Authors: Rob Stennett
The crowd complied; they started to walk backwards, away from this crazy screaming man holding a shotgun at a police officer.
Some backed up all the way until they had disappeared into the cornfield. Quickly, there was breathing room around Jeff and
he felt better.
No one would be able to sneak up on him now.
But suddenly Jeff saw a man who wasn’t sneaking at all. He was charging like a possessed rottweiler. And Jeff could hear this
man shouting/snarling, “The message must go on. The message must go on.” He just said it like that over and over, charging
at Jeff.
Jeff did not want to take the gun off of Mike’s head. He said, “Stop! Don’t make me pull the trigger!”
But the snarling man didn’t even slow down. His eyes were glowing and he was staring at Jeff, repeating to himself that the
message would go on. Jeff took the gun off Mike and aimed it right at the guy charging. “Take another step and I
will
shoot. I swear to God I’ll shoot you right here!”
But it was pointless. The charging man wasn’t going to stop. He wasn’t going to slow down. He was going to tackle Jeff or
die in the process. So Jeff aimed the gun right at him and put his finger over the trigger. He didn’t want to kill this guy.
But he gave him ample warning. Pulling the trigger was the only option. So, Jeff stood there with the gun aimed at this man,
waiting for the courage to pull the trigger and save his family.
The courage never came.
Before Jeff knew what had happened, this man had barreled into him and sent the shotgun flying. Jeff was knocked clean off
his feet and his head thwacked against the gravel road.
And that was the last thing Jeff remembered for a while.
When Jeff came to, everything was blurry. He tried to move his lips but they were taped shut. He tried to move his arms but
he could feel ropes pinning them to his body. Eventually, Jeff’s eyesight came into enough focus that he could see everything
around him. He could see Emily on one side of him tied to a chair and Amy on the other side also tied down. Next to Amy was
Will, somehow looking brave and strong as ever.
Jeff looked off the edge of the billboard and could see everyone scurrying around like ants. Jeff had never been on top of
a billboard before, but he was amazed at how high it was. Their chairs were on a lip that jutted out from the billboard, but
the lip wasn’t very wide. It was made for guys to stand on while they plastered a new image on the billboard. It was not made
for a chair. At that moment Jeff could see himself falling off the billboard and breaking every bone in his body. How embarrassing
would that be? So Jeff tried to think about keeping his body perfectly balanced.
And he tried to think about how he could get his family off the billboard. But the ropes were on really tight. What sort of
boy scout tied these? He wasn’t getting out of them anytime soon. There was no choice but to sit with his family and watch
this from on high. At least they were together. Still, he wished he knew what time it was. He wished he knew how much time
was left. By the looks of things, not much, because there were a lot more people gathered beneath the billboard now. And as
Jeff stared at the group below he realized there were two groups now.
Jeff strained to try and hear what the groups were saying to each other. He knew one group was the Realists. They wanted his
son and now his whole family up here to prove their point. And it didn’t take too much imagination to guess who the second
group was. The Prepared had heard what was going on underneath the billboard and they were gathering to see what was going
on. Jeff wasn’t sure, they may have been gathering here anyway. In his couple of hours as a member of the Emergency Police
Force he’d heard rumblings about where the Prepared would gather to wait for the end.
Some of the guys said the Prepared would gather in a graveyard because conventional wisdom was that the dead would be raptured
first. That’s how it would all start. And what a sight that would be. But how would it work? Would the dead rip out of the
ground and pull themselves out of their coffins like vampires? Or would it be much simpler? Would they pass through the ground
and up towards heaven like friendly ghosts? Some of the Prepared wanted to see for themselves. Others weren’t that interested;
they would go to bed for the night and they never planned to wake up in the natural sense. They would just sleep, and while
they dreamt, God would grab onto them and take them home.
And some were determined to gather in the cornfields. Many thought that “The harvest will begin when the rooster crows” meant
that God’s harvest of souls would begin in the cornfield, where, of course, the actual harvest was supposed to begin as well.
Still, it seemed like a lot of the Prepared were there at that moment. Jeff thought this was probably because the ruckus the
Realists were making with all of the bonfires, shouting, and the family tied to chairs probably drew out some of the Prepared
who were just going to sleep or hang out in the graveyard while they waited to see how things would play out.
And as Jeff continued looking at the crowd underneath the billboard, he realized it stretched down the road as far as the
eye could see. It was as if the outside of the cornfield was a large amphitheater and his family was the opening act.
The newcomers were saying things like, “This is an abomination. How can you leave that family up there? God will strike you
down.”
“No, he won’t!” someone from the other side of the crowd was shouting. “That’s the whole point. He’s not going to do anything.”
Arguments like that were breaking out everywhere. Jeff could pick out bits and pieces of them. And they were all the same:
You’re wrong and we’re right. You’re foolish and we’re brilliant. You don’t understand and we do.
After a while Jeff grew very uninterested in the conversations. The skyline was starting to glow. It would be 6:11 soon, the
sun would rise, and one way or another, this would all be over. If God was up there, he was stretching his fingers and getting
ready to make his opening move. And as Jeff sat up straight, looking down on all of his friends and neighbors, he wondered
for the first time in his life what it would be like to be God. What would it be like to have a bird’s eye view of these arguments
every single day from the beginning of human history until today? Watching people shouting and accusing and pushing back at
one another but never listening or trying to understand one another. It must be maddening. Jeff would want to bring on the
apocalypse too if he were God. He would want to end this all.
Jeff took his focus away from the crowd down below. He caught eyes with his son and tried to give him a look that said everything.
A look that said, I’m so proud of you and you’ve shown me so much in the last week, saving your school when no one else would,
protecting your mom, and coming back for your sister because your father couldn’t think straight enough to save her.
Jeff looked at Emily. He looked her straight in the eye and thought, You, you look like a princess. You probably would have
been crowned homecoming queen. But you left it all to save your little baby brother, and they pulled you up here and tied
you up and I’m so sorry, honey. But I’m proud of you, Emily. And I love you.
Then Jeff looked at his wife. He locked eyes with her and he’d swear he could see Amy’s eyes smile back at him as a tear rolled
down her face and over the duct tape on her mouth. Jeff wanted to reassure her. He wanted the look on his face to say, “I
know things haven’t been easy from the moment we met. I know it’s been such a difficult and frightening journey. But I’ve
loved every step of it. I’ve loved taking every step with you. I’m so grateful that you were brought into my life.”
Jeff knew that sometimes a look and what’s left unsaid can be much more powerful than words. Still, he wished he could pry
his arms loose and rip the duct tape from his mouth and tell his family everything. He hoped he’d get a chance to someday.
But all of a sudden he knew that chance would never come. Not in this life anyway. Because that’s when a light appeared from
heaven. It was as bright as the sun itself. Maybe brighter. It was shining right on all of them. And Jeff could see everyone
below cease their bickering and stare at the light. The wind started to rush over the crowd and everyone’s hair seemed to
toussle from side to side.
And as they all stared at the light, Jeff knew this was it. This was his last moment on earth. He was going to be sucked up
into eternity and he was so incredibly frightened. He wasn’t ready to face God. And then for a moment he thought, What if
God doesn’t want me? God could read his thoughts, couldn’t He? He is God, after all. God would know that Jeff had been such
a cynic since the beginning. God would know that Jeff never had any real faith in the first place. God could see through his
soul with X-ray vision. And when God knew the truth, He would leave Jeff behind. He would take Jeff’s whole family and leave
Jeff to sit alone on the stairs and read his Bible like in that really bad rapture movie Amy had made him watch one time.
And then the light spoke. It told the crowd, “Everyone needs to go home. If you do not, you will be placed under arrest.”
Jeff didn’t know God placed people under arrest.
Quickly, the light twisted, and Jeff could see that it wasn’t from heaven at all. It was from a helicopter, a police helicopter
from Salina. It was hovering above with its spotlight pointing down on all of them. Then Jeff could hear the sirens. Lots
of them lapping over one another. Screaming, letting everyone below know that law and order was coming. A line of cop cars
appeared, casting red and blue light all across the cornfields and everyone who was gathered. Cops with riot gear jumped out
of the cars and shouted at everyone to cease and desist. Jeff saw the young officer from earlier jump out of his cruiser and
start pointing with authority.
Jeff and his family watched the aftermath of the police arrival safely from atop the billboard. Some in the crowd fought back
and were arrested. Some just ran away down the road or into the cornfields. Many jumped in their cars and drove away while
others peacefully talked with officers, probably trying to explain their side of things and what had happened and/or what
was about to happen.
Then the young officer climbed the side of the billboard and began to cut through the ropes. He took the duct tape off their
mouths. There was so much to say once they were free, but all any of the Hendersons could manage to say was, “Thank you.”
When they were off the billboard, the officer told Jeff, “Take your family home. I know a lot’s happened tonight, but I can
cover for that. You just take your family home.” Jeff looked at the skyline again. It was getting brighter. The sun was about
to rise.
“You were our ride,” Jeff said.
“Right,” the young officer said. He fished some keys out of his pocket. “Take my car. It’s right over there. I’ll come get
it later.”
“Okay,” Jeff said. “What time is it?”
“Just a little after six,” the young officer said.
Jeff gave the officer an understanding nod, and then the rest of his family followed him down the road and towards the car.
As they walked, Jeff only looked back at the cornfields once. He saw a number of crows that had perched themselves on top
of the cornstalks to watch all of the chaos — they were the only peaceful living thing in sight.
Once they got to the car, the wind began to rustle through the cornfields. Maybe God was drawing in a deep breath and about
to blow the trumpet. After all, the Bible says the end will come when we least expect it, and this moment with all of the
police and everyone scattered seemed like when they would least expect it.
But Jeff didn’t care. He couldn’t think about it anymore.
So he just unlocked the car for his family. When he got inside he looked at his kids in the rearview mirror. Emily was in
her tattered homecoming dress and Will was wide awake and staring straight ahead. Jeff glanced at Amy and saw that she couldn’t
help but look back at the cornfields. She needed to see what was about to happen.
Jeff twisted the key in the ignition. The clock on the radio lit up with neon blue numbers. It was 6:10. Less than a minute
until the end.
And he was ready for anything at that moment. He was ready to float up towards the sky through the clouds, space, time, and
different dimensions until he was standing in some heavenly realm for an eternity. Or he was ready to find some bacon and
waffles, drink freshly squeezed orange juice, and see what the rest of the day had in store.
So, in the end, the question left is this: How does one define a successful test market anyway?
By nature they’re risky. Most are prone to failure, and even if the test is a success, the person running the test can only
hope that everyone else in the country (or the world in this case) reacts the same way the control group did. And that, of
course, is never guaranteed.
For instance, when Crystal Pepsi was tested, everyone loved it. They thought that having soda pop that was normally colored
a dark brown, but then, somehow, through the miracle of modern science, that same soda pop became see-through, well, that
was just
wonderful
. They enjoyed every sip of the clear Pepsi. They gave the good people at Pepsi two thumbs high in the air. And that gave
Pepsi, who’d spent millions of dollars and months of time on the test market, the confidence to take Crystal Pepsi everywhere.
When it was launched, everyone was pretty sure that colored Pepsi would soon be a thing of the past.
But now it is only Crystal Pepsi that is a distant memory. Most people don’t even remember the doomed soft drink.
So was the Goodland rapture another Crystal Pepsi? Surely not. Because first of all, unlike Crystal Pepsi, which was tested
in Dallas near all sorts of major markets (and therefore gave Pepsi all sorts of false confidence because of media hype),
Goodland is far more isolated and, therefore, the test gave much truer results. Kansas is smack dab in the middle of the country,
perfectly close, yet perfectly far, from everywhere else. And even though the rapture could have gone better, even though
it would have probably been seen as more of a “success” if people were actually raptured, that is just a cynical and pessimistic
way to look at it. Most people thought that the tested rapture still gave God lots of answers and data to look at.