Tales Of A RATT (49 page)

I had my witnesses together in short order, and they all made prepared statements on my behalf.

Jon Jensen, my good friend, and Ashley’s employer told the courts in his statement that, “Without making any comments regarding Ashley’s performance at work, in her personal life I have found her to be a very immature and manipulative person. My history of interactions with her also leads me to believe that her main interest in Bobby has been to further her ambitions to be an actress by leveraging his name, influence, access, and contacts. I have shared a lot of personal time with the two, both individually and jointly, and I have never seen Bobby physically harm or threaten her, or anyone else for that matter.”

His statement was a long one, but he wraps up with, “My observation has been that when Ashley gets what she wants, she’s good to him. When she doesn’t get what she wants, she extends every effort to slander his name and reputation, and to make him miserable through her verbal harassment and mean-spirited and sometimes threatening text messages. … I believe this Restraining Order is another attempt at revenge for his refusal to accept her back into his life. Subsequent to both his arrest, and most recently serving him with the Temporary Restraining Order, Ashley has enthusiastically shared with random employees in my Company, how she’s punished Bobby. She is enjoying this thoroughly as if it’s the best thing that ever happened to her. I know with certainty that a restraining order against Bobby is not necessary, it’s not within his character and he has moved on.”

Another friend of ours, Michael Smith, said this to the courts, “I think Ms. Saint’Onge realized the end of the relationship was imminent and out of spite/anger intentionally attempted to provoked Mr. Blotzer into a confrontation with the premeditation of making claims that would damage his reputation and career. Upon seeing that the DA didn’t agree with her accusations nor any evidence to support such claims she has now gone to another step in defaming Mr. Blotzer’s name and reputation by asking for a “restraining order”against him. I feel it is clear that Mr. Blotzer would be more than happy to NEVER contact Ms. Saint’Onge again but a “restraining order” against Mr. Blotzer is not deserved nor warranted.”

Finally, my good friend Jenna Stulak O’Connor had this to say, “Though all couples argue/fight as that is normal, I have never seen Bobby get physically abusive with any of them, including Ashley. I have to be honest and state that I have never been able to bond with Ashley as I think she is very odd and immature. I have been out with them on several occasions where she seems to try to provoke an argument if he does not agree with her odd perspective on situations. I could give many examples of her odd and immature behavior, including her calling him stupid in front of a group of his friends / people on several occasions, roller her eyes at him, etc… Coming from a girl who still wants Disney sheets on her bed…”

Ashley was permitted to cross examine my witnesses, and they held up fine. I cross examined hers, and they did not. After all was said and done, the judge verbally berated Ashley on a number of issues, and found in my favor.

No restraining order. More importantly, no Ashley. I don’t hate her; not at all. But, the love is gone. I don’t regret it, either. Ashley and I were good for a while. I can’t speak for her, but my love was genuine, and for a while, a felt hers was as well. I just think it was tainted with her own selfish motivations, and her intense desire to be “The Princess.” I hope she finds the help she needs, and grows up.

Grows up without me, thank you very much.

At this point, I’m seeing someone new. She’s beautiful, and an amazing woman. She’s got her own money, her own life, and doesn’t “need” me to justify herself. She can do that on her own very well. Will it go well? Is she the one? Who knows? But, I intend to find out, because when love is good, it makes up for those times when it isn’t. Makes up for them, and justifies them all at once.

I can’t wait to find those answers because my life is better for the experiences, remember?

I will admit, with all of the relationships I’ve had since Jeni, they all have the same bitches and gripes about me. I sometimes have tendencies that get on their nerves. I’ll get a little loaded. I’ll listen to my music until four in the morning…loudly. I don’t drink hard liquor anymore, because I become a bit of a weirdo. I’m not violent, or anything like that, but I’ll get kooky. No doubt. So, I stick to Coors Light, wine, and a few Jager-Bombs. No harm, no foul.

What I’ve learned, though, is that the Princess Syndrome holds solid with the majority of women in this world. They feel that men owe them a living. We don’t. At least I don’t, obviously, especially with the women I’ve been with. Misty and Ashley were the worst at that. Jeni and Misty2 always contributed, so it wasn’t much of a problem.

I’m trying to be less controlling in my relationships, because that’s been a problem that’s come back to bite me in the ass a few times. For instance, I’ll give them my opinion on what they are wearing, but I’ve learned not to volunteer the information.

There’s something about looking at a woman and saying, “You’re not going to wear that, are you?,” that is guaranteed to ruin your night. It’s not what they want to hear. Creates major waves.

The same week as the Ashley arrest bullshit, we had scheduled a party at the house for a bunch of our friends. Of course, Ashley didn’t attend, which led to the avalanche of questions that concerned friends will tend to do upon hearing of a failed relationship.

I was having a hard time with that party. I just didn’t want to be there, and was really down.

When the phone rang, I figured it was nothing big and could probably let it go to the answering machine. Instead, I picked up, and my little brother Michael was on the other end.

My step-father, Pete, was dead.

It wasn’t an unexpected thing. I’d known for sometime that it was coming, and had even told Michael to be prepared for it. Pete was a heavy smoker and had been on oxygen for a while. He went out much the same way my Mum did two and a half years earlier.

I didn’t know how to feel about it. It was weird, in that Pete and I were never really close, and he certainly didn’t look over his shoulder very long when he took Michael and left Carol and I to live next door to the whacked-out Mexican.

But, still…he was the only father I could remember. Now he’s gone. It’s the closing of an era in my life. My parents are gone.

I didn’t make it to the funeral.

My goal in this point in my life is to take what I have left, maximize it and have something worthy to leave for my sons. Hopefully, it's something substantial. Hopefully, this latest run with RATT will last longer than the first one, and we all retire with smiles on our faces, because when it's done, it's done.

I want my boys to take the fruits of my life and use them for their own successes. With any luck, my boys will be smart with what I leave them. They'll be smarter than I was with all the money I've made.

Money is fun to spend, and everyone knows that. But I'd advise anyone who owns their own business, or has a lot of money, stick some of that shit back for retirement, because it comes up on you a lot quicker than you expect.

I want to say a special thanks to everyone out there that has always come out and supported RATT and our music. We can't thank you enough for supporting us and our art. We'll keep doing this as long as you keep supporting us. I'll keep doing this as long as we can keep our shit together in RATT, which is NOT EASY, let me tell you. It's a love/hate relationship. I love the guys, but sometimes I really hate them too. Thankfully, I love them more than the hate stuff. Hopefully that sentiment is returned. Hopefully.

I'm looking forward to another 15 years with RATT.

Hopefully, we're all smart enough to stick with this, and do the right things for our families, and ourselves. None of us would be nearly as successful without RATT as we are with it. None of us would be bigger than RATT on our own.

I hope we don't fuck it up for everybody, because we've tried other things on an individual basis. Stephen has toured solo. Warren and I have worked other projects. It doesn't work out as well. A lot of bands go through this. Aerosmith went through it. It's just the way things are.

That's how the universe works for bands.

RATT headlining Nokia Time Square, 2009.

Father and Son (Michael), tour 2009

Me and Jon Jensen skiing in Lake Tahoe, 2010.

The Chinese Zodiac runs on a twelve-year cycle, and is based on various animals. 1984 was the year of the rat. It was also the year "Out of the Cellar" broke, and RATT conquered the 80s metal scene.

The cycle spun for another twelve years, and in 1996, we were once again in the year of the rat. That was the year RATT reunited and toured again, pulling us all out of the quagmire that was Nineties music.

Another dozen trips around the sun, and we were back, with all the usual acts of piracy. We blasted through a fantastic European tour. It was the year of the RATT!

Kinda… I had high hopes for 2008. I wanted it to be a blast off year for the band. We were working again, there were talks of a new record deal, and I was ready for it to be a platinum experience, similar to 1984, know what I mean?

Of course, the best laid plans of RATTs and men often go awry, or something like that.

As usual, Stephen, Warren and I were at odds, and the wedge just kept getting deeper and deeper between us. We were all on different pages. Now, not to toot the proverbial horn, but I’m the most reasonable of the three of us when it comes to business. Face it, I have the most riding on this, but, our myriad of problems was crushing us, to tell the truth.

There was no real structure to the tour, just fly-out dates. There were a couple of runs through the House of Blues that were sold out; Anaheim, Hollywood, San Diego and Vegas (baby). Those were great shows. So nice, we did ‘em twice! But still, no real rhyme or reason to what we were doing. It’s shit like that which grates on me like nothing else.

The situation necessitated a new Operating Agreement between the three of us. Logic says, if the three original members can’t co-exist, neither will the band. We knew it when we first got back together, and that’s when we started working on the thing; way back in March of ’07.

By the time we signed the agreement, it was still March … fucking March of 2009! That’s how long it took to get this thing worked out and signed. It was brutal. Absolutely brutal. Among the many items in this agreement was a “Code of Conduct” that each of us had to agree to abide by. We just couldn’t get our collective shit together and be in agreement, and the future of all things “RATT” COUNTED on it!

For instance, the new record deal.

There was a record deal on the table with Road Runner Records, who handles Nickleback, Sammy Hagar, Candlebox, several others. Tom Lipsky offered us the deal in April 2008, but there was no way we could sign the offer until the Operating Agreement was worked out. Needless to say, we didn’t get the record deal signed for almost a full year.