Sweet Spot (20 page)

Except she did. She cared a lot and she missed him. She also missed Raoul, which was weird. The kid had only been living with her for a month or so. Even Sheila seemed to be moping a little.

Rather than indulge in self-pity, Nicole collected cleaning supplies and attacked Raoul’s bathroom. She made the tub sparkle, the shower doors streak-free, then started tidying up the long counter. There was a half-open box of condoms just behind the cup dispenser. She shook the box.

“Should have used them every time,” she murmured. That would have solved a lot of problems.

Of course condoms weren’t a hundred percent effective. So they might have always used them.

Nicole stared at the box. Condoms failed. She and Hawk used condoms. Except for that last time. Not that she could be pregnant. It was the wrong time of the month. She was sure of it.

Panic was a funny thing. Sometimes it came in big rushes, but sometimes it started so small it was hard to recognize the feeling. Sometimes it was nothing more than a flicker that grew and grew until it filled the room and made it impossible to breathe.

The phone rang.

Nicole jumped then ran to her bedroom.

“Hello?”

“It’s Raoul.”

Relief was instant and sweet. “Where are you? Are you okay? What’s going on? Did you try to get married? Did you consider that using a fake ID invalidates the marriage? When are you coming home?”

There was a slight pause, then he said, “That’s a lot of questions.”

“Answer them in any order. No. Start with telling me if you’re okay.”

“I’m okay. We both are. We’re not married, we didn’t try.” He paused again. “There’s no baby.”

Nicole sank onto her bed. “You’re sure?”

“Yeah. She got her period. Brittany isn’t pregnant.”

Thank God, Nicole thought. “Are you okay with that? Is she?”

“We’re good. She was a little upset at first, but now she’s better. I’m…” He cleared his throat. “I started thinking about what you said before. About something going wrong. Me busting up my knee or something. I got scared. I’m glad there’s no baby. Is that bad?”

“Of course not. You’re still in high school. Why would you want to take on that kind of responsibility?”

“I still want a family.”

A place to belong, she thought, recognizing the longing in his voice.

“I’m your family,” she said. “I miss you. So does Sheila. This is your home, Raoul.”

“Still?”

“You mean because you took off in the night and didn’t give me any warning except a crappy note?”

“I’m sorry about that. I wanted to tell you but Brittany was afraid you’d try to stop us.”

“She’s a smart girl.” Spoiled, but smart. “You’re still welcome to live here. Although we’re going to have a long talk about the rules. There will be some new ones. When are you coming home?”

“Today. Brittany’s on her cell phone with her dad. They seem to be getting along again. She’ll be moving back home.”

That was a relief, Nicole thought. “She’ll be happier there,” is what she said, followed by, “Drive safely.”

“I will.”

“Good.”

“I would have done it,” he said. “I would have taken care of her and the baby.”

“I know.”

“I’m glad I don’t have to right now.”

“Me, too.”

“Thanks, Nicole. You’ve been great. I couldn’t have gotten through this without you.”

She felt all warm and squishy inside. Having Raoul around was like having a better version of Jesse home.

“Hurry back,” she said.

“We will. Bye.”

She hung up. It was a good ending to what could have been a disaster. Brittany moving back with her dad was also a plus. Let Hawk deal with his little princess. She had enough on her plate right now.

She put down the phone and walked into the hallway. On the top shelf of the linen closet was the pregnancy kit Brittany had left. There were still two tests left inside.

Nicole thought about the condoms and how her luck had been running lately, then she carried the box into her bathroom.

Ten minutes later, she stared at the plastic stick.

There was still a baby, she thought, unable to believe the news. It just wasn’t the one everyone thought.

She climbed out of her car and walked toward him. Her expression was wary, as if she wasn’t sure how mad he was going to be. Indecision pulled at her mouth. No doubt she was trying to figure out the best way to play him.

Nicole had been right about him taking the easy way out with Brittany. He hadn’t wanted to hear that truth and he’d taken a lot of his temper out on the messenger, but he’d been unable to escape reality. Somewhere in the past few years, Brittany had turned into a spoiled brat.

“Oh, Daddy, I’m so happy to see you,” she said, rushing toward him. “I missed you, Daddy. I missed you so much.”

So she’d decided to play the loving daughter game. He accepted her hug, patted her back, then led the way into the house. When they were in the kitchen, she walked to the refrigerator and pulled out a can of soda.

“I feel really bad about worrying you,” she said as she popped the top. “I should have called sooner. Raoul and I hadn’t planned to run away. It just sort of happened. We were talking and then we were packing and then we were gone.”

She paused and smiled, blinking her eyes. “It was very immature of me.”

Did she really think he was that stupid? Hawk shook his head. He already knew the answer to that. Of course she did or she wouldn’t be working the program so hard.

“It was a spontaneous decision to run off?” he asked.

She sipped. “Uh-huh.”

“You just happened to have a fake ID in your back pocket?”

Her eyes widened. “Um, no. It was just lying around.”

“A fake ID in your name with your picture on it.”

“I don’t know where that came from.”

Better to play innocent than come up with a crappy lie, he thought.

“Either you got it or Raoul got it,” he continued. “I’m guessing it has to be Raoul. You’d never do anything like that, would you?”

Her eyes widened even more. “No, Daddy.” Her smile trembled a little at the corners.

“It’s illegal. Getting a minor a fake ID. The police know about it. I should probably warn Nicole they’ll be by to arrest him. Damn. We’re going into the play-offs, too. If Raoul has to miss games because he’s in jail, we’ll never win. It’s his senior year, too. If he doesn’t play, the colleges are going to forget about him. But hey, he earned it, right? He screwed up and now he has to face the consequences.”

Brittany’s face crumbled. She put her soda on the counter and reached out for him. “Daddy, no. Don’t talk like that. Raoul can’t go to jail.”

“Sorry, Brittany. He has to learn his lesson.”

“No. That’s not fair.”

The tears fell faster. Normally Hawk would do anything to make her stop crying, but not this time. He felt oddly detached from the moment. She was his daughter and he would always love her, but he was tired of her calling the shots.

He turned to walk out of the kitchen. Brittany followed him, then grabbed his arm. “It was me,” she said, sobbing and gasping for breath. “It was me. I got the fake ID. It was my idea to use it so we could get married. Raoul didn’t want to. He’s really sweet, Daddy. He worships you. He would never do anything to hurt you or me.”

Hawk did his best not to think about Raoul sleeping with his daughter. While he would consider that crossing the line, Raoul and Brittany wouldn’t see it that way.

“You lied to me,” he said, his voice low.

“I know. I know. I’m so sorry. I just thought…I wanted to get married. I wanted to start my life with Raoul. I wanted us to be happy and a family. Just like you and Mom.”

He put his arm around his daughter and led her into the family room. When she was settled on the sofa, he sat on the coffee table in front of her and took one of her hands in his.

“I loved your mom more than anything,” he said slowly. “I still remember the first time I saw her. She was laughing and the sound cut through me. I knew she was the one, that we would always be together, that I would marry her. There was never a question. She knew, too.”

Brittany wiped away her tears. “Just like me and Raoul.”

He ignored that. “We got together and fell in love. We had plans. Then she turned up pregnant.”

“I know this part.”

“No, you don’t. You know what we told you. Your mom and I were worried that if you knew the truth, you’d feel you weren’t wanted, weren’t loved. I don’t know if it was the right decision, but it’s the one we made. You’ve only heard half the story, Brittany. There’s more I need to tell you.”

“Like what?”

“Like how your mom cried every night for six months because her parents turned their backs on her. How after we were married, we hardly ever saw each other. We were living in my room at my mom’s house, both working two jobs to save as much money as possible because once I went to Oklahoma and started playing football, there wouldn’t be any time for me to work.”

Brittany shifted in her seat. “But that was only for a few weeks. Then you were together.”

“Then I was at practice or in class. Your mom was alone in a strange city where she didn’t know anyone. She was given a job as a receptionist, but she was the youngest person there. She had nothing in common with the other women who were single and going out all the time. She went home to an empty house and waited for me to come home. She spent four years waiting.”

“But then she had me.”

“Yeah, she had a baby. So now she was alone and responsible for an infant. She had no friends, no one to call. Her own mother didn’t speak to her for over a year.”

“But what about the alumni? You said they helped.”

“They did. They brought casseroles and sometimes babysat. They gave us names of doctors and helped with the bills. They made it possible, but it was never easy. There were times your mom and I fought so much we made you cry. There were weeks we hated each other and if we’d had the money, we would have gotten divorced a hundred times over.”

Tears filled Brittany’s eyes again. “Daddy, no.”

He squeezed her fingers. “We worked it out. We realized we loved each other and we were going to have to try harder. Then I signed with the NFL and we were able to move back here. Life got easier. You started school and Serena and I could finally spend some time together. We made it, but just barely.”

“I thought it was different. I thought it was a fairy tale.”

“I know. Maybe that was a mistake.”

Nicole had been right. He and Serena had paved the way to this disaster. They’d practically illustrated a manual on how to screw up a life.

“There’s no baby,” Brittany whispered. “I was sad before, but maybe it’s a good thing. I guess I should go on birth control, Dad.”

Not a conversation he wanted to have.

“You’ll have plenty of time to think about how you want to handle that,” he said. “You already have an appointment with your doctor in two weeks.”

She pulled back her hand. “Dad! That’s so embarrassing.”

“So’s getting pregnant at seventeen. Not that I see that happening again anytime soon.”

“What do you mean?”

“You won’t be going out with Raoul for a while.”

She glared at him. “You can’t make me break up with him. He’s my boyfriend and I love him.”

“I’m sure you do, but this isn’t about him. This is about you. You lied to me about your relationship. You moved out, you ran off, you got a fake ID. I’ve always trusted you and given you a lot of freedom. Obviously you’re not mature enough to handle it.”

“What?”

He stood. “You’re grounded, Brittany. You won’t be dating anyone for a while. You’ll go to school, then sit in my office and do homework until I’m ready to leave.”

“That’s crazy. I’ll drive myself home.”

“I’m taking away your car.”

“What? You can’t!” She shrieked loud enough to injure the neighborhood dogs. “Daddy, no!”

“No car for a month. You’re grounded for six weeks. The last two weeks are to test your ability to be responsible. If you can’t handle it, you’ll lose the car completely until you’re eighteen. For now I’m letting you keep your cell phone and Internet privileges, but let me be clear. They are privileges. I can take them away, too.”

She pushed past him, turned and glared. “You can’t do this.”

“I can and I have.”

“It’s not fair. I wasn’t that bad.”

“You were that bad and worse. I worried so much about how you felt after your mom died. I wanted to make things easy for you and I did. Too easy. You’re spoiled, Brittany. If something doesn’t change, you’re going to become the kind of person no one likes. I don’t want that. I want to be proud of you again.”

She began to cry again. “Daddy, don’t.”

He wasn’t sure what she wanted him to stop, but he didn’t care. He walked past her and entered the kitchen. Her car keys were lying on the counter. He pocketed them.

Brittany ran into the kitchen. “You can’t do this. You can’t treat me like a child.”

“You’re acting like one.”

“This is so unfair. I hate you.”

“Right now, you’re not my favorite person, either. I love you, Brittany, but you’ve crossed the line.”

She turned and raced out of the room. He heard her footsteps on the stairs, followed by the sound of her slamming her door. When there was silence, he leaned against the counter and wondered how the hell he was going to get through the next month.

It would be hard. There were more laws to lay down and Brittany wasn’t going to take any of it well. He was fighting uphill—he should have done this years ago. But with luck, he could still turn her around.

He walked into his study, but couldn’t sit. He felt too restless. Something was still wrong and he couldn’t figure out what it was. He felt uncomfortable. Like he didn’t fit in his skin anymore.

Brittany was back, he’d done the father thing. Everything was right. What did he have that was…

Nicole, he thought. He needed to talk to Nicole. They’d fought and he’d hurt her. She’d only been telling him the truth, saying what he needed to hear. He respected that, and he missed her.

He walked upstairs and knocked on Brittany’s door.

“Go away,” she yelled.

“Keep talking like that and you’ll lose your phone.”

There were a couple of seconds of silence followed by her opening her bedroom door.

Her face was pale and streaked with tears. “Okay,” she said, then sniffed.

His knee-jerk reaction was to tell her not to worry, that they could put this all behind them. But he knew that would be a mistake.

“I’m going to see Nicole,” he said. “I’ll be gone a while.”

“You’re leaving? Now? After ripping my life apart and destroying me?”

Good to know Brittany hadn’t lost her flair for the dramatic. “Just wanted you to know I was gone. I’m taking your car keys with me, so don’t think you can sneak out. I expect you to stay up here and think about what you did wrong.”

“Daddy, no. You can’t leave. Not now.” More tears slid down her cheeks. “Don’t. Don’t go to Nicole.”

“Why not? I want to spend time with her.”

“If I can’t go out, you can’t go out.”

He folded his arms across his chest. “You didn’t just say that.”

She swallowed. “Sorry. No. I didn’t mean that. It’s just I don’t want you to be gone right now. You hurt me.”

“I punished you. There’s a difference.”

“But, Daddy…” Her voice was a high-pitched whine. One that grated on his last nerve.

“What’s the real problem here?”

“I don’t know. It’s just…How much do you like her?”

Interesting question. “I like her a lot.”

Brittany’s eyes widened. “You mean, like it’s serious?”

“Yes.” More than serious, he thought. “She’s very important to me.”

“But you said you were just dating. You said it didn’t matter.”

“That was before.” When they’d had a deal. But the deal had turned out to be real.

“You’re not supposed to be with anyone but Mom. You promised.”

“I will always love Serena, but it’s been five years, Brittany. I’m allowed to have a life.”

“No, you’re not. You’re my dad. You can’t care about someone more than me. Is that it? Do you love her? Do you?”

Did he? Love? He’d never thought about that. He’d always had fun with women, but he didn’t get involved. Not seriously. Love.

“I don’t know,” he admitted, turning the idea over in his mind. Love?

“I hate you,” Brittany screamed. “I hate you and I hate her.”

Her door slammed. Hawk ignored the sound and his daughter’s tantrum.

Why hadn’t he seen it before? How important Nicole had become to him? How much he looked forward to seeing her? How he counted on her and trusted her and needed her in his life?