Nick’s face became a thundercloud as he turned toward the boy. “Where the hell did you get my music? Did you swipe it out of my guitar case?”
“Umm....no.” Ryan glanced at door almost as if he was deciding whether he needed to start running. “Uhh, Bethany has been playing your CD for my mom. Wasn’t she supposed to have it?”
“Oh.” Nick’s shoulders relaxed as he closed his eyes and nodded. “That’s right. I forgot I told her she could burn a copy. I didn’t realize she went ahead and did it.”
“Well, I liked the songs so much I asked Bethany who the artist was,” Ryan continued. “I was blown away when she told me it was you. I borrowed the CD and played
Sammy’s Smile
for the band, and they loved it, too. We figured out the notes so we could perform it for Dani at the dance. I hope you don’t mind, but I changed it to
Dani’s Smile.
”
“So what you’re telling me is you stole my music?”
“He told the audience
you
wrote it,” Dani said, defending Ryan. “It was amazing. Cindy and Bethany made a rock video of Ryan singing
Dani’s Smile
and posted it on the Internet. You wouldn’t believe how many hits it’s gotten.” She leaned over the gurney’s railing and snagged her purse off the counter. After digging out her smart-phone, she did a search for the video to show them.
Sam was too busy listening to the sweet lyrics to pay much attention to the creative video on the tiny screen. And she didn’t care if the kid stole the song or not. She wanted to hear the other songs that Nick must have spent hours composing—all about her.
Her heart pounded as the truth became clear. That was not the pastime of a man who merely felt a sense of duty toward his child’s mother. He must really, truly be
in love
with her.
“I can see why it’s getting so much attention,” Nick said. “Cindy and Bethany did an awesome job, and you sound great. Much better than my recording.”
“I’m sorry, Mr. R. I should’ve asked before I covered your song, but I was hoping you’d be there to hear it, too.”
“It’s okay. I will be next time.”
There was a sharp knock on the door right before Adam strode in, smiling. “Good news. Dani’s instant strep culture is positive.”
Nick released a relieved breath. “I never thought I’d be happy to hear my kid has an infection.”
“Wait a minute.” Sam held up one hand. “Didn’t you say when Dani got sick three years ago that the reason she had a sore throat was because kids with leukemia have weak immune systems? How do we know that’s not why she caught this bug?”
“We don’t know for sure. I’m still waiting for the results of her blood test. But since her last count was normal only a few weeks ago, chances are this is nothing but a simple strep infection. We’ll know something more definitive in a little while. If her blood work looks good, I’m going to treat this with an antibiotic and do a follow-up count in two weeks.”
“Thank you.” Sam smiled, grateful Adam’s explanation was so optimistic.
“Is there anything I can get you to make your wait easier?” he asked. “A cup of coffee, something to eat?”
“I’ll get my wife whatever she wants,” Nick told him.
Adam glared at him. “Then why don’t you try getting some help, so you can give her what she
needs
for a change?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
Ignoring the question, Adam turned on his heel and strode out of the room.
Nick chased after him, both hands clenched. The door slamming echoed through the exam room and, no doubt, the entire hospital.
Ryan and Dani’s gazes both snapped to Sam.
“Aren’t you gonna stop him, Mom?”
As Sam rose from the chair, Ryan grabbed her forearm. “No, don’t. Mr. R’s just gonna talk to him.”
“How can you be so sure?” Dani asked. “He looked mad enough to pulverize Dr. Chase.”
“Your dad knows your mom will flip out if he hits anyone. That’s the last thing he wants. He just needs Dr. Chase to back off. The jerk has been goading your father all night ‘cause he knows they’re getting back together.”
Sam did a double take at Ryan. “We are?”
“They are?” Dani said almost simultaneously.
Ryan turned to Sam. “You really need to listen to Mr. R’s songs.”
She would have if he’d ever played them for her.
“He might not be good at sayin’ what you want to hear, but he’s real good at putting the words to music.”
Before tonight, she’d blindly chalked Nick’s possessive machismo up to Latino pride, male competition, his need to dominate, or a hundred other reasons—anything but being in love with her. Evidently her friends were all smarter than she was. Actions really did speak louder than words.
~*~
“Chase! I asked you a question, damn it!” Nick stomped down the hall after Dani’s doctor.
Adam stopped and turned, crossing his arms over his chest.
“What’d you mean by that crack about me getting help?” Nick asked. “I’ve always given my wife and daughter everything they need.”
As the words left his mouth, Dani’s and Sam’s tears flashed through his memory. Clearly they’d been missing
something
from him. But he tried to show his wife in a thousand ways how much she meant to him. He didn’t just give her
things
. He listened and tried to help all the time—sometimes even when she didn’t want him to—like butting into her business even though it was the best thing for her.
Had he made Sam feel as if he thought she was incompetent?
“Have you really given her everything?” Adam snorted. “I don’t think Sam would agree.” Evidently she’d been talking to Chase about their marriage.
“What’d she say about me?”
“Why would I violate her trust and tell you?”
“Because you care about her. And you want her to be happy.”
“Yeah, so?” Adam shrugged. “And how does telling you what she said in confidence benefit her?”
“Because you know damn well she still loves me. And she won’t be happy unless I figure out what she needs that I haven’t given her.”
“You already know the answer. She’s told you a hundred times. Your wife divorced you for the same reason most women dump their husbands. You’re too damn worried about giving her things and trying to fix her problems instead of listening to what she needs.”
“That’s what she said?”
“No. That’s what I heard. And if you pull your head out of your ass, you’ll hear it, too.”
There was only one thing his wife had ever begged him for that he’d refused her. All because he was a coward. “You’re talking about the baby she wants, aren’t you?” He didn’t wait for Adam to answer. “Don’t you understand how scared I am another pregnancy will kill her?”
“That’s not simple fear, Nick. No one can promise you Sam won’t develop the same problem if she gets pregnant again, but with the right prenatal care, the odds of her actually dying are relatively low—which makes your terror unreasonable.”
“You’re saying I have a
phobia
?”
“Basically. I think losing your son while dealing with the possibility of your daughter and wife dying, too, left you with post-traumatic stress disorder, and it’s manifesting itself this way. You need professional help if you want to stop letting your fear control you.” Adam pointed toward the ER desk. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to check on Dani’s lab results.”
While Nick watched Adam stride down the hall, he mentally replayed everything the man had said. Maybe Chase was right about him having PTSD. He had let his love for Samantha and his fear render him powerless.
No more
. It was time for him to man up and face his demons.
The words of reassurance Sam had given Dani on the way to the hospital that night reverberated through his mind.
You must know your daddy and I would’ve been sick in your place if we could have
.
She’d spoken the truth. If it were possible, he would gladly lay his life on the line to save their daughter. Despite it going against every fiber of his being to help Sam risk her life, it was a decision he had to let her make. It was her right. He had to find the courage to support her choice—even if it meant seeing a shrink every day to do it. His dentist’s wife, Katherine Grant, had recently retired from a long career as a psychiatrist treating veterans with PTSD. Maybe Nick could talk to her.
“You can relax,” Adam called to him from the ER desk. “Dani’s blood work is consistent with a simple strep infection. But I’ll follow up with further tests next week.”
“Thanks.” Nick slumped against the wall. Dani was safe—for now. However, that didn’t mean the next time the news would be as good.
If his carelessness hadn’t already gotten Sam pregnant tonight, by the year’s end he would. He smiled to himself. And he would damn well enjoy doing it.
~*~
By the time they arrived home, at a little after four a.m., Samantha was mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausted. Even so, she wasn’t about to wait another second to hear the songs Nick had written about her.
The moment Ryan drove away and Nick locked the front door behind them, Sam said, “All right, let’s hear that CD Ryan kept talking about.”
“Yeah,” Dani agreed.
“You know, I didn’t compose those songs for anyone but myself.”
“And yet you gave them to Bethany,” Sam reminded him, hanging her purse on the coat tree.
“I didn’t exactly
give
them to her. She helped herself.” He bent to pet Chewie whose tail thwacked Sam’s leg in his eagerness to greet them.
When the dog turned his attention to Sam, she knelt and gave him a hug. “Did you miss us, good puppy?”
“See?” Nick stared down at her wearing one of his self-satisfied smiles. “I knew you’d love Chewie if you gave him half a chance.”
“You really ought to consider that job as a fortune teller, Nick.”
“I simply want to hear you admit he’s a great dog.” He pointed toward the dining room where the remains of their dinner were still spread over the table. “Look at how well trained he is. He didn’t even touch the leftover steak while we were gone.”
“You really are a good doggie, aren’t you?” Dani patted Chewie.
“Okay, okay.” Smiling, Sam raised her hands in mock surrender. “He’s wonderful, and I was wrong to prejudge him because of a bad experience with dogs as a kid.” And she’d been just as wrong about her ex-husband. She’d allowed scars from her embittered, judgmental aunt to influence her and cloud her perception of him. Tonight, for the first time, she’d seen Nick clearly.
Sure, he was still a bit jealous and inclined to take over, but it was only because he loved her. His hope to reconcile was about more than his pride and duty. He didn’t want her back only for the incredible sex they shared or because being with her was expedient for living with his daughter—although Sam was certain both of those reasons played a part in his desire to reunite.
After witnessing Nick’s fear and angst, seeing the deal he’d negotiated to help her, and hearing about the numerous songs he’d written, she could no longer believe his devotion all these years was rooted in anything but pure, pull-on-her-heartstrings love.
“That was a nice try at changing the subject.” Sam planted her fists on her hips. “Now how about that CD?”
“Yeah, Dad. Are you ashamed of your music?”
“No.” His face turned slightly pink. “It’s a little embarrassing. How would you like me reading your diary?”
“That’s why I don’t have one,” Dani countered.
“You know, Nick, the main problem in our marriage was you never told me how you felt.”
“What do you mean? I said
I love you
all the time.”
“Right. An off-handed ‘
luv ya
’ on your way out the door or when you turned off the light at night. I knew you cared about me from the time I was a little girl, but I was never sure if you were
in love
with me....until tonight, when Ryan spilled the beans about all the songs you’ve written about me.”
“Don’t think I’m not annoyed with him for that.”
“Obviously you don’t have any problem expressing your feelings for me in your music.”
“Look, the sun is going to be up soon. Don’t you think we should get a little sleep?”
“No, way!” Dani stamped her foot. “I want to hear them, too. Right now.”
“You’re sick, and you need—”
“I feel a lot better.” The pain reliever Adam had ordered had evidently reduced the child’s fever and eased her sore throat. “At least play us that
Two A.M. Love Song
. Ryan says that’s the one Mom and I should hear.”
Nick heaved an exasperated huff. “Fine. The CD’s in my guitar case in the family room.”
Dani dashed down the hall and returned to the living room with the jewel case before Sam finished ejecting the romantic mix CD Nick had played during their dinner.
“One song,” Nick said, raising his index finger, “and then we all go to bed.”
“The
Two A.M. Love Song
,” Dani specified.
He placed the disc in the player and selected the track. Sam sank onto the sofa as the soft strains of Nick’s guitar filled the air, followed by his haunting baritone.
Two A.M., alone I’m waiting for my absolute favorite time,
To reminisce about that special night and how I made you mine
You came to me for comfort, untouched and so unsure
I thought I must be dreaming when you whispered, ‘I’m all yours’
Two A.M., two A.M., it’s the hour we made our child
Is the memory just as precious to you, even though it’s been a while?
Soft and sweet, you shared yourself with me and completely stole my heart
Proving we were meant to be together right from the start
“Remember, Danita,” Nick interjected over the music, “your mom was almost eighteen before we slept together.”
“Shhh!” Dani and Sam both glared at him.
He sank next to Sam on the couch and watched her while she continued listening.
At two A.M. I felt my unborn baby moving inside of you