Tess and the Highlander (18 page)

Unfortunately, James took that exact moment to
approach them. “The afternoon is advancing, you two. If we are to
make it back to Benmore tonight…” He stopped, recognizing that he
had walked in at a bad time. “Am I interrupting something?”

“Aye, you are.”

“Nay, you are not.”

Colin and Tess had spoken at the same time. James
looked curiously from one to the other.

Tess shook her head at Colin before turning to
James. “I should like to stay, but at the same time my mother is
expecting me to be at Benmore. If, by chance, she herself would
travel to the Highlands…well, I doubt she would ever come to
Ravenie Castle. And yet, I am concerned about leaving. I think we
are needed here.”

Colin was far from ready to leave her here by
herself. “Now that the Lindsays have formed a clan council, they
will keep things here under control in your absence. However, we
can also leave behind a few of our own men to help and assist them
until you get back.”

“Thank you,” she said quietly. “I think we should
plan on spending the night here, though. Would that be any
problem?”

“Nay, Tess,” James replied. “No problem at all.”

Her eyes, taking on a worried look, scanned the
villagers. She nodded absently and walked toward a group nearest to
them. The old woman called Bella was at the center of the group,
and Tess went directly to her.

Colin realized he must have been too absorbed in his
attention to Tess, for James seemed to have repeated a question
that he hadn’t heard even the second time.

His older brother poked him in the ribs. “Why don’t
you admit it and be done with it?”

“Admit what?”

“That you are in love with her.”

No denial rose to his lips.

James let out a low whistle. “Come now, brother.
While you’re at it, admit that you want to spend the rest of your
life with her. Marriage, children, happily ever after. You know
there is nothing that says the youngest son cannot marry
first.”

Colin turned abruptly and strode away. James
followed.

“I never thought I’d see the day, but you are far,
far gone…and don’t deny it. You were probably sunk the moment she
dragged you out of the water.”

For some reason, James’s words lacked the note of
ridicule that Colin would have expected.

“So what are you doing tormenting yourself and her?
‘Tis obvious that she wants you…perhaps loves you back, for all I
know of such things.”

“The whole damn thing is too complicated,” Colin
snapped, his tone harsher than he’d intended. “I don’t have time to
worry about such foolishness now.”

James’s large hand landed on Colin’s shoulder. The
older brother’s gray eyes were deadly serious when Colin looked at
him.

“You don’t want to be spending the rest of your life
regretting this moment.” James lowered his voice. “Don’t forget the
family that she springs from. Lowlanders and Highlanders. A
marriage by contract. Two unhappy, distant people thrown together
for the purpose of property. Why, not that I’m an expert, mind
you…but I think there’s not a shred of romantic feeling in that
whole arrangement. And I’ll tell you something else…”

Colin waited, frowning fiercely.

“Once her mother takes charge of the lass, not you
nor Tess herself will be deciding her future…
that’s
for
sure.”

Colin felt ill at the truth in James’s words.
Physically ill at the thought of losing her.

“If you don’t have time to work your way through
this ‘foolishness’ as you call it, then just think of what lies
ahead for her. Colin, lad, I’m not speaking lightly now. If this is
what you truly want for your future, don’t waste a moment.”

As the Lindsay clan folk celebrated their
liberation, Tess agonized over the thought that she’d practically
begged Colin to stay with her at Ravenie. Mortified, Tess made
certain that she didn’t have another moment alone with Colin for
the rest of day. Later, she gladly accepted Bella’s offer of
spending the night in her cottage.

Emotions were running high the next morning as they
prepared to leave the village. A half dozen of the Macpherson men
were to stay. It was clear to Tess, though, that the villagers were
feeling far different without the heavy lash of the steward hanging
over them.

She’d promised to come back after her meeting with
her mother. She believed she would. And she was relieved to know
that her people believed her, too.

“I know you have set your mind against it,” Colin
moved his horse next to hers as everyone mounted up. “But you
should at least consider riding up there and looking in at Ravenie
Castle before we leave.”

He was all seriousness this morning. Tess wished she
could have such tight control over her own emotions.

“And I am not suggesting it because I want to
persuade you to live up there instead of down here.” He was
speaking only to her. “The fire in that castle and the murder of
your father are a part of your past. There are decisions you will
need to make when you come back. I think you’ll have a much easier
time doing that if you have settled
everything
that hangs
over you from the past.”

Her first impulse was to reject his reasoning and
simply ride away, but common sense prevailed. Tess
was
curious about that night—about the fire and the attack.

Tess gave a nod of resignation. “Will you ride with
me?”

Colin’s tender look of agreement—the way he reached
over and gently squeezed her hand—only managed to confuse her more.
She loved him so much that it hurt to be around him, knowing the
end of their days together was in plain sight. Everything about
their situation was baffling. One moment, he was so aloof and
distant, and the next he could be so warm and compassionate.

“Can we see Ravenie Castle and then come back and
leave by the way of the village?” she asked finally. “When we leave
here, I want the last image I carry with me to be these people and
this place that I want to come back to. Not the place I have been
having nightmares about for so many years.”

He nodded. The devil take him, he thought, if he
didn’t win a prize for understanding. If he didn’t get a chance
soon to talk to her, though—to tell her how he felt—he’d surely
explode. By ’sblood, he’d felt like a tongue-tied fool yesterday
when she’d asked him to stay! And then, once he’d gathered his wits
about him, Tess had avoided him. It was obvious she had made
herself unavailable for the rest of last evening. And the night had
been hell. He had tossed and turned until almost dawn.

Colin looked around at the other men gathered
nearby. Now was not the time, either. Bloody hell. Shaking off his
brooding thoughts, he tried to focus on what they had ahead of them
this morning. Perhaps once she’d seen the castle, they’d have a
chance to talk.

After asking James to keep the men in the village,
the two of them rode up toward the castle.

Ravenie Castle was built on a rocky ledge surrounded
by a dry moat that surrounded the stout curtain walls. To get to
the bridge that led to the low arched entrance, they rode up a long
and winding road.

“Some of the history of this place will never be
truly known, I fear.” She spoke quietly, taking in the wild terrain
of the surrounding hills.

“You are talking about the attack on the castle.
About the night of your father’s murder.”

She nodded. “I asked Bella. There never have been
any credible answers to it. The Lindsays were not feuding with any
of our neighboring clans. As far as the villagers knew, Sir Stephen
was well liked and respected in the Highlands. Even more strange,
the attack came only on the castle and not on the village. In fact,
the people down there didn’t know anything about it until someone
saw the flames mounting up to the sky.”

“One would think that the castle would have been
better protected. I went up there last night.” Colin said. “There
is this ditch to cross, then a banded oak gate and a portcullis,
and armed gatekeepers. How could a group of men get inside the
walls unnoticed?”

“They didn’t just get inside the castle walls. They
were inside the laird’s chambers.” She shivered uncontrollably. “My
father was stabbed in the back. That tells me that they…they were
waiting for him. Maybe they were even there
before
he
arrived that night.”

“I have been asking some questions of my own since
yesterday, too.” Colin added. “Amid all the chaos of the fire and
the shouts of the laird’s murder, there was very little fighting.
This wasn’t a case of the castle coming under the siege and taken
by force. Nothing was taken. All that anyone remembers seeing
afterward was a half dozen men dressed in an array of Highland gear
fleeing into the night.”

“Unidentifiable Highland gear,” she repeated. “Bella
said no clan could be accused afterward. ‘Twas as if a band of
outlaws just appeared in the castle, murdered my father for no
apparent reason, and then disappeared.”

Their horses had slowed. Tess saw the drawn
portcullis and open gate of Ravenie Castle, and her heart started
drumming in her chest.

There were dark, pungent pools of stagnant water in
the ditch around the castle. She remembered the smell from her
childhood. As she started slowly toward the bridge, her gaze
traveled up the two stone towers facing the valley. The west tower
was visibly burned. That was where her father had been killed. Her
gaze never wavered from the blackened stones—from the slits of
windows where she could see the sky peering through from the other
side.

The wind blew in from the west and brought with it
the earthy smell of stables and horses. Smoke from a wood fire in
one of the chimneys reached Tess, and suddenly she found herself
drifting back in time.

She could smell the smoke—taste it, even. Tess
looked at the window where the laird’s chamber had been and could
see flames racing out. There were cries for help. Chaos surrounded
her with darkness and flashes of torchlight. Terrified, she wanted
to run.

Her horse pawed the ground, snapping Tess out of the
nightmarish state.

“I don’t think you shall want to desert this place
completely,” Colin offered, waving to servants who were coming out
of the doorway that Tess now remembered led to the Great Hall. She
touched her brow and found it covered with sweat. “Where ‘tis,
sitting here on the hill, the castle offers a clear view in every
direction. You need this for your own security and for the people
who live in the village below.”

She somehow managed to respond to the people’s
greeting, but remained on her horse, telling them that they needed
to be riding to Benmore Castle and wouldn’t be going into the keep.
As the workers moved off, Tess could feel her heart continuing to
pound. She turned to Colin.

“Do I need to do anything to the castle if ‘tis just
to be a place to keep watch?”

“Nay, you don’t need to do anything, but—”

“Very well. I have seen enough. Let’s go.”

He reached over and took the bridle of her horse
before she could turn away. “Your face is flushed. You are upset.
Talk to me, Tess.”

“I have nothing to say. Not here. I just want to
leave.” She could hear the note of terror in her voice. The
courtyard was too small. There wasn’t enough air. She tried to
wrench his hand off the bridle, but he wouldn’t let go. “I don’t
want to be here, Colin. I didn’t want to come. I want to go
now.”

“Come, Tess. Let’s get down from our horses. Show me
around this place.”

Temper arose in her. “I
want
to leave.”

“Aye. And you will…in time.” Completely disregarding
her anger, he dismounted and lifted her from her saddle, as
well.

As soon as Tess’s feet hit the ground, she started
walking straight for the gate. She heard his steps behind her, and
she broke into a run. He caught her just as she entered the stone
archway of the gate. She looked wildly toward the opening at the
other end. She could see the iron points of the portcullis hanging
ominously from the top.

“Let me go. I want to leave.”

Colin’s grip on her tightened. Tess felt trapped,
and she immediately became a wildcat in his arms. Punching him,
kicking him, she tried to break free, but he held her even
tighter.

She did not scream, as she didn’t want anyone to
hear them. She didn’t want her people to know that she was afraid
of this place.

“I’ll kill you when I get out of here,” she hissed
under her breath when he turned her in his arms, so she could face
him. “I will take you onto a ship and push you overboard myself.
And this time, I’ll let you drown.”

“Is that a promise?” The villain had the nerve to
taunt her.

Instead of answering him, Tess kicked him hard on
the shin. He winced but still did not let her go. Rather, he pulled
her deeper into the darkness of the entryway and pushed her back
against the hard stone. His body followed, pressing against her.
She tried to struggle again, but then stopped as the tears
began.

It was like an explosion of emotion in her, and one
she could not control. One moment she was fighting him, hating him
for bringing her here, and the next she was a sobbing mess, holding
on to him and burying her face against his chest.

He let her cry. He held Tess in his arms and let her
pour out the raw feelings. After some time, she realized that her
misery had found a new fuel.

She was taking comfort in another human being. She
was feeling the warmth of Colin’s touch on her back, and she was
nearly overwhelmed by the power of her own need. Holding him
tightly, Tess stared at the glimpse of skin beneath the open collar
of his shirt, at the solid pillar of his throat. Her hands inched
their way across his broad and muscular chest, feeling his strength
and his warmth.