Read Taking Chances: A Donnelley Brother's Novel Online
Authors: Alannah Carbonneau
What was I supposed to be arguing, again?
Damn, the man looked good. I mean
really
good. He was no longer wearing shorts and a t-shirt. Instead, he wore dark jeans paired with a black button down shirt. And his boots!
Oh. My. God.
Collin Donnelley was walking toward me with well-worn cowboy boots.
My heart raced and I tried to calm my suddenly active libido. Since when did it kick into overdrive at the sight of a man in cowboy boots? Maybe it wasn’t the boots. Maybe it was just the man who wore them so damn well. I didn’t know. Hell, I didn’t freaking want to know.
At that moment, that very shameful moment, I thought about running away from him. And not just running into the safety of my little cabin, but running straight for the trees like the absolute crazy person I had become in the last few minutes. Thankfully, my feet felt suddenly weighted. That new weight was the only saving grace that kept me from sentencing myself to the utter doom that would be the humiliation I would be forced to live with for the next six months I spent here.
Trying to shake the sight of this man in cowboy boots from my mind, I lifted my eyes once again to his face. And oh, I shouldn’t have. Because again, he looked really good. His eyes were shimmering bright. The warm emerald was accentuated by the deep ebony of his shirt and his hair - oh, the sandy blond hair looked like perfect pulling hair.
At the thought, I felt my spine stiffen. Since when did I have those thoughts? Seriously, were these the hormones my girlfriends back home teased me about lacking? I mean, I’d been told that maybe I was a late hormone bloomer, but I’d never once thought they were going to be this bad when they finally decided to wake from their hibernation.
The real question was what was it about this man that initiated their wake in the first place? Why him? Of all the men in this great big world, why Collin Donnelley? And better yet, what the hell was I going to do about it?
The sound of his boots on the wood of my step shocked me back into the present and I flinched, practically scurrying to one of the chairs. I lowered myself onto the wood before curling my knees into my chest and hugging them tight.
“Hey, beautiful.” Collin leaned against the railing of the porch as he looked down at me. “You alright?”
“I can’t go with you to this bonfire tonight.”
“What?” He frowned and I felt my heart lurch as I tried to swallow the discomfort building in my throat. “Why not?”
“I’m not comfortable with it.”
“Why?” I could feel his eyes on me, unmoving, and that made this so much worse.
“Because I’m not.” I looked up at him and knew, by the determined look in his eyes, that I had to give him more. If I didn’t he would continue to push. I just knew he would. “I haven’t seen your mom or Reese since...”
“Hadley, they’re mad at me for that day, not you.”
“I’m not worried they’re mad at me.” I snapped and he sighed.
“I know, I meant...”
He paused and I continued. “I’m worried that they’ll think I’m foolishly trying to hook you even though I know you don’t want to be hooked. I don’t want or need that reputation, Collin.” I shook my head before dropping it into my hands. “I have to be here for the next six months. I can’t leave, no matter how badly I might want to. And I don’t want to spend those six months uncomfortable around your family. Sorry, but you’ve kind of got a big family.”
Collin lowered himself onto his knees in front of me. I felt his hands circle around my wrists before he pulled my hands from my face, forcing me to look down into those damn green eyes. “I’m so sorry for the discomfort I’ve caused you, Hadley. I can’t take back the words I said, but I want so badly to make them right.” He sighed a sound of frustration. “I’m trying to make it right. Please, let me try and come with me tonight.”
“I don’t know...”
He cut me off. “If you’re at all uncomfortable when we’re there, I’ll bring you home.”
I looked down into his handsome face. “Do you promise?”
“Yes.” He nodded. “I promise.”
“Okay, I suppose I’ll go”
“Great.” He rose to his full height, which was tall, before pulling me up to stand before him. “But you’re going to get cold if you wear this all night.”
I glanced down at my shorts and tank top before sighing, “Sorry. I really didn’t think I’d be coming with you.”
“You’ll always come with me.” He announced with a wink, and for a moment, I just stared up at him with a frown on my face. And then the perverseness that was his comment registered and I scoffed.
Knocking my hand into the side of his arm, I grumbled. “You’re full of yourself.” Walking past him, I paused at the door. “I’ll be right back.”
The sound of Collin’s laughter followed me into the small cabin and I couldn’t help but replay it over and over again as I dressed in a pair of tight legged yoga pants and a lightweight cream colored knit sweater than hung off the side of one shoulder. Beneath, I donned a nude tank top.
I decided to leave my long blond hair down before I jogged from the bedroom, slipped my feet into a pair of black flats at the door and met Collin outside once again. He was leaning over the porch railing, watching the dogs sniff around the little cabin that surely had my scent - a new scent - all over it.
I announced my presence somewhat unconventionally. “If you want to hang out here all night, I’d be totally good with that, but if you want to go, I suggest we leave now or we’ll be late.”
Turning, he grinned at me. “Alright, smartass, let’s get going.”
I laughed into the silence of the setting sun as he led me down the quaint path to the quad. As he threw a leg over the seat, I asked. “Do you drive this thing everywhere?”
“Pretty much.” He shrugged. “I like riding quads. Do it in the winter and do it in the summer.”
“Huh.”
He winked. “It’s more fun than driving the truck.”
“And since you’re such a kid at heart...” I let my words drag off, speaking for themselves.
“Smartass.” Collin muttered under his breath. “Get on and hold on, beautiful.”
“Kay!” I agreed as I tossed my leg over the seat, scooting up nice and close to the man I had been spending my time with at this Ranch. My heart raced.
He shifted slightly to face me. “You wanna drive?”
“Not a chance.” I shook my head and he chuckled. I couldn’t hear it because the engine was rumbling loudly, but I could feel it. Moving closer to press my front against his back, I held on tight as the quad started moving.
For a few minutes, the dogs ran ahead of us on the quad, before they grew bored and wandered off. I assumed they were going back to Collin’s house, as that was where their home seemed to be, but I couldn’t be certain.
With the dogs now gone, I found myself focusing on the trees and land that passed us by. The land was thickly decorated with trees and in the not so far distance, mountains sturdy and gray loomed. With the sun setting over their massive peaks, they appeared almost golden in tone. The sight was so beautiful I couldn’t help but sigh.
Collin rolled the quad to a stop outside a big log house with amber lights spilling from the large windows and I felt the relaxation in my body morph as it coiled into tension. I was so not ready for this.
Collin shifted in my arms and I remembered that I was still holding tight to him, even though he’d turned off the quad. Feeling bashful, I quickly released him before scrambling from the quad. Collin followed quickly, before he reached out to grip my waist in both his big hands. My entire body turned to hot stone as he tugged me closer.
“You don’t need to be so nervous, beautiful.” He promised softly. “I’m right here. I’ll be right here all night.”
I nodded. “It’s because you’re right here that I’m nervous.”
His brows pulled together. “You don’t want me near?”
“People are going to think there’s something going on between us, aren’t they?” I whispered for no good reason. There was no one around to hear my words regardless.
“Why would they think that?”
“Because!” I shrugged, annoyance fringing my tone. “I thought you didn’t, you know, bring girls around much?”
“I don’t.” He shrugged again and I felt frustration blooming in my chest.
“I don’t want people thinking anything, Collin.” I whisper-hissed and his hands gripped my waist tighter. “You can’t touch me like this.” I placed my hands on his, trying to push his warm hands from my waist with no success. “This looks wrong.”
“I don’t care what it looks like. It’s not wrong. You’re my friend, Hadley, there ain’t a damn thing wrong with me touching you.”
I huffed. “You’re impossible.”
“Let’s get inside.” His reply was gravelly. “The longer we stand out here, the more they’re going to think we’re making out against a tree.”
I gasped, feeling my eyes widen as I squeaked. “They will?”
He tossed his head back on a heavy sigh of exasperation. “No, Hadley. A man and a woman can be outside without sucking face.”
“Oh.” I blushed, feeling aggravated with him. “Why are you being a jerk?”
“Because, I’m irritated that you care so much about what people think.” He paused and I stopped to face him. “It’s your life. Stop giving a shit about what others think and live your days the way you want to live them.”
I wished his words didn’t make so much sense to me. But they did - and they were words Michael would have said to me as well. After a moment, I nodded. “Okay.”
“Okay?” He raised a brow. “You’re not going to fight with me?”
“There’s really no point. You’re too bullheaded.” I smiled a peace offering. “Let’s have a good night tonight, yeah?”
“Yeah.”
There were tons of people at Reese and Logan’s house for the bonfire. I knew it was more than just family, because Jackson was there as well. As soon as I saw his easy-going blue eyes, I knew I wasn’t the only non-family member crashing on family time and I had to admit that I was deeply relieved.
People were standing by the kitchen island, picking at the trays of food Reese had set out, chatting happily with humor and vigor. I could see through the large kitchen window, that there was a large fire blazing in the back yard. Considering most of the people inside, lingering around the island, were women, I figured most of the men were outside. However, there were a few men standing in the kitchen. Logan, the interrogator, was one of those men and I assumed that it had nothing to do with the food splayed over the island, but more the pregnant woman who was laughing loudly with another woman with long dark hair. I recognized the woman as the other half of the outdoorsy dressed couple who’d witnessed my humiliating face in the crotch moment.
As the memory resurfaced, I felt my face heat. Jackson took that moment to call out loudly toward Collin and I. “Hadley, Collin!” He waved exuberantly. “You’re here.”
“Hi.” I waved back, cursing my small, suddenly shy voice.
Collin placed his hand on the small of my back, guiding me through the house toward Jackson. I’d thought his hand on my back, in my space, while being in the company of all these people would make me uncomfortable - but it didn’t. Instead, I found my body leaning into his touch and the small, familiar comfort it provided.
When had Collin Donnelley’s touch become familiar? When had it become comforting?
“I thought you were going into town tonight?” Collin asked Jackson.
“Naw.” Jackson shook his head before looking down at me. “You kind of stole my wing man. How am I supposed to pick up the ladies without my man on my side.”
I felt my eyes lift to Collin’s face. “You help him get girls?” I looked back at Jackson. “Why do you need help?”
Jackson grinned down at me. “You don’t think I need help?”
Suddenly, I felt Collin’s eyes on my face. They were hot and piercing. I answered truthfully. “No. You’re very attractive and you’re also very nice.”
Collin stiffened beside me, but Jackson replied, oblivious to his friend’s sudden tenseness. “You think I’m attractive?”
“Well, yeah.” I nodded. “I mean, you’re not exactly my type, but I don’t see you having a difficult time getting girls.”
“Huh.” Jackson smirked. “Not your type?”
“Nope.” I shrugged. “Sorry.”
“Is Collin your type?”
“Um...” my palms were getting moist. “Well, if I wanted to get my heart broken he’d definitely be the man I turned to.”
Jackson laughed loudly, but Collin didn’t even crack a smile. Instead, he stood stone still beside me - but he never once removed his hand from the small of my back. Suddenly, I wasn’t sure if what I’d said had been wrong. Had I offended him? Because that hadn’t been my intention. I was simply being honest. If I gave Collin any part of me, there was no doubt I’d have my heart shattered into a million tiny fragments.
Collin wasn’t the kind of man who made promises. He wasn’t the kind of man you dreamed of spending forever with. That was a fact I had accepted and would exert no amount of energy to change. I understood I was beginning to care for Collin, but I cared more for the wellbeing of my already very fragile heart. For right now, Collin was helping me move past the death of my brother. He was my friend and regardless of what my dreamy emotions thought I wanted, I knew what I needed. And that wasn’t something hot and fast with Collin Donnelley.
Collin dipped his head low to whisper in my ear. “You think I’d break your heart?”
“I know you would.” I replied factually as I watched Jackson walk toward a girl who’d just entered the house. I didn’t recognize the girl, but she was really very pretty and I could see from all the way on the other side of the house that she had one of those infectious smiles. She reminded me of a few of my girlfriends back home in Toronto. Unlike me, they played their hearts in the gamble of the search for forever.
The girl wore a little too much makeup for my liking, but most girls did. Apart from a slight dusting of cover-up and a sweep of mascara, I didn’t wear makeup. Her blond hair was big, definitely backcombed to stand higher and it was long. She had dainty features and a loud voice, with a laugh, that I now could confirm, was one to turn heads. Literally. As soon as Collin heard the sound, he turned, and his emerald eyes landed on the girl.