Read The Balance of Silence Online
Authors: S. Reesa Herberth,Michelle Moore
Tags: #Gay-Lesbian Romance, #Romantic SciFi-Futuristic
Devlin rolled his eyes. “Where we talked about the case. Come on. I love you like a brother, Connor, but I need a change of scenery.”
“Er…right.” Connor’s face heated up at this honest declaration. “I’m sorry I’m not—”
Devlin held his hand up. “Don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. You should take a break too. Go visit the aquarium or the zoo or something.”
“Oh, I don’t think…”
“I won’t tell if you don’t.”
“We’re being
paid
.”
“Yeah, and I’ve worked every day for the last four weeks. I’m not going off duty. Just being
on
duty somewhere different.”
“Dancing.”
“You don’t have to sound so medieval about it. My phone works just fine in a club, and I’ll even take my gun with me, Agent Hutchens.”
Connor opened his mouth to object, then realized he was simply repeating his father’s line, which he didn’t even agree with. “Then enjoy yourself. I might go to the aquarium as you suggested.”
“Now there’s a good little SCI. Trust me. You’ll be a lot fresher. Maybe even come up with a new wrinkle from that high-powered brain of yours.”
“I might at that.”
It was Thursday night. Devlin made it clear that as from five on Friday, he would do his own thing, within limits. Having agreed to it, Connor quite looked forward to a bit of sight-seeing, even if he’d have to conceal it from his father. How nice it would be not to have to, but he feared Otou-san was at a stage in his life where he would no longer change. Connor would have to bend, since Otou-san wasn’t capable of doing so.
Another habit they had fallen into was going to the gym together, or swimming, as their fancy took them. It provided much delicious torture for Connor, for Devlin had not a trace of body shyness, and changed in the lockers without resorting to towels or cubicles. Nor should he. It was only Connor who felt somehow he should hide himself—not to conceal his body, but his reaction to Devlin’s. He couldn’t bring himself to suggest they exercise separately. What possible excuse could he give?
Devlin paid the bill, and stood. “Gym or pool tonight?”
“Uh…gym?”
“I don’t mind if you want the pool.”
“No, the gym. Definitely.”
Devlin frowned. “You okay, buddy? You’re a little stressed.”
“Um. I think…yes, I need a break. You’re right.”
“I am. Don’t burn out on me, Connor. I’ve just broken you in all nice and comfortable.”
He grinned at his own joke, and Connor smiled at his expression. He couldn’t resist the man’s smiles, or much else about him. He was terribly afraid of where this predilection could lead.
They had now been working out together long enough that they moved through their routines seamlessly, Connor spotting Devlin and Devlin spotting him like sports partners who’d trained together for years. Connor had to admit it was a comforting feeling, like being back at college, with Andrew and Steven, runners like him.
As usual, when Connor finished his treadmill segment, Devlin was ready behind the bench press to help him. “You’re going to look like King Kong if you keep this up. No one’ll believe that Clark Kent cover of yours if you’re bulging out of your shirts.”
“Clark Kent?”
“Connor, do you
ever
watch anything that’s not educational?”
“I see films. Sometimes. At college, quite often.”
“And you don’t know who Superman is?”
“Of course. Oh, that Clark Kent. All your references are so last century.”
“Superman’s immortal. He’s not stuck in any century.”
“If you say so.”
Bench pressing with Devlin so close to him was an exercise in self-control as much as strength.
Connor always tried to concentrate purely on the lifts, but his attention too often wandered, as it did tonight, to Devlin’s arms and Devlin’s scent and how very lucky he was to have Devlin as a partner. At least he managed to finish the program without making Devlin worry he was slipping into a sensory zone out.
When Connor finished the routine, and his workout, Devlin straightened and wiped his face with the hem of his shirt. “Must be some nice thoughts you were having there.”
“Excuse me?”
Devlin looked downwards in a pointed manner, and Connor realized what had drawn his attention. He flushed hot and sat up, trying to discreetly adjust his suddenly far too small gym shorts. “That’s a very personal observation, Devlin.”
“Well, I figured you wouldn't mind since you keep checking me out.”
“I don’t.”
Devlin arched an eyebrow.
Panicking, Connor took refuge in hauteur. “This is an inappropriate conversation for two agents.”
“We’re off the clock. Nothing wrong with finding your partner attractive.”
“I don’t!”
Devlin raised that exceedingly irritating eyebrow again. “You don’t think I’m attractive?”
“Of course. I mean, no! I mean…do you even understand the meaning of privacy?”
“What’s the big deal? We’re both gay, Connor.”
Connor stalked over to his towel. “Actually, I’m bisexual, and I’m asking you to refrain from this topic.”
“Sorry. Forget I said anything.”
“And that will be so very easy, won’t it? Do you ever filter anything that comes out of your mouth, or does it dribble straight from your brain?”
“Wow. You can overdo the bitchy personality thing. Just saying.” Damn the man, he was grinning.
“And you can be too blunt. I don’t wish to talk about sex or attraction or anything else. This borders on sexual harassment.”
Devlin held his hands up, no longer smiling. “You’re right. And I really am sorry.”
“Apology accepted. I’m going to shower.”
He stalked off, glad Devlin had no superpower to detect rank hypocrisy when it was this thick in the air.
Back in their room, he stripped off and got into the shower. He ran the water ice-cold as a punishment, and hoped desperately Devlin would deal with his eruption of temper by ignoring it as he ignored Connor’s other foibles. But really, Connor wasn’t showing his best side here. If Devlin would just back off a little, accept his lack of openness on personal subjects as a warning to stay off them, it would be so much easier. Devlin had taken Tom Pacey’s remarks about partners and spouses a little bit too much to heart. And considering the way Connor’s thoughts had been running, the last thing he wanted was to encourage
that
. Damn it, they were on a case, and had to work together. Getting “it” out in the open was the last thing they needed.
When he came out, Devlin was waiting, but the man only slipped past him into the bathroom with a murmured “Excuse me”. Connor dressed in clean underwear and climbed into bed, pulling the covers around him in a way that he hoped indicated he did
not
want to talk about it. Especially not “it”.
For a few minutes after Devlin came to bed, there was blessed silence. But he wasn’t asleep, and sure enough, he spoke to Connor’s obdurate back. “Still mad at me, huh?”
“No. I simply don’t wish to talk about it.”
“I get that. It’s not a big deal though. You’re hot. No big secret there.”
Would he ever stop talking about it? “You think I’m hot?”
Devlin chuckled. “Sure. I’d have to be blind, deaf and paralyzed not to. You’re a bit paler than I’m used to, but I could work with it.”
“I don’t
want
you to work with it!”
“Jeez, calm the fuck down, will you? Anyway, you’re not my type.”
Why not?
Connor rolled over and glared, but didn’t ask because that would lead to things he really didn’t want to talk about. “Some matters are inappropriate for discussion.”
“Sure. I know that.”
“So we aren’t talking about it.”
“Okay.”
Connor threw the covers back and sat up. “For the record, yes, I think you’re attractive.”
“Cool.”
“So will you shut up about it?”
Devlin smiled brightly. “Absolutely. Anyway, now it’s cleared up.”
Connor flung himself down, rolled over and pulled the covers over his head. “Good
night
, Devlin.”
“Good night, Connor. Sleep well.”
Oh,
fishsticks.
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