Honor rolled over and reached for Seth. When her hand met a cold space where his body had been, she sat up and looked around. Dawn was creeping through the windows, casting the bedroom in a grayish tint. The room seemed empty without Seth’s overpowering presence. Tilting her head, she listened. No sounds in the shower. He must be in the kitchen, drinking coffee and reading the newspaper. One of the many things she loved about Seth was his voracious need to read. She’d grown up getting lost in autobiographies and novels of all kinds. She loved that they had that in common.
Dropping back onto the bed, she stretched and smiled at the delicious little aches in certain muscles. Last night had been beyond wonderful. Sex with Seth was always spectacular. Last night it had been just as amazing, but different, too. There had been an element of need in him she’d never felt before. The connection they’d shared seemed almost otherworldly.
Honor rolled her eyes at her thoughts. Here she was sighing and getting all gooey over what had most definitely been Seth’s way to stop her from asking questions. She should resent the manipulation, but she couldn’t. Resenting such an incredible experience would definitely be in the territory of “cutting off her nose to spite her face.” Besides, they’d have plenty of time to talk today. It was Sunday, and they had nothing planned other than spending it together. Sundays were their special day—the only day of the week they reserved exclusively for each other.
The quietness of the apartment suddenly disturbed her. And if Seth had made coffee, why couldn’t she smell it? Bounding from the bed, she grabbed a robe from the hook on the door and pulled it on as she went to the kitchen—the empty kitchen.
Telling herself there could be any number of reasons why he’d left without waking her or at least leaving a note, she nevertheless wandered throughout the apartment looking for one. Nothing. It was as if he’d never been there.
First coffee, and then she would phone him. Maybe he’d gotten called back to the restaurant unexpectedly. She was making excuses for him, she knew that, but after last night, how could she not? Their lovemaking had always been passionate, beyond wonderful. Last night they’d reached a closeness she’d never thought it was possible to reach with another human being. Totally in tune with each other’s bodies, each other’s needs. A phenomenal experience she’d never forget and one she hoped to repeat often.
The vibration of her cellphone pulled her from dreamy, lustful thoughts. Hating the intrusion of reality, she grabbed up the device. Maybe it was Seth explaining why he wasn’t here. “Stone,” she said.
“Your boyfriend’s been cleared of all charges.”
Her heart leaped with relief. She had known there was nothing to the charges. Seth committing murder was almost laughable. She was glad it was over, though, not only for his sake, but hers, too. Dating a murder suspect wouldn’t exactly look good on her record.
“Did they catch the murderer?”
“Don’t know.”
“Do you know any details of why they dropped the charges on Seth?”
“No.”
She recognized a certain tone in Dudley’s voice. He wasn’t that hard to read when something was bothering him. “There’s something else. What is it?”
“Nothing other than I can’t get anything on why they no longer consider him a suspect. Just seems too damn hush-hush for my liking.”
Honor was used to his suspicious nature … it went along with the job. But when it came to this, there was no need to be suspicious. No matter how much circumstantial evidence, Seth as a murder suspect had never made any sense to her. She was glad Houston PD had seen that, too.
“I’m just happy it’s over.”
“Hmm.”
The reply wasn’t a rousing endorsement, but she hadn’t really expected anything more. Dudley had a tendency to want all of his people single and unattached. Honor hadn’t had a problem with that philosophy until she’d met Seth.
“Thanks for calling.”
Sounding preoccupied, Dudley said, “Yeah.”
Honor closed the phone and dropped it into the pocket of her robe. Despite her relief at hearing the news, something still nagged at her. Seth’s business required that he associate with all sorts of people, but she still couldn’t understand why one of those people had to be Hector Clemmons. Was there more to their association than he was telling her?
Disgusted with herself, Honor went to the kitchen and poured herself a cup of coffee. She had faith in Seth and felt guilty for even doubting him. When he returned, she’d make sure he knew how much she believed in him.
The steering wheel gripped tightly in his hands, Seth focused his eyes on the apartment in front of him.
Honor’s apartment
. She would be awake by now, wondering where he’d gone. He’d hated leaving her for the meeting. All warm, cozy woman cuddled up against him—the most beautiful woman he’d ever met. In a few minutes, it would be more than just leaving for a meeting. He’d be leaving forever.
He dragged a hand down his tired face and cursed himself. There was no one else to blame. He’d agreed to this assignment—so damned cocky and self-assured. Sure, he could take down Hector Clemmons. Sure, he could create such a deep-cover web of lies that not even the slickest of Hector’s investigators could penetrate it. He was single, had no commitments. When it was all over and done with, he’d explain everything to his family, and they’d understand.
Fuck!
That was before Honor. Before he’d met the woman he knew without a doubt he’d love for the rest of his life. And his family? Hell, he’d taken them for granted, too. Had assumed he’d be able to lie well enough to head off their questions. Had consoled himself with the idea that he was doing something good and honorable, and that when the time came for them to know the truth, they would forgive him easily and all the hurt would go away.
He was no longer a murder suspect. Not that he ever had been, but it had given Clemmons pause and that’s what they’d needed. The man trusted few, and Seth had been well on his way to slipping inside his inner circle. And then Hector had gotten antsy, backed off. Seth’s relationship with Honor had come under discussion; questions had been asked. Seth had known something was going to have to be done.
Monty Jenkins’s death had fallen into their laps—an opportunity too convenient to pass up. The suspicion of murder had been Bill’s idea. Jenkins was a former employee of Clemmons’s who’d been fired for stealing. He’d been found dead of a heroin overdose.
Instead of reporting the real cause of death, they’d decided to make it seem that Seth had done the deed. Everything had been a lie, from the neighbor who called in saying that there had been a gunshot and that he’d seen Seth leaving Jenkins’s apartment just a few minutes later, to the first on-the-scene detective, who’d reported that Monty had a bullet hole in his head. Then, when Seth was cleared of all suspicion, it would reassure Hector, because now not only was Seth in his camp, having murdered someone for him, but he could slide out of trouble as well as anyone—with a little help from Clemmons, that is.
Being cleared of a murder charge that he had every appearance of having committed wasn’t going to be enough, though. It might have eased Hector’s suspicions, but the man was still asking too many questions about Honor. And Honor’s mention of digging into Clemmons’s background had put Seth even more on edge. Having her involved with any of this wasn’t something he wanted. Stupid to think he could keep his personal life and professional life separate, especially when his personal life would be nonexistent until Clemmons went down.
Gripping the steering wheel so tight his knuckles went white, Seth shuddered out a breath. She would hate him. But he preferred hatred over her losing her career or her life.
He got out of the car, and on the way to the door, he set his jaw to the hard line of insolence he’d learned over the last few months. With his hand on the doorknob, he paused for a moment and, as crazy as it seemed, whispered a prayer for strength. Breaking Honor’s heart was going to require everything he had. He needed all the help he could get.
Honor looked up when the door opened. She’d been staring into her coffee for over an hour, arguing with herself over whether she should call Seth and find out what was going on. Thankful that she didn’t have to continue, she stood and waited for him to say something.
He walked into the middle of the living room and looked down at her full cup. “Any coffee left?”
“Yes.”
He passed her and went to the kitchen. Huffing an exasperated sigh, she followed him and watched as he poured himself a cup.
“I understand you’re no longer a murder suspect.”
He took an appreciative swallow and said, “News travels fast.”
“Did they get the murderer?”
Broad shoulders lifting in a careless shrug, he took his cup back into the living room, saying, “Hell if I know. Just glad to have them off my ass.”
Confused by his strange mood, Honor followed him again. He seemed almost cold, unapproachable. Feeling uncertain with Seth wasn’t a comfortable place for her. Especially after last night. Determined to move forward, she said, “So what do you want to do today? I thought we might—”
“I’ve already got plans.”
“What kind of plans?”
He lifted a cool gaze to her. “Plans that don’t include you.”
Honor jerked in response. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means exactly what I said. I’ve got things I want to do. You’re not invited.”
“What the hell’s going on?”
“Nothing other than I think this thing with us has gotten out of hand.”
Her hand dug into the material at the back of the sofa; her lips went numb from shock. “This thing …?”
“Yeah.
Thing
. I mean, don’t get me wrong, the sex is good … damn good. But face it, babe, that’s really all we’ve got. Eventually that’s going to get old.” His shoulder lifted in an insolent shrug. “Then what?”
She shook her head and reached a hand toward him. “Seth, you can’t—”
As if he didn’t want her near him, he backed away, out of her reach.
Honor, who was never at a loss for words, stared mutely at the man she’d thought she would spend the rest of her life with. Everything she’d thought they had, everything she’d thought Seth was, crumbled.
She told herself to get angry, to lash out at him. The fury would come later. For right now, an overwhelming hurt flooded through her. “I see,” she managed huskily.
For an instant, a spark of warmth flashed in his eyes. Before she could question that look, his face went impassive, even harder than before. No, she must have imagined the emotion. Now his eyes were cool, aloof, almost mocking. The mouth that had given her such pleasure the night before twisted in a slight smile. “Sorry, babe.”
Her vision blurred as hot tears threatened to spill. No! Honor Stone did not lose control in front of others. It was just not done … she had to get him out of here. Now! “Get out.”
His gaze swept over her body … Honor felt the insult to her soul. “Sure you don’t want one more round? Just for the hell of it?”
“I said, Get out.”
He took another swallow of coffee, then set the cup on the table and winked. “My loss.”
Turning her back to him, she heard the door shut. Her gazed dropped to the coffee cup he’d drunk from. Lifting it, she put her mouth in the exact place his lips had been. All warmth had receded … only the cold, hard surface remained. Eyes glazed with the tears she could no longer control, she hurled the cup across the room. Her dreams as shattered as the broken cup, Honor turned her back to the mess and walked away.
three
Present day
San Saria Island, Florida Keys
Clemmons is dead
.
Seth stared down at the crumpled note. Why he’d held on to it, he had no idea. The fact that Hector Clemmons was dead had made no real difference in his life. Though the man had received the death penalty, he’d survived barely five months of incarceration. A knife to the gut wasn’t exactly the easy way out, but it had been much less than what the bastard had deserved.
Still, it hadn’t changed Seth’s life. Or what his future held. He’d accepted long ago that taking down Clemmons would destroy much of him. Had actually thought he’d be found out before he could accomplish his goal and that he’d end up in the river with cement blocks tied to his legs. Clemmons had done that with a few who’d double-crossed him. Seth had been determined to bring him down but had eventually accepted that he wouldn’t live through it. Sometimes he wondered if he had.
Folding the note, he slid it into his wallet once more. At some point he’d get rid of it, but not today.
The calendar across the room pulled him from the edge of the bed, where he’d been sitting for what seemed like hours. Focused on today’s date, he moved slowly toward it. He hadn’t marked the day … didn’t see the point. It wasn’t like he would forget that today was both her birthday and the anniversary of when they’d met. Without conscious intent, his fingers touched the small white square, but in his mind, he saw only her face. The memory of their meeting was just as clear and vivid as if it’d been yesterday. He’d come to the party to work and be seen. Clemmons and many of his associates were attending, and it had been one more way to get in front of the man.
He had been standing, talking to some of Clemmons’s business associates, when she’d walked into the room. Seth had quite literally lost his breath. Job forgotten, his reason for being there no longer important. Mesmerized, he’d walked away in the middle of the conversation, without any explanation.
Honor’s instincts had been superb. She’d known instantly that someone was watching her. Those golden-green eyes had settled on him and the world had gone away. As he’d approached her, her eyes had widened. She had recognized a predator. Seth had known his expression couldn’t have been pleasant. Hell, he was walking across an overcrowded room full of strangers, dressed in a tuxedo and carrying a full-fledged, cast-iron hard-on. Hell no, he couldn’t have looked the least bit friendly. But instead of running, she’d stood rooted to the floor and watched him approach.
He’d stopped about a foot from her and found himself speechless. The glib tongue he’d always relied on to get him what he wanted disappeared. Seth had felt like a fifth grader at his first dance wanting to ask the prettiest girl there to step out onto the floor with him. For a man who’d had more girls flocking after him than he wanted to remember, he’d felt like the dumbest and clumsiest of oafs.
She’d held out her hand and given him a small, simple smile. That’s all it had taken for him to fall in love with her.
Silently, he’d pulled her out onto the postage-stamp-sized dance floor and, holding her close, started to dance. Instead of telling him to back off, that he was going too fast, holding her too tight, Honor had put her head on his shoulder and glided with him around the small space.
Later, he’d asked her why she’d gone into his arms so easily. A mysterious smile had curved her beautiful, lush mouth, but she had never answered the question. Seth had instantly forgotten what that question was. When Honor smiled … He’d trade an entire fortune, if he had one, for one of her smiles.
A harsh breath echoed in the room. What the hell was he doing? Staring at a blank square on a calendar as if it had some sort of meaning? The past was gone and couldn’t be reshaped or relived. He’d made the decision to let her go. She was somewhere else, hopefully thriving and happy. If she ever gave any thought to him at all, expletives and vile curses were probably included.
Contacting her and performing a major grovel occasionally entered his head, but that’d be a damn stupid thing to do. He wasn’t the same man he’d been back then. What they’d had couldn’t be resurrected. Honor had gotten on with her life. He needed to get the hell on with his, too.
He shook the melancholy away. Fishing, swimming, and diving in the midst of paradise—how could a man ask for anything more? He ignored the small voice that whispered the names of the people he loved, the people he’d hurt.
Disgusted with himself, he twisted around, grabbed his sunglasses, and headed out the door. The sun would be up soon. He wanted to get on his boat and be miles from land before that happened. This was his life now; he damn well needed to get used to it.