Temporary Father (Welcome To Honesty 1) (11 page)

“And Van wouldn’t help?”

She went for the car door. “This talk is turning too personal. I have a son to care for and a house and a business to build, and your life is waiting for you in D.C.”

“Let me talk to Van.”

“No one needs to talk to Van.”

“Then explain. He’d never let you go without. Especially when it comes to money. When he has all he’ll need and then some. I don’t see it.”

“Leave it alone, Aidan. Now you’re talking about my family.”

His self-deprecating laugh stopped her from leaving. “Remember what we know about each other. I don’t walk away from trouble, and you were born to nurture.”

“I wasn’t.”

“You try to be tougher than you are, according to Eli.”

“I’m rebuilding my home. That and the thought of my son being ill are all that matters to me now.”

“I wish you were brave enough to take a chance on me. I’m good for more than delivering keys.” He started toward his own car, and then looked over his shoulder. “You wouldn’t want to tell me how Eli’s visit went?”

He had a right. He’d found her son and made her see she had to act.

“I liked today’s doctor. Eli didn’t.”

“Didn’t?”

“I thought she was perfect. He thought she was like me.” Despite her iron will and perfect independence, she felt like crying. That must have shown, too.

Laughing, Aidan came back. She didn’t realize he was going to reach for her until he did.

“He’s just a kid,” Aidan said against her hair.

She tried to hold back, but he didn’t seem to realize he shouldn’t offer comfort. She leaned against him, just a little, not enough to commit. “I love that boy more than my own life, but he’s killing me.”

“He’ll straighten things out with a therapist who can help him. And you can come talk to me if you won’t speak with a counselor. I promise not to assume you want more than talk.”

The truth lay between them, seductive and for
bidden. Their need for each other was growing despite any fight she put up.

“Trust me a little, Beth.”

“I’m trying.”

His mouth tightened, and he let her go. Contrarily, she wished he hadn’t.

“That ex-husband of yours has a lot to answer for. I’m even more pissed when I think of him leaving you and Eli high and dry. And I’m still surprised at Van.”

“Don’t be. You’re right about Van. He begged me to let him help, but I’m allergic to charity, especially from someone who loves me. Eli needs to see me take out a loan and pay it back. We can work on our own house—even if he has been skating out.”

“He ducks out of helping?” Aidan shoved his hands into his pockets and laughed at her affront. “Sorry, but he’s usually so grown up he scares me.”

“He’s the best,” she said, “but he’s a kid. Hanging out with his friends is a lot more entertaining than helping me tear down a house. Aidan?”

He nodded.

“You have to leave him alone. He’s getting attached to you.”

Anger forced his eyes into slits. Then something made him look over her shoulder. “Maybe we should go. One of those guys has been watching us for a while, and I don’t want people talking about you.”

“Any chance he’s admiring the pear trees? The
last thing we need to do is fire up the gossip machine.”

“I’m not sure anyone up there is a pear-tree kind of guy.” Aidan stared into the woods, turning his back on the semi-orchard in question. “Which ones are they?”

“P
ICK UP
,
PICK UP
,
pick up, Dad.” Eli hit his desk so hard Lucy raised her head to stare at him with sad eyes. “Sorry,” he said.

She dropped her head onto her paws.

At last, there was a click and his father said hello.

“Dad?”

“Eli, hey, son. How ya been?”

“Okay, okay. I’ve been trying to call you all day.”

“I know. I had some—business. I would have called you back.”

“I called you at your work, but they said you quit again.”

“I had a better offer. You gotta go where the money is, man.”

Yes.
Talk about great news. His dad had more money now. “I’m glad.” Eli tried not to jinx himself, sounding happy. “I have a favor to ask.”

“What kind of favor?”

“I was at Jeff’s yesterday.”

“Again? Where was your mom?”

“Working on the house. Listen, Jeff’s father is
going to help him make his own skateboard—a custom skateboard, and he said he’d help me, too, if I bought a kit.”

“What does your mom say?”

“I didn’t ask her. I know she doesn’t have the money, but maybe you could help me.”

“Well, you know, I’m just starting this new gig.”

“New what?”

“Job. And money is short.”

“You said you’ll make more.”

“I won’t get paid for a few weeks, maybe longer. And you know how much I have to give your mom. I’m strapped.”

“When I start getting allowance again, I’ll pay you back, but I have to get the kit now, and I don’t have enough saved. I need about forty dollars.”

“How much have you saved, son?”

“Seventy. Mom made me put it in the bank so I was lucky. It didn’t get burned up.”

“That was smart. Sounds like you could lend me some dough, buddy.”

“Huh?”

“Just kidding. Kidding, but you talk to your mom about this skateboard thing. Isn’t that why I give her money?”

“I should’ve known you’d make up reasons not to help me. And you’re crazy if you think I don’t know you don’t want to give Mom anything.” He hung up, gasping like a fish jerked out of the lake, half expecting his father to call right back and yell at him.

He didn’t.

Eli dropped onto his back on the bed and pulled the comforter completely around himself. In the dark, he didn’t care if he cried. His mom couldn’t get scared. His dad couldn’t tell him to be a man.

The dark felt good, cool and empty. It made him feel safe. No one could see him. He couldn’t even see himself.

He climbed off the bed, pulling the comforter with him and covered Lucy with it, too. She struggled, but he wrapped an arm around her neck and she stayed.

“Thanks, girl.” He laid his head against her belly, and her breathing made him feel better, but he made sure no light could get to her or him.

“Why, Lucy?” he asked. “Jeff’s father’s not rich, but he helped Jeff buy his. Why won’t my dad?” Lucy grunted. “Maybe Mom?”

He couldn’t even ask. He’d burned down the house. She wouldn’t take the money he’d saved, but he’d bet she wouldn’t let him spend it, either.

“Eli?”

Her voice came from downstairs. He rolled out of the blanket and threw it toward the bed. Then he stared at the window. This house didn’t have a roof that sloped all the way to the ground. He couldn’t jump down and escape.

But there was his closet.

Hurrying, he tripped over a corner of the comforter and almost fell. Lucy grunted, but she didn’t
raise her head this time. He opened the closet door and jumped inside.

Darkness wrapped him up again.

“E
LI
?” Beth tapped on his door and then opened it. Lucy looked up from the floor. “Where’s Eli, girl?”

Lucy only stared. Beth walked inside and looked behind the door. She found a pair of shoes and Eli’s jacket, which he hadn’t worn in days. No boy, though. Butterflies danced in her belly.

The desk chair was pulled away from the desk. The comforter lay half on the floor, which was odd because he’d been good about making his bed before Mrs. Carleton could get to it.

“No need to panic, huh, Lucy?”

Lucy still stared.

Beth remade the bed. She’d only called him to make sure he was out of the way while she used the phone. “I’ll look for him after I talk to Campbell.”

She went downstairs and opened the front door. Mrs. Carleton walked behind her with a dusting cloth.

“Have you seen Eli?” Beth asked.

“Not for a while. You chase after that boy too much.”

“So I keep hearing.”

“Let him alone and he’ll show up. Any boy likes to go out to the woods. Where’s the dog?”

“In his room.” She’d love to believe he was roaming the woods. Just the other night, it had been
chilly, still more winter than spring, but a few days’ sunlight and warmth had changed the world. The trees were beginning to clothe themselves in leaves. The air here and at the lodge smelled of honeysuckle.

“She’s in his room, but he’s not?” Mrs. Carleton dusted a table stridently. “That’s different, but he has worried about taking her outside since the accident.”

“I’ll look for him in a few minutes. I have to make a phone call.”

The other woman went about her business. Beth went into Van’s office to get the phone from his desk. Dialing Campbell’s number, she went outside, onto the porch. He finally picked up as she turned the corner on the verandah to the back of the house.

“Eli, I told you, I can’t—”

“You called him? Campbell, I’m so glad. Did you make plans already?” For once, she hadn’t needed to remind him this was his weekend.

“Beth.”

In the time he took to say her name, she recovered her grasp of reality. “Did you tell him you couldn’t pick him up again?”

“Not yet, but you tell him for me. I hate to disappoint him.”

“You hate to? But it’s okay for me to do your dirty work? What did you talk to him about?”

“Do you have to know every word that passes between me and my son?”

“Right now, yes. No matter what you think, something is wrong with him, and you’re not helping.”

“He just called me, and he sounded fine. Give the guy a break.”

“Thanks, Campbell. Great advice, as always.”

“I don’t have to take this.”

“You do have to help take care of your son. Why don’t you want to see him?”

“I told him already, but I’m about to start a new job.”

“A new job?” That fish story had lost its luster years ago. “You quit again.”

“Quit? I’m moving on to something better.”

Story of his life, and pointless to call him on it. “You’re working this weekend?” What a joke. He’d never take a job that interfered with his precious weekends. Too many parties to attend—where he mooched off the friends he’d managed to keep.

“You always assume the worst.”

She went farther around the porch, not wanting even Mrs. Carleton to hear. Her shoes thudded as if she’d suddenly gained fifteen pounds. The weight of anger.

“You quit another job because they were garnishing your wages for child support. How is paying to help keep Eli in clothing and food some kind of an option for you? Why don’t you want to keep him safe and put a roof over his head?”

“I’m not perfect like you.”

“If I were perfect, I’d never have fallen for your game.” She took a deep breath. “This gets us nowhere, and I have to find Eli. You won’t be paying
child support this month and you won’t be picking him up this weekend?”

“I told you, I can’t.”

“You’d better be careful. Your son is feeling doubt about everything in his life. What will you do if he stops believing you love him? How long do you think I can cover for you?”

She hung up before he came up with another daydream to pass off as the truth. Talking to him grew more pointless with each passing month. His skull had to be as thick as the delusions he harbored to keep from hating himself.

A
FTER HIS MOTHER
clicked the phone off, Eli did likewise. He set the extension on the desk, staring at the receiver. Feeling nothing.

Plenty of nothing. Which was worse than being sad. Maybe it was the biggest sadness.

He left even Lucy behind as he stumbled to the door. He had to go.

Outside. Somewhere. Had to find more darkness than the closet or the blanket.

At the top of the stairs, he stopped, surprised to see the open front door. Static had cut in and out on his mom’s side of her talk with his dad. She’d been outside, trying to hide the truth about his father.

He’d always known. Some place inside him that held on to all the sadness he couldn’t stop feeling.

At the door, he searched from side to side.

She wasn’t there. He ran down the porch stairs and headed down the driveway. The woods. Bushes and flowers and stuff. Plenty of places to crawl inside.

But he turned the curve in the driveway and heard keyboard keys, clicking fast.

Aidan was typing away on his laptop on the cottage porch. Right beside him, he had a glass of something that made Eli lick his lips. He’d never been more thirsty.

“Hey, Aidan.”

“Hey.” He stood up. No smile. He didn’t want company, either.

Tears twisted Eli’s gut. Men didn’t cry.

His own father hated him, never wanted to see him. It just piled up and piled up, hurting. And now his dad wouldn’t even help with the one thing he wanted most. Eli couldn’t see an end to his problems.

“What brings you down here?” Aidan asked.

“I don’t know.” He swallowed. It was hard to do. “What are you doing?”

“Work.” He crossed his arms. “So I can’t talk long. Did you tell your mother you were coming?”

The equivalent of “go talk to your mom.” The same thing his dad always said. Aidan kicked a pile of gravel. He drove everyone he liked away. No one wanted him around anymore but his mom.

“Eli? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” He plastered a big smile on his face and backed away from the porch, giving the glass
whose outside was speckled with water one last look. “I’m going to play in the woods.”

“Do you have friends coming?”

“No.”

“Call someone.”

“Now you sound like my mom.”

Eli ran through the gravel, snickering as it flew up from his heels. With any luck, it’d fly up onto the porch and hit that guy’s laptop.

He ran into the woods.

W
HAT KIND OF MAN
chased a needy kid away—even when that was what his mother wanted? Aidan lasted about ten more minutes at his laptop before he shut the lid, cursing.

Beth was wrong. If Eli needed company, he couldn’t turn the boy away. He wasn’t crying wolf. He needed help, and a few minutes of Aidan’s time wouldn’t hurt him or break Nikolas Enterprises.

He followed Eli’s path through the woods. Even since he’d arrived in Honesty, the weather had warmed and the plants filled out. The shrubbery seemed to close in, bunching up to keep out intruders.

A sudden crack stopped him. Another pellet gun?

A groan got him moving again.

He found the clearing quickly. To his horror, he also found Eli on the ground, a broken branch looped with his leather belt beside him. The other end of his belt was around his neck.

Two tarnished letters emblazoned the buckle, CT. It was his father’s belt and plenty long enough to strangle him if that branch had been long and strong enough.

“Eli.” He dropped to his knees, staring at the boy’s blue face. The cold, wet ground penetrated when no thought would come.

Eli’s chest was still. So still he reminded Aidan of Madeline.

Not again. Not again.

“Son?” He tilted the boy’s head back—gently. What did a broken neck look like? “No one else dies on me, Eli, so you’d better start breathing.”

The child’s airway was clear. Aidan started CPR.

As he stopped breathing to apply pressure to Eli’s chest, he yanked his phone out of his pocket and dialed 911 before tucking it between his ear and shoulder.

An operator answered. He kept pumping. “Get an ambulance out to the cottage at 1544 Post Road. Tell them to listen for me yelling. A boy’s tried to hang himself, and I’m giving him CPR.”

Letting the phone drop, he breathed for Eli again. As he straightened to pump, he started yelling. Beth’s name.

Again and again.

A woman screamed close by. He turned his head toward the sound. She couldn’t see them yet through the damn trees, but she knew.

“Beth, over here.”

He breathed again. Beth burst into the clearing, reminding him oddly of the night he’d first arrived.

With leaves in her hair and horror in her eyes, she ran at them, collapsing at her son’s side, her face wet.

Aidan pushed her hands away. “His neck,” he said, and started breathing again.

“Let me.” She shoved at his shoulders. “Your heart.”

He finished the breathing cycle before he answered. “I’ll stop if I feel anything. Pick up my phone. See if anyone’s still there.”

She shook her head, staring at her son. “Make him breathe. Make him breathe!”

As if Eli heard her, his chest expanded, on its own.

“Eli?” Thank God. He leaned over the boy’s face, praying for the warm whoosh of air moving out of his lungs.

“He did it again.” Beth lay on the ground, curving her arm around her son’s head. “Keep on, baby. Breathe some more.” Her voice could not have been sweeter, more filled with kindness. “You have to live, buddy. Please want to live.”

The small—too small—surely he’d never looked so small before—chest rose again.

“I think he’s doing it. I’m going to the driveway, Beth. Make sure he doesn’t stop.” He picked up his phone. “Are you there?”

The woman who’d answered him before said hello again.

“I can give you details now. Is someone coming?”

“Yes, sir. An ambulance is on the way. Did I hear you say Eli is breathing on his own?”

“How did you know it was Eli?”

“Do you think anyone in this town doesn’t know who lives at 1544 Post Road?”

“His mother’s still with him. I’m going to wait by the driveway so they’ll know where to stop.”

“You left Beth alone?”

“I didn’t want to leave either of them.”