The Guardian of My Soul (Soul's Desire) (13 page)

CHAPTER EIGHT

Alec didn’t rush. He rose from the bed, straightened the covers and winked at me. I glared at him and motioned to the dressing room. He held up his hands in surrender and went without a word.

“Kristen. Let me in!” Mother commanded.

I took a deep breath to calm down and counted to five before I opened the door, trying to behave as naturally as possible.

“Hey...why was your door locked?” Mom asked, looking past me as I stood in front of her so she wouldn’t come inside.

“Why do you think, Mom? I wanted to avoid waking up with you by my side again. You keep depriving me of my beauty sleep.” I put my hand on my hip and stared at her, hoping to high heaven she wouldn’t have the sudden urge to go into my dressing room. If she had come to borrow something, we were in trouble.

She gave a deep sigh. “Have you seen Alec? He’s not in his room.”

“Mom, I’ve just woken up. How could I possibly know where he is? I’m not his keeper. And what do you want with him so early in the morning? Are you waiting for your daily update of my private affairs?” I asked suspiciously.

“Don’t be a grump, Kris. Ryan looked for him and since he couldn’t find him, I came to see you and make sure you two got home.”

“Right. Well, I’m here so you don’t have to worry anymore. Can I go back to bed now?”

She nodded. “I’m going out for a little while. I’ll see you later.”

“You’re going out on a Sunday morning?”

“Yes, I have some business to take care of. There’s a big fashion show coming up next weekend, so I’ll be very busy this week.” She took one last look around the room, as if she could sense something, then spun on her heels and left.

I quickly closed and locked the door, relieved she hadn’t insisted on coming in. I leaned against it with my eyes closed. When I opened them again I found Alec looking at me.

“I’d better go,” he said quietly.

I shook my head and approached him. “I don’t want you to go.” My voice trembled like a blade of grass in the breeze. It was almost a plea. Circling his waist with my arms, I hid my face in his chest.

His body tensed, but unexpected warmth rushed through me when he returned my embrace.

I stroked his back gently until I could feel him relax and we stood like that for a few minutes, neither of us attempting to step away. I snuggled closer still, stretching my arms around him and letting one palm rest over the back pocket of his jeans. My gesture sent shivers through his body and I tilted my head back to look at him.

“Kiss me,” I begged, so low and husky it seemed to reverberate right through him.

His lust-hazed gaze feasted on my flushed face and then it centered on my mouth. His hands slid up my back and cupped my neck underneath my long hair. The gesture made me feel feminine and achy. He lowered his lips to mine for a soft, exquisite kiss which took my breath away. A simple but blissful brush of his mouth against mine was enough to awaken something deep inside me, raw and stunning. When he flicked his tongue against my lips, I parted them to allow him to enter and play with my own.

I felt him release my nape and cup my behind greedily, lifting me to grind his hardness against my softness. His mouth devoured mine with a desperate need which consumed us both. My arms locked around his neck to prevent him from escaping me and he bucked his hips forward, making me answer him. I felt the flower of my femininity blossom. A moan of yearning escaped me when he released my mouth and pressed his lips over the pulse point at my throat, tasting my flesh.

“Miss?” Gilda called, knocking on my door.

We broke apart, this time annoyed we’d been interrupted for the second time.

“Your mother sent me with breakfast,” she said, waiting for an answer.

“I’ll eat downstairs,” I replied, a little louder than intended.

“Yes, dear,” she replied, walking away.

I sat down on the edge of my bed, my fingers tangling in my hair. “We’re playing with fire,” I uttered dryly. “If anyone sees us—”

“I like the heat,” he growled.

“I certainly don’t regret what just happened. In case you were wondering...” I couldn’t help but confess.

“Neither do I.” He assured me and gave me a wicked grin. I melted.

My eyelashes batted as I gave him a small smile in return. “She’ll ask you about last night...”

“I know.”

“Will you tell her?” I worried.

“Hmm, I’m not sure yet. I’ll have to think about it.”

I gaped at him, not pleased with his answer.

“Trust me...” He chuckled and wrapped my hair around his hand, pulling me to him for one hard, deep kiss. “Later.” He pressed his lips against my forehead, then left my room.

It took all my strength to remain calm and not dart after him to bring him back and finish what we started. His charm and even the sound of his voice rendered me powerless. The thought scared me a little as I began to understand how strong I yearned to be in his arms and lose myself in him. The huge emotional wall I’d erected around myself over the years was slowly giving in. Something about him was sneaking through my defensive perimeter, debilitating me. The fear of getting hurt settled in, paralyzing me and making me question my actions. I needed to stay away from him, but I couldn’t. My desperation for him had grown too strong and I could no longer evade it or pretend it didn’t exist.

Megan’s words of encouragement returned to me.
Maybe I should give it a chance. After all, I can’t run away from men for the rest of my life for fear of loss and grief. That is not a life worth living.

Still having my doubts and insecurities, especially related to Mom’s reaction to all of this, I sought refuge in my dressing room. I could still smell his scent and the corners of my mouth inevitably quirked up in a grin. For a moment I contemplated the idea of putting something nice and sexy on, something that would entice Alec, but then I thought better of it. I couldn’t afford to let anyone suspect anything.

Hunger took me downstairs to the kitchen where I indulged myself with the delicacies prepared by Gilda. Once I was done I gave her a brief hug, sorry for snapping at her earlier.

Feeling in the mood for a swim I made my way toward the staircase to go change into a bikini. The noise coming from the gym distracted me and my feet started walking in that direction as if they had a mind of their own, lured by the thought of seeing him again.

Shirtless, Alec hit the punching bag harder with each strike, his gorgeous body covered in sweat. The sight of him almost brought me to my knees and I could hardly resist the temptation to run to him and wrap myself around him, begging him to kiss me again. He was so into what he was doing, it took him a while until he finally noticed me standing by the door.

Hugging the punching bag to stop it from swaying back and forth, he took a deep breath and got his self-control back in the blink of an eye. When he looked at me again the small smile on his hot mouth didn’t make it all the way to his eyes. Suddenly he seemed to be aware of his bare chest and turned away to put his T-shirt back on.
Why does he hide from me? He is magnificent.

Dazed, I stepped forward to stop him, but he was faster than me and quickly dragged it on. “Why do you keep dressing whenever I show up? You can’t be ashamed of your body. You have to know you’re hot.” I teased him.

He hesitated. “I...I’m just being respectful,” he said, but didn’t sound convincing at all.

I gave him a puzzled look, not sure how to interpret his words and actions. “Are you angry?”

“No, why would I be?”

“You were punching that bag like you were trying to rip it apart.”

He threw a towel around his neck. “I was thinking. I didn’t realize how hard I was hitting.”

“You were thinking about what happened this morning?”

“Mostly, yes...”

“You’re having second thoughts,” I said feebly.

He glanced at me, but didn’t answer right away, which only fueled the already smoldering fire of tension. “If you like me so much, why don’t you tell your mom about us?”

I blinked several times, not expecting his question. “Is that what you want me to do? I don’t want to risk her throwing you out, Alec. I’m worried about how she’d react.” I paused. “Look...I fought what I feel for you, but I can’t deny it any longer. Yet, I can’t risk telling her. What if she sends you away? What if she fires your father? I don’t want any of that to happen. You are too important to me.”

“So what’s the plan? You’re a grown woman. I’m a man. What are we going to do? Hide and fool around behind her back like school kids?”

I could tell he was disappointed in me. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to,” I choked out and started for the door, on the verge of crying.

“Kristen!” he called. His breath was ragged, stopping me in my tracks. He put a strong arm around my shoulders, and the other one around my waist, pulling my back against his torso. He buried his head in my neck, kissing me softly.

My heart beat frantically under his forearm and my knees almost failed me.

“Don’t worry. We’ll find a way,” he whispered in my ear.

The blood was hot in my cheeks as his lips planted little butterfly kisses on my jaw line, moving toward my ear. His playful tongue teased my earlobe and I leaned back into him, giving into the feelings he was provoking in me. My entire body began to tingle as he slid one hand beneath my T-shirt and caressed my stomach.

“I should take a shower...” he murmured and released me, turning me around to face him.

I opened my mouth to speak, but I didn’t dare say the words out loud. My head dropped as I stifled a nervous laugh.

“What?” he asked, grabbing my chin and tilting my head back, forcing me to look at him.

“I...I’d like to join you,” I whispered, flushing scarlet.

“Would you, now?” He grinned. There was no mockery in his intense green eyes, no arrogance, only a pure and burning desire which completely disarmed me.

My legs almost gave out under me when I saw him looking at me with pure unadulterated passion. I wanted him, wanted everything he could offer me, even though I had no idea what the future would hold for us.

He stepped back abruptly, his eyes locked on the door and I turned around to see what drew his attention.

Jake entered the gym. Stopping by the entrance, he glanced at us with a dark, sulky face. It took me a moment to realize the sulkiness was directed to Alec.

“Jake? Hey...” I murmured, not sure how to react. “What are you doing here?”

“Hey. Your mom told me you’ve returned home.” He approached me, yet fixing Alec with his cold stare.

“Of course she did.” I cleared my throat. “Um, I was going to call you tomorrow and set up a workout schedule. Since I’m starting work tomorrow, I’ll only have the afternoons free.”

“She’s putting you to work already? I thought you’d take the summer off before getting into business.”

“That was my initial plan, but you know Mom.”

“Um, I’ll leave you to it,” Alec said and retreated quietly.

There goes my chance for a hot shower with him.
I pouted, but quickly placed a smile onto my face when Jake turned to look at me.

“What was he doing here?” His words sounded more like a reproach and I lifted one eyebrow, not pleased with his tone of voice.

“Working out, obviously. What’s the problem?”

“So you’re friends now? I thought you didn’t like the guy.”

“What makes you think we’re friends? And why would that bother you anyway? Jake...you know I don’t like to have to explain myself to others.”

“I was just curious.” He excused himself.

“No, you were being jealous.” I picked my hair up to cool my neck, frustrated. “We talked about this. I told you how I feel about you, so please don’t make things worse. I want us to be friends. I really do. But if you let your jealousy take over you whenever you see a guy around me, it will ultimately affect our friendship.”

“You’re right, I’m sorry. I...I’ll try to...to...” He sighed and stalked out of the room, slamming the door so hard it did not latch.

“Jake!” I called after him, appalled by his erratic outburst. “Damn it!”

“Kristen?” Alec burst inside a few moments later with nothing but a blue bathrobe on. Water dripped from his wet body, forming a little pool beneath him. “What happened? I heard the door slamming,” he said worriedly.

“Jake...he’s in love with me. First he was jealous of Ian, and now he was jealous because he saw me in the same room with you. I don’t know what the hell I’m going to do with him,” I muttered, pacing nervously around the room.

“He’s in love with you?” he asked grumpily. “Then maybe he should stop coming here. I can help you with your workout.”

“Alec...are you being jealous too?” I released a heavy breath, hiding a smile. Alec’s jealousy was different. I liked it.

“Maybe,” he replied, but his facial expression softened and a faint smile appeared, visibly trying to lift my mood.

“Don’t be. You have no reason.” I paused, taking in his appearance. “Um...I’m sorry you couldn’t enjoy your shower. You should go change before anyone sees you...like this...” I licked my lips at the marvelous sight.

He chuckled and stole a kiss from me before leaving to return to his room.

My head tilted sideways as I watched him go. The man had one fine, tight rear end. I couldn’t help but smile.

*  *  *

My every thought was of Alec. I imagined him taking me, kissing me, filling me, thrusting into me over and over. My limbs trembled and dampness formed between my thighs whenever I let my imagination run wild. I had never wanted anyone the way I wanted him. The physical attraction was so powerful it was hard to believe it would ever end. In all my life I had never felt anything so strong, so consuming.
How could my suspicion and disapproval turn to desire so breathtakingly fast?

I didn’t realize my steps were taking me toward his room until I was standing right in front of his door. Despite the danger of getting caught, I couldn’t stop myself from looking for him. Conscious of the fact I was playing with fire, I knocked gently and waited for his answer.

“Yes?”

“It’s me,” I murmured quietly, looking over my shoulder to make sure no one could see me.

“Oh. Come in,” he replied, sounding surprised.

I slipped inside and closed the door behind me.

Sitting on the edge of his bed, Alec clutched a small towel in his hands and rubbed his wet hair vigorously to dry it.
Why do I find this scene so damn sexy?
I willed myself to overlook it.

“Wow...your room is tidier than mine,” I said, looking around quite impressed.

“I like to keep it clean.”

On his desk, a pile of books drew my attention and I instinctively moved forward, curious to see what he was reading. My brows knitted together in confusion when I noticed they were all law-related. I turned to him and caught him studying me, his eyes wide and still.

I gave him a curious, questioning look, but he didn’t say a word. “What’s with these books? Law? Don’t tell me you’re interested...”