The Divine Path (The Divine Series) (5 page)

             
“I can’t do this,” Kade said as he lifted her off and rolled out from under her. 

“What did I do wrong
?” Darcienna asked, completely at a loss.  “Kade…,” she started to say, but he waved her to silence.

What he wanted to say was
that he wanted her more than he wanted life itself.  He wanted to pull her into his arms, look deep in her eyes and then lose himself in her kiss.  He wanted this so much that his heart ached.  But, if she found the one she was looking for, the pain he would feel would crush him beyond recovery, and he knew this more certainly than anything.  He knew what it was to feel the loss of someone that meant everything to him. He was not going to watch her go into the arms of another.  He could not think of a more hurtful thing to do to himself than to believe that he could have her only to lose her at a later time.  She was more than just a piece of flesh.  She was Darcienna.

She sat on the ground, confused, studying Kade, trying to read his thoughts as the expression on his face changed rapidly.  She was sure she could see love in his eyes when he looked at her.  But in the next instant, it would change to such sadness that she could feel tears threaten to well up in her
own eyes.  Then, it felt as if a wall a mile thick was growing between them.  The wall grew and grew as she watched.  Her heart felt as if someone had reached in and was squeezing little by little. 

Do you not want me?
she agonized as she looked at him. 
Why would you not let me in?  What is it that you are not telling me?  What would it take to get you to open up to me and be mine?
she asked as she stared at the ground.  She could see as clearly as day that he wanted her.  He wanted her in many ways and she wanted him also, so why fight it?

Darcienna stood and dusted off
her clothes.  She turned away to hide her face and took several steps without looking back.  Well, she intended not to look back, but after a dozen steps or so, she glanced over her shoulder.  She saw him watching her, and for just a moment, she saw him looking through a crack in that wall and then it was gone.  She stopped and stared down at nothing, trying to convince herself she was not hurt.  While she watched, a single teardrop hit the ground and sent a small puff of dust into the air.  She wiped her face and swallowed hard.  He had his reasons.  When he was ready, he would bring down that wall, but for now, he had his reasons.  She just had to be patient and be there for him.  The more her mind followed this line of thinking, the better she felt.  She stole a glance at him and saw him standing as still as a statue.

Kade watched her walk away and confusion clouded his mind.  His gut said he had made a mistake. 
But, how could protecting my heart be a mistake?
he asked himself. 
Am I wrong?
he pondered as his eyes slowed crept along the ground until he was looking at her. 

For a moment, he could have sworn she was looking at him, but when he focused on her, she was standing still, staring at the ground.  He wanted to go to her and confess how he felt.  Yes, this felt right.  Either she was going to forget this other guy and be his
or he would have no choice but to send her away at the earliest possible moment before there was no turning back for his heart.  One way or another, he would have it figured out before he got too hurt.  He decided that this was, indeed, the right decision.  He turned, and before he could take one step, Rayden roared.  Kade felt his heart leap so far into his throat that he almost choked.

“Blood and a
sh and all that is Holy with the Divine, Rayden!” Kade swore loudly as he clutched his chest.  “Do you ever stop eating?” he asked angrily, recognizing the hunger that came through the link.  He regretted his words instantly.  He dropped his head to his chest, feeling the disappointment through the connection.  Rayden sank to the ground and dropped his head heavily onto his front legs as his ears wilted.  “Do I have to mess up everything?” Kade asked, cursing himself for not thinking before he spoke.  It was a habit he just had to break.  His dragon had just spent the day carrying them without complaint, and now that it wanted to eat, he rebuked it.

Darcienna narrowed her eyes as she contemplated what he had just said. 
Was he referring to me, also?  Did he think he made a mistake by pushing me away?

“Rayden,” Kade
said as he dropped to his knees and gently stroked the dragon’s head.  “You know I love you,” Kade said, and then his eyes focused past the dragon to lock with Darcienna’s.  “You mean more to me than I ever expected,” he said as he refocused on the dragon.  “I am not perfect and I am going to make mistakes, but if you can accept that, then I will always be in your life,” Kade said as he looked past the dragon again, but there was no one there. He wrapped his arms around the dragon’s neck and hugged.  “Please forgive my rudeness.  If you can find it in your heart to accept my apology, I am sure I can feed that deep pit you call a stomach,” Kade said as he stood and stepped back.  He almost started laughing as he ran his hands through his hair.  It was probably the one and only time he would be okay with the dragon drenching his hair with slobber.

“Would you like something to eat
?” Kade asked as he turned to look for Darcienna.

“Food would be great,” Darcienna said as she moved out from behind the dragon.  “You going to make us some
?” she asked, as she thought about the beautiful words she had just heard.  She could not help but to smile as she recalled the way he had looked past the dragon and locked eyes with her for just a moment as he spoke.  Even though he meant it for the dragon, she could not help pretending he meant it for her, also.

“Yes,” Kade said, grateful that he and Darcienna were talking, again.

Kade made a piece of meat and went to hand it to Darcienna, who waved it away for the dragon.  She always put others first, and it made him love her even more.  She had an amazing heart, and if he was worthy, it would belong to him. 

If only I am
worthy
, he thought as his father’s words rang in his ears.  He shook it off and focused on attempting to satisfy Rayden’s hunger.  After feeding nature’s best devourer of food, he turned his attention to Darcienna.

“I can’t believe that such a simple calling would turn out to be so useful,” Kade said as he handed the next piece of steaming meat to her.  She took it graciously and sat on a fallen log, waiting for him to join her.  “I wish Zayle would have taught me this one, sooner,” he said as he sat next to her.

“Maybe he didn’t because he knew that you would become as big as a cabin if he did,” Darcienna said, more her old self.  Kade felt such an immense relief wash over him that he did not care that he had dropped his food on the ground.  The tension was gone as if it had never been.

“Here,” Kade said as he tossed the dirty piece of meat to the dragon.  Rayden was clearly not picky as he snapped up the food
with a slight bit of sand flavoring and swallowed it without chewing.

Kade made another chu
nk of meat and return to sit next to Darcienna.  He smiled, happy that she was looking at him again with those heart-stopping eyes.  He took several large bites and noticed the disapproving look from her at his eating manners.  After two more intentionally large mouthfuls, he took two smaller bites.  Darcienna gave just the slightest hint of a smile as she seemed to focus on her own meat, but something told Kade that the smile was meant for him.  He sighed and proceeded to eat the rest of his food, not in small bites, but not the large chunks he had previously taken, either.

“How long until we reach this other Chosen
?” Darcienna asked.

“About half a day’s ride,” Kade said past the food in his mouth.  Darcienna gave him another disapproving look.  He took a deep steadying breath, then swallowed the meat in one big gulp and repeated, “About half a day’s ride.”

For reasons he was not able to fathom, she still had a reproving look.  He just shook his head, clearly lost as to what he had done wrong now and looked around to see if any streams ran past.  He wished he had the foresight to bring some water, but once again, he found himself thirsty without anything to drink.

“What are you looking for
?” Darcienna asked.

“Water,” Kade said.

“Why don’t you just conjure some?”

“Because it is a food calling, not a drink calling,”
Kade said with a hint of irritation.

“How would the Divine know the difference?  If you wanted to create grapes, could you
?” Darcienna asked simply.

“I suppose,” Kade said, pondering her line of thinking.

“Then, if you can make grapes, which are used to make wine, then you should be able to make wine, right?”

“Maybe,” Kade said.  He narrowed his eyes as he studied the idea.  “It is worth a try,” he added, curious
ly.  He stood and closed his eyes, eager to test out her idea.  He performed the calling while picturing a nice bottle of sweet wine.  Within seconds, he felt the liquid materialize in his hands and proceed to splash on the ground, getting his legs wet.  Kade jumped back and gave Darcienna an accusing look, but she didn’t seem to notice. 

“Well, it seems the bottle is not organic, so that is not going to work.  So, I guess it needs to be organic.  All we need to do is find some way to catch the wine,” Darcienna said as if stating the most obvious fact.

“I suppose that would work,” Kade said as he looked around the area.

“Good,” Darcienna said, happy with h
ow this was going.

Kade watched as her eyes stopped on something on the other side of the dragon.  He turned to see what she had found as she got to her feet.  Darcienna walked around Rayden to a torok tree.  It was perfect.  Its leaves were cone shaped and made for catching rainwater.  It was a survival skill of the tree, but tonight, it would be used to catch wine.

“This should work,” Darcienna said with a smile.  “I will hold it under your hands while you perform the calling.”

Kade, begrudgingly, had to admit that her ability to look at things differently helped them find a solution.  Even with hands that were becoming sticky with the drying wine, he was grateful for her creative thinking.  He smiled at the thought of tasting the sweet drink and was eager to try again.

“Okay, let’s make some wine,” Kade said as he started the Food Calling.  He felt the wine splash past his hands just as it did the first time.  He opened his eyes and saw Darcienna proudly displaying the cup of liquid.  He could not help but to smile at her pure innocence.  There was nothing but the honest intent to help.  She was not trying to show him that she was superior because of her creative way of thinking, nor was she gloating about finding a solution.  It was just pure altruism.

Kade held his breath as she lifted the makeshift cup to her
lips, afraid she would cough and sputter at what was supposed to be wine.  He recalled his failed attempts when he first tried to make meat and dreaded the same outcome.  Darcienna took a sip and nodded her head in approval.  Kade breathed a sigh of relief.   Darcienna lifted the cup to her lips again, and took two deep swallows with her eyes closed, savoring the taste.  She handed it back to Kade, who did the same.  He handed the cup back to her and she took the last drink.  He filled the leaf several times, giving them both more than their fair share. 

Darcienna wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.  How she was able to do this and still look proper was beyond him, but he was sure if he had done the same, it would have earned him a disapproving look.  But
, then again, she could do almost anything, and it would be fine with him.

“That was a good idea,” Kade said, feeling the effects of the wine.

“I can’t believe I drank that much,” Darcienna said, barely able to form her words.

Feeling the ground start to rock, Kade held onto Rayden to keep from falling.  He turned his back to the dragon an
d slid down to the ground.  He put his hands on his stomach as he leaned back.

“You know, you look a little familiar,” Kade said as he studied her for a moment.

“Of course I do.  You know me,” Darcienna said with a giggle.

“I do
?” Kade asked, almost grasping something.  It was right there.

“Yes silly.  We have been traveling together for about two or three days now,” Darcienna said with anther giggle.

“Oh,” Kade said, but he was still studying her as if that answer was not good enough.

“Kade, don’t you think we should be getting some sleep
?” Darcienna asked, trying to change the subject.

“Yes, we should,” Kade said
, enjoying the feeling he was experiencing from the drink.

Getting to his feet a little clumsily, Kade turned to find tha
t Rayden was already in the world of dreams.  He looked around for a soft spot to sleep for the night and saw a clump of moss beneath the torok tree.  With a little coxing, he convinced Darcienna to lie down on the soft patch. She patted the very small spot of moss next to her, and seeing no reason why he should not, he did as she bid.  They talked for a while, until Darcienna no longer answered his questions.  He leaned over to see her eyes closed and watched her breathing deeply.  For a moment, he considered moving away, but he did not want to leave her alone, and what better way to make sure she was safe than to be right there with her.  He lay on his back as he looked up at the stars, feeling at peace.  Soon, he drifted off to sleep.  Darcienna snuggled into him, and he draped his arm around her.  They would stay like that for most of the night.