Authors: Nicola May
– Chapter Twenty-Nine –
‘Fuck, shit, bollocks. Sexual problems? You can’t ask that.’ Jimmy twitched. His Tourettes always got worse when he was perturbed. He looked at Simon Dye with disdain.
‘It’s a free country, Jimmy, so I
can
ask that, but on this occasion I am actually joking.’
The entire Bow Wow Club secretly breathed a collective sigh of relief.
‘Tosser, balls, wank,’ Jimmy added. The newbies smirked, they had never met anyone with Tourette’s before. The regulars carried on as normal.
‘Thank goodness for that, Simon, you smut monster,’ Cali said in her posh voice. ‘Mind you, a turkey farm on Boxing Day would have seen more action than my bedroom over Christmas.’
‘Why do you think that is?’ Simon enquired kindly.
‘Eric’s having a bit of a wobble, I think. I mean, it has only been seven months and he was with
her
for twenty-five years. And it was our first Christmas together.’
‘And you’ve been referring to his dead wife as
her
since you’ve been coming here, Cali. Maybe it’s time you started to let him in too?’
‘Well, I can’t cook roast potatoes like her, my washing powder doesn’t make the clothes soft enough and he is still wearing his bloody wedding ring! I even had all his bloody kids and their broods round for Christmas dinner.’
Ruby began to spin her ring around her wedding finger. Since getting back into the swing of working again and feeling happier, she had begun to eat as normal, and had put on a much-needed few pounds in the past weeks. She was delighted when the ring that Michael had given to her fitted.
At first she felt weird putting it on as it wasn’t the actual one George had gently placed on her finger on their perfect wedding day, but once it was there she felt whole again. And, although she had said before it was a good thing to not wear it, when it slipped on, it had felt as if a little piece of her darling husband was still with her.
Cali’s words made her think. She hadn’t even considered that her wearing her ring would bother Michael. I mean, if it did, surely he wouldn’t have gone to all the trouble to replace it for her. But that was Michael all over. So lovely. So thoughtful. She really must make more time for him, but work was mental at the moment. She thought back to their lovemaking in the Soho Hotel and suddenly got the urge to do it again.
‘I’d shag you, Cali,’ Jimmy suddenly announced in all seriousness, without an utterance of swear word.
Simon took a huge slurp from his vodka mug, then clapped his hands together. ‘More tea, Vicar, then let’s get serious, shall we? The real subject of tonight is Can Men Only Actively Love One Woman at a Time – discuss!’
– Chapter Thirty –
‘Blindfold me?’ Ruby enquired slightly nervously as Michael pulled his old grey Peugeot convertible into a layby in a quiet Devon country lane.
‘Don’t worry, I’m not going to rape and pillage you - unless you want me to that is?’
Ruby laughed.
‘Right, let’s get this roof down first shall we?’
‘Michael, it’s freezing.’
‘Wrap your scarf around you and put this on.’ He threw a blue beanie hat at her.
‘I don’t get it.’
‘Ooh, you will.’
‘Michael! Stop it!’
‘It’s your mind being filthy now, not me. But you will get that too with bells on it later, I promise.’
***
Michael gently helped Ruby out of the car and removed the blindfold, kissing her on the tip of her nose as he did so. ‘You can look now.’
Ruby blinked a few times to refocus her eyes and then bit her lip.
‘Oh Michael. This is just so, so beautiful!’ She jumped up and down on the spot like a little girl.
They were at the top of a big hill with a view overlooking the Dart estuary, so wonderful it literally took your breath away. It had been one of those lovely late-winter days, crisp but bright, and the setting sun just made the moment perfect.
‘Happy Valentine’s, Ruby.’
‘It’s not until tomorrow, but Happy Valentine’s too, you luscious hunk of man.’ She looked up at him and smiled. ‘You’re actually quite special, aren’t you, Mr Bell?’
‘I have my moments.’ He span her around, looked right into her moist green eyes and kissed her gently.
‘Now, what was that you promised me with bells on it?’ she whispered.
Michael felt a stirring. ‘We’ve got to find the cottage first.’
‘Cottage! Wow! I thought we were going to a B&B.’
‘Only the best for my little ginger Sarah Burton.’
‘What did you call me?’ Ruby had to shut her eyes and inhale deeply.
‘Sarah Burton - you know, the royal designer.’
‘I know who she bloody is!’ Ruby snapped. She had relived over and over her final moments with George, and this flashback washed over her like a massive tsunami wave.
‘Why - do you not think she’s good enough to be compared too? ’ Michael was perplexed by her response.
‘Look, it’s nothing.’
‘Well, it is obviously something or you wouldn’t have asked me not to say it again.’
‘George… he… on the last day I saw him…’ She paused again, then blurted out, ‘Called me by the same name.’
‘Oh Rubes, I’m sorry. It’s so hard not to upset you and I try my best. A - I don’t know how to say this without it coming out wrong. But maybe I’m not good enough to be compared to either.’
‘Michael. Don’t say that. It’s not about comparing. It’s about coping and learning to love someone again. And when you have never stopped loving the person you were in love with before, it’s bloody difficult.’ She bit her lip and looked to the sky. ‘I don’t expect you to understand and I’m so sorry. Michael. You’ve been brilliant with everything and I am so happy that we are here together today.’
‘Really?’
‘Really.’ She grabbed his hand and squeezed it tight. ‘Now come on, let’s get to this cottage before it becomes completely dark. I’ve just noticed there are no streetlights here. Where are we anyway?’
‘Questions, questions. It’s a little village called Dittisham, in the South Hams of Devon. I can’t wait to show you round tomorrow. Dartmouth is just up the road, well - up the river actually. In fact, the adventure starts here!’
***
‘That is hilarious,’ Ruby commented as they pushed open the low door into the quirkiest pub she had ever been inside in her life. A soft toy otter whizzed up to the top of the bar on a weighted string and triggered a bell to ring as they approached the bar.
Her mobile suddenly rang and everyone stared at her. The young, strawberry-blond bespectacled barman pointed to the sign above the air ambulance charity box on the bar. IF YOU RING, THE CHARITY BOX SINGS!
Ruby dutifully put in a coin and turned off her phone. Pulling his out of his pocket, Michael noticed he didn’t have a signal anyway. ‘What a good idea. Phones off for the rest of the weekend. I don’t want to talk to anyone but you, anyway.’
After both being convinced the local Addlestone cider was a must, they managed to find a little table near the big window at the front of the pub. The black of the river was paved in light from the full moon and the blinking lights of the boats moored in the Dart estuary.
After a pint of her cloudy drink, Ruby started to feel a bit tipsy. She was sure the ruddy-faced boating locals were watching her reaction to their local bionic brew.
‘Why have the bar staff got FBI on their sweatshirts?’ she asked. ‘Weird.’
Michael laughed. ‘Not weird at all - the pub’s called the Ferry Boat Inn.’
‘Ha! How ditsy am I? I love it here. It’s so cosy with the fire in the corner too.’
‘It’s my favourite place in the world. I had a pact with a good friend once that if ever either of us got into trouble, we would just say FBI because it is so out of the way no one would ever find us here.’ The friend was Justin and it suddenly made him feel sad. They had shared such good times.
‘That’s cool.’ Ruby broke his train of thought. ‘Well, maybe we should have the same pact too, Michael Bell. Not that either of us will ever get into any trouble. Good girl me.’
‘Hmm. When you want to be. But, yes - deal.’ He high-fived her. ‘Another pint?’
‘I can’t believe I’m drinking pints and no! If I don’t eat first, I’ll fall into the river walking back along that little path.’
‘Do you like the cottage though?’
‘You know I do - it’s perfect.’
Ruby squirmed slightly, thinking back to the amazing sex they had had earlier. They hadn’t even waited to unpack or look around. Just ran up to the bedroom of the estuary-fronted cottage and ripped each other’s clothes off. The tension of earlier heightening their lovemaking.
‘I’m hungry too after all that exercise.’ He kissed Ruby on the lips. ‘Check out the blackboard behind you: the grub here is all homemade and very tasty usually.’
‘So does a ferry run from right outside here then?’
‘Yes. You can get one across to Agatha Christie’s house or to Dartmouth.’ ‘Agatha Christie, we have to go!’
Michael was pleased at her excitement.‘It is a beautiful house – Greenway, it’s called. It was her holiday home, I believe, but is a National Trust property now. She actually based one of her novels there. Slugger, mate.’ Michael addressed the young barman whom he had recognised from the last time he was here. ‘Is the Dartmouth ferry going this time of year?’
‘You best ask old Ron over there. I think it depends what time he leaves here.’
Michael laughed. ‘OK, thanks.’
Ruby grinned with pleasure.‘Valentine’s Day with Agatha Christie and you. Maybe you can see if Daphne du Maurier’s free too and then I may just have to marry you!’ She was slurring by now.
Michael knew he couldn’t rise to this, but just to hear those words come out of his beautiful lover’s mouth, even in jest, made him feel warm inside.
So warm inside, that tomorrow he would tell her.
– Chapter Thirty-One –
‘AITCHOO!’ Everything about Simon Dye was loud, even his sneeze.
‘Bless you,’ Ruby offered as she came through the church-hall door. ‘So now you can’t blame poor little Fanny for your allergy, can you? She’s not even here.’
‘Susie?’
‘Ruby.’
‘Ruby, her dirty little hairs are obviously now embedded into the wooden floor.’
‘Maybe you’re allergic to me?’
‘More likely the moaners who come here every Tuesday.’
‘Harsh. But true.’ Laughing, she walked through to the small kitchen at the back of the hall.
‘Diet Coke?’
‘Yep, lovely.’
Ruby didn’t dare say she knew that in his mug at the front he had already poured his vodka. Mind you, maybe it wasn’t such a bad idea. She was finding helping out here a lot harder than she’d anticipated. It had made her assess her own loss in ways she wouldn’t have thought possible.
‘So are you seeing anyone again, after your husband passing?’
‘Sort of.’
‘Ah, shagging someone then?’
‘Simon!’ Ruby turned her head to the side. ‘I think it’s more than that.’
‘Think?’ Ever the counsellor, he wouldn’t drop it.
‘Simon, stop it. It’s like I can’t give my all to someone because I still love George. We have just been away for Valentine’s, actually.’
‘So, it is more than that.’
‘He told me that he loved me.’ Ruby welled up.
Simon ran to her side. Here.’ Pulling two chairs up facing each other, he handed her a tissue and gently held her small pale hands in his great big black ones.
‘Is he a good, kind man?’ His Scottish accent seemed to get stronger with emotion.
Ruby nodded.
‘Do you feel he always puts you as number one?’
She carried on nodding and sniffed.
‘Just take it slow then, Ruby. Love is the great redeemer. If it is real you will know. I have no doubt about that. Death; bereavement - it’s a horrible business. But it will make you stronger - and you
are
strong, I can tell. It will be all right. That fella up there.’ He pointed to the picture of Jesus at the door. ‘He will make sure of it.’ Kneeling down to her level, he gave her a massive bear hug.
She felt a rush of guilt, as she thought back to the moment when Michael had lain his heart on his sleeve and she had brushed it down onto his cuff and right onto the floor.
He had been so excited when he had pulled her up the steps of Dartmouth Castle. It was a freezing day, and the sea hundreds of metres below was glistening in the winter sun. The view was magnificent and Ruby felt happier than she had done in months.
He grabbed her by the arm and pulled her into a little tiny room within the gun tower. It was big enough for two with a little ledge to sit on. The seagulls shouted their approval at his romantic gesture. The wind whistled through the viewing gaps.
‘This place!’ Ruby was swept away by its beauty.
‘I know. All the history too. This castle was evidently built during Henry VIII’s reign, but there is proof there was a castle here in Saxon times too.’
‘Imagine what’s it’s seen and heard.’ Michael could hear the excitement in Ruby’s voice. ‘I’d love to go back and just be an observer. I feel like that about a lot of history, don’t you?’
‘Ruby?’
‘Yes.’
‘Be quiet a moment.’ He shuffled closer to her on the little ledge, lifted her chin gently and kissed her deeply and passionately. She felt a rush of warmth flow through her and wanted to make love to him there and then.
‘I love you, Ruby,’ Michael whispered as he pulled away.
‘No, no. Don’t ruin it, not now.’ Ruby suddenly shot up and began to run as fast as the tiny winding castle stairs would allow.
He found her sitting on a rock on the beach way below the castle.
‘I’ve known you for less than two months, Michael.’
‘And I’ve known from the minute I met you that you are very special, Ruby. I can’t help the way I feel.’
‘You should have waited. It’s too soon.’
‘Not for me it’s not. I say it how it is - and how it is, is that I love you. I bloody love you.’
‘You don’t even know me.’
‘But I know how I feel.’
***
‘Tits, wanker, bollocks.’ Jimmy pushed the door open, roughly jolting Ruby back to reality and away from her thoughts of the dreadful long journey back from Devon in total silence.
‘Hello, Jimmy. How are you tonight?’
‘Oh you know, all right. Still waiting for Mrs Right. Sick of cooking burgers as I can’t find a proper job.’
‘I didn’t know you were looking. Milky coffee with sugar?’
‘Oh go on then, spoil me, Ruby, and yes - I’ve been looking for months. I’ve got a finance degree and I worked in Accounts for years, but when Jenny died at just thirty-two, I went to pieces.
‘It takes quite a woman to cope with a man with this awful syndrome, you know,’ Jimmy went on. ‘My self-confidence is at an all-time low at the moment.’ His whole body jerked. ‘When I have happy moments I don’t even tic. I really do think if I can get my life on track again and find a decent job and a woman who will take me on warts and all, this damn syndrome won’t be half as bad.’
Ruby made a vow to herself there and then that in ten years she would have made the effort at least to have moved on from her current state of mind. Imagine still grieving after all that time. Poor Jimmy.
Now that he had her attention, he wouldn’t stop.
‘I get the interviews no problem and then they see me and hear me and that’s it.’
Ruby stepped back slightly as she got a stench of the bad breath Simon had warned her about. She for once thought carefully before she spoke. ‘Maybe you should smarten yourself up a bit before the interviews. You know - have a shave, iron your shirt nicely.’
‘That’s exactly what my Jenny would have said.’
‘See? You can do it, Jimmy.’
‘Can I?’
‘Yes, you can.’ Ruby put her hand gently on this arm.
‘Will you help me, please?’
The Fireman crashed through the door with Ellie. They were laughing together loudly.
‘We share the jokes in here!’ Simon shouted from his desk, then whispered to Ruby: ‘Miserable fucking bastards usually.’
Cali sauntered in with a yapping Fanny.
‘AITCHOO! That bloody dog!’
‘Bless you,’ the group resounded.
‘Right, grab your drinks you horrible lot, let’s Bow Wow.’ Simon slurped from his vodka mug. ‘Tonight the topic, my little lost lovers, is…’ He paused and looked at Ruby, who was clearing up in the kitchen.
‘After bereavement, how soon is too soon to fall in love again?’
The mug that Ruby was drying slipped from her fingers and smashed to the floor.