A soft breeze off the ocean rustled through their hair as cool waves lapped playfully at their feet. The sky was a bright, deep blue with just a hint of wispy clouds scattered high and far away. Seagulls clucked merrily overhead, flapping their wings noisily as they dove into the ocean to catch an early breakfast.
It was going to be a beautiful day. It had been a splendid night. He and Michelle had made sweet love until the wee hours of dawn before he sneaked back to the third bedroom to avoid Precious finding them in the same bed.
“So are you and Michelle going to have a baby, Daddy?”
“Precious, babies don’t come from kissing.”
“Yes, they do.”
“Who told you that?”
“I asked Mommy where I came from and she said you were kissing, and I grew in her tummy then you took me out. Sam Martin at my school tries to kiss me, but I don’t want a baby, Daddy. I wouldn’t know what to do with it, and my tummy’s way too small.”
Erik stopped walking and closed his eyes, momentarily at a loss for words. It took all his effort to hide his humor. Precious was too young to understand the facts of life, but he could not have her believing babies came from kissing someone of the opposite sex. And he was definitely going to have a little chat with this Sam Martin. He spoke in as casual a tone as the delicate situation afforded. “Precious, babies don’t come from kissing.”
“Mommy lied to me?”
Caught in a pickled jam, Erik stooped down to her eye level. “No. She didn’t,” he said firmly, taking her hands in his. “It does start with kissing, though. When two people like each other, they enjoy touching, hugging, and kissing each other.”
“You like Michelle?”
“Yes.”
Love her
. His forehead wrinkled as a faint memory from last night flashed across his mind.
Did he say it
? “I enjoy kissing her and hugging her, but it takes a lot more than kissing to make a baby.”
“Like what?” Her eyes were wide and questionable.
Erik stood up. Here he was, a gynecologist, and he was too embarrassed to discuss the facts of life with his daughter.
Damn
. He didn’t ever want to explain sex to her. He wanted her to remain his sweet innocent baby, forever. “It’s complicated. When you’re older, I’ll explain it.” She needed a mother. He was more certain of that now than ever.
“How old?” she asked, skipping merrily along beside him.
“About fifty,” he grumbled.
“Fifty? I’ll be too old to have a baby then.”
“That’s the idea.” He grinned down at her scowling face. “Okay. Maybe in a year or so.”
“Okay. I’ll remind you.”
“I’m sure you will.”
“Daddy?”
“What now?”
“If you and Michelle get married and have a baby, will she be my mommy, too?”
She already is
. “I suppose so.”
“I think she’d make a great mommy.”
“You think so, huh?”
“Hmm.” She threw back her head and smiled at him.
Erik squeezed her tiny fingers. “I smell banana pancakes and sausages all the way down here. You think those are Michelle’s?”
She wrinkled her nose. “Yeah. We better hurry before she eats them all up. I’m really hungry,” she said, rubbing her tummy.
“Me, too.” He picked Precious up, and with one swift motion, tossed her over his shoulders. Her soft giggles blended harmoniously with his deep chuckles as he trotted in a happy gait back to the cottage and Michelle.
Erik couldn’t remember ever being this happy. Life was smiling on him once more.
After breakfast, they took the ferry across Nantucket Sound to Nantucket Island and spent half the day touring the island and shopping exclusive stores.
Michelle couldn’t believe how easily Erik dished out money on her and his child. Her protests were lost on him. Last night, she learned he was a man who always got what he wanted. He had ways to make her do things, try positions she didn’t even know were possible.
When she’d asked how he became such a master at the art of love, he’d grinned and said, “The Kama Sutra, baby.” Then he’d explained some of the Tantric and Taoist secrets of love to her. If every man on the planet would take the time to learn those secrets, all women would walk around with stupid grins on their faces all day, Michelle thought. She was blessed to be one of the grinning, lucky ones.
“Come in here for a minute.” Erik edged Michelle into a small jewelry shop. “You have one more birthday gift coming.”
“You just bought me three gorgeous dresses and a Prada purse, Erik. I think that’s more than enough.”
Ignoring her, he pulled her over to a middle-aged man behind a glass counter.
“Erik, you made it,” the man said as he pulled a pair of thick spectacles from his face. He smiled at Precious. “She’s getting more beautiful every day, man. Wait until she starts dating. You’ll be wearing a hole in your floor and tearing your hair out.”
Erik chuckled. “So that’s why you’re bald, Joel?”
“Mock all you want, man. Your day will come.”
“I know, and I’m not looking forward to it.” He placed his hand in the small of Michelle’s back. “This is Michelle. The birthday girl.”
Michelle exchanged a smile with the kindly man who immediately reached behind the counter and handed Erik a small gift-wrapped box.
Erik handed the box to Precious.
Precious handed it to Michelle, a dazzling smile lighting up her perfect little face. “Happy birthday, Michelle.”
“Come on, guys.”
“You don’t want my present?” Precious asked, pouting.
“Of course, honey.” She glanced at Erik, knowing that he knew she would never say no to Precious. She reluctantly took the box.
“Open it,” Precious chirped excitedly.
“Okay.” She pulled off the wrapper and flipped the lid on the black velvet box. A pair of platinum, heart-shaped earrings, with two huge diamonds nestled in the base of the hearts, dazzled her. Michelle gasped. They must have cost a small fortune. “Erik, I can’t accept these,” she said adamantly, holding the box out to him. Wife or not, this was too much.
His eyes twinkled, mischievously. “You can’t refuse a present from Precious.”
“Please, Michelle. I picked them out myself on the computer,” Precious wailed.
So that’s what they were doing on the laptop while she was getting dressed after breakfast. She’d come downstairs just as they were putting it away. They looked like they’d been caught with their hands in the proverbial cookie jar.
“But these?” She eyed the jewelry skeptically.
“You don’t like?” Joel asked.
Michelle glanced around to find that they were the main attention of the few other patrons in the small store. She was causing a scene. She gathered Precious to her. “Thank you. This is the best gift I’ve ever received. I’ll wear them always, starting now.” She pulled a pair of zirconias studs from her earlobes and dropped them in her purse.
“I’ll help,” Erik offered, moving closer to her. “You are a LaCrosse woman and you should be spoiled like one,” he whispered for her ears only.
The warm touch of his hands made Michelle tremble. Even after making love with him all night, her body still craved to dance beneath his fingers. She couldn’t wait for night to fall again.
They had a light seafood lunch then spend the other half of the day on the Children’s Beach on Harbor View Way next to the Steamship Wharf. Precious met up with some of the kids from the beach yesterday and played softball and other games into the early afternoon.
They went back to the cottage to shower and dress for dinner at a local restaurant, not as posh as Andreas’, but elegant, nonetheless. Michelle wore one of the dresses Erik had bought her that day. Erik surprised her with a cake, and the staff and other patrons sang happy birthday to her. They were worn out and dragging by the time they returned to the cottage, and it didn’t take long before an exhausted Precious fell soundly asleep.
Michelle was waiting in bed when Erik finally emerged from the bathroom with a towel hitched around his hips. Judging from the subtle tent in front of him, Michelle knew he was ready—ever ready—for her.
She pulled back the covers with a smile. Erik dropped the towel to the floor and climbed into bed next to her. He bent over and kissed her lips. Words were unnecessary between them. He kissed her deeply and thoroughly while his hands played with her breasts. The smooth length of his penis grazed her thighs, sending pleasure shocks through her. And just as she was about to melt with desire, he released her mouth and said, “Precious thinks we’re having a baby.”
Michelle’s eyes flew open. “What? Why?”
“She saw us kissing last night.”
“Oh, no.” Michelle pounded her fist into the mattress. “Erik, suppose we’d made love on the sofa.”
“It would have scarred her for sure. We have to be careful. I don’t want her confused.”
Michelle stiffened at his words. Well, she was the child’s nanny, not her mother. It wasn’t like she and Erik had made their marriage known to her, or anyone else. This, right here, was the reason he’d married her.
“I’m sorry. That came out wrong.” He kissed the corners of her mouth.
Michelle shrugged. “I understand. It’s okay.”
“It’s not okay.” He rolled off of her and turned on his back, staring up at the ceiling. “You’re my wife. I shouldn’t be worrying about our relationship confusing my daughter.”
Michelle turned on her side, propped her elbow on the pillow and cradled her head in her hand. “Erik, you married me for this, and I went along with my mind, heart, and soul wide open. You’re still confused about your feelings for me, so it’s—”
“I’m not confused.”
“Even so, I’m her nanny, still.”
“She thinks you’d make a great mommy.”
Michelle grinned. “She said that?”
“Her exact words.” His eyes softened as he gazed into hers. “And I agree. It’s just that—” He closed his eyes and sighed.
“What?”
“I learned something in D.C.” He paused and took a deep slow breath. “You remember I told you Cassie and I were on our way home from a birthday party in Manchester the night she was killed?”
Michelle nodded, remembering too well the pain in his voice as he’d confided in her the first day on the job.
“Well, we were arguing about a conversation I overheard between her and Clayton—the birthday boy who used to be one of my best friends and colleague. He was telling her to tell me the truth because he couldn’t lie to me anymore.”
Michelle was not going to ask if they were having an affair. She didn’t want to know. “You don’t have to tell me, Erik.”
“They weren’t having an affair,” he voiced her thoughts. “I accused them of it, though. I was badgering Cassie to either deny or admit the affair. I mean, what else was I to think?” He sighed again. “I should have known Cassie well enough to know she would never do something like that. But I was blinded by jealousy. After she died, I asked Clayton to tell me what the secret was, but he refused. Then he resigned from the hospital and went to Africa.”
Michelle watched him closely, wondering what else besides an affair his wife could have done. It got so quiet in the room, she could hear the ticking of his watch on the bureau, four feet away.
He wiped a hand slowly down his face. “Clayton was at the convention in D.C. I was not leaving without answers. He finally told me that Cassie had her tubes tied after Precious was born. He said he kept quiet after she died because he thought the truth would hurt me even more.”
Michelle gasped in shock. No wonder he’d tossed his wedding band in the Potomac River. “You had no idea?”
He shook his head.
“Why would she do something like that?”
“A while ago, my mother told me that before we were married, Cassie saw a psychic who told her she’d die young.”
“Oh my gosh, Erik.”
“Apparently it was to happen in childbirth.” He snickered sarcastically, and Michelle knew it was to cover his pain, his guilt. “I wanted to start a family immediately after we were married, but she wanted to wait. It took three years of begging before she agreed to have Precious.” His chest heaved on another sigh. “She didn’t trust me enough to confide in me, so she had her tubes tied. And for five more years, she laid in my bed and made love with me, listening to me go on and on about having more children, knowing she could not give them to me, and not saying a word.” Anger and betrayal were evident in his voice and eyes.
“I can’t imagine what it’s like to have somebody you love lie to you like that,” Michelle said in an attempt to comfort him. “My little fib about my father was eating me up inside. I’m so grateful you forgave me for lying to you.”
Thinking about the irony of the matter, Erik shook his head. The thing is, if Cassie hadn’t deceived him, there would’ve been no secret, no conversation between her and Clayton for him to overhear, no suspicions, no fight in the car, no hopping out into the road at the very moment that drunk came along. And there would have been no Michelle.
“I don’t know if I would have forgiven Cassie if she’d told me the truth that night,” he said, stroking his hand up and down Michelle’s arm. “I don’t know if I could have stayed with her, even if I’d forgiven her. Maybe our love would have survived it.
I don’t know
. One thing I do know for certain is that I loved her and I did not want her dead.” His voice shook with sorrow. “Precious should not have had to suffer the loss of her mother. She should not have to grow up without her. That’s my biggest regret in all of this.”
Michelle stretched out beside him and laid her head on his chest. His heart beat heavily beneath her ears. His pain became hers. He’d been deceived by the woman he’d shared his life with. It would be hard for him to trust another woman again. Even her, who brought him so much pleasure.
So what if he didn’t remember yelling out his love in the heat of passion last night? The knowledge was alive in her heart. And just a minute ago, if she dared be presumptuous, he’d spoken of his love for Cassie in the past tense.