her bra down, in too much of a rush to actually remove
it. He bent his head to suckle her nipple, first one then the other, into his
mouth. He felt her hips rising to meet him in a motion as old as time. Her
responsiveness made him crazy. Desire filled every cell of his being. He felt
himself thrust his hips against her thigh. God, he was going to lose it. He
raised himself back up, pressing his mouth to hers, bringing them back core to
core. She wrapped her legs around his hips, pressing against him as she
whimpered. She twisted her hips again, then again, her pace increasing with her
need. He felt her cry against his mouth as she nipped at his lower lip.
“Jess, oh God, darlin’ you need to stop.” Jake groaned, his
hips thrusting against hers again, beginning to match her rhythm.
She cried out, “Aaahhh, yes. Please…”
He looked at her, knew she was close to orgasm, and he felt
his shaft pulse, throbbing with need. He was pressing so hard against his jeans
he thought he might break the zipper. He had to stop her before he came.
“Jess, honey,” he groaned, trying the pull her legs from
around his waist. “Please, stop…I’ll give you release. I promise… Just stop.”
His hips pressed against hers again.
“Oh, God, yes. Please Jake…harder.” She threw her head back,
so lost in passion, she couldn’t even hear him.
Seeing her like that, her eyes glazed over, was more than he
could take. His cock bulged, ready to burst. He would make her come and he
would pray for control. He pulled her thigh, adjusting the angle slightly, and
pressed his shaft directly against her center. She screamed and writhed against
him. He thrust again, and again, faster and faster. And she matched every
twist. Finally he felt her body tighten, every muscle preparing for release.
When she threw her head back and cried out, he felt her still as the contractions
began, her nails digging into his back. Still he pushed against her. When she
lifted her face and pressed her mouth against him for a long, deep tongue
dueling kiss, he lost the battle. He groaned, thrusting his hips against her,
hard. Once, twice, then his own orgasm ripped through his body. Jake felt the
waves pulse through him, spilling his seed in his jeans. He came harder than he
ever had.
After a few minutes, he rolled off her, pulling her with him
so she was still pressed against him, but lying beside him.
Jake knew he should be embarrassed, humiliated by what had
just happened to him. Yet, it just felt right. Natural that she could do that
to him. She felt so perfect in his arms. Later he would question this too,
question his response to her, but for now it was perfect. When he could finally
speak he asked, “Do I need to apologize?”
Jess laughed softly against his shoulder. “For what?”
He smiled. “For attacking you. I really hadn’t planned
that.”
“I know. Neither did I. Can I ask, ummm, did you…?”
She left it hanging there. He knew what she was asking, but
oddly, wanted to hear her say the words. “Did I what?” He smirked down at her
as he pulled back to see her face.
She turned beet red. “Did you…” she gulped, “…well, did
you
orgasm?” She looked straight into his face.
He could tell she was a little embarrassed, but not enough
to stay quiet. “Yes.” He couldn’t resist teasing her a little. “You made me
come, fully dressed. No one, not even as a horny teenager, has managed that. Do
you want to see the mess you made?”
He was smirking at her. All of a sudden her shyness was
gone. She stood up, walking with a little extra swing as she went to get her
tank top from where he’d thrown it. “Not unless you want me to make another
one.”
He laughed out loud. He couldn’t help it. She was amazing.
Truly amazing. He watched her tug her shirt back on, then come to sit next to
him again, this time sitting cross legged like a child. He couldn’t resist. He
sat up, crawling toward her, he took one hand, slid it between her legs,
palming her sex through her jeans. “Soon, Jess. Soon, I’ll be inside you, and
you’ll be writhing against me, begging for more.” He kissed her, a soft teasing
kiss. When he pulled back, he saw the fire back in her eyes.
She twisted her hips against his hand then met his eyes,
returning his gaze, heat for heat. “If I beg, so will you.” She grabbed the
back of his neck, pressed a long deep kiss, then let go and stood up. “Let’s
pack this up. I think we need to get back before someone sends out a search
party.”
Jake thought about her last comment on the ride home. He was
fairly certain she was right. He would end up begging, and it wouldn’t be long
before he did.