The Actor (13 page)

Confusing.

He opened a door
with a keycard, and she blinked at the bright lights. The corridor held a
number of unmarked anonymous doors.

“It would be so
easy to get lost here.”

“In my drinking
days I’d go through the wrong doors all the time. Sometimes on purpose.”

I bet.
Especially if you thought there’d be a hot co-star on the other side.

There was no
malice in her thought, simply stating a fact.

He stopped by
the fifth door to the right. The other side held a young woman with hot pink
hair, a well-lit mirror, and heaps of make-up, hair extensions, and random
things like plastic wrap.

The woman
smiled.

“Good morning.”

“Hi Bella, sorry
I’m late. This is my fiancée, Laura, but that’s still a secret.”

Interesting.
He never called me that before.

Bella laughed.

“That’s right,
you’re still married, aren’t you? Laura, it’s a pleasure to meet you. You have
a keeper. Marc paid for my make-up school and got me this job. I’m the youngest
artist ever to work here.”

She lowered her
voice and whispered, “I’m just sixteen. I lied on my application to the
school.”

The pink hair
threw me, but she has his eyes.

Laura tilted her
head to the side and watched Marc with a smile tugging at her lips.

“I know. He’s
full of surprises.”

“Yes, I am. I
worked with Bella’s mom on a set a long time ago. Hold my mug for a second will
ya.”

He wiggled out
of his coat and sat down. She offered the mug back and he kissed her hand.

“Thank you. Have
a seat, we’ll be here for a while.”

I want a seat
on your lap, but I guess that’s out of the question.

Bella said,
“Aww, you two are so cute together. Laura, I can’t begin to tell you how happy
I am to see him happy. Marc has been like… an uncle to me all my life. So, we
spend about two hours in here every morning. Today they’ll shoot his scenes
pretty late. Some days we have to be here at five or six.”

The mere thought
of being anywhere that early made Laura groan.

No wonder
people have drug problems. How do you wind down late at night, and how do you
get back up the next morning? I couldn’t do it.

It
was
fascinating to see Marc change in front of her eyes.

She’s good.
Should I tell her? Probably.

“Bella, you’re
amazing.”

When they left
make-up, heading for the set, he looked every bit like a fantasy pirate. He
stopped a few steps down the corridor.

“Are you mad?”

“No… She’s
wonderful. I bet it must have been hard, all these years.”

“Hell yeah, but
both she and her dad think he’s her dad. It’s better that way.”

For everyone
but you.

“Do you have any
more children tucked away?”

“Not that I know
of.”

She snuggled
into his arm, careful not to ruin the make-up.

“Uncle Marc. I
love you.”

The day had more
surprises in store. They reached what Marc called a sound stage, and a very
energetic looking man approached them. He was shorter than Laura, dressed in
jeans, T-shirt, and sneakers. Marc kept an arm around her shoulders.

“This is my
director. He couldn’t make the Christmas party, so I don’t think you’ve met?”

“We have not.
It’s a pleasure.”

The man grinned.

“It is. If
you’re here maybe we can get some decent shooting in.”

Uuh?

Marc looked
embarrassed, and the other man poked his chest.

“Every evening
at eight this guy claims he wants to go home to you. I guess it’s sweet, but we
don’t get much done.”

Marc rumbled,
“She doesn’t need to know that,” but his attempt to tower over them and look
menacing failed. “Why don’t you take this chair and sit right here… Don’t
listen to what any of these people say about me, because they’ll make me sound
like a big wuss…”

Someone passing
by giggled. “He is.”

“…Shut up. And
if you need more coffee or something, there’s a table right over there.”

One of the
camera men shouted, “Just stay away from the donuts. Donut boy hasn’t been here
yet and they’re so hard we’re thinking of making a cannon so we can shoot
intruders with them.”

The day flew by,
and Laura watched, wide-eyed, as Marc acted, acted, and acted.

No wonder
he’s exhausted when he comes home.

Eventually, she
fell asleep on a prop sofa.

Laura worked on
the abandoned rooms, with her own two hands this time. It gave her something to
do. She was still worried about excluding the children completely from the
house. If they ever came back they should feel welcome. With Thomas’s help she
turned one large room into two smaller, but really hip ones. Marc never sat
foot in them.

He worked many
long days, and she was delighted when he announced they’d close down filming
for Christmas.

Is it that
late already? Where did this month go?

She ended up
running some last errands on the day before Christmas Eve.  It had been raining
ever since the snow that originally greeted her disappeared, but now big flakes
soared through the air.

Crap. Snow
gets slippery. Marc always tells me snow gets slippery. I can’t crash his Jeep.

He probably
wouldn’t care about the car, but she’d feel horrible if she ruined something so
expensive. She drove carefully, and fought an urge to squeeze her eyes shut
every time her vehicle skidded ever so little.

When she
returned to the house, she relaxed in the seat and patted the dashboard.

“I made it. We
made it.”

The outside lights
twinkled, but the inside was dark.

Weird. Marc’s
car is outside. I guess he could have taken one of the others.

Logical
reasoning didn’t shake the feeling that some small disaster waited. She dropped
all the bags in the hallway, and heard his voice from the dark living room.

“I’m in here,
babe.”

Sitting all
alone in the dark. That’s normal…

She fumbled her
way through the hallway and stopped in the living room door. She could make out
dark shapes of the furniture, but that was all.

“Can I turn on a
light?”

“Sure.”

He sat in his
favorite chair, rubbing watery eyes with a thumb and forefinger. She crouched
on the floor and rested her hands on his knee.

“Are you okay?”

“Sure. I’m
sorry.”

For what? For
being drunk or for being human?

“How much did you
have to drink, sweetie?”

“Not enough.”

He emptied the
glass and refilled it. The gesture broke her heart.

Aww
sweetheart.

She claimed a
spot on his lap and took the glass away.

“Be a good
sport, give your girlfriend a sip.”

The strong
liquor made her cough.

That’s
hideous. How do you drink this?

Marc leaned his
head against her.
“I’m glad you’re home.”

“I’m glad I’m
home too. I missed you. Wanna tell me what happened?”

“It’s stupid.
I’m stupid.”

What did you
do? How bad can it be?

She was careful
not to show the thought, and kept a merry tone of voice.

“You’re one of
the smartest people I know.”

“Today is
Alannah’s birthday. She came early and she was so small, a little angel. I’ve
been a horrible dad to her.”

He took the
glass back and sipped it.

“You know, you
want to do everything right, and it turns out a big fucking mess. I tried to
call her today to say happy birthday, but Anne won’t even let me talk to her.”

That’s cruel.
How long has it been since he saw them? When did he come down to Florida? Must
be at least half a year.

What could she
do? Probably nothing, but she had to at least try.

“Let me try to
talk to her. Maybe she’ll at least let you drop off their presents so you can
say hi.”

This is
probably not a good idea, but it can hardly get any worse.

“You’d do that
for me?”

“Sure. I can’t
guarantee success, but I’ll try. What’s her number?”

He pulled a hand
over his face.

“I don’t know.
Look in my phone.”

“Okay. I’ll be
right back.”

This is
insane, and I love you too much to try and fail in front of you.

She pressed her
lips against his, snatched his phone, and headed for the kitchen. She should
probably use her own phone; if Anne recognized the number she might not answer.

Laura forced
herself to exhale and wiped her palms on her jeans.

No pressure.
It’s not like the Christmas joy of someone you love is at stake here or
anything…

The phone rang
and rang, and then Anne picked up.

“Hey, this is
Laura calling. We met once, in your old house…”

Awkward much?

“I know who you
are. What do you want?”

The words
blurted out without much connection to the brain.

“Marc is sitting
alone in the dark crying because he can’t see his children. It’s Christmas.
Maybe you could give him five minutes? Meet him on neutral ground somewhere if
you don’t want him in your home.”

Anne made a
snorting noise.

“That’s about
the funniest thing I ever heard. He’s drunk.”

“Yes, but he
wasn’t when he tried to call her.”

Her voice came
out too sharp. This wasn’t going well.

Anne said
nothing.

“He still drinks
sometimes, we’re working on it. He’s not doing drugs anymore, and he’s working
on a new show. He has struggled really hard to straighten himself up.”

“The kids don’t
need his shit. They’re doing good now.”

“I understand,
but he is their dad, isn’t he?”

The silence was
chilling.

I guess I hit
a sore spot.

“Fine. Tomorrow
at ten, Pacific Centre Mall, Starbucks. Don’t be late.”

She hung up, and
Laura smiled.

In the living
room, Marc still stared straight ahead. She took the glass away from him and
put it on the side table.

“You need your
hands to hold me, silly man.”

“She said no,
didn’t she?”

“Actually, we’re
meeting them in the mall tomorrow, at ten. You have to be sober and you can’t
be hung over, or this is never happening again.”

He sighed
softly.

“How did you do
that? You’re an angel.”

“C’mon, you need
to eat something.”

He followed
obediently and she could see him struggle to pull himself together.

Late at night,
she woke and found him staring up at the ceiling.

The next
morning, they were early to the mall, and Marc fidgeted with everything.

“What if they
don’t like my presents?”

I want to
tell him not to be nervous, but hell, I’d be a wreck.

“I’m sure it’ll
be fine. How are you?”

He shrugged.

“I have a
freight train in my head, but it could be worse. Maybe they won’t come. Maybe
she lied, or they don’t want to see me.”

“Sweetheart…”

She didn’t get
any further: a little boy shrieked “Daddy” and ran through the crowd.

Marc fell down
on his knees, and the child almost disappeared in his embrace.

“Aidan… I’ve
missed you so much.”

“Mom said you’ve
been sick. Are you better now?”

“I’m much
better.”

He sounded
choked.

Right now, I
wish I were somewhere else. He didn’t want to go alone, I understand that, but
this is their moment.

Glancing around,
she saw Anne approach with a beautiful girl.

Teenager…
Might be tougher.

The girl roamed
closer.

“Hey dad. Who’s
this?”

Marc looked up.

“Alannah… Come
here.”

She let herself
be hugged, but looked about as willing as a wooden board. Marc glanced back and
smiled.

“That’s Laura.”

Aidan’s eyes
darted over.

“Are you
marrying my dad? Will that make you my new mom?”

Anne frowned and
chewed her lip.

Oh crap. I
need to handle this really well.

“You already
have a mom, and I don’t think you need two. I can be your aunt if you want to.”

Alannah rolled
her eyes.

“Don’t be an
idiot and get attached to her. He’ll just cheat on her and she’ll be gone.”

Aidan looked
confused.

Poor kids.
This is going SO well…

“Aidan, is it?
Don’t you worry about all that. Your dad brought you presents.”

The boy
squealed, and Laura took the opportunity to stand up.

“I’m getting
some more coffee. Anyone want anything?”

Anne shook her
head.

“We’re not
staying.”

She still
accompanied Laura to the counter, and murmured, “I… I have to apologize for
some things I said the first time we met.”

Laura shrugged.

“I don’t blame
you. I would probably have said and thought something much worse.”

“He’s looking
good. I guess you’re good for him.”

This is a
much more civil response than I could have managed.

“Thank you. I
try to be.”

*****

For the rest of
the holiday, Marc did his best to be cheerful.

It was their
first Christmas together, and Laura deserved it to be magical. He snuck away to
dress like Santa, and she giggled when he showed up with champagne and a
present.

“I hear you’ve
been a very good girl this year.”

“Why thank you,
Santa.”

“Come sit on my
lap and tell me what you want for Christmas.”

She giggled, but
obeyed. It ended with kissing and making love by the Christmas tree.

The next
morning, Marc woke her early with breakfast in bed. She yawned and mumbled,
“What time is it?”

He made sure to
look enthusiastic. Even if he didn’t feel it, he should be cheery.

“It’s Christmas.
It’s present time.”

Laura let
herself be dazzled, and to his surprise, his faked good mood turned into a real
one. The day seemed as enchanted as the decorations and lights on the tree. It
would have been better with the kids around, but the holiday was still magical.

Boxing Day
brought a less pleasant surprise. They chased each other around the house in a
wild pillow war when someone banged on the door. Laura dropped the pillow and
bounced onto the sofa.

“Whoa, I think
someone’s trying to go right through it.”

“They don’t
sound like they’ll go away. I’ll check it out.”

He looked out
and wished that he hadn’t.

Damn.
Probably should have pretended we’re not home.

Joel’s skin had
the color and texture of old paper, accentuated by dark rings under his eyes.
His forehead shone from beads of sweat, and the entire man trembled.

“Dude, I need a
favor. Can I come in?”

Marc shrugged
and stepped to the side.

“Go to my
office.”

Laura still sat
on the sofa, and her eyes turned wide and round when Joel walked past her.

Oh yeah, she
remembers him.

“Would you get
us some coffee, babe?”

She bit her lip
and looked uncertain. He brushed his lips over her cheek and whispered, “I
know, he looks like something from night of the living dead. Don’t worry, I’ll
deal with it.”

“You’ll be
okay, right?”

The smile
didn’t come easy, but he
was
an actor.

“Of course.”

Joel slumped in
a chair and Marc leaned against the edge of his desk.

What
happened to you? Did I use to look that bad?

Joel had sure
gotten him into a lot of trouble, enough to nearly cost his life.

“You don’t look
so good.”

“I need a hit
so bad. Can I have a drink, man?”

Shaking his
head slowly, Marc lied.

“I don’t have
anything.” He added the truth. “I’m clean now.”

His past as
full time junkie ended only months earlier, but he’d rather push
that
knowledge to the side.

“I need some
money, dude.”

Marc ran a hand
over his forehead and went around the large desk. The comfortable chair greeted
him like an old friend.

“I’ll pay your
bills if you bring them here. I’ll pay rehab for you if you need to go, but I
can’t give you any cash.”

The word
rehab
wanted to stick on his tongue, but he got it out there.

I guess I
can see the other side of the coin now. Who would have thought…

Joel groaned,
and Marc was more relieved than he’d like to admit when the door opened and
Laura came in. She balanced a tray with coffee mugs and cinnamon rolls. She was
getting better at using the coffee machine.

“Thank you,
sweetheart.”

She met his
eyes with a gaze burning with questions and he shook his head ever so slightly.
When she was about to leave, he reached for her hand and gave it a soft kiss.

I wish I
could ask you to stay.

Joel sat in
silence as long as she was in the room and didn’t even eye her when she left.
Marc pushed the plate closer to him.

“Have something
to eat. Do you want some real food?”

“You know what
I need, and it’s not food.”

He sounded
almost comically pleading

“Come on, man,
I know you have some, somewhere. Or, borrow me a hundred. I’ll get more cash
soon.”

Marc held his
eyes fixed on the coffee.

Yes, I do
have some.

The stash had
waited untouched in a drawer since Laura arrived. It wasn’t on his mind
constantly, but a lot of the time.

Using it would
make it go away.

A part of him
claimed it was the greatest idea he ever had. The coffee and cinnamon rolls
anchored him and kept him from ripping the drawer open. Strange how small
things and smells could mean so much.

Giving it to
Joel might be an even better way to get it out of the house.

Moving his head
ever so little allowed his eyes to fall on a photo of Laura instead. She
laughed with her head tilted back. Beautiful.

“Maybe you
should go. Come back if you want something I
can
help you with.”