Authors: Deborah Hughes
Paul nodded in understanding and held the door open for her. “I think it is a gift from God that when faced with something horrible, he brings a feeling of peace to help you through it.”
Once she settled comfortably in his car, she waited until he joined her before continuing their conversation. “But I never thought I would die. Don’t you think that’s odd?”
“Not really. I think in our soul we know when it is time to move on. Deep within your consciousness, you knew it was not time.”
“I’m really quite grateful about that. I have some things to straighten out here first.” She thought about Cole, knowing he was the only loose end she couldn't leave as it was.
Paul didn’t make any reply but a small smile played about his lips and when he caught Alyssa's eye, he gave her an everything-is-going-to-be-okay wink.
Despite her resolve to straighten things out with Cole and start on a path to peace, she was a bundle of nerves as they walked up the front steps to the church. A glance at her watch told her she was late. Cole was sure to say something about it and already she was bubbling with ideas on what to say should he do so. Not a good way to carry on a truce to be sure.
Since Paul was giving her curious glances, she pointed to her watch. “We’re a little late. Hopefully Trisha won't be too upset with me.”
The relief flooding her friend's face as they rushed down the aisle toward the small group standing at the end of it told her that she hadn't quite gotten to the point of being upset. But she had been a little worried.
“Al! Thank God. I thought you may have forgotten.” Trisha grabbed her arm and waved at Paul in greeting. “Hi, Paul. It’s good to see you again.” Giving Alyssa’s arm a tug, they joined Jack, Cole and Father Bowden near the alter.
As Alyssa took her place next to Cole, she couldn't help but notice how he'd watched their approach, his stance stiff with tension, a muscle twitching in his cheek. No doubt something was going on behind those enigmatic eyes of his.
Their gazes clashed and held. Alyssa’s stomach dipped so fast her breath hitched and she had to part her mouth in order to draw in more air. Everything that happened between them in the last few days passed through that glance. It was too much for her to face with so much going on. Now wasn't the time. Perhaps after the wedding they could talk and sort through it all.
Somehow she managed to tear her gaze away from him and settle on Trisha. Not that it mattered where she looked for her brain replayed those wild moments in Cole's arms, making it impossible to focus on anything her friend was saying. She just couldn’t shake the feel of his mouth or the heated pressure of his body sliding against hers, making her ache with need. Oh how she hated it that she was yearning for his touch all over again.
Hoping no one noticed the heat blooming in her cheeks, she kept her head lowered. More than anything, she did not want Cole to guess how profoundly he affected her.
Wondering at Alyssa's strange behavior, Cole watched as his sister caught her up on what was going on and wondered about the look they'd just shared. He had the distinct impression she was searching for something in his gaze...questioning all that had transpired between them. His heart thudded hard in response and he'd almost gone to her. But then her eyes pulled away from his and she now refused to look at him.
He stared at her bent head, willing her to look up. She didn't. What she did do was glance over at Paul.
When Trisha turned to speak with Jack about something, Cole gave Alyssa a nudge, finally gaining her attention. “I'm surprised you remembered to join us. Last I heard, you were resting.” He spoke that last with such a snide undertone that even he cringed inside. Although he wished he'd just kept his big mouth shut, he thought for sure it would get her dander up. At this point he'd be happy to be on the receiving end of a sharp retort. But the ploy didn't work. Between that and the fact she'd brought her boyfriend along, he wanted to lash out his frustration and settled for lobbying a pot shot instead. The only thing he accomplished was a bout of self-disgust. Where had all his good intentions gone?
Trisha spared him an uneasy glance. “Cole, you are going to remember where we are and what we promised, right?”
Alyssa thought back to what Paul said about changing the pattern and decided to give it a go. “He has a point, Trisha. I was late and I’m very sorry.” She cast Cole a quick apologetic glance, her shoulders shrugging slightly as she waved a hand in appeal to Father Bowden. “I'm here now so let’s get the show started, shall we?”
If the roof had caved in, Cole couldn’t have been more surprised. What was happening here? No sarcastic retorts? No subtle digs? His eyes traveled to Paul and narrowed with a speculation that didn't sit easy with him. No doubt he was the reason for her sudden change of behavior. Just as he had to be the reason she was late. Cole curled his hands into fists as he fought to remain calm. So a new phase in their relationship was about to unfold. Something told him he was going to care for this one even less.
When the next half hour went by without the usual tension springing up between them, Alyssa had to admit that perhaps Paul was right. Her choosing not to toss back a sharp retort to Cole's annoyance over her being late had changed the playing field. Instead of volleying insults at one another, they were actually being quite amicable. A good thing since they were in church.
Trisha and Jack wanted to incorporate mass into their wedding so there was a little more to the ceremony to remember. As the rehearsal progressed, a blooming sadness began to surge through Alyssa's soul. It was suddenly hitting home to her how different everything was going to be from this point on. Trisha's marriage was going to change a lot of things. With a husband and baby to occupy her time, she would not have as much of it to spend with her. The prospect made her feel lonely all of a sudden.
Though her head was bowed and she was staring blindly at the maroon carpet, she somehow sensed that Cole was watching her and turned her head to see if that was truly the case. To her complete and utter surprise, he gave her an understanding smile, as if he understood what she was thinking. Alyssa’s heart surged, skipped a beat or two then settled into heavy thudding. The words Paul said to her earlier sprang into her thoughts.
“If you change, Alyssa, Cole will be forced to do the same.
”
How true that was turning out to be. But was she ready for such a change? Could she handle it?
“Well, I think we’ve covered everything.” Father Bowden smiled indulgently as he watched the two lovebirds “practice” their kiss.
“So what’s the verdict, Jack? Are her tonsils really going to be okay?” Alyssa couldn’t help but tease them.
“Tonsils is it? I thought he was verifying she still had all her teeth!” Cole grinned as the two broke apart and Trisha laughingly swatted at his arm.
Alyssa’s smile grew until she, too, was laughing. Her amusement quickly faded, however, when Trisha, Jack and Cole looked at her as if she’d suddenly sprouted horns on her head. Her hand flew to her face. “What? Do I have a smudge or something?”
Trisha gave her a warm hug, squeezing her tightly. “It’s good to hear you laugh,” she whispered in her ear. “And with Cole in the same room no less!”
Alyssa pulled away from her, deciding now was the time to make good on her promise to Paul. “Trisha, I need to talk to you for a moment.”
Intrigued, Trisha linked arms with her and they walked a short distance away in order to speak in private. “What is it, Al?”
“I want to explain about Paul.”
Trisha’s eyes lit with interest. “Yes?”
“He’s studying to be a priest, Trisha. Paul and I are good friends, nothing more. I should have told you sooner. I’m sorry.”
Trisha just stood there and stared at her. Then she started to laugh. “A priest?” Shaking her head, she chuckled some more. “Well that explains it. He’s very polite, caring, and …” She shrugged. “You know what I mean. I had wondered.”
“He’s a wonderful man. He’s going to make a wonderful priest someday, which is soon I believe.” She glanced toward the back of the church and waved. Paul smiled and waved back. “You’ll let Jack know … and Cole?”
“Yes, yes of course. I don’t understand why you kept it such a secret, though.” She glanced back at Paul and wiggled her fingers. He nodded and waved back. Trisha sighed. “He’s so handsome, such a shame he’s to be a priest.”
Alyssa laughed. “You say that as if it is such a terrible thing. Paul has a lot of love to give everyone. He’s very understanding. He’s going to be a wonderful priest and his parishioners are going to be very lucky to have him.”
“I just can’t image going through life and never getting married or having kids.” Trisha lovingly rubbed her belly and glanced back at Jack who was talking with Father Morgan. He caught her glance and smiled, giving her a wink as well.
Alyssa started back toward the men. “Paul says only those who are called to the priesthood can understand how they can go through life without marriage and children. They are married to the church, to God, and all the parishioners become their children.”
As soon as they were close enough for the men to hear them, Alyssa dropped the subject. She didn’t want to be around to discuss Paul’s chosen profession when Trisha told them. She wasn’t sure how Cole was going to react and she didn’t want Paul around to witness it if he decided to be snide or condescending. “Listen, Paul and I are going for coffee. Would any of you like to join us?”
Trisha and Jack nodded regretfully. “We have to stop by my parents’ tonight.” Jack leaned down to kiss her cheek. “But thanks for inviting us.”
“Cole?” Alyssa forced herself to look at him.
Emotion flared momentarily in his eyes, one Alyssa couldn't name, but then his lips firmed as if a sudden unpleasant thought had just occurred to him and he shook his head. “Thank you but no. I have a date.”
Alyssa expelled her pent-up breath and schooled her features so as not to show the disappointment she was feeling. “Well, you all have a great evening then.” Waving a hand in farewell to Father Bowden, she turned and hurried down the aisle to where Paul stood waiting.
“Is everything all right, Alyssa?” Paul held her jacket out and helped her slip it on.
She turned around to face him, her hands busy with the buttons, her head bent in feigned concentration to the small task. “Yes of course. Why?”
“You seem disturbed about something.”
Cole had a date? With Serena? Shaking unwanted images away, she smiled brightly and patted his cheek. “Nothing is bothering me. Are you ready for some coffee?”
Paul placed a hand at her back as they headed for the door. “Quite. And if there’s anything you want to talk about, I’m ready for that too.”
Whatever would she do without her dear friend? She stopped to look at him, a serious look in her troubled blue eyes. “Do you know how much I love you, Paul?”
“About as much as I love you I imagine.” He smiled gently and bent to kiss her forehead. “Come on, let’s go find a cozy restaurant that serves hot apple pie. I’ve been suffering a pang for it lately.”
Cole watched from the doorway, unnoticed, but then they were too wrapped up in each other to see him. His hands curled into fists as he fought to control the turbulent emotions raging through him. He'd decided to accept her offer to join them for coffee but then he heard their declaration of love and went still as death. For a moment he couldn’t even breathe. His chest felt tight and he put a hand there, pressing against the pressure. Was it true? Could they be in love already? Their obvious affection for each other sounded quite genuine. His mind reeled in an emotional tailspin. Why he was so disturbed, he didn’t know. He just knew he didn’t like it. Not one single bit. Not only that but a feeling close to pain tugged at his heart as he watched them leave. Part of him wanted to rush after them, hone in on their evening and separate them, but another part of him said it would be a fool's errand. He passed a tired hand across his eyes. Why did he tell Alyssa he had a date? He told his parents he might stop by later. That hardly constituted a date. Running a hand through his hair, he closed his eyes and drew in a deep breath. Hell, but he could use a drink. A nice stiff one. Perhaps that’s just what he’d do.
“Cole? Are you okay?” Trisha’s concerned voice interrupted his thoughts and he opened his eyes to give her a lopsided grin.
“I’m just as fine as I can possibly be. See you kids later.” He wasted no time in escaping out the door and away from his sister’s perceptive eyes.
Trisha watched her brother leave the church with a small smile playing about her lips.
Jack’s eyes narrowed in question. “What’s going on in that scheming little head of yours, sweetheart?”
“Jack, Paul is studying to be a priest.” She delivered the words softly, a preoccupied look in her eyes.
“A priest!” Jack started to laugh. “Does Cole know?”
“No. And I’m not going to tell him just yet.” She turned to Jack and placed a hand on his arm. “Cole is jealous of Paul. I know he is. Let him stew with those feelings for a while.” She stared at the door her very disturbed brother had just barely managed to close without a solid slam. “Cole and Alyssa like each other more than either of them want to admit. It is time they both come to realize it.”
“Just what are you hoping, Trisha?”
She shook her head, pulling herself from the possibilities swirling within it, and smiled at him with feigned innocence. “I’m just thinking that I want them to be the way it was. In the beginning, before they began to fight.”
Jack’s eyes searched Trisha’s. “You aren’t hoping those two hook up are you?” He gave a small wince of imagined pain. “It would be a stormy relationship. I’m not sure we could weather through it.”
Trisha laughed with amusement. “You didn’t see them seven years ago. Alyssa adored my brother and he thought the world of her.”
“That was seven years ago, sweetheart, a lot has happened since then,” Jack cautioned.
“Don’t look so worried, Jack. Trust me, I know both of them very well. Better than they know themselves or each other.” She laced her small hand through his. “Come on, let’s go see your parents.”