Authors: Claire Jolliff
What did she have left?
She would never
admit it to herself
,
but now that the end was so close in sight that she could practically see the red tape marking off the last portion of the journey, she was making things as difficult as she could. A part of her didn’t want to end this, didn’t want to be left asking herself what she was good for once her crusade for vengeance was gone.
They had stopped a few times to rest, mostly just small breaks to stretch their legs, wander around and try work out all the aches and kinks. They had set up camp twice
, if you could call it that.
Camp
,
in the loosest sense of the word, meaning that they had twice located a relatively dense copse of trees, had hacked their way to a small clearing
,
and then Alecia had lit a fire to chase away some of the chilling cold that seeped into your bones an
d made your teeth chatter. They ha
d huddled around the fire, seeking body heat from one another, feeling the dampness of the ground slowly soak through their clothes until they weren’t just cold and uncomfortable anymore; they were cold
,
and uncomfortable
,
and wet.
The only plus side to the whole thing was that the environment had had no impact on either of their libidos. Leci
genuinely wondered if there was anything at all that might dampen Amato’s appetite, he seemed insatiable at times and she loved it, loved the feeling of being wanted, desired, loved that he couldn’t seem to keep his hands off of her.
When they were cuddled together around a fire it was nice, satisfying
, maybe even better than the times they let their passion completely overtake them, giving into the animalistic desire that coursed through the both of them
,
it was tender
just to be able to hold one another close, to share a special moment
. When they were riding she
sat in front of him, his arms around her as he gripped the reins,
and
he would surprise her occasionally by kissin
g or biting her exposed neck,
most of the time she couldn’t tell if it was the pistol at his hip pressing into the small of her back or if he was just really pleased to be with her.
So, despite her irritation at the whole thing, her unspoken fear
,
and the apprehension that hovered over her like a little black raincloud waiting to burst at any moment, there were up sides too. When she was in a good enough mood for conversation she enjoyed their talks, found that it gave them the opportunity to discover a lot about each other. She supposed that when you were travelling alone with someone for so long
,
you either had to get to know them and appreciate the company or just end up killing one another.
Killing him had occurred to her
,
when his snoring kept
her awake, or when he wouldn’t let her eat because he had decided the meat was ‘diseased’. Leci was proud of her restraint, was almost certain it had to be written somewhere that being driven to murder due to snoring was not a punishable offence.
During the quiet times on the road she found herself either thinking about Xavian
,
or about the Clones. She wondered how they were doing, back at the cabin, hoped they were alright and that they weren’t too worried about her. She felt bad, guilty, for leaving the way she had done and
for
causing so much concern over her whereabouts. She felt worse for being the reason Amato had left them
,
but she consoled herself with the knowledge that they were in no way defenceless. Beriael was a strong guy. He had muscles that were scary big and the bald head
did not
help with the whole ‘I eat live babies’ look that he had going on.
Creepy eyes too.
Though,
that could’ve been because she was so used to seeing them glaring at her, filled with hate and loathing.
Maybe.
And Bitsy, s
he had her freaky mind shit to keep them aware and alert. She’d probably be able to radar the feeling or intentions of anyone who got close long before they were a threat.
Not only that
,
but they had found an arsenal of weapons and ammo stored in the cabin. The old guy looked like
he had made his own bullets, melting them down over his stove. He had a shitload.
They couldn’t really be much more fortified than they were and she was content they were safe.
But that didn’t stop the guilt.
She wished there was some way to get a message to Morgan, let them know that her and Amato were safe; let them know what had happened and where they were heading, what they were doing.
That they might be home soon.
Hopefully.
Leci hadn’t been lying to Amato
,
when she had said that she had never gone back to the place Xavian had died because she had just expected his killers to have moved on.
The transient lifestyle was a common one and was all she had known from birth. It just made s
ense to her that the men would no
t remain in the town where they had committed such a crime,
that they
wouldn’t go back there.
There was no denying though
,
that she had also chosen to avoid the place. Maybe a part of her suspected that they might still be there but had just never had the heart to admit it. She was scared of that place. It held so many bad memories for her and she didn’t like the idea of facing them again.
When those men had left her, beaten and used, laying next to the body of her brother
,
she had wanted to die. She had prayed for the strength and the courage to be able to end herself
,
and when that failed she had asked to be struck down by some almighty hand.
Apparently
,
death had not been on the cards for her.
Full of bitterness towards a world that seemed to have abandoned her entirely, Alecia had lain there for a long time, until the buzzing of the flies around Xavian had stirred her from wherever it was she had retreated to
,
within herself.
Vacant and not entirely aware of herself
,
or
of
her surroundings, one side of her face had been swollen so badly her eye was stuck closed, she could open the other
,
but little more than a slit. Her mouth hung slack, it was painful to try
to
close it. Every inch of her body had ached, bruised and torn, bleeding all over. Her insides felt raw, she was tender everywhere. It hurt to move, hurt to breathe
, hurt to fucking piss
, but the biggest pain was in her heart
,
and she couldn’t just lie there and allow the flies to settle on her brother.
Leci remembered trying to force herself to her feet. It had taken a very long time, she managed to get up once only to totter and fall again, making herself cry as, too weak to hold her arms out to shield her fall, she had hit the ground face first.
In the end she had given up
trying
, had simply dragged herself over to him and then thrown her body protectively over his.
The insects rose from him in a buzzing, angry cloud and dispersed.
Leci had blacked out.
When she had next been tormented with consciousness she had woken to find herself even more of a mess than before. Covered in Xavian’s blood where her body lay against his, feeling it, sticky, tacky on her skin. The flies had returned in greater numbers and
now
covered the two of them like a sheet. She remembered wearily lifting herself to try shoo
ing
them away.
When she was able to stand, holding onto a wall for support, she had left the dim alleyway, loathe to leave her brother’s body for whatever scavengers might find it in her absence
,
but knowing she needed to help herself before she could help him.
Alecia had bathed herself in a trough of dirty water that had stood outside the back of a tavern, washing away the blood and as much of the grime as she could, unable to get rid of the idea that she could still feel those men’s hands on her, feel them invading her body, smell them against her.
She could no
t scrub that away for a long time.
She had rested for a day or two, gaining strength, tendi
ng to her wounds, f
or most of that time she hadn’t left
his side, she h
ad guarded him from the bugs
,
and from stray cats
,
and wild dogs who had been able to smell the rotting flesh and had come in search of a free meal.
Hidden away at the end of a dim and dark alleyway
,
she
hadn’t often had to protect herself or Xavian from other people. When they had come along
,
she had spat and shrieked and ranted and hurled things. People didn’t like to be around crazies, they left pretty quickly, as though afraid of catching some disease. At one point she had left to find food
,
only to come back and see that Xavian’s shoes had been stolen. People had no limits
, no respect
.
When
she felt strong enough, or maybe it was when the stench had become too much to bear any longer, she couldn’t quite remember which, she had dragged the body
away
from town.
It had been hard work, h
e hadn’t been so heavy by then, everything seemed
to have started breaking down, but not being seen was the
difficult part.
People tended to keep to themselves
,
and you could get away with a lot
,
but the sight of a young girl dragging a decomposing corpse through the streets was likely to raise a few eyebrows.
She had waited until the quietest hour of darkness and had kept to back alleyways, using buildings for cover.
She had taken his body some way out of town
,
then had used the shovel that she had stolen to dig a shallow grave for him in hard, cold ground.
He was maybe three, four feet down. She hadn’t had
the energy to dig any further, h
ad been hopeful that the animals wouldn’t find him and that he would be allowed to rest in peace.
Alecia had left the grave unmarked. Marking it would have been
like placing a beacon for looters and robbers. Xavian had nothing at all of value on him but people would dig up his bones anyway just to make sure.
She hadn’t marked it
,
but she knew she would be able to find it again without a second thought.
Chapter 34
She was jostled awake suddenly and sat up with a start, grabbing th
e horse around the neck to stop
from falling
,
as the motion caused her to lose
her
balance. She felt Amato’s hand’s tighten on her hips, holding her steady.
‘I was asleep?’ She murmured, drowsily.
He chuckled softly and kissed her neck.
‘Been asleep a good couple of hours
, b
aby. I didn’t want to disturb you, but we’re here.’
‘We’re here?’ She sat up straighter and looked around.
They were still some distance from Coleville
,
but the large town was unmissable and the sight of it hit her like a battering ram. She felt the breath whoosh out of her and she struggled to stay on the horse as she became dizzy, bile rose in her throat and she fought to keep it down.
They had approached from a different side to where she had left the last time she had been here. She couldn’t see the gravesite from here. She didn’t intend on mentioning it to Amato, she had no plans to visit it. She would be perfectly happy to avoid even ca
tching a glimpse of it at all, i
f this was the reaction she had to the town alone
,
she hated to think how her body might betray her closer to the place where she had interred her brother’s body to the earth.