The Gift (21 page)

“You don't have to,” Liz said quietly. “You don't have to do anything the way she did. And you know who you are. You know you're not easy or cheap. You'll finish school and then decide what you want …and you'll do it.”

“He won't let me talk to them again. I'll never be able to talk to my mom again.” She began sobbing again, like a small child, and Liz held her in her arms and hugged her. It was all she could do, just be there for her. It broke her heart to see this wonderful girl go back to those miserable people. She could see now why Tommy wanted to marry her. It was all he could think of doing to help her. Liz wanted
to
just keep her there, and keep her safe from them. But on the other hand, they were her family, and Liz knew that in her own way she missed them. Maribeth always talked about going home after the baby. She may not have known what she should do, but she always wanted to see them.

“He'll be better once you're home,” Liz said, trying to encourage her, but Maribeth only shook her head and blew her nose in Liz's hankie.

“No he won't. He'll be worse. He'll remind me of it all the time, just like he does my aunts. He always makes comments about how they had to get married, and they get all embarrassed. Or at least one of them does. She used to cry all the time. The other one told him off, and told him her husband would beat him up if he ever mentioned it again. And actually, he doesn't say anything about her now.”

“Maybe there's a lesson to be learned,” Liz said, thinking about it. “Maybe you need to make it clear that you won't take it.” But she was a sixteen-year-old girl. How could she stand up to her father? It was just lucky for her she had found the Whittakers. Without them, she'd have been completely alone and having this baby.

Liz helped her get up again after a little while, and made her a cup of tea, while the two men talked quietly and sat in front of the fire. And eventually, they went to the movie anyway, and Maribeth was in better spirits by the time they came back. No one mentioned her parents again, and when they got home, they all went to bed early.

“I feel so sorry for her,” Liz said to John, once they were in bed. They were friendlier again, and they talked more openly about things now. There wasn't the same deafening silence in their bedroom.

“Tommy feels sorry for her too,” he said. “It's a damn shame she got pregnant.” That much was obvious, but Liz was just as upset about her parents.

“I hate to see her go home to them, and yet in a funny way she wants to.”

“They're all she's got. And she's very young. But it won't last. She wants to go to college, and her father can't handle it.”

“He sounds like a real tyrant. But he gets away with it. Maybe if someone talked to him …” Liz said pensively. “She needs a way out, an alternative, so if things don't work out there, she has somewhere else to go to.”

“I don't want her marrying Tommy,” he said firmly. “At least not yet. They're too young, and she's made a big mistake and needs to get over it. It's too much for him to take on now, even though he wants to.”

“I know that,” she snapped at John. Sometimes he still annoyed her. Neither of them wanted Tommy married now, but she wasn't prepared to abandon Maribeth either. She had crossed their path for a reason, and she was a remarkable girl. Liz was not going to turn her back on her, or fail to help her.

“I think you ought to stay out of it. She'll have the baby, and go home to them. If she has a problem, she can always call us. I'm sure Tommy will stay in touch with her. He's crazy about the girl. He's not going to just forget her the minute she leaves here.” Even though the distance between their homes would provide something of a challenge for them to continue their romance.

“I want to talk to them,” Liz said, suddenly looking at him, and he shook his head. “I mean her parents.”

“Don't meddle in their affairs”

“They're not 'their' affairs, they're hers. Those people have left her to solve her own problems at a time when she really needs them. They've left her completely to her own devices. As I see it, they've lost their right to dictate the terms, based on their failure to support her.”

“They may not see it that way.” He smiled, sometimes he loved the way she got involved, and cared so much about everything, and sometimes she drove him crazy. She hadn't cared about anything in a long time, and he was glad in a way that Maribeth had sparked that in her again. She had sparked a lot of things, in all of them. In some ways, he felt fatherly toward her. “Let me know what you decide,” he said, smiling again as she turned off the light.

“Will you come with me if I go to see them?” she asked bluntly. “I want to see them for myself before she goes back there,” Liz said, feeling unusually maternal toward Maribeth. Maybe one day, she might even be her daughter-in-law, but whether she was or not, she was not going to just abandon her to unfeeling parents.

“Actually, I'd like that.” He grinned at her in the dark. “I think I'd enjoy watching you give him a piece of your mind.” He chuckled and she laughed. “Just let me know when you want to go,” he said quietly, and she nodded.

I'll call them tomorrow,” she said thoughtfully, and then she turned on her side and looked at her husband. “Thanks, John.” They were friends again, nothing more. But that was at least something.

Chapter Nine

With much regret, Maribeth gave them notice at the restaurant the Monday after Thanksgiving. She and Liz had talked about it again, and she had agreed that she needed time to prepare properly for her exams, and the baby was due right after Christmas. She was going to leave work on the fifteenth, and the Whittakers wanted her to come and stay with them from then until the baby was born. Liz said she shouldn't be alone, in case something happened. And they assured her that they really wanted her with them.

She was overwhelmed by the kindness they had offered her, and she liked the idea of staying with them. She was getting nervous about the delivery now, and staying with them meant she could do more work with Liz, and maybe even get more credits toward school. Not to mention being closer to Tommy. It seemed like an ideal arrangement, and Liz had convinced John that having her there until the baby came was something special they could do for Tommy.

“And she'll need someone to be with her afterwards,” Liz explained. “It'll be awfully hard for her with the baby gone.” She knew how much pain that would cause her. Having lost her child, she understood only too well what it would cost Maribeth to give up her baby. The agony would be intense, and Liz wanted to be there for her. Without thinking about it, she had come to love the girl, and the bond between them had grown as they worked together. Maribeth had a remarkable mind, and she was tireless in her efforts to improve it. It was something she wanted desperately. It was her only hope for a future.

Everyone at the restaurant was sad that she was moving on. But they understood. She said that she was going back to her family to have the baby but she had never told anyone that she'd never actually been married, or that she wasn't planning to keep the baby. And on her last day there, Julie gave a little shower for her, and everyone brought her little gifts for the baby. There were little booties and a sweater set one of the girls had knitted for her, a pink and blue blanket with little ducks on it, a teddy bear, some toys, a box of diapers from one of the busboys, and Jimmy had bought her a high chair.

And as she looked at all the little things they'd given her, Maribeth was overwhelmed with emotion. The sheer kindness of it tore at her heart, but even more than that the realization that she'd never see her child use any of it brought home to her for the first time what it really meant to give up the baby. The baby was suddenly real to her as it had never been before. It had clothes and socks and hats and diapers and a teddy bear and a high chair. What it didn't have was a daddy and a mommy, and when she got back to her room that afternoon, she called Dr. MacLean and asked what progress he'd made in locating adoptive parents for the baby.

“I've had three couples in mind,” he said cautiously, “but I'm not sure one of them is the right one.” The father had admitted that he had a drinking problem and Avery MacLean was loath to give them a baby. “The second ones just found out that they got pregnant on their own. And the third family may not want to adopt. I haven't talked to them yet. We still have some time.”

“Two weeks, Dr. MacLean …two weeks …” She didn't want to bring the baby home, and then give it away. That would be torture. And she knew she couldn't go home to the Whittakers with a baby. That would be too much of an imposition.

“We'll find someone, Maribeth. I promise. And if not, you can leave the baby at the hospital for a couple of weeks. We'll find the right couple. We don't want to make a mistake, do we?” She agreed with him but the high chair in the corner of her room suddenly seemed ominous. They had all made her promise to call and tell them what sex the baby was, and she had said she would. And knowing that she had lied to all of them made it all the harder to say goodbye, especially to Julie.

“You take care of yourself, you hear!” Julie had admonished her. “I still think you ought to marry Tommy.” Maybe she would after the baby came, they all said after she left. And Dr. MacLean was still wondering the same thing when they hung up. He didn't want to help her give the baby up, only to find that she and Tommy would regret it later. He had thought of discussing it with Liz, to see what she thought about it, if they were really serious about giving the baby up, but he wasn't sure how the young couple would feel about his talking to Tommy's parents. It was a sensitive situation. But he could sense Maribeth's urgency now. It was clear that she wanted some resolution, and he promised her, and himself, that he'd launch a serious search for adoptive parents.

The day after she left the restaurant, Tommy helped her move all her things into Annie's room. She put the baby's things that they'd given her in boxes in the garage, and said she'd send them to the hospital for the adoptive parents. It still made her feel choked up to look at them. It made it all seem much too real.

On Saturday morning, Liz explained that she and John had to go out of town until the next day. He needed to look at some produce markets across the state line, and they wouldn't be back until Sunday. She was faintly uncomfortable about leaving them alone, but she and John had discussed it at length and knew they could be trusted.

Tommy and Maribeth were grateful for the time alone, and had every intention of behaving themselves, and not letting his parents down. And as pregnant as Maribeth was, there were no serious temptations.

On Saturday afternoon, they went Christmas shopping. She bought his mother a small cameo pin, it was expensive for her, but she thought it was very beautiful and looked like something she'd wear, and she bought his father a special pipe for bad weather. And as they wandered through the stores, she looked at some baby things, but she always forced herself to put them back and not to buy them.

“Why don't you buy it something from you? Like a teddy bear, or a little locket or something?” He wondered if doing that might get it out of her system, and it would be something she could send with it to its new life and new parents, but her eyes filled with tears as she shook her head. She didn't want any trace of herself on the child. She might be tempted to look for it then, or look searchingly at every child she saw wearing a locket.

“I have to let go, Tommy. Completely. I can't hold on to it.” A little sob caught in her throat as she said it.

“Some things you can't let go of,” he said, looking at her meaningfully, and she nodded. She didn't want to let go of him, or the baby, but sometimes life made you give up what you loved most. Sometimes there were no compromises or bargains. He knew that too. But he had already lost more than he ever wanted to. And he was not willing to give Maribeth up, or her baby.

They went home with their packages, and she cooked dinner for him. His parents weren't due back till the following afternoon. And it was like being married, fussing over him, and cleaning up the dishes afterwards, and then sitting down to watch television. They watched
Your Show of Shows
, followed by
Hit
Parade.
And as they sat there side by side like young newlyweds, Maribeth looked over at him and giggled, and he pulled her onto his lap and kissed her.

“I feel like I'm already married to you,” he said, loving it, and feeling the baby kick as he held her and rubbed her stomach. They were surprisingly intimate, considering that they had never made love. But it was hard to remember sometimes that they hadn't. She could feel him springing to life then as she sat on his lap, and she kissed him and felt him grow harder. He was after all only sixteen, and almost everything she did made him horny.

“I don't think you're supposed to get excited over four-hundred-pound girls,” she teased, and then got up and walked across the room, rubbing her back, which was achy. They had walked a lot that afternoon, and lately the baby seemed to be a lot lower. There was no doubt that it was going to be born soon, or that it was going to be a very big baby. She was a tall girl, but her hips were narrow, and she had always been thin. Maribeth was beginning to panic every time she thought about giving birth to a baby.

She admitted
it
to him that night, and he felt sorry for her. He just hoped it wouldn't be as bad as they both feared.

“You probably won't even feel it,” he said, handing her a dish of ice cream, which they shared with two spoons.

“I hope not,” she agreed, trying to forget her fears. “What do you want to do tomorrow?”

“Why don't we get the tree, and decorate it before Mom and Dad come home? It might be a nice surprise for them.” She liked the idea, she liked doing things for them, and being part of their family. And that night when she went to bed in Annie's room, Tommy sat next to her for a long time, and then lay beside her on the narrow bed that had been Annie's. “We could sleep in my parents' room, you know. We'd have enough room and they'd never know it.” But they had promised they'd be good, and Maribeth wanted to hold him to it.