Tess and the Highlander (20 page)

Colin went on with his ranting, and Alec Macpherson
leaned back heavily against the carving above the open hearth. When
his son turned away momentarily, the laird eyed his wife’s attempt
at keeping a serene expression on her face in spite of their son’s
obvious unhappiness. Sitting across the room, Fiona was trying to
look busy studying a drawing of a new storage barn she wished to
have built. But Alec knew his wife had not given the drawing a
moment’s thought since they’d begun to speak to Colin…and she
certainly wasn’t thinking about it now.

The armed band of men that had arrived late last
night were Burnetts, supposedly a distant kin to Tess’s mother.
With them, they had brought the cursed letter from Evelyn Lindsay,
requesting…nay, demanding that Tess be sent immediately to the
Borders in the company of these same men.

In a way, the laird had been happy that his sons had
not brought Tess back from Ravenie Castle last night. He had not
been looking forward to passing on the message. With good reason,
he thought now, watching his youngest son.

When they’d arrived, Alec had requested that Tess
come in to speak to them first. The lass had been quiet the whole
time that he had explained her mother’s wishes. As one would have
expected from a dutiful daughter, the young woman had only given a
curt nod to his statement that the Burnetts had orders to leave as
soon as possible. After that, she had practically run from the
chamber.

An instant later, Colin had stormed in, angry as a
wounded bear.

“How does Tess feel about all this?” Fiona’s quiet
question drew the laird’s gaze and momentarily silenced their
son.

“You and father talked to her. How do
you
think she feels?”

Alec Macpherson started to answer, but caught the
look Fiona was giving him and stopped. He’d seen this look before.
They needed a united position—and it would probably be a more
compassionate one than he was preparing to voice.

He shrugged. “The lass said nothing, Colin. She
didn’t say a word.” He looked at his wife. “And I have been trained
to read the unspoken language of only one woman. And that is your
mother.”

Fiona faced their son. “Are you telling us that you
have come here with all these complaints without any regard for
that child’s feelings?”

“She is no child, mother. Tess is seventeen.”

“Very well,” she conceded. “You’ve come in here
without knowing for certain the feelings of that young woman.
Colin, you have no right to assume or to accuse or to complain when
Tess might be perfectly happy with the arrangements made for her by
her mother.”

“But she is
not
happy,” he asserted
passionately. “She was crying when she left this room. She was very
upset.”

“Then perhaps you should go to her,” the laird
suggested. “I’ve always found that ‘tis wise to go to…”

“Before you go anywhere near her,” Fiona cut in,
“Perhaps you should first sort out in your own mind the confusion
that exists between you. ‘Tis always better to offer comfort when
one has a solution to a person’s problems.”

The laird almost asked ‘What confusion?’ but held
his tongue as the lad seemed to understand perfectly what his
mother was saying.

“I believe that has already been straightened
out.”

“Has it? And for how long?” Fiona pressed. “Is this
the heat of the moment speaking? A momentary lapse into some sort
of noble behavior?”

“I am speaking up because I love her.”

The laird’s head snapped in Colin’s direction.
“You…?”

“Love?” Fiona persisted. “Is this the love where two
people spend the rest of their lives together?”

“If she’ll have me.”

“And what of your other plans? Plans of strapping on
the sword of your ancestors. Years of sailing free? Of terrorizing
every Spanish merchantman and treasure ship? Of…”

“Father didn’t choose that path. He married and fell
in love and settled happily. What is wrong with that?”

“Fell in love and married.” Alec managed to get out
the words before the two went at it again. “We shouldn’t forget the
order here.”

His wife and son looked at him as if he’d just
entered the chamber. Something told him this was probably not the
best time to mention his tendency to become seasick.

“Go on. Go on,” Alec encouraged his wife.

She turned back to her son. “It matters naught what
your father did or didn’t do. What about
your
dreams?
Your
plans?”

“We change, we grow, and we dream new dreams.” Colin
responded passionately. “Whoever I was before and wherever I wanted
to go was shaped by what I had seen and where I had been. No dream
I ever had looked beyond the here and now. Permanence played no
part in my dreams. I know now that is because I had never found
anyone who affected me as Tess has. I have no regrets for letting
those dreams slip away. They could never make me happy now.”

He started pacing again impatiently before them. “I
know ‘tis difficult for you to understand, considering that I am
your youngest son. I know that the immature antics of my youth
could cause you to think I am not serious. But I love her. The
future means nothing to me if…”

“Stop right there. You should save this,” the laird
said solemnly, moving across the room and standing beside his
wife’s chair.

Colin’s expression showed his puzzlement as Alec
reached for Fiona’s hand and the two exchanged a knowing look. The
Macpherson chieftain recalled he had once been here himself, in
this same room, twenty-seven years ago, presenting the same
argument to his own parents.

“Colin, it makes us quite proud to hear how much you
have come to care for this young woman.” Fiona’s gray eyes sparkled
as she smiled at her husband before turning back to their son. “And
your arguments are very convincing.”

“When the right time comes, I believe you should use
these same words to win her over,” the laird added.

“I’m ready—”

“But considering her situation, if you were to
propose now, Tess might think you are acting out of a sense of duty
or honor.” Fiona shook her head. “And I do not believe that is any
basis for a lasting relationship.”

“Not to mention that ’twould be impossible to
explain any of this to Tess’s mother so soon.”

“Not that you are lacking in merit in any way.”
Fiona’s tone sharpened with maternal defensiveness. “True, Tess has
inherited a great deal of land, but you are a Macpherson and a
Drummond, and royal Stewart blood flows in your veins. You will not
lack for a fortune of your own, either, and you and Tess will
together lift the Lindsay clan out of the difficulties they have
long endured.”

“We’re not saying that your brothers wouldn’t be
glad to be rid of you.” The laird smiled at his son encouragingly.
“Nonetheless, you should wait a bit…at least until Tess is reunited
with her mother. The lass needs to settle her past before she plans
for the future.”

“Come now, child. This is not the end of the world!
You are going to visit your mother, and then you shall return to
us.”

Tess wished she possessed Lady Fiona’s certainty.
Wiping at her tears, she looked with embarrassment at the trunk
full of clothing that had been prepared for her departure. Her gaze
wandered to the velvet dress laid out on the bed, ready for her to
wear during her last dinner at Benmore Castle. These good people
planned everything for her—did everything for her.

When Tess had refused all help from the maidservants
in getting ready for dinner, Lady Fiona herself had come up to see
if she was well. And this was where she had found Tess, curled up
in the window seat, lost in her misery and unable to stop the
unending tears.

“Why don’t you talk to me?” The older woman sat down
next to Tess in the window. She wrapped an affectionate arm around
her shoulder. “Don’t you want to see your mother?”

“I do. I do!” Tess cried. “Please forgive me. I am
behaving like an ungrateful wretch. I need to stop all this.”

“Tell me, child, are you afraid that once you go
down into the Lowlands, you shan’t be allowed to come back?”

Tess nodded once before shaking her head. “I…I don’t
know. I’m certain that Lady Evelyn will want me to stay. But I have
made up my mind. I have been independent for too many years for her
to tell me…or force me to do anything against my will. The Lindsays
need me, m’lady. And I need them.”

“But you are so upset.” Fiona pushed the loose
tendrils of hair back off Tess’s face. A thoughtful expression
settled on the older woman’s beautiful face. “Have you had a chance
to talk to Colin since speaking to my husband and me today?”

Tess shook her head. After their moments together at
Ravenie Castle, she had found herself daring to hope that perhaps
he shared some of her feelings. That perhaps they might somehow
have a future together. Still, though she knew in her heart the
main reason for her misery was leaving Colin, she also hoped
desperately that the truth of her feelings would not come out
now.

Riding back from Ravenie, he had been constantly
attentive of their surroundings. She knew it was her safety that he
was concerned about, but as a result they had not had much chance
to talk. And since hearing the news about her mother’s message,
she’d not seen him at all…with the exception of passing by him as
she’d left Lord Alec and Lady Fiona. A horrible thought pierced her
heart like an icy spike. Perhaps he wanted her to go. Perhaps, as
far as he was concerned, Tess should pursue her own life and leave
him to pursue his dreams.

“I heard that he had some errands that he was seeing
to this afternoon,” Colin’s mother offered.

Tess was grateful for Fiona’s explanation. “I have
already taken so much of his time. ‘Twas very kind of him…and
James, too…to come with me to Ravenie Castle. I don’t know what I
would have done without their help.”

“James told me how magnificent you were in facing
your clan. He said you were quite impressive in both your courage
and your eloquence in asking for their acceptance.”

Tess shook her head shyly. She was hardly prepared
to accept any praise in light of how weak she’d proven to be since
returning.

“James is far, far too generous. But with the help
of your sons, things have already changed on my father’s land. And
I realize now that the reason for this silly display of hysterics
this afternoon—” She tried to smile. “—the reason is that you are
the first true family that I have come upon for a long time.” She
shook her head. “The first true family that I have
ever
come across.”

“I love you, child.” Fiona Macpherson gave her an
affectionate squeeze. She placed a kiss on her forehead, and Tess
found herself trying desperately to contain her own surging
emotions. “Tess, you are the daughter I have been waiting for. Now,
come. Come and let’s not allow this fine night to go to waste.
There are people waiting for us downstairs. We have some
celebrating to do.”

Tess allowed herself to be pulled to her feet. She
clamped down her emotions and, with Fiona’s help, prepared for the
feast being held in her honor. Tonight, she would smile and show
her appreciation for this family that had taken her in.

Tomorrow, after she started her journey south, she
knew she would have plenty of time to grieve.

Dinner at Benmore Castle was a grand
affair.

The castle servants bustled about, people
talked and laughed at the tables, children danced to the music and
ran about after the dogs. Alexander and James were in constant
conversation with the clan folk. The laird and his wife were
perfect hosts. But since the start of dinner, Tess had been
unmindful of everything and everyone but the handsome and
exceptionally quiet young man seated beside her.

This was their last night together—the last
moments. But neither of them had said much. Tess was terrified even
to glance in his direction. She hadn’t left, but already she was
missing him. Her tears were plenty and she was holding them back
only with great difficulty.

A serving man removed a platter of food that she’d
left untouched before her and replaced it with an assortment of
fruit.

“Not hungry tonight?” Colin asked.

Tess tried to regain her poise and find the voice to
answer him, but all she was able to do was shake her head.

“Not thirsty either?” He leaned near her to
check her cup. The brush of his hair against her cheek made Tess
shiver. “What are you drinking, anyway?”

Tess wrapped her hand around the cup.
“Water.”

“Not much nourishment, considering the long
days of travel ahead.”

He didn’t have to remind her. Her chin
started trembling, and she thought her composure was about to
crumble. Tess started to raise her cup to hide her sadness behind
it. Colin’s large hand closed over hers, his fingers holding hers
captive, while his other hand filled her cup from a pitcher. “Are
you cold?”

“Not cold. Sad.” Heat rose into her face at the
blurting out the truth of her feelings. In spite of it, Tess dared
herself to look at him. His eyes were smoldering embers. “I’m
leaving in the morning, and that leaves so little time to say
goodbye to those I have come to care for.”

“This does not have to be a final farewell.” Colin
reached up and casually pushed a loose strand of hair from her
cheek. His fingers scorched her skin where they brushed so lightly
against her face.

“I…I have little hope of ever coming back.”
Embarrassed at her own boldness, at sounding as if she was coaxing
an invitation, Tess quickly tore her gaze from his face and stared
down at weave of the cloth on the table. She loved him so much that
it hurt. But her pride would not let her fall apart. She would not
beg for his affection. “They say one path always leads on to other
paths.”