The Last Days of Rabbit Hayes (25 page)

‘He’s right, and deep down, you know it,’ he said.

‘Grace can’t fit another soul into that house,’ Molly protested.

‘Maybe I could sell and either buy or rent a two-bed apartment,’ Marjorie suggested.

‘That’s kind, but you have your own problems, Marjorie, and Juliet is ours,’ Grace said.

‘She’s not a problem, Grace.’

‘I didn’t mean it like that, Ma.’

‘My problems are not that big, so I’d like to be considered,’ Marjorie said.

‘She’s coming to us,’ Grace insisted.

‘That has not been decided,’ Davey reminded them.

‘Really, Davey? Well, what do you think?’

‘I think she should come and live with me.’ The words just fell from his mouth. There had been no thought or consideration. He just heard himself say it. Everyone stared at him, as if they were waiting for him to burst out laughing and yell, ‘Joke!’

‘Oh,’ Marjorie said. ‘That’s why you wanted me here – you thought I’d vouch for you.’ She sounded annoyed.

Davey was still surprised by what he’d just said, but he didn’t want to take it back. ‘No. I thought you’d speak for Rabbit.’

‘OK,’ she said. ‘It’s a bullshit idea. Whatever about your ma and da’s ages, Grace’s lack of space and me not being family, you’re a bachelor who lives between two American states and a bus, you’ve never been in a relationship that’s lasted longer than six months, and you haven’t even taken care of a pet, never mind a child.’

‘Couldn’t have put it better myself,’ Grace said.

‘I appreciate your candour and you’re right. I do have homes in New York and Nashville, and I do spend months on a bus. I’ve never been in a relationship that’s lasted more than four months, not six, and I’m not really an animal person. What I am is Juliet’s uncle. I have the money and I can make the time to take care of her.’

‘So you want to take her away from her grandparents, her aunt, uncle, cousins and everything she knows in the wake of her mother’s death?’ Marjorie asked.

‘Yes.’

‘You can’t do that,’ Grace said.

‘I plan on living a long time and I have the room, not just in my house but in my life. I can do this.’ It was as though someone else had possessed him and was speaking through him, because Davey couldn’t believe what he was saying, yet it felt right.
What the hell is going on? What am I saying? Could I really take care of a twelve-year-old girl?

Everyone was silent for a few moments, mostly due to shock: certainly no one appeared to be considering his pitch.

Jack stood up. ‘Juliet belongs here. Grace, if you can work out a way to fit Juliet into your household, you’ll take her. Until then her nan and I will keep her here. It’s not ideal and it’s not what I want for her, but, right now, it’s all we can do.’

He walked out of the room. The meeting was adjourned. Molly followed her husband.

Grace sighed heavily. ‘Well, Da told us.’

Davey stood up. ‘I should take you home,’ he said to Marjorie.

‘I can find my own way.’

‘I brought you here, I’m bringing you home.’

‘OK.’

She said goodbye to Grace and Lenny, who were still sitting at the table, drinking tea.

In the car Marjorie was quick to apologize to Davey. ‘I’m sorry I didn’t support you.’

‘You did what you felt was right for Rabbit.’

‘I did.’

‘And so did I.’

‘At least we can both sleep easy tonight.’

They didn’t speak again until he parked the car outside her apartment.

She hesitated before she got out. ‘You’re a good man.’

‘Honestly, Marjorie, you don’t have to explain.’

‘I wasn’t judging you. Rabbit says I can be a bit judgey, which is ironic because I’m a cheat so who am I to judge?’

‘You are perfectly entitled.’

‘It just seemed to come from nowhere.’

‘It did.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘I hadn’t considered it for one moment until suddenly you were all arguing over who was best to care for her and I thought, Why not me?’

‘Just like that,’ Marjorie said.

‘Just like that.’

‘She’s not a toy. You can’t return her.’

‘I know that.’

‘Do you, Davey?’

‘I want her, Marjorie.’

‘You don’t know what you want. You never have.’

‘Please don’t make this about us.’

‘It’s not about us. It’s about you taking a young girl who’s lost her mother away from the people who love her most.’

‘I know what you’re saying and I hear you, I do, but I can do this and, more importantly, I really want to.’

‘As of five minutes ago.’

‘My da can decree all he wants, but I’ll fight for her.’

‘Oh, I know,’ Marjorie said, ‘but you’d better talk to Rabbit about it.’

‘And if she supports it, will you?’

‘If she supports it, it won’t matter what I think.’

‘It’ll matter to me,’ he said.

‘It’s been a long day, Davey.’ She got out of the car.

He rolled down the window. ‘So sleep on it,’ he said. He waited until she was safely inside her flat before driving off.
Am I insane?
he asked himself on the drive home, but despite the weight of responsibility in raising a teenage girl, Davey Hayes felt lighter than he had in years.

Jay had a pint waiting for him in the pub. The place was quiet, not like back in the day when Sundays were busy. Jay finished his meal. ‘The missus has the kids at her mother’s.’

Davey supped his pint and nodded.

‘Visited Rabbit today,’ Jay went on.

‘Ma said.’

‘I knew she was bad but . . .’ He was shaking his head.

Francie appeared behind Davey and ruffled his hair. ‘Hey, DB, what’s going on?’

Jay got the attention of the girl behind the counter. ‘Can we get another one of these, love, over here?’ He pointed to his pint and then to his brother.

Francie pushed in beside Davey. ‘How’s Rabbit?’ he asked.

‘Shocking,’ Jay said.

‘She’s in good enough form, though,’ Francie said.

‘She was quiet today,’ Jay mused.

‘What was she saying?’ Davey asked.

‘Just talking about the past mostly.’

‘Johnny?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Wonder if he’s waiting for her,’ Francie said, as much to himself as anyone else.

‘Well, if he is he won’t have long to hang about. I’m sorry, DB,’ Jay said, and Davey nodded.

‘She told me you were discussing what to do with Juliet today,’ Jay added.

‘Yeah, we did,’ Davey said.

‘And?’

‘And I want her.’

‘You want her?’ Francie said. He didn’t disguise the shock in his voice.

‘Fuck off.’ Jay started to laugh. ‘Seriously?’

Francie sat back in his chair. He let Jay do the talking and Davey do the answering.

‘I’m serious.’

‘Here’s the thing, DB. Just because you screw teenage girls doesn’t mean you can raise one,’ Jay said.

‘Georgia is twenty-five.’

‘Is this because you’re lonely?’ Jay asked.

‘No.’

‘Because this is not about you.’

‘It’s not that.’

Francie picked up the pint the waitress had placed on the table during Jay’s interrogation.

‘You have no idea how hard it is to raise kids. You’ve never had anyone relying on you,’ Jay said.

‘I know, I know. I’ve never even had a dog . . .’

‘A dog! You’ve never even had a plant. No, strike that. You had a plant, we smoked it and Louis got the shits.’

Kev walked through the door, spotted the lads and made a beeline for Davey. He picked him up from behind and shook him. ‘Howya doin’, DB?’

‘He’s losing his fucking mind, that’s how he’s doing,’ Jay said.

Francie was still unusually quiet.

‘What’s new?’ Kev said. He nodded at the girl behind the bar and pointed to the pints the lads were drinking. She nodded. He gave her the thumbs-up and sat down beside Jay. ‘So what’s he done now?’

‘He wants to take Juliet,’ Jay said.

‘Sorry about Rabbit,’ Kev responded.

‘Thanks.’

‘Now, don’t be a fucking eejit. You can’t even take care of yourself,’ Kev said.

Francie sipped his pint.

Davey was beginning to get the impression the people in his life didn’t think as highly of him as he’d hoped. ‘I’m really trying hard not to be insulted, lads.’

‘Well, you shouldn’t be. You’re a single man who travels most of the year. I work from home and my wife is there most of the time and I swear to God sometimes I just want to kill them, or myself, or all of us.’ Kev sighed. ‘I never would but, Christ, it’s tempting.’

‘Your kids are under the age of five. Juliet’s twelve,’ Davey reminded him.

‘Because tweens and teenagers are such a dream to handle. My Adele is fifteen and her mother found condoms in her room. Fucking condoms!’ Jay’s face reddened. ‘She says she’s minding them for a friend – like we just came down in the last shower – and you know what her mother said to me? “We need to think about putting her on the pill.” She’s
fifteen
!’

‘I didn’t get a feel of a tit over a jumper until I was fifteen,’ Kev said.

Francie laughed.

‘It’s not funny,’ Jay said. ‘Teenage boys are one thing, but a teenage girl . . . She’ll break you, DB.’

Davey had time for only one pint. He left Kev and Jay consoling each other over their kid troubles. Francie walked him to his car.

‘I noticed you were very quiet,’ Davey said.

‘Jay was doing enough talking for both of us.’

‘So you agree I’m being a selfish arsehole.’

‘I think you’re losing your sister, you’re grieving, you’re lonely and everything he said in there is right. You haven’t a clue how hard it is. But I also think you and that kid fit. You caring for Rabbit’s young one seems right to me.’

‘Really?’ Davey hoped his friend wasn’t being sarcastic.

‘Really.’ Francie slapped Davey’s back. ‘Of course you’ll probably fuck it up, but that’s life.’

‘What about my lifestyle?’

‘You’ll change it.’

‘Yeah, I will.’

‘Go on, visit your sister and make your case,’ Francie said.

‘Cheers, Francie.’

It was just after eight thirty and Davey was halfway to the hospice when his phone rang. It was Grace and she was hysterical. ‘The boys have lost Juliet.’

Rabbit was screaming when Molly entered the room. The doctor was trying to calm her, but he was fighting a losing battle.

‘Who the fuck are you?’ she shouted.

‘I’m Enda.’

‘Jacinta!’ Rabbit shouted into the poor man’s face. ‘Jacinta!’

‘Jacinta’s off, but I’m the doctor on call. I’ll be taking care of you tonight.’

‘Get out.’

‘Rabbit.’

‘My name is Mia, I am Mia Hayes. Rabbit’s a stupid fucking name.’

‘I’m sorry. It says “Rabbit” on your chart.’

He was so engaged with the screaming lunatic in the bed he didn’t see Molly step into the room. If Rabbit noticed her mother she didn’t let on. Her IV-fluid drip had slipped from her vein and the fluid had built up in the tissue, causing swelling in her arm. ‘I just want to remove the IV,’ he said, but she wouldn’t let him touch her.

‘What’s all this?’ Molly said, alerting the beleaguered doctor to her presence.

‘I’m sorry . . .’ he said.

‘No need, son. It appears that my daughter is the one acting the arse.’

‘Go away, Ma,’ Rabbit ordered.

‘I’m Enda,’ he said to her mother.

‘Molly.’

‘It’s nice to meet you, Enda.’

‘You too, Molly.’ He leaned over the bed to shake Molly’s outstretched hand.

‘Can the two of you just fuck off?’ Rabbit said emphatically.

‘No, we can’t. Now what’s going on?’ Molly replied.

‘Oh, nothing, Ma. Everything is amazing. I am unbelievably grateful. Top of the fucking world.’

‘You need to calm down, missy.’

‘Don’t talk to me like I’m a fucking child.’

‘Then don’t act like a fucking child.’

Clearly there was a little too much ‘fucking’ going on for Enda because he said, ‘I’ll give you a minute.’

‘Thanks, son.’ Molly smiled at him as he passed her. When he was gone she sat on the side of the bed. ‘If you don’t let him fix that he can’t deliver your meds and you’ll be in screaming agony in no time at all.’

‘I’m already in screaming agony,’ Rabbit said, through gritted teeth.

‘So your defiance makes even less sense.’

Rabbit turned slowly to face the wall. ‘Did you decide who is taking my daughter?’

‘So that’s what this is about,’ Molly said.

‘Just answer the question.’

‘Your da and I are taking her for now.’

A tear slid from Rabbit’s eye onto the sheet below her. ‘Wow, that’s great,’ she said. Her sarcasm and bitterness were impossible to ignore.

‘Say what you have to say, Rabbit.’

‘I’m thrilled she gets to watch me die, then you and me da before she’s shoved off to who knows where.’

‘Grace will take her when she has the room.’

‘Well, that’s everything a dying mother could wish for.’

‘Don’t be so fucking dramatic, Rabbit.’

Rabbit turned to face her mother. ‘“Don’t be so fucking dramatic.” I’m fucking dying, Ma. If I can’t be dramatic now, then when?’

‘You have a point.’ Molly laughed, and after a moment Rabbit laughed too. It wasn’t funny, but they laughed until their bellies ached and then they cried, laughed some more and cried again. When it had taken everything out of Rabbit and they had finally stopped, Molly apologized about Juliet’s short-term future. ‘We’re doing the best we can, love.’

‘I know, Ma. I’m sorry. Yesterday I thought I was OK with leaving her, but today I just want to . . .’

‘Punch a baby?’

‘No.’

‘Kick a pensioner?’

‘No.’

‘Harass some poor doctor?’

‘Yeah.’

‘It’s OK to be angry, Rabbit.’

‘No, it’s not. I don’t have time.’

Her words cut Molly deeply, but she recovered well and lifted the mood. ‘Speaking of angry, Grace hit Lenny in the face with a mug.’

‘She told me.’

‘Of course she did,’ Molly said.

‘Serious black eye all the same.’

‘She did some damage all right.’

‘Poor Lenny. I’ll bet he didn’t see that coming.’

‘It’s OK to be angry, love,’ Molly said again, gently. ‘We’re all angry.’