The Bonded: The Allseer Trilogy Book I (30 page)

But there was a new wound, deeper and more painful than the rest. It tore at her heart and a cry ripped from her chest as she watched Fenir fall to the ground, his eyes wide with disbelief. His fingers fumbled at the hilt that jutted from his neck but his brother was at his side a moment later, pushing his hands away. “No, no, no, no,” she heard him mumble. “Brother. Oh, Allseer. I’m so sorry. Brother, please. Don’t do this.”

Fenir raised a shaky hand and Tomias took it frantically. Tears streamed down his cheeks as he watched his brother fade before his eyes. “No…no…no…” A cough sent a spray of bloody saliva floating into the air and Fenir was still a moment later. Kirheen winced as Tomias let loose a scream that seemed to tear at his throat, a cry of pain that Kirheen knew she’d never know the weight of. He had just lost a part of himself, his other half, his twin. She couldn’t fathom that pain. Didn’t want to.

The world was growing dark at the edges of her vision as her own blood seeped out onto the floor. Every wound howled for attention, playing tug-o-war with her mind. Her head pounded, like someone hammering nails into the inside of her skull. It only grew worse as she laid flat on the floor, her chest barely rising and falling as she struggled to stay conscious. It couldn’t end like this; it couldn’t have been all in vain. There was flutter of movement to her right, a streak of red hair. Another cry joined the chorus of sorrow and Kirheen shut her eyes, just wanting to drown out the world that had suddenly fallen apart around her.

Therin stepped into a nightmare. There was a scream as they approached the temple, something inhuman, so filled with pain and rage that he stopped walking. Trista put a hand on his back, listening intently to the sounds coming from the Temple. Therin hesitated for just an instant, hearing the wracking sobs coming from the other side of the door. He burst through a moment later, bow drawn.

He almost slid through the entrance as his boots came in contact with something dark and sticky. The smell gave it away before his sight did. There was no way to tell who or what had been injured but there were three bodies crowded around the door and all of them were covered in blood. Trista stumbled into the room behind him and her eyes grew wide. She took in the scene for barely a second before she was rushing to the side of one of the three.

“Fenir,” she screamed, her hands scrabbling over the body lying before her. There was another man by his side that looked just like the man on the floor, his white hair tinged with red blood. He was sobbing, completely inconsolable, rocking back and forth next to the corpse. “Fenir! Wake up, damn you! Wake up! Allseer, please…Tomias, tell me this isn’t real. Tell me….” She sobbed against Fenir, her hands grabbing the folds of his robe as she cried.

There was movement to his left and he looked over to see Kirheen, a deep gash visible in her arm. She was bleeding heavily but still alive. Lowering his bow, he stepped over to Trista and grabbed the back of her robes. He hoisted her to her feet and ignored her fury as she turned on him.

“I know your pain right now, but help those that can be helped. Grief can come later. Kirheen needs you.”

Her lip quivered, tears streaking down her face in tiny rivers. She took a shuddering breath and stepped past him to help Kirheen. With that done, Therin retrieved his bow and turned to face his brother.

Nyson stood at the end of the hall, his hands calmly clasped behind his back. This was not the man that he remembered. He had grown terribly thin over the years, his features almost skeletal, his eyes a flaming ember of hatred. His lips were curved into a smile, as if he took pride in the work he’d done. It filled Therin with a rage he’d never known.

“Brother,” he said through gritted teeth.

“The rebellious sibling comes crawling back to my sanctuary. You’re too late.”

His fingers curled tightly around his bow, his knuckles going white. “I came here to end this. This, Nyson, this is too much. I’ve seen what you’ve been up to all these years. You’re a heartless fool. Whatever purpose you had, whatever hope you had for saving our kind, you lost it long ago. You’re nothing but an animal now. You need to be put down.”

Therin notched an arrow and raised his bow, taking a step towards his brother. Nyson regarded him with a cool stare. “You won’t hurt me, brother. Even back then, with the hatred you felt towards me, you couldn’t bring yourself to kill me and be done with it. Instead you fled with your tail between your legs. You even had the indecency to take my bond mate with you, a cruelty that more than just I have felt.”

“And so you’ve done all this? You knew how she felt. She despised you, despised your desire for revenge. You’ve become the very thing she hated.”

“It doesn’t matter anymore, brother. I’ve become so much more than she could ever imagine. Lower the bow, I know you won’t use it.”

“You may have changed, brother, but so have I!” He let his fingers slip, felt the familiar thwack of the bow as it snapped the air. The arrow hit his brother in his right shoulder, forcing him back against the wall. His hand flew up to the shaft and he looked up with an expression of pure shock. A second later he retaliated with a blast of energy so powerful it manifested itself in his vision, hurtling towards him as a glowing blue ball. He almost dodged but the blast burnt his hand, ripping the bow away from him and sending it flying across the room where it landed near the others.

With no physical weapon, it was now mind against mind. He took a breath to steady himself and reinforced his walls. He felt his brother lash out, clawed fingers digging into his skull as he tried to wrench control over him. He pushed back with equal strength, their powers pushing against each other in a deadlock. He kept pushing with all his strength as he forced his feet to carry him forward. Step by step he made his way across the room until he was standing just a few feet in front of Nyson.

Another ball of energy was hurled at him but he easily side stepped it, feeling a calm wash over him. In their youth, his brother had always been the better of the two when it came to his control of his powers. He’d shown remarkable skill at a young age, able to bend others to his will by the time most people were learning how to block their minds. Despite his strength of mind, his physical strength had always been lacking.

Therin pressed hard, shoving all he had into taking a few more steps. A solid push and he broke free, lurching forward to grab his brother around the throat. He slammed him against the wall and Nyson winced as it collided with the arrow sticking from his shoulder.

“You took everything from these children. You stole from them the ability to choose.”

Nyson smiled. “Are you going to kill me, brother?”

“No, Nyson. I think it’s time you shared their fate.”

With his free hand, he locked his fingers against the side of Nyson’s face. There was a moment of panic from him as he realized what was happening but by then it was too late. Therin pushed against his mind, slicing through the delicate threads holding it together.

There was a shudder and his brother went limp. Therin released his grip, holding his brother steady while he swayed, unsteady as a newborn colt. When he raised his head, his eyes were dull, his jaw slack as he stared far off into space.

Unbinding, a power he had obtained naturally, but one he had kept hidden. Such a power wasn’t meant to exist. It wasn’t meant to be used. This, however, was a special case and as he turned away from his brother, he felt the ripples of the past finally still.

His rebellion had stripped them of their independence, had forced them to live a lie. Now he would show them the truth and this time, he would be setting them free.

Kirheen watched smoke curl from the funeral pyre, weaving through the blue wraith wood like tiny spirits seeking escape. The world seemed unnaturally still. No wind blew through the trees that night and the people standing near her seemed more like apparitions hovering on the edge of her peripheral, ghostly and silent.

There was a crackle as the wood caught fire and the dry tinder exploded into blue flame, licking upwards to claim the body that lay over it. She felt her stomach twist with guilt, felt the wounds he’d inflicted burn like the fire raging beneath him. Shame coated her skin like a film of sweat and it was hard not to think that those standing beside her weren’t blaming her for the pain they were now feeling.

Tomias stood close to the fire, watching the flames with dead eyes. He hadn’t spoken a word since the events in the temple. He was distant, in a world all of his own. Trapped in a prison of pain and there was no saving him from it.

Trista was nowhere to be seen. The pain was too much and grief drove her apart from them.  The healer had allowed Kirheen this moment, a moment to see off a man that had been both mentor and friend. Once it was over, she’d be drugged, forced to sleep until their business in Sanctuary was over. Her wounds needed to heal, both mental and physical. Kirheen would consider herself lucky is Trista didn’t poison her while she was at it.

She took a cautious step forward, her shoulder brushing Tomias. His eyes never left the flames and she felt a stab of overwhelming sadness when he refused her hand. There was nothing to be done for him. His grief was beyond comprehension. She could only stand by his side and hope that somewhere within he found comfort in her presence.

They watched the flames wash over Fenir, curling around his body as if to embrace him. He faded, claimed by the heat and smoke until he was no more. Kirheen choked back tears, biting her cheek to stop herself from crying.
Goodbye my friend.

Even long after the flames had died and the others had fled, she stayed with Tomias. The moon was big and bright above them, her gentle light making the surrounding trees glow even brighter. She probably would have stayed there all night had Trista not come to fetch them. Grieving as she was, she was still a healer and that part of her was strong as ever.

The vial she downed was bitter but she found little heart to complain. She settled into her bed and let herself weep quietly until she couldn’t fight off the effects of the medicine any longer. She was pulled into a dreamless slumber, free of the pain that had hung over her like a cloud ever since she’d learned the truth.  It was the last time she’d ever sleep there. The last time she’d ever see Sanctuary. A new life awaited her come morning and with it a new set of struggles.

There were so many broken. He forced himself to knit their minds back together one by one, driving himself to exhaustion day by day. Those that had recently undergone the unbinding returned to the world just as they had been, but those that had spent years under the control of Nyson remained much as they were. There was nothing to be done with the broken but to leave them behind.

In the end he opted for a merciful death and the others that had made the journey shared in the grim task. Each of them was given a proper burial and laid to rest, their symbols carved onto wraith wood planks so they’d never be forgotten. He only hoped Kirheen would approve.

The Bonded, broken from the control that had been exerted over them were shocked to learn the truth. Just as Kirheen had been when she’d learned the reality beyond the woods, they found their whole world suddenly turned upside down. Without purpose, the idea of freedom was overwhelming and scary but in the end, they agreed to make the journey to the outside world. They agreed to leave their powers behind and start a life anew.

They left Sanctuary as they had come, leaving the whispering woods behind once and for all. They carried the broken and battered with them and crossed the mountains that would lead them to their new lives.

Kirheen examined herself in the small mirror above the washbasin. A row of stitches held her cheek together, a livid red line running between them. Despite the outward look of it, it was healing nicely. The same couldn’t be said for her arm and side, both of which were healing slowly. The pain came and went, washing over her in powerful waves when it did decide to strike. Leann had taken to dosing her with pain relieving tinctures to help her cope with the pain.

If the external wounds were bad, the pain she felt in her heart could have been called catastrophic. The death of Fenir was fresh in her mind and she often suffered from terrible nightmares, reliving the events in the temple as if they were real. She’d awake screaming, often waking Tomias in the process. With little place to put them, they had both been set up in the barn, beds made out of hay in two empty stalls. It wasn’t the most comfortable bed she’d ever slept in, but it was a place to call home for the time being.

The space between them was palpable. Most days, Tomias would barely eat, his eyes far away and filled with a pain Kirheen wished she could fix. But there was no fixing his loss, a loss that she blamed herself for causing. He had slain his brother in order to save her and while she was grateful, she would have given anything to save him from the pain he now felt.

Each day she tried speaking to him and each day she was ignored until she finally gave up all together. Despite his silence, she laid his food out for him each day and covered him with a blanket at night. From time to time she brought him books and scrolls to keep him busy. Though a rare thing, she’d sometimes catch him reading, flipping through the pages with trembling hands.

Garild, while in considerably better health, was of no help. His anger over losing his hand had faded in part to the slender, raven haired healer that had tended to him. They had grown close in her absence. She was gentle and kind and nurturing, all the things that Kirheen was not. She didn’t expect such a thing to hurt as bad as it did, but she found herself weeping for the friend she had lost, for the life with him she’d never had.

She distanced herself from her old bond mate, too consumed by her own feelings of guilt and sadness to deal with the dying embers of his anger towards her. She needed his forgiveness but it was something she was willing to wait for. It would come in time and right now she needed to be alone.

She kept herself busy, helping Leann on projects around the house to the best of her abilities. Leann claimed the movement would help her wounds heal better and though it was painful, it kept her mind busy which was more important than the pain she faced.

As she grew stronger, she became restless. She took up lessons with Therin, learning about the world that she knew so little about. She learned that the great beast she shared a barn with was called a Horse, a strange kind of pack animal that made traveling easier. She studied maps, fascinated by the alien world around her. It was so large and she struggled to wrap her head around the sheer size of it all, of the amount of people said to live within each city.

She learned of the deities, of the current Royal Family and their worship of Zekar the Nightbringer. The plight of her people was a convoluted web and the details of their struggles made her head spin. It was a struggle most of her kind tried to avoid. Having powers, Therin said, wasn’t worth losing their lives.

And she learned other things; to cook and mend clothes and to tend to the horses. A gathering in the town led to a night of learning to dance and for the first time in weeks, she laughed, linked arm in arm with a boy as they twirled into the night.

And on a day just like any other, after she’d risen from her bed and brushed the hay from her hair, Tomias spoke. At first she thought she had imagined it, thinking the small croaking sound had come from Benny, the speckled horse that slept across the barn. She eyed him curiously but the horse simply stared at her, his teeth working on a clump of hay. It was only when she caught movement out of the corner of her eye that she realized it was Tomias. He had moved from his usual spot, had stood with the painful rise of a man much older than he was. He used the post of the stall to raise himself up, his face contorted with pain.

Kirheen was at his side in a flash, helping him stand. They took a few careful steps and then he sunk to his knees. She lowered him down carefully, sitting on the dusty ground with him, his arm draped around her shoulder. “Are you alright,” she asked cautiously, dawdling over him as if he were a child.

He raised his dark eyes and his gaze locked on to hers. He reached out with an unsteady hand and touched the jagged red line on her cheek. “Thank you,” he whispered. There were tears welling in his eyes and she looked away, feeling ashamed that the mere sight of her could cause him such pain. “Thank you,” he said again. “Thank you for not leaving me. For not giving up.”

She forced herself to meet his eyes and found herself lost in the beauty of them, of the strangeness of seeing life in eyes that she thought were forever dead. To see a hint of that spark took her breath away. “I wouldn’t leave you, Tomias. I’ll be right here.”

“Can you help me back? I…don’t think I’m ready for this. I thought maybe…but…I can’t.”

“I understand.” She helped him to his feet and lowered him back onto his makeshift bed. He leaned his head back against the stall, letting his eyes drift shut. She rose quietly, intending to let him drift back to sleep.

“Kirheen,” he called and she stopped, turning her head to look over her shoulder. He was staring at her intently, his cinnamon colored eyes swimming with an emotion she couldn’t define. He took a shaky breath and spoke. “It was always my brother. Ever since we were young…it was always him. Every bad thing that ever happened to us, he took the brunt of. Every scrape and bruise and broken bone was his to bear. And now… he’s gone, taken by my own hands.”

Kirheen felt her voice crack as she spoke. “Tomias, I’m so—“

He raised a hand to stop her. “Let me finish, please. I am broken, Kirheen. I can’t explain to you the pain I feel at having lost him. He was a part of me just as I was a part of him. I feel like a part of me has died. Maybe a part of me has.” He looked down at his palms, examining his hands as if they were foreign things. He opened and closed them a few times, squeezing feeling back into his long fingers. When he looked back up to her, his brow was furrowed. She shuddered, knowing full well what would come next. The blame for his death, pinned on her as it should be.

“Despite this pain…despite everything that has happened, Kir, I don’t regret saving you.”

She felt something heavy shift in her heart, a floodgate rising and a tide of emotion finally freeing itself from some place deep within her. She swallowed the lump in her throat and turned towards him, her lip quivering. She wanted so badly to say something, to ask him to say it again so she’d know for certain it was real.

Instead he opened his arms, beckoning her to come closer. She ran forward, diving into him harder than she’d planned. He huffed, trying to reclaim the air she’d driven out of him with her elbow. Her wounds protested the movement, burning from the sudden impact. At the moment she cared little for his arms were wrapping around her, pulling her close. He settled his chin on top of her head and sighed.

After a time he leaned away from her, raising a hand to settle on her cheek. His thumb gently caressed the puckered skin of her scar and she leaned into his touch. Those same fingers traveled to her arm, running along the bandages that protected her healing wound.

“Does it hurt,” he asked, his face displeased.

“It will heal in time,” she said softly.
We both will
.

He nodded and pulled her against him, careful of the wound on her side. They remained that way, basking in a strange mix of hope and sadness that surrounded their world like a bubble.  “What happens now,” he asked. “I know you too well. You won’t stay here forever.”

Kirheen mused, mulling over the question. She’d thought long about her options, about what she planned to do. As much as she hated to admit it, he was right. She couldn’t stay there forever. She couldn’t just stay as she was, to grow old without a purpose. “I think I’ll visit the city. I want to see it with my own eyes. I keep hearing so much, I want to see it all, not just hear about it.”

“Hmm, a change of scenery then?” He burrowed his cheek against her forehead. “I think I may have to go with you, you know, make sure you stay out of trouble and all.” 

“Oh please, like I ever get into trouble.” Benny neighed loudly, shaking his head. Kirheen looked over at him, her lips curling into a smile. “Yeah, a change of scenery would definitely be nice. This barn isn’t doing much for our good looks, is it?”

“I’d say not,” he grinned, the first genuine smile Kirheen had seen on his face in weeks. It filled her with joy. She drifted to sleep in his arms, feeling the rise and fall of his chest, the steady drumming of his heart. She dreamt of places she had yet to see, of oceans and fields of grain, of crowded streets filled with bright tents, the streets alive with sound and the smell of spices. She dreamt of spiraling towers stretching into the sky like skeletal fingers and felt hope bloom in her heart once more.