The Defiance (Brilliant Darkness) (6 page)

Bear takes my arm. "Fenn, wait. There's something you should know."

I stop cold. "What?"

"Fennel . . . I'm so sorry. I thought he was with me." Acacia, usually difficult to tell apart from Calli because their voices are so similar, sounds distraught. "I was collecting the younger children and I assumed he would follow us back to the caves. But when I turned around . . . he wasn't there."

"Wait . . . who?" I have a bad feeling I already know.

"We were washing up down at the water hole, when we heard the flesh-eaters coming. I had several of the younger children, and I thought Eland was with us. I never would have left him behind, Fennel, you know that . . ." Her voice fades as blood pounds in my head.

"No. Not Eland.
Not
.
Eland
." I turn and bolt back through the passage to the cave mouth, my hand bouncing painfully along the wall, panic snapping at my heels.

Bear follows, calling my name. As the cave opens up to the outside, I hear the sick ones. Their groans and shrieks fill the air. It's impossible to think of Eland among them. Or as one of them.

Maybe he found somewhere to hide. Maybe knowing I thought the sick ones weren't harmful was enough to protect him. I have to believe something, anything, other than that he's gone. Bear grabs my hand, yanking me backward.

"Fenn, wait . . . I want to help," he pants. But what can he do?

"Let me go. I have to find him. It might not be too late."

"I'm sorry, Fenn. So sorry."

"Don't say that to me. Not yet." I try to jerk my arm away from him, but he hangs on. "If you think he's already gone, then you don't believe me about the Scourge. If you did believe me, you'd know there's hope."

Some logical part of me, buried under a rockslide of fear, knows that isn't fair. I'm terrified Eland is in danger myself. But I want to lash out at someone, and Bear is the only one here. "I have to go."

"I'm coming with you." His voice is equal parts determined and petrified.

"Bear, no. You can't." I put my hand over his on my arm. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said what I did. Don't put yourself in danger to prove you believe me."

"I won't be in danger. If we believe they can't harm us, then they can't . . . right?"

I walk toward the open air impatiently. The sick ones pace and howl at us a few steps away. "In theory. I'm not willing to let you test it, though. Go back inside. Bring the water."

"I'm going with you." His tone tells me he's done arguing. I try anyway.

"I don't know where Peree is, and now Eland is out there with them." I motion to the creatures. "If you set foot outside this cave, then every male I care about could be in danger. Please stay here. Please. I can't risk losing you, too." I hope he won't read more into that than I mean.

"So you do care what happens to me."

I step away again, moving outside of the shelter of the cave mouth. The sick ones shriek at my back; I raise my voice to be heard. "Of course I care, you stupid boy. You're one of my best friends."

"I'll hold your hand. If I can feel your hand in mine, I think I can do this."

"No! Don't—"

It's too late. He lunges out next to me, grabbing my arm. I can only stand there, too stunned to react. It even seems to surprise the sick ones. But not for long. They surround us.

Bear pulverizes the bones of my hand, but unbelievably he also manages to stand his ground . . . for a few seconds. His grip weakens, and he moans. He sounds like he might pass out from the fear.

“They’re going to . . . no, don’t . . . Fenn! Help me—”

I dash back into the cave mouth, hauling him with me while he's still upright. He crashes to the ground a few steps inside. Other voices approach from the main cavern, probably coming for the water.

"Bear! Are you okay?"

There's no answer. I grab his scruffy cheeks and put my ear to his mouth. He's breathing, thank the stars.

So I leave him to the others and run out into the night, hoping against hope that I can still save my brother. Hoping he had as much courage as Bear did. But not believing for a moment that it would be enough.

Where would he have gone? Kadee and I worked down by the water hole for some time. If he'd been there, and still . . . himself, I would have heard him. Where else could he be?

I search the gardens, listening to the sounds of the sick ones, hoping to make out a word. Rose talked to me after she became one of them. Maybe Eland would, too.
Eland
help me. Help me find you.

I wander, moving slower and slower, and end up by the water hole again. He wouldn't have left the area, not with the sick ones here. Not unless he no longer had the use of his reason.

Grief whispers malevolently in my ear, threatening to dissolve the last of my self-control. I can't lose Eland. How would I survive that? Losing Aloe was hard enough.

"Fennel." A man calls to me from the trees. His voice is quiet, but I still recognize it.

 "Petrel! Eland's out here somewhere. I can't find him. I . . . can't hear him. Kadee and I were so busy with the water—" My words dip and weave. I'm dangerously close to losing it.

"It's okay, Fennel. He's with us."

I shy away from a few of the sick ones groaning for me and automatically lower my voice to match Petrel's, although I could sing with relief. "How did he get up there?"

"I found him hanging on a tree. Said he climbed up when the fleshies came. Sounds like he had to hold on for a long time, but he's fine."

I'm torn between crying and laughing, so I settle for inane chatter. “He is a pretty good climber, although he hasn't had much chance to practice." The Lofties don't allow us to climb their trees. "And I guess he was desperate to get away from the sick ones." But what I'm thinking is:
Eland's alive.

"I came looking for you—figured you'd be worried about him. I can bring you up, but we have to be quick and quiet. Step toward the tree to your left. Here comes a rope."

I do as he says, searching the air over my head with my hands. I tie the rope quickly under my arms when I find it. Petrel pulls me up. Despite his warning, the ascent seems agonizingly slow. As soon as my feet touch the walkway, he hurries me forward without speaking.

Muffled voices carry from other parts of the treetops as we move. Smoke poisons the air. The tree-sickness strikes hard and fast; my stomach flip-flops like I'm somersaulting underwater. I grit my teeth and follow Petrel.

We make a few turns and stop briefly. There's a scraping sound—a door. We walk through, and he shuts it quickly behind us. I rejoice at the familiar scent—the reek of adolescent boy. Eland.

We cling to each other.

"You found her," Moon says. "Good."

"What happened?" I ask Eland. My voice shakes like the hand of an elder.

"I got cut off from Acacia and the others. We were by the water hole and heard the fleshies—I mean the sick ones." He's working on calling the Scourge something different, like Peree and I do. "We started running toward the caves, but a few of them were getting close to the little kids, so I sort of distracted them and took off in another direction. I had to climb a tree to get away, but I only got far enough up so I couldn't be dragged down."

I hug him to me, thinking about what might have happened if he had been forced to let go.

Petrel thumps Eland on the back. I feel it right through my brother's thin chest. "Little man's a hero. Although now that I think about it, he didn't look so heroic hanging onto that tree trunk like an overgrown spider."

I laugh. Thinking of him clinging to a tree, while frightening, is far better than the other, much more horrible scenarios that have haunted me since I heard he didn't make it to the caves.

"Would you like to sit down, Fenn?" Moon asks. She seats Eland and me on the same bench Peree and I shared before. I wish he was here now. "Are you hungry? Eland's already eaten."

She brings me a wooden board, perfectly smooth to the touch, and a small oilskin sack of water. I drink, eat some tart berries I don't think I've tasted before—maybe they only grow in the trees—and take a few bites of bread.

"I'm sorry there's not more," Moon says. "We have to ration ourselves when the fleshies are here, in case they make themselves at home. Petrel, you better go back. They'll be needing you as soon as it's safe to work on the walkway." Moon's voice accelerates as she speaks, like a bird beating its wings faster and faster.

I hear Petrel kiss her. "You okay?"

"We're fine. Go on, now. It'll look suspicious if you aren't out there helping."

Petrel leaves, closing the door firmly behind him. Abruptly, I realize the danger we may be putting Peree's family in by being up here.

"I'm sorry," I say to Moon. "I know this isn't exactly a great time to be harboring a couple of Groundlings. We don't want to cause you any trouble."

"Nothing we can do about it now," she replies, not unkindly. "And we should be okay; everyone was so focused on the fires . . . But what happened, Fennel? Of course people are claiming the fires were started by a Groundling, but how would one of your people even get up here? And why would a Groundling set a fire in the
caves
, the only place you can go when the fleshies come? That doesn't make much sense, does it?"

I tell them about the whisperer’s threats. Eland slides closer to me.

Moon makes a disgusted sound. "We finally have a chance to figure out how to work together, and someone has to go and do something stupid like this. I can't understand it."

"Where's Peree?" Eland asks.

"I'll leave that one for you to explain," Moons says to me, chuckling. She struggles to her feet, grunting a little. Eland and I hop up to help her. "I'm going to go see if I'm needed in the kitchens and make sure Thrush isn't underfoot. People are going to be tired and hungry after fighting the fire all evening.”

"What about the hunting party?" I ask her.

"Oh, we won't start worrying about them for a few days, at least. They always carry enough supplies to hole up in the trees for a while in case something like this happens. Don't worry, Fennel. Peree can take care of himself." She's bustling around the shelter now. Even heavily pregnant, she’s full of energy. I imagine she's a force of nature when she's not carrying a child.

"Now, you two stay in here,” she says. “Petrel will come for you when it's safe to go back down. Okay?"

"Thank you, again, Moon. I hope we haven't caused you any trouble."

I embrace her for the second time in two days, molding myself around her belly. They took a big chance, rescuing Eland and bringing me up here to be with him. And I just felt exactly how much they have to lose.

When Moon leaves, I take the opportunity to explore how their home is laid out. It's circular in shape, with the thick, supporting tree occupying the center of the space.

The sitting area is near the door, and the sleeping area is around the back of the tree, allowing the family a little privacy. There are two beds—one must belong to Moon's brother, Thrush—and several windows, which we avoid. Fading light filters in from outside. Evening can't come soon enough for me. I need to get Eland back to the relative safety of the caves, but we should wait until it’s dark.

The furniture in the shelter is solid and well built, and there's more of it than I'm used to. I keep knocking my shins and already-sore knees on things like chairs and extra tables. The hazards of visiting the home of a woodworker, I guess. Carved into the tree trunk are small niches, places to store extra clothing, dishes, and a pitcher and basin for washing up.

Our shelter is about half the size of this one, although we had the same number of people living in it until Aloe was killed. Now that I think about it, the shelters in Koolkuna were larger than ours too. Maybe bigger, permanent homes are somehow a result of enjoying more safety and security. I wouldn't know. We haven't had that luxury.

Eland and I plunk down on the floor in the back, by the bed, to wait for Petrel to return. I wonder what's happening on the ground. The people will be distraught to be back in the caves again. At least I was able to deliver some water before I disappeared to find Eland. I hope Fox, Pinion, and Bream can get everyone organized and keep them calm. This is the first real test of the new Council's authority. Not that it's been exactly easy for them so far.

"Fenn?" Eland says.

"Hmm?" I put my arm around him.

"I tried. To think of them as human. To believe what you told us, that they wouldn't consume me, or turn me into one of them." He pauses. "I stood there while they got closer to me . . . but it was really, really hard. They look so scary, Fenn. Their faces . . . the blood and stuff . . . and all that screaming. I tried, but I couldn't do it."

I nod. "You don't need to feel bad. Even after Peree and I drank the pure water from the Myuna, and I could hear them speak, it was still hard to believe."

"Where
is
Peree?" he asks. I can feel him studying my face as I fill him in on Peree’s illegal activities.

"He'll be okay,” Eland says. “They only have to hold out until the Scour—, I mean the sick ones, go away."

"And when will that be, O Wise One?"

"Everyone says they won't stay as long as last time. Not even the elders remember hearing about them staying that long. It was a fluke."

I sit back against the wall, pulling him against me. "Hope you're right."

"Wow. If Adder had known the Lofties sneak off to hunt like that, he would've gone bat shit sooner."

I nudge him. "Watch your language. And don't tell anyone about it. Things are too tense right now to risk the Three finding out." I smooth my dress over my legs. "I wish Aloe were here."