Authors: Amy Gutman
tion, regardless of what they’d done. But this argument hadn’t 24
swayed him. He’d thundered back at her, “I’m not saying he 25
shouldn’t have appellate counsel. But it doesn’t have to be you!”
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For the first time in her life, she’d openly opposed him. For a year, 27
they hadn’t spoken. He’d never forgiven her. Was he more upset 28
that she’d represented Gage or that she’d disobeyed him? All 29
these years later, she still wasn’t sure.
30
Glancing down at the phone, she saw the flashing message 31
light. She listened to the recording and found a message from 32
Paul. Listening to her fiancé’s voice, she felt not the slightest 33
emotion. He mentioned plans for next weekend, a play they had 34
tickets for. They’d barely spoken since Sunday night, that disas-35 S
trous dinner at Clarence. There was something in his tone that 36 R
told her he expected an apology.
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Quickly she erased the message. She didn’t call him back. In-1
stead, she found her thoughts returning to her talk with Jamison.
2
She tried to think about the implications, for herself as well as for 3
Callie. But while her rational mind told her that she could be in 4
danger, somehow she couldn’t feel it. The burst of adrenaline, the 5
beating heart — all of that was missing. It was like she was two 6
different people, one of them observing.
7
She reminded herself that as of yet Jamison’s theory was spec-8
ulation. He didn’t know for sure that Diane had received a note.
9
But the watch — the watch had belonged to Diane. Callie had 10
gotten a note. The three of them had all known Gage. There had 11
to be a connection. The safest thing would be to go to the police, 12
to follow the advice she’d given Callie. But at this point, she sim-13
ply couldn’t predict what consequences would follow. On the eve 14
of partnership elections, she’d be embroiled in a murder case. She 15
thought of the risk of scandal, always the kiss of death. It wasn’t 16
fair, of course. None of this was her fault. But by now she’d 17
learned her lesson: Fairness didn’t matter.
18
It would be one thing if the information she had was of great 19
significance. But, assuming that Callie stepped forward, how 20
much would it really add? Callie’s story would establish the link 21
between Diane’s murder and Steven Gage. That would be suffi-22
cient to alter the frame of reference. Besides, while she could al-23
ways step forward, she couldn’t take anything back. It made sense 24
to think this through carefully before saying anything.
25
As for personal safety, she just wasn’t worried. Maybe she was 26
in denial, but it didn’t feel that way. The thing was, her life was 27
so circumscribed, it was hard to imagine how she’d be at risk. She 28
lived in a high-security building, protected by a team of doormen.
29
Before admitting any visitor, the doorman on duty called up. At 30
work, the Harwich & Young reception desk was manned by secu-31
rity guards. Visitors had to wait downstairs for a firm-employee 32
escort. You couldn’t enter the building without showing your pass 33
card.
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A buzzing on the intercom phone by her door. She hoisted herS 35
self off the couch.
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“You’ve got a delivery,” the doorman said.
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“Thanks. Send him up.”
3
As she hung up the phone, her stomach growled in pleasant 4
anticipation. She stood by the door with her wallet until she 5
heard a knock.
6
She unlocked the door, opened it, then stood there in confu-7
sion. Instead of an Asian deliveryman, she was facing a bearded 8
white guy holding a long white box. His baseball cap was pulled 9
down low. She couldn’t see his face. Flowers, that’s what it looked 10
like. Maybe they were from Paul? But even as the thought oc-11
curred to her, she knew it wasn’t right. Paul wasn’t in any mood 12
to make this sort of gesture.
13
The man at the door took a step forward. “Can I get your sig-14
nature?”
15
“Uh. Sure.” But he wasn’t holding a pen or clipboard. What 16
did he want her to sign?
17
She had a fleeting sense that something was wrong, and then 18
he was up against her. His breath smelled of garlic and coffee. He 19
seemed to radiate heat.
20
Before she could step away, he gave her a powerful shove.
21
Then she was tumbling backward, falling into space. Colors ex-22
ploded behind her eyes. She tried to catch her breath. A jolt of 23
fear.
What was happening?
24
She heard the door click shut.
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Thursday, April 27
A r i c h perfume filled the house, the smell of roasting meat 1
and spices. Callie had spent most of the day preparing for the 2
dinner party. Since the roses had arrived two days ago, they’d 3
never been far from her mind, a fierce, nagging anxiety verging 4
on obsession. It seemed surreal that her life could be proceeding 5
on this dual track: cooking a casual dinner for friends, fearing for 6
her life.
7
It was almost six o’clock now. Her guests would be here soon.
8
Tired and distracted as she’d been all day, she needed to concen-9
trate. She’d already set the dining room table with the good 10
china and silver. Put out glass bowls of olives and nuts, a plate of 11
cheese and crackers. She had vodka, rum, bourbon, and wine, 12
purchased for the occasion.
13
As she pulled a tray of mushroom puffs out of the oven, Callie 14
heard the doorbell ring.
15
“Hi, honey.” It was Martha. She entered on a wave of cold 16
night air, pink-cheeked and animated. Her hair, an electric dark 17
brown cloud, danced around her face.
18
She peeled off her gray wool cape and handed it to Callie.
19
“What’s that fabulous smell?” she asked, gesturing toward the 20
kitchen.
21
“Peasant food. Nothing fancy. Roast pork, potatoes, spinach, 22
and onions. I made a pear tart for dessert.”
23
Callie hung up Martha’s cape, then led her back to the kitchen.
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“Wine?” Callie asked.
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“Sure.”
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“Red or white?”
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“Red.”
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On the counter were an open bottle and a cluster of large wine 3
glasses. Callie poured wine into one and handed it to Martha.
4
“Where’s Anna?” Martha asked, after taking a sip.
5
“She’s across the street with her friend Henry. His parents will 6
be here tonight. Mimi and Bernie Creighton. He’s a big-shot 7
lawyer in Boston, and she’s this yuppie mom. To be honest, I’m 8
not crazy about them, but Anna spends so much time over there, 9
I owe them an invitation. Oh, and Bernie’s bringing some guy he 10
works with. Another partner at his law firm. So if things don’t 11
work out with Tod, who knows? Maybe this guy will be an op-12
tion.”
13
The doorbell rang again.
14
Callie looked up from the mushroom puffs. “Would you mind 15
finishing up with these? Just arrange them on this plate.”
16
She quickly wiped her hands on a towel and went to answer 17
the door.
18
When she caught sight of Rick through the peephole, Callie 19
felt a catch in her throat. He was smiling that slightly bemused 20
smile and holding a bunch of tulips. For a moment, she wished 21
with all her heart that it was just the two of them.
22
As she opened the door, Callie saw that Rick wasn’t alone. Tod 23
was standing next to him, holding a bottle of wine.
24
“Hi, sweetheart.” Rick handed her the tulips and leaned down 25
for a kiss. She briefly lingered in his arms before turning to Tod.
26
“Welcome,” she said, extending a hand. “I’m so glad you could 27
make it.”
28
Tod looked wholesome and a little bit shy in khakis and a 29
hunter-green jacket. He handed Callie the bottle of wine, a ten-30
tative smile on his face.
31
Another ring of the bell. The Creightons with their guest.
32
A profusion of greetings and air kisses, a potent blend of smells, 33
the sharp floral of Mimi’s perfume, Bernie’s aftershave. Bernie’s 34
colleague was dark and heavy with an inward, brooding look.
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“Callie, I’d like you to meet John Casey. Like I told you, he’s 36 R
one of my partners. We’re working together on a case.”
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“So nice of you to have me.”
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As he spoke, Callie was startled to hear the traces of a south-2
ern accent. For a moment, she stood there, staring at him, her 3
mouth suddenly dry. The memories were so close these days.
4
Anything could trigger them. A certain kind of light. A melody.
5
The sound of a southern voice.
6
Quickly she pulled herself together, managed to force a smile.
7
“Not at all,” she said. “The more the merrier.”
8
A round of greetings and shedding of coats as Martha emerged 9
from the kitchen. With a sudden surge of protectiveness, Callie 10
wrapped an arm around Martha’s waist.
11
“You remember Rick,” she said.
12
“Of course.” Martha smiled.
13
More introductions followed, with Tod coming last. As Callie 14
presented Martha to him, she sensed Rick’s watchful eye. It 15
wasn’t a coincidence, she thought, that Rick and Tod had come 16
together. Rick would be protective of Tod, just as she was of 17
Martha.
18
“Nice to meet you, Martha,” said Tod.
19
The two of them shook hands.
20
“I’ve got to put these in water,” said Callie, holding up the 21
tulips. “Why don’t you all go into the living room? Rick can get 22
you drinks.”
23
“Need any help?” asked Martha.
24
“Maybe if you could get the hors d’oeuvres — put them on the 25
coffee table.”
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“I’ll help,” Tod said promptly.
27
Not bad,
Callie thought.
28
In the kitchen, Tod picked up the mushroom puffs. Martha 29
took a tray with pâté. “Pretty cute,” she whispered to Callie, as 30
she slid past her toward the doorway.
31
Callie picked out a vase of deep blue glass for the tulips that 32
Rick had brought. As she fanned out the bright orange and yel-33
low flowers, her mind flashed back to the roses. How time had 34
seemed to stop as she stared at their crimson mass. As soon as the S 35
shock had dissipated, she’d thrown them into the trash. Then, R 36
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not content to have them merely out of sight, she’d taken the 2
garbage out.
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That night, she’d mentioned the roses to Rick, hoping that 4
she’d been wrong. But Rick didn’t know anything; he’d told her 5
to call the florist. “They must have made a mistake,” he said.
6
“They went to the wrong address.” In fact, she’d already made 7
that call, already knew the answer. The florist didn’t have a sin-8
gle order that day for a dozen long-stemmed roses. The box must 9
have been salvaged from some past delivery.
10
From the other room, Callie heard muffled talk, then a sudden 11
burst of laughter. Strange how totally alone she felt with friends 12
just steps away. Her eyes settled on a bottle of wine, now half 13
empty. The crimson liquid that it held was the same color as the 14
roses. The room seemed to dissolve behind it, throwing the bot-15
tle into sharp relief. She was suddenly hit with an astonishing 16
urge to raise it to her mouth.
17
She hadn’t touched a drop of alcohol since the night of the 18
sentencing, but all these years later, she remembered everything.
19
The way the world seemed to dissolve and soften, filled with se-20
cret meaning. In AA they’d told her that alcoholism was an in-21
curable disease. She’d never argued with the diagnosis, though 22
she hadn’t exactly agreed. The way she saw it, drinking resem-23
bled some wildly destructive talent. Others less gifted genetically 24