Tagan's Child (45 page)

I laced my
fingers with his and looked up into his eyes. “Thank you. My life
is in such a state of flux at the moment, it’s difficult to know
what to do for the best.”

“I know. You
will work it out with Halsan and we will take things as slowly as
you need to.”

The look in his
eyes was so genuine and heartfelt it melted my insides. I raised
his hand to my lips and kissed his knuckles.

“I really want
to hold you in my arms right now, but I know that would be an
illegal gesture,” he said teasing me and lightening the
atmosphere.

“And talking of
illegal gestures,” I said, prodding his knee with my finger. “You
are not allowed to wink at me in company. I’m sure Leylana suspects
something.”

“It’s so hard,”
he complained.

“It’s not easy
for me either, but I don’t want to burden Toby with anything more
at the moment. He needs to make a decision about his future without
him worrying about how that decision might affect me. Besides, it’s
not as if we’ve had a conventional courtship so far, it would be
nice to enjoy each other for a while longer without every man and
his dog knowing about us. In fact, the secrecy is sort of nice in a
way.” I looked up at him a little bashfully.

Toby was the
main reason why I didn’t want to tell anyone about us but not
telling anyone for the moment was also a way of delaying any
trouble with Ahran’s parents. I was dreading the time when he would
have to tell them because I knew it would be disastrous for his
already strained relationship with his father, but my biggest fear
was that once his father found out about us, Ahran would lose
everything.

“I understand
and respect your reasons for not telling anyone yet, as torturous
as it is, but as long as you understand that whenever we are alone
I will not be able to keep my hands off you.”

“That’s fine by
me,” I said, smiling at him.

“Good, I’m glad
we have come to an agreement,” he said with feigned
seriousness.

My heart
swelled. I loved that there was such easy banter between us, I
loved that we so desperately wanted each other, I loved that he was
kind and sensitive and supportive. I loved him, it was as simple as
that. I gently squeezed his hand.

The humour
disappeared from his eyes and was replaced by something darker,
hotter. “I think we better go before I break all the rules.” He put
his sunglasses on and started the car.

I smiled at
him. “You look seriously hot in those glasses,” I confided.

“Carry on like
that and I will be pulling over as soon as we are out of the palace
gates to have my wicked way with you.”

I laughed. “As
long as nobody can see us, you can do whatever you want to me,” I
said flirtatiously.

“Ah Sophie!
Don’t say things like that or we are going to miss the delivery
I’ve been waiting for.”

I laughed again
and rested my hand on his thigh. He took hold of the steering
wheel.

“I was
expecting this car to have an autopilot,” I said.

“It does, but I
prefer to drive manually.”

We pulled out
of the palace and onto the track leading to the main road.

“What’s being
delivered?” I asked.

“My new
tractor,” he said excitedly.

“Wow! That is
exciting.” I hesitated, maybe now was as good a time to get a few
things off my chest. “Have you spoken to Talina since we’ve been
back?”

“Yes, I have
broken off our engagement,” he replied.

I felt a wave
of relief. I didn’t need to ask how she took it because I could
probably guess. I cleared my throat. “And have you told your
father?”

“Yes I have.”
He glanced over at me before returning his eyes to the road, he was
obviously wondering where I was going with this. Nevertheless his
answer took me by surprise. I hadn’t expected him to have told his
parents so soon.

“And how did he
take it?” I asked.

“Well, let’s
just say he wasn’t jumping for joy.” I sensed he was downplaying
his father’s reaction.

“Aren’t you
worried you might lose your inheritance and your farm?” Elaya’s
words were ringing in my ears and they were out of my mouth before
I could stop them.

He looked over
at me again, but because of his sunglasses, I struggled to read the
expression in his eyes.

He looked back
at the road. “I couldn’t care a less about my inheritance, I don’t
need my father’s money and as far as the farm is concerned, it’s
none of his business,” he said, sounding decidedly prickly.

Was it true?
His father had no financial hold over him whatsoever? Or was he
just saying it so I didn’t feel guilty for being the one who made
him lose everything. “It’s just that Elaya seemed to think he
helped you buy it.”

Ahran snorted.
“Don’t get me wrong, I love my sister but she really has no idea
how I run my affairs and she had no right to talk to you about
it.”

I felt guilty.
I had a strong suspicion Elaya would get an ear bashing over this
and it was all my fault, I shouldn’t have said anything. “Please
don’t be angry with her, she was only trying to protect you.”

“Protect me?”
he asked.

My heart sank,
I was really beginning to wish I hadn’t brought the subject up. I
cringed inwardly. “Oh it doesn’t matter.”

“Protect me
from what, Sophie?”

I took a deep
breath and silently apologised to Elaya. “She happened to mention
that if you and I got together there was a chance you might lose
the farm.” I tried to say it as light heartedly as I could in the
hope he wouldn’t be any angrier with her than he already was.

“Is that why
you are so reluctant for anyone to know about us?”

Goddammit, he
was good. I couldn’t deny it. “It may have been one of the
reasons,” I said in a small voice.

“For God’s sake
Sophie, why didn’t you ask me?”

“Because I was
frightened you might change your mind about us.” There I had said
it!

He looked
across at me. “How could you think that? Even if it had been the
case it wouldn’t have changed my feelings for you.”

This was like
music to my ears.

“My father has
no control over my life. I made sure of that when I left
university. I never wanted to rely on him. He was unreliable when I
was a child and I knew to depend on him as an adult would have been
foolish.”

“You don’t have
to explain,” I said, feeling embarrassed. He obviously guarded his
privacy very carefully if his sister didn’t even know what the
situation was.

“Yes I do, I
don’t want there to be any secrets between us Sophie. If there is
anything you want to know, ask me, I will always tell you the
truth.” He paused. “If we have any chance of a future together we
have to be open with one another.” For some reason I got the
impression he was saying this more for his own benefit than
mine.

He was gripping
the steering wheel so tightly, it was causing his knuckles to go
white. He was clearly angry. I placed my hand over his. “I’m sorry,
I shouldn’t have brought it up.”

“Yes you should
have, and sooner than now if it has been bothering you that much.”
He hesitated. “On the subject of being honest with one another,
there is something I need to tell you.”

The colour
seemed to drain from his face and I felt the most awful sense of
foreboding.

“What is it?” I
asked.

He was staring
straight ahead and his expression was beginning to scare me. He ran
a hand through his hair.

“I…you need to
know….” He faltered and the seconds ticked by.

I sat and
waited. Whatever it was he was finding it very difficult to voice
and I felt my unease increase. “What is it Ahran?” I asked
again.

“I…I’m a man of
considerable means,” he said finally, hurriedly.

Was that it? I
let out the breath I had been holding. I’d been expecting something
far worse than that. I almost laughed. “You don’t have to tell me
Ahran, I get it, and if you are worried about it, I’m not after
your money,” I reassured him.

He seemed to
relax. Did he really think I was after his fortune?

“I have had
considerable success on the stock market here,” he confided, “and
I’ve accrued a significant amount of money over the years.”

“So if we were
to ever get married,” I interrupted, “you would want me to sign a
prenuptial agreement, is that what you are saying?”

Suddenly, he
roared with laughter. I failed to see the funny side of it. Isn’t
that what Hollywood couples did when there were fortunes at
stake?

“No, Sophie, I
would never expect you to sign a prenuptial agreement. If we were
to marry, it would be for life, you would be stuck with me. I just
want you to know everything there is to know about me, that’s all.”
For some reason he sounded disappointed with himself. I couldn’t
even begin to think why. Surely, he was proud of his achievements?
I still wasn’t quite sure why he had been so worried about telling
me about his wealth. The whole conversation had been rather
confusing.

“So, you spoke
to your father about breaking off your engagement. Did you tell him
about us?” I asked, changing the subject.

“No, since we
came back from Morana you’ve seemed distant at times. I didn’t want
to say anything to my parents before I knew how you felt.”

He had been his
usual perceptive self. Until last night I had planned to walk away
but now there was no chance of that. I suppose I felt relieved that
nobody except Elaya and possibly Leylana knew about us. It still
gave us the chance to enjoy each other for a while before we became
Ramian headline news.

“So we’re a
couple then,” I said, surprising myself when I realised I’d said it
out loud.

“Does that
please you?”

Ahran spoke
flawless English, but every now and then he sounded like a
foreigner.

I smiled as I
looked at him. “Yes, it pleases me.” Some of the biggest obstacles
standing in the way of a happy future with Ahran had melted away
during our conversation. I couldn’t quite believe that maybe we had
a chance together. I stared out of the window with a stupid grin on
my face.

Eventually we
arrived at Ahran’s farm and he stopped the car at the gate.

“Okay, are you
ready for the grand tour?” He seemed anxious, I think it really
mattered to him what I thought.

I smiled and
nodded.

The surrounding
countryside was green and lush and not as mountainous as the area
where the King and Queen lived. We drove down a long tree lined
drive for about a half a mile until it opened out onto a sweeping
gravel drive in front of the house, which turned out to be a very
pretty white weather boarded homestead. I think I had been
expecting something more… grand. It was a pleasant surprise. The
house was two stories, and apart from a large apex at one end, the
second floor was in the roof, judging by the dormer windows looking
out like a pair of inviting eyes. On the ground floor, a veranda
wrapped itself around the front of the house. The front garden was
a little overgrown but must have been lovingly tended at one time.
There were well-stocked borders with an array of plants and shrubs
surrounding a lawn. A path ran through the middle of it and led to
the front door. I sat there for a while taking it all in, it was
the kind of house I had dreamed of as a little girl.

“It doesn’t
look much at the moment but I’m going to have it modernised and
extended.” Ahran had mistaken my silence for me being
underwhelmed.

“No, it’s
lovely,” I breathed.

“You like it?”
He sounded surprised and relieved.

I nodded and
got out of the car. Ahran joined me on the gravel. There were lots
of trees surrounding the house which gave it a sense of seclusion
and I could hear the birds singing in the trees. I took in a deep
breath. The air was laden with the heady scent of jasmine. “Mmm,
that smell is divine.”

“There’s a
walled garden out the back but it’s covered with weeds. Once I’ve
finished the house I’ll concentrate on getting the gardens back to
their former glory. Let me show you inside,” he said, taking my
hand. We walked up to the front door. Ahran struggled to turn the
key in the lock. “Technology hasn’t quite caught up out here,” he
said apologetically. He seemed genuinely concerned I would think it
old-fashioned but it really couldn’t have been more perfect.

It was the
first time I had seen Ahran unsure about anything. He was obviously
more worried about what I thought than I had realised. Did he
envisage me living here with him? Leylana was right, it was very
beautiful and a house I had only dreamed of, but could I see myself
living here? Could I leave my home and friends behind on Earth?
What if things didn’t work out between us? And off I went again,
falling back into my old negative thought patterns, fearful of the
future, too consumed about the ‘what ifs’ and ‘buts’. I was tired
of it, so very tired. Why couldn’t I just take what life had to
offer without fearing what was around the corner the whole time? I
was always afraid to look ahead. Had my experiences damaged me so
much that I was never going to be able to allow my own happiness to
blossom? I shook my head, frustrated with myself.

Ahran finally
managed to turn the key and gave the door a shove to open it.

There were worn
wooden floor boards in the entrance hall. We walked through to the
kitchen, passing doors to our left and right which must have been
the reception rooms. In the kitchen, the walls were white and the
units were tired looking but even though the house needed some
attention it was warm and welcoming.

“It obviously
needs some work. This room is south facing and the sun is in here
most of the day. I intend to extend it so that the kitchen is
bigger and lighter.”