He wondered how his parents coped. He understood they worried over their young, but it was not until right then that he grasped the depth of their concern. He knew he would be apprehensive when his young took their first steps, because it meant they would eventually run through the halls of the palace, careening around corners, running into walls, tackling and playing, and possibly becoming injured. He knew he would worry about the acceptance they would receive from others, about the taunting and shoving, whether their playmates would be malicious or friendly. But he never thought about what would come before all of that. When his meme was pregnant, did his father lie in bed awake at night, afraid he would not be able protect her and their unborn young?
Here they were, Alpha only a couple weeks pregnant, being assailed by too many dangers to count. Dargon already lay injured. Alpha and the kits would not be safe until Zeus could return with them to Atlainticia. He even worried about Star Eater, Alpha's son. Did being a Marked, a part of an Alpha Trine, make him a father figure to Star Eater? Gods, he hoped not. Zeus sighed heavily. His family had grown so quickly, and he could not protect them properly.
Europa and Laeretes slowly approached him. The Monticore closed in, but made no hisses of warning. "Prince Zeus. We would be honored if you allowed us to transport Star Eater to your ship."
Star Eater was nearly as tall as Madux. Carrying him through the sand to the shuttle would be difficult at best. As much as he did not want to rely on them, the strength of the Feteine would be helpful. "Please speak to Prince Mestor and obtain his permission to dock in the shuttle bay."
"We have already acquired permission to be aboard," Europa replied. The four Feteine who had escorted the remaining V'Saar returned with the emissaries. At a nod from Europa, they laid hands on the V'Saar and with a plop and the displacement of air, three of the Feteine and the V'Saar disappeared.
Zeus sensed something press against his skin, as if an invisible wave washed over him and made his stomach roll with nausea. "What!" He choked on the word, reflexively reaching up to touch Alpha.
"We are fine,"
Alpha reassured him.
"That is how we travel when we are in small numbers. They leapt to the coordinates given to them by Prince Mestor. Laeretes will take Star Eater. If you so desire, I will transport you as well," Europa explained.
"I appreciate the offer, but no." Even if Dargon did not wait at the shuttle, and if he did not worry about Alpha or the kits, Zeus would not be quantum leaping anywhere—ever. It felt … wrong, somehow.
Europa paused, as if she expected him to give a different answer. He did not know much about the Feteine. They were unlike any race he had contact with. The recent events made him cautious. Maybe more cautious than necessary, but he could not ignore his distrust of their actions.
"If you do not mind, I would be honored if you would allow me to travel with you."
Zeus’s suspicions increased. He accepted Madux's hand up, using the action to delay his answer.
"Alpha, do you see it?"
Zeus thought maybe he read something more than he should into Europa's actions.
"I agree, she wants something. She watches us. We must be wary."
Zeus met her gaze, her eyes a brilliant blue and almost alive, almost human, for a being made of metal.
"As you wish," he replied.
Madux must have felt Zeus’s unease, for he did not move away once Zeus gained his feet. Nor did Madux usually claim Zeus’s elbow as an escort either, but Zeus was grateful for Madux's actions. It did not escape his notice that Europa eyed Madux's proprietary hold.
"Zeus, come. It is time to leave," Azaes called impatiently. He and Mestor stood next to the doorway with their guard of Monticore. Mestor glanced between Zeus and Europa, his tail lashing in agitation as he leaned over to whisper in Warlord Sohm'lan's ear. Blue, reptilian eyes narrowed as Sohm'lan turned his gaze towards Zeus. He was not the only suspicious Mar'Sani.
He gestured toward the door. "After you."
Europa's rubber-like lips pressed into a tight smile as she gave a brief bow.
The guards surrounded Zeus and Madux before they began to follow Europa out. Zeus glanced around, searching for a familiar gray-and-red plume of feathers. With growing alarm, he scanned his group once again.
"Madux, can you see Axis?" The healer's height meant he would see things Zeus did not.
Madux's lips twisted into a smirk. "Yes, he is with the Chimera, ahead of Prince Azaes and Prince Mestor. For two years, Axis has been aloof. He is friendly, but normally he keeps his own company. I do not recall him being this infatuated with anyone before."
Although curious about Madux’s meaning, Zeus did not bother to crane his neck to see. There would be no point; Madux was more than a head taller than he. However, it was a strange comment. Most Mar’Sani had a healthy respect for the Chimeras. Most did not approach them or brave their company.
They followed the red stone pathway winding through the white sand dunes. Threatening clouds rolled overhead, and Zeus could not help but feel the sky reflected his restrained emotions. Lightning flashed in their depths and highlighted the boiling white caps of the thunder clouds.
He was not the only one gazing at nature's display. Europa stared, and for the first time, the segmented plates of her face moved, transforming her cool blank mask into an expression of awe. Zeus glanced up again. Surely, she had seen a thunderstorm before? When he glanced back to her, she stared back at him with the same look of wonder on her pale mechanical face.
Alpha felt bloated, as if he were stretched too tight. It had been a very long time since he had experienced a day as stressful as this one. Once again, the V'Saar threatened all he held dear. Long ago, he made many vows after the loss of his loved ones. He worked hard to guarantee the galaxies on this side of the grid would never face the devastation or the heartbreak he and Zeta endured in a time he wished to forget.
Alpha-Zetamite. It had been a long, long time since he had been referred to thusly. How many lifetimes ago had he went by that name alone and felt pride without a twinge of sorrow? A thousand? Ten-thousand?
He and Zeta had been the first to rise to awareness, back in the beginning when there were no races, no species, no other life to be found. Together, they produced offspring: Star Eater, born first of the ancient race once called Ryo'Pardeep. Countless millennia passed, the cosmos grew, galaxies multiplied, he and Zeta drifting down different paths only to eventually end up together again. Drawn by two races, they integrated with them, knitted into a family once again.
He deeply loved his Ryo'Pardeep offspring, but when he found his bondmates, that was the first time he had felt whole. When he fell in love, he finally understood what he lacked. He and Zeta had been caretakers for so long that they knew no other way to live.
Living and loving were not the only lessons Jiann and Volante taught him. The day he found his beloveds in the queen's hive, he learned the concept of loss, sorrow, and marrow-eating fury. The V'Saar fled like sheep before him and Zeta. He gathered what was left of his family to him just in time for them to breathe their last.
Nothing—absolutely nothing contained his sorrow. He did not know how long the war continued, how long he allowed murderous rage to consume him until one day he woke numb, exhausted, and tired of a conflict that would not bring back his loved ones.
A treaty was offered to the queen. He, Zeta, and what was left of their young moved on to other galaxies, and Queen Isolt vowed to stay away. They devised the grid knowing full well that Queen Isolt would not be satisfied with the agreement. After enough time passed, she would forget the lessons of war. The Council of Neighn was formed for the coalition of races who signed the pact, swearing to maintain the grid, and live by certain interstellar rules.
When he and Zeta came across the crippled planets of the Dar Massaga, they offered their help to the dying race. Alpha thought himself to be forever broken, and yet the Dar Massaga people slowly taught him how to love again. He counted himself blessed to have a second chance at happiness. Unlike the bond he shared with Jiann and Volante, binding the three of them together in a Trine, linking their lives to his own and allowing them to experience his longevity, Alpha's involvement with the Dar Massaga meant he would outlive each partner to whom he became a symbiote. He accepted the limitation, because he loved the people and wanted to see them thrive and prosper again.
He and Zeta were only a small part of the Alpha-Zetamite, one being split into smaller pieces to become symbiotes. He knew of other Alpha-Zetamites who had once again found a Trine connection. At times, he either experienced extreme jealousy or joy for them, but never did he believe he would know that level of bonding again.
Until Zeus.
Now, with the V'Saar crossing the weak points in the grid, one faction sought to control the key and threatened his new-found happiness. The first children he had co-fathered in several millennia nestled within him. He had not chastised Zeus for worrying about their safety, because he too fretted over their small family unit. Never again would he hold his loved ones while their lives expired.
Zeus called his name, pulling him out of his ruminations. "You were not always the symbiote?"
Alpha felt chagrined. He did not realize his shields had lowered, allowing Zeus access to his thoughts. He had yet to share all of his past with Zeus and Dargon. However, he did not detect any negative emotions from Zeus: simply a curiosity and a bit of his own sorrow mirrored within Zeus, as if he shared Alpha's pain.
"No, my independence cost my bondmates their lives. If I had been with them, the V'Saar would not have been able to take them. The separation from me killed them just as much as what the V'Saar had done to them."
"Alpha, their deaths are not your fault."
Zeus’s soft mental whisper held a wealth of emotion Alpha wished he could withdraw from. He did not know if he would be able to continue the conversation without sweating tears.
As if Zeus understood Alpha's fragility, he made no further comments, merely petted Alpha with a soothing hand as they rounded the last sand dune to the landing platform cluttered with several shuttles waiting to transport them back to The Gorgon.
Zeus sped up. Alpha sensed his desire to see Dargon, the intensity matching his own. Zeus climbed into the shuttle and made his way to the stretcher secured to the wall. A thin, soft blanket covered Dargon's body to the chin. Zeus mumbled a thank you to the guard who offered him the seat at the head of the medical bed.
Sitting down, Zeus laid a hand on Dargon's upturned cheek. Alpha scanned Dargon's body, searching for anything Star Eater might have missed and discovered the newly-repaired nervous system working as it should. He did not understand how Dargon blocked the pain from the Qrxzl attack. From what he could see, the damage to both Dargon and Zeus had been extensive. Although their bond to him would have guaranteed their recovery eventually, he would be eternally grateful for Star Eater's assistance. The Qrxzl, on the other hand, owed his family reparations. Earlier, Zeus trusted Azaes to handle those negotiations. Alpha would wait and see what had come of them, fully expecting Azaes to show the Qrxzl no mercy. If he had learnt anything about the Mar’Sani, it was that they protected their own, responding viciously to any who threatened family safety.
"What do you see? Will he recover?"
How fortunate he and Dargon were to find Zeus.
"As far as I can tell, he will make a full recovery."
Zeus exhaled loudly and slouched back, almost melting into the chair. He sensed Zeus’s yearning for home, even though his lover rarely mentioned it. Apparently, Mar'Sani were never able to stay away from the Waters of Poseidon for long.
The seats filled quickly, with the Monticore claiming those closest to Zeus after they had donned the weapons they left aboard the shuttle. Axis climbed into the pilot's seat. It did not escape Alpha's notice that one set of Chimera triplets took the seats immediately behind the pilot's chair. Madux sat in the copilot's chair and began running through the pre-flight checklist.
Prince Mestor appeared in the doorway of the shuttle, his gaze scanning the interior until it rested on Zeus. Zeus had closed his eyes, yet he knew the moment Mestor peered into the shuttle. For being adopted, Alpha mused, Zeus’s bond to his siblings seemed as strong as a familial blood bond.
Mestor was not the only one watching Zeus intently, Alpha noted uneasily. The Feteine, Europa, separated from Zeus by the Monticore, had not stopped staring since she claimed her seat. She seemed unaware of anything else. Mestor’s jerky movements proved it was not only Alpha that had noticed her focus.
"Europa, Prince Azaes requests your presence."
Her gaze did not waver. "As you wish, Prince Mestor. I would be honored to accompany Atlainticia's heir apparent."
Alpha barely kept back a stream of harsh words. There were days he wished he was something other than what he was. Maybe with arms and legs, he would have been better able to protect Jiann and Volante. And with a mouth for speech, he could snarl at Europa and demand she explain her interest in Zeus.
Zeus made shushing noises as his eyelids fell closed again.
"She will not have me, Alpha. If she persists, I will question her intentions. Right now, I merely wish to rest, knowing both you and Dargon are safe."
He caressed Zeus’s skin, placating him for the moment. Sensing Zeus’s weariness, he built a wall around his stronger emotions for the time being.
Alpha watched as Europa unbuckled from the seat to follow Prince Mestor from the shuttle. Before the door closed behind her, she glanced back at Zeus. He swore he would discover what was behind her curiosity.
The door secured, a transmission announced the platform had been cleared of all life forms. Within moments they were airborne and on their way to The Gorgon. He never thought he would be so happy to board a vessel in all his life.