The F-Word (62 page)

Read The F-Word Online

Authors: Jesse Sheidlower

2
. to blunder elaborately;
FUCK UP
.

1946
J. H. Burns
Gallery
317: I snafu’d just like the rest of them.
1948
Military Engineer
(Vol. XL) 64: Too often men seemed not to care if they “snafued.”
1951
R. Leveridge
Walk on Water
179 [refers to WWII]: Maybe the Army Post Office snafued again!
1992
A. Codevilla
Informing Statecraft
327: Soviet factories have been known to snafu in grand style all by themselves.

3
. Originally
Military
. to go wrong, especially to become botched or confused.

1957
W. P. McGivern
Odds Against Tomorrow
175: But when things snafu they start acting like a bunch of crazy women.
1991
L. Niven et al.
Fallen Angels
122: If the targeting system snafued… No, you’re probably right.
1992
Car
(Feb.) 86/1: Munich’s weekend bound traffic snafus and we travel four miles in 40 minutes.
2001
E. H. Rosen
Think Like a Shrink
157: Every move, every encounter has the potential to snafu.

snefu
adjective
[
s
ituation
n
ormal:
e
verything
f
ucked
u
p; variant of
SNAFU
]

Military.
=
SNAFU
adjective
.

1942
in P. Jordan
Tunis Diary
38: SNEFU, as an American officer said at dinner.… Snefu means Situation Normal: Everything F—d Up.
1943
Hartford Courant
(Mar. 6) 6/4: The same man reports that a common expression now at the Capitol when one is asked about the state of affairs is that it is “Snefu.” After considerable probing this turns out to be “situation normal, everything fogged up.”

sportfuck
noun

an act of casual sex. Also: a person regarded as a casual sexual partner.

1990
L. Hutchins
Bi Any Other Name
328: Lesbians who end up doing what some call a “sport fuck” with a man have been in a situation, such as travel, in which a good time with a kindred spirit just happened along.
1991
D. Jenkins
Gotta Play Hurt
43: Even enjoying a sport-fuck occasionally.
1994
J. L. Burke
Dixie City Jam
275: “Wouldn’t you like a little sport fuck on the side?” I opened her car door and fitted my hand tightly around her upper arm.
1996
C. Logan
Hunter’s Moon
55: I gave up
a lot
for him. And not just to be his sport fuck. So yeah, I got him to make it legal.
2005
P. Levine
Solomon Vs. Lord
292: Chet, you’re adorable in your own way, but you’re just a sport fuck and we both know it.

sportfuck
verb

to engage in casual, indiscriminate copulation [with].

1968
Paul Newman in
Playboy
(July) 69: There was sport fucking. There was mercy fucking.
1976
J. Bode
View from Another Closet
91: After we separated and eventually divorced, I went through the typical reactions of sport-fucking, long-term affairs, brief interludes, but always with men.
1987
C. Hiaasen
Double Whammy
xxiv. 235: Lanie gave a shallow laugh. “The sportfucking, he didn’t mind. A different fella each night and he’d never say a word to me.”
1989
S. Chapple & D. Talbot
Burning Desires
124: I still sportfish. I no longer sportfuck.
1991
University professor, age 60: You’d think he’d have some better form of recreation than sportfucking some groupie on the lawn.…
Sportfuck
is a word I remember from Chicago, about 1959.
2003
J. McManus
Positively Fifth Street
143: As far as she was concerned, getting sport-fucked by Tabish before they burked [
sc
. suffocated] Ted made perfect sense.
2005
R. Hoban
Come Dance with Me
xv. 91: I’ve had my share of one-night stands and sport fucking and I don’t know if any of those men who didn’t mean anything to me ran into the Curse of Christabel.
2006
L. Kipnis
Female Thing
4: Feminism Plan A: Strive for empowerment, smash those glass ceilings, sport-fuck like the guys.

starfucker
noun

=
CELEBRITY-FUCKER
. Hence
starfucking.

1970
J. Barnes
Deceivers
72: Those star-fuckers at the other agencies were probably sucking up to Curtis and Lang till hell wouldn’t have it.
1970
J. Grissim
Country Music
259: In the rock and roll fifties they were called star-fuckers. In the acid rock world of the Sixties (and now Seventies) they were called groupies.
1972
Playboy
(Aug.) 70: Groupies and star-fuckers abound and you certainly don’t have to marry them, though a lot of poor fools do.
1973
M. Jagger & K. Richards
Star Star
(song, perf. “Rolling Stones”): Lead guitars and movie stars get their tongue beneath your hood.Yeah! You’re a star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker.
1978
C. Crawford
Mommie Dearest
277: They were the “starfuckers,” people who…would go to any lengths to have their own names associated with anyone famous. These people were not just fans, they had professions and services to sell.
1981
C. Nelson
Picked Bullets Up
181: Because of his notoriety as a bisexual star-fucker.
1990
Nation
(June 4) 796: Wenner,…inveterate starfucker (he once claimed to have started the magazine [
Rolling Stone
] in order to meet John Lennon).
1992
Vanity Fair
(Nov.) 283: Some people might say he’s star-fucking.
1993
New Republic
(Nov. 15) 34: The ’60s turned even serious people into starfuckers.
1998
“M. Manson” & N. Strauss
Marilyn Manson
xvi. 253: Another starfucker and sycophant sucking the life out of me and distracting me from the conversation that I want to have.
2003
L. Block
Small Town
286: That didn’t mean he could abandon her and trot off after some tail-wagging cupcake.… This wasn’t the night for a romp with a starfucker.

STFU
interjection


S
hut
T
he
F
uck
U
p.”

1991
Re: ALL: How to Save alt.evil!!!
on Usenet newsgroup alt.evil (Dec. 29): When you find your brain, let us know. Until then, STFU.
1997
C. Parker
Joy of Cybersex
183:
STFU
Shut the fuck up.
1998
Independent
(Apr. 2) 6: Unfortunately the “STFU-During Performances” sign was too subtle a warning.
2002
E. Jansen
NetLingo
458: STFU “Shut The F*#k Up.”
2006
Bucks County Courier Times
(Jan. 26) 2G: I bet they doodle on their paper and write things like, stfu kerry.

sympathy fuck
noun

=
PITY FUCK
.

1973
J. Harrison
Good Day to Die
68: Nobody wants a sympathy fuck. I would never fuck a girl again if it was a sympathy fuck.
1978
W. Brown
Tragic Magic
97: You’d be surprised how many sympathy fucks I got cause I didn’t have no hand.
1987
C. J. Hribal
American Beauty
38: “So he wants a sympathy fuck.” Mia exhales at the ceiling. “Exactly.”
2001
J. Weiner
Good in Bed
203: “You’re not back together?” “No. It was…”…“Not to worry,” she said, effectively ending my attempts to think of an appropriate euphemism for sympathy fuck.
2007
J. McPhee
Man of no Moon
208: You should know by now that every time I fuck it’s a sympathy fuck.

T

tarfu
noun & adjective
[
t
hings
a
re
r
eally
f
ucked
u
p; suggested by
SNAFU
]

Especially
U.S. Army
. =
SNAFU
.

1942
Time
(Nov. 30) 70: “Snafu,” pronounced “snaffoo”—a good, grumbling Army word, now has a superlative… The new superlative, discovered by correspondents in Britain: “tarfu” (“things are really fouled up”).
1944
E. Pyle
Brave Men
212: The colonel had a coal-black Labrador retriever named Tarfu. That’s one of those mytic military names which you’ll have to get somebody else to explain to you.
ca
1944
in G. M. Valant
Vintage Aircraft Nose Art
295: Tarfu.
1945
in
California Folklore Quarterly
V (1946) 387:
TARFU
. fouled up.
1948
J. G. Cozzens
Guard of Honor
409: On the side of the plane’s black nose, spiritedly sketched in dark red paint, was a cavorting skeleton who danced with a nude woman. Under it, in fancy letters, were the words:
Tarfu Tessie
.
1972
B. Davidson
Cut Off
30: Tarfu, a word coined around the time of the Battle of the Bulge, was…the acronym for Things Are
Really
Fucked Up.
Ibid.
: In a Tarfu like this, nothing surprises me.
2007
R. Atkinson
Day of Battle
78: The action, in Gavin’s assessment was “self-adjusting,” a SAFU, as well as a TARFU and a JAAFU.

throat-fuck
verb

=
MOUTH-FUCK
,
verb
.

1975
N. Jennings
Bondage & Boyflesh
96: The others gathered around to watch their thick-cocked leader throat-fucking the handsome young queen.
1980
S. McCarthy in
Humanist
(Sept./Oct.) 15: The
February
Penthouse
contains an ugly letter from someone who claims to be a sophomore at a large midwestern university and is “into throat-fucking.” He writes of Kathy and how he was “ramming his huge eleven-inch tool down her throat.”
1990
G. Fisher
Journal
(Apr. 14) in
Gary in your Pocket
(1996) 234: Jan sucks Ham near climax (he throat-fucks her)… Description of the face-fuck.
2007
J. Norton
Happy Endings
126: Twenty minutes later you’re back in your hotel room throat-fucking her bareback while praying she’s HIV negative.

tit-fuck
noun

an act of rubbing the penis between a woman’s breasts; F
RENCH FUCK
. Also as
verb
. Also
titty-fuck.

[
1879
Harlequin Prince Cherrytop
4: Breast fuck, best fuck, Cherry’s prick shall ne’er be in it.]
1972
R.A. Wilson
Playboy’s Book of Forbidden Words
285:
Tit fuck
Insertion of the penis between a lady’s breasts.
1975
Ribald
(Sydney, Australia) (Sept. 18) 2: “Down in the valley something stirred.” English-speaking people called it a tit-fuck.
1976
J. Vasco
Three-Hole Girl
20: Lisa’s jugs looked like they’d feel great if she pressed them down around his dick and let him tit-fuck her.
1984
R. Coover in
Playboy
(Jan. 1985) 122: Safely closeted off in his rooms over the town saloon, tit-fucking the hero’s wife.
1986
Penthouse Letters
(Mar.) 89: In the soft version of Annie’s flick, we lose a great tit-fucking scene.
1987
Penthouse Letters
(Oct.) 27: Her scene…ends quite rightly with a tit-fuck.
1991
B. E. Ellis
American Psycho
viii. 79: I tell her I would like to tit-fuck her and then maybe cut her arms off.
1998
Schizo
(#3) [back cover]: I heard Gary Coleman titty-fucked your DAD!
1999
F. Renzulli
Toodle-fucking-oo
(television shooting script) in
Sopranos
(2nd Series) 35: Shaen: (
Ed Sullivan
) And now for you youngsters, with visions of tit-fucking in your heads, the Bing girls! Come on out here.
Pole-dancing resumes
.
2007
S. Seligson
Stacked
72: Have you seen this month’s issue of
Hard Nipple Hotties
? They ran a feature about tit fucking.

tongue fuck
verb

to perform oral sex on (a person, or a body part). Also as
noun
.

1870
Cythera’s Hymnal
in G. Legman
Limerick
(1954) 91: He shyly confessed,/“I like tongue-fucking best.”
1870
Cythera’s Hymnal
in
G. Legman
Limerick
(1954) 91: His whores said he always was poking ’em,/But all he could do/Was to tongue-fuck a few.
1968
L. Harrington
In Drag
98: He felt for sure, Jeff had managed to tongue-fuck him.
1974
R. Price
Wanderers
203: Tokyo had whorehouses where they did Japanese tongue fucks that drove a man crazy.
1979
P. J. Farmer
Image of Beast
89: He…tongue-fucked her while his fingers increased the speed of their in-and-outs into her cunt and anus.
1982
S. Hite
Hite Report on Male Sexuality
728: I also “tongue-fuck” her by shoving my tongue in and out of her hole.
1982
N. Friday
Forbidden Flowers
184: After a while, she takes it out and tongue fucks me and after a while would place her finger in my juicy wet cunt up and down till I had an orgasm.
1991
R. Meltzer
Of Peep Shows & Piano Bars
in
Whore Just Like Rest
(2000) 429: A little overboard on anilingus…, lines like “‘Ooooh,’ she wailed, ‘you’re tongue-fucking my shitter!’”
2005
“Noire”
Candy Licker
ii. 27: I got my first tongue fuck when I was fourteen.… Not one person had prepared me for what it would be like when a man actually opened me up and touched me with his tongue.
2007
H. Hunter
Insatiable
149: I licked the juices off the side of her thighs…before I began to tongue-fuck her.

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