Authors: Lilian Carmine
“I did no such thing! I don’t ever steal!” I said, smiling.
He chuckled and shook his head. “Yes, you did. You completely stole my heart. But if you prefer, I’m willingly giving it to you, right here, right now. I can’t ever claim it back now, it’s yours, rightfully owned.” He smiled, clasping my hands tight. I’d missed his smiles. I’d missed his laughter. I’d missed his touch. I’d missed him so much. And now I had him back. I had his heart. Rightfully owned.
I leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips. I’d missed his lips too. “Thank you. I will treasure it for ever,” I said, smiling under his mouth. Then I parted the kiss and looked at him. “Do you want to know when I gave you my heart, then?” I inquired teasingly. “That same day at the cemetery. When you smiled at me from the top of your tomb. It was the most breathtaking smile I had ever seen,” I confessed. “You had my heart right there and then.”
“So … love at first sight, huh?” he murmured eerily, gazing into my eyes.
“I don’t believe in that fairytale nonsense,” I mumbled.
“I didn’t either …” he said with a steady gaze “… until I met you.” He leaned in slowly and kissed me deeply, taking my breath away again, while a gust of wind swept over us, making me shiver in his arms. That’s when I remembered we were in the middle of the freaking school grounds, with hundreds of windows in the building facing our way. Anyone could be watching us kissing here!
“Shit! I mean, darn it!” I exclaimed, jumping away from him. “I just remembered we are kind in the middle of the yard here, and you know, I’m kind of half-naked, and so are you, not to mention all the kissing …” I trailed off, embarrassed.
He tossed his head back and laughed, and some leaves twirled around us. I think there was some sort of magic in that laugh of his. Magic seemed to be engraved deep in his core. Then he extended his hand to me, and we walked back to our room, holding hands in silence. I kept praying no one would catch us walking through those dark cold corridors that late at night. It was Saturday, and there was a chance of bumping into students getting back from dates out. Absentmindedly, Tristan kept stroking the back of my hands with his thumb. It was a thing he used to do when he was deep in thought. I wondered what he could be thinking about.
I was still shivering when we got to our room, but as soon as I closed the door, he turned and picked me up, bridal style, walking towards his bed. “What are you doing?” I yelped, surprised.
“There’s no one to see us in here. Seth’s at Tiffany’s, so I’m free to do this now,” he said, smiling. He put me on his bed so carefully, like I was going to break, and lay down by my side, pulling the covers over us and wrapping his arms around me again. “I’ll keep you warm,” he mused softly into my ear.
I giggled and relaxed in his arms. His bed smelled of him. His sheets smelled of him, the T-shirt I was wearing too. Not to mention Tristan holding me tight in his arms. I was overdosing in Tristan’s scent. It was exhilarating! I smiled contently and sighed, feeling the warmth returning to my whole body. In a few seconds I had stopped shivering.
“Better?” he asked softly.
“If I say yes, are you going to send me back to my bed?” I joked.
He chuckled. “If you want to, you can go to your bed, yes.” He shrugged and I frowned in disappointment. “I’m cool sleeping there too. Wherever you are is fine by me,” he said, laughing and making me scoff at his teasing. I almost believed he wanted me out of his bed! Jerk!
He shifted slightly to his side, propping himself up on an elbow while he wrapped his other arm around my waist. We lay in his bed in the dark and in silence, but I could sense his brain working hard beside me. I started to get worried with all this hard thinking he was doing.
“Tris?”
“Yeah?” he replied softly.
“You’re not thinking about another stupid plan to push me away again, are you?” I asked, my heart constricting at the thought. “Do you regret what happened tonight?”
I felt him pull me even closer, tightening his grip on me. “No. I don’t regret it, Joey. How could I regret the best night of my life?” he said quietly, and placed his lips over my forehead. “Don’t worry, Joey, I’m not thinking about any plan … but if I do think of one, I’ll make sure to run it by you first to see if you approve, okay? That way, you’ll be able to veto the stupid ones.” He grinned.
“Okay. Sounds good to me,” I said, burying my face on his chest.
Then I remembered another very important question. “Hum … Tristan?” I called out in a serious voice now.
I felt him tensing up, because I’d called him by his full name. “Yes?” His tone was a little worried.
“What about Caroline?” I asked, dropping the bomb. I might as well know about it now.
He remained in tense silence for a couple of minutes, and then he sighed loudly. I could actually hear the mechanisms of his brain whirring and clicking in the dark, trying to think of the best way to say this to me. “This will sound bad for me, but, I promised you the truth. And the truth is I was only using her, to make you forget about me and move on with your life. I knew that if you thought I was with somebody else, you’d … give up on me.”
I did a little happy dance inside my head. “So … you don’t really have feelings for her?”
“God! No! She’s so shallow and clingy! She’s the opposite of everything I like. She’s the opposite of you.”
A huge smile spread over my face. “And you guys never … ‘
you know
’?” I asked, making air quotes with my fingers. That was the million-dollar question. I had to know for sure. I watched him frowning at me in the dark. The moonlight drifting through the window gave me a good view of his features. I could also see his bright gray eyes clearly, and I was watching intently for his answer.
“Never, what?” he repeated, trying to understand, and then finally he did. “Oh, okay.
‘You know’
– got it! No. We did not! We didn’t do anything,” he stated firmly.
“Because she was saying some pretty wild things about what you guys had been doing … you know …” I told him, still looking directly into his eyes.
I could actually see him blushing in the dark now. He coughed, really embarrassed. “She was? God, no wonder you were that mad at me! Now I understand all the torture you put me through, if you really thought I had … but no! No. I only kissed her properly once, when I knew you were looking at our way, by the lockers. And then we held hands and hung out sometimes, but even that was excruciating to me! She is such a pain in the a—” And then he stopped abruptly, remembering his “no cursing” rule, and continued in more educated terms. “Sorry about that. I meant to say, she was very … annoying.”
I smiled, seeing him blush again. He blushed even more when he cursed by accident. It was the cutest thing. I didn’t say anything after that, and he glanced at me in concern. He clasped his hands around my face, making me look him directly in the eyes.
“I swear to you, Joe. Nothing has ever happened between me and Caroline. Can you see? That I’m telling you the truth?” he asked, anguished. “I’m actually grateful for your ability now, that you can see that I’m telling you the truth!”
“Yeah. I see it,” I said sadly. “I’m sorry about lying to you about that, Tris. I just don’t know how to switch it off, and I didn’t want you to always be afraid to look me in the eyes. It killed me every time you avoided looking at me, for fear I might read what you were feeling. That really sucks. I’m so sorry,” I mumbled, and looked down.
He nudged my chin up with his thumb, making me look at him again. “You don’t have to be sorry for your gift, Joe. It makes you even more special than you already are. I’m the idiotic one that has been lying to you, and didn’t want to get caught. But that’s in the past. I won’t ever be afraid to look at you again, because I’ll always tell you the truth from now on, no matter what, remember?” he said, smiling sincerely.
He leaned in to give me a soft kiss. “I’ll break up with her tomorrow,” he said slowly, tucking a lock of hair behind my ear.
“And do it nicely, because she may be annoying and a pain in the ass, but she’s done nothing to deserve to be treated so badly by you or me, specially not over this stupid plan of yours!” I warned him. No one could ever say I was not a fair person.
“Yes, ma’am,” he said, stroking my hair.
I looked up to see if he was making fun of me, but he just smiled kindly, so I snuggled back against his chest. I suddenly felt tired to death. It had been such an overwhelming night, so emotionally draining. Everything was so intense. I was exhausted.
“Joey?” he asked softly.
“Hmm?”
“I don’t know how is this supposed to be done now, but … you said you love me. And I love you. And after what happened tonight … I know I might not have much time left, but I have to ask you. Will you marry me?”
I choked out loud and turned to look him straight in the eyes, cupping his face gently between my hands.
“Tris, we have a lot of dating to do before we start thinking about marriage, all right? Marriage is for much, much later. Trust me on this,” I said calmly, trying to make him understand.
He sighed loudly. “I’m being old-fashioned again, aren’t I?”
“Yes, very much so. But it’s okay, you’ll get the hang of modernity eventually.”
“Okay,” he said with a cute pout.
“Let’s not talk about serious stuff any more tonight, all right? I’m so tired,” I mumbled, my voice coming out a little muffled.
“Yes, ma’am,” he said again, and kissed the top of my head.
He cradled me into sleep then, passing his fingers through my hair gently and humming a soft lullaby close to my ear. I was asleep before he ended his song.
Chapter Thirty
Secret’s Out
I woke up to the sound of voices in the room. I remained still, lying on my side with my eyes closed, trying to discern the source of the noise. My brain still felt sluggish and blurred. One of the voices in the room was definitely Tiffany’s; I’d know her high-pitched tone anywhere. The other one was … Seth. It sounded like him. My brain began to function in a faster mode, the cotton-candy feeling disappearing like a weak fog.
I also suddenly realized I wasn’t in my bed. This one seemed different somehow, softer. It smelled of Tristan. Then I registered his heavy arm draped around me, his hands enclosing mine, his face leaning behind my neck. I was in his bed. I’d slept in his bed! I remembered the previous night and a smile appeared involuntarily on my lips.
“See? She’s waking up!” Tiffany’s voice was so up-close that I stiffened and opened my eyes, startled.
“Hey, honeydew!” she greeted in a low whisper, trying not to disturb Tristan behind me. “I gather you had a nice evening after all! I was worried about you two all night, cos you left the poker game in such a storming way! But I guess everything worked out fine, right?” she said with a wide grin.
I just stared at her and blinked, trying to gather my thoughts.
“Okay. I think that’s enough, Tiff,” Seth intervened. “You were worried, we came, we checked them out. Everything’s fine. Let’s leave them alone now,” he said, amused, trying to drag her away from the bed.
“But … but … we hardly talked! She didn’t say anything yet! I need to know!” she whined, while being pulled by Seth. Then she wriggled free and ran fast towards me again, her blonde curls bouncing widely with her long steps.
“Hey, Joey, listen,” she whispered urgently, while Seth walked back to retrieve her. “We’re going to have a picnic-lunch-thing at midday, by the big oak tree. We’re waiting for you two, okay?” Seth grabbed her arm and pulled her away softly again. “If you don’t show up, I’m coming to get you! You hear? I’m waiting on you! I need to know ever-y-thing!” she squealed in Seth’s arms.
I raised my head a little, and saw Seth smiling and shaking his head in amusement, with Tiff firmly in his grasp, and then they stepped outside and he closed the door softly behind them. Tiffany was really dying to hear what had happened last night. She couldn’t even wait until I was up, for crying out loud!
I shifted slowly in bed, trying to look at Tristan. He sighed deeply and moved over, releasing me from his hold and lying on his stomach, his face turned to the wall. I could only see his jawline now, but almost nothing of his face. I turned to him and wrapped my arm around his smooth chest. He looked so peaceful sleeping, his breathing deep and slow, making his chest rise and fall in a quiet, steady rhythm. Last night had been such turmoil that I hadn’t had the chance to enjoy the full view that was Tristan’s bare chest. Now I had time enough to appreciate it all. I traced my fingers softly over his chest and down his ribcage, and then shifted sideways to his hips, outlining all his muscles. I wanted to memorize each and every one of them, every curve, every line, every single part of him.
I traced my fingertips softly over his stomach. His breathing rhythm changed when I started playing with the small, soft trail of dark hair that started right below his belly button.
“You keep touching me like that, Joe Gray, and I won’t be held responsible for my actions,” Tristan said quietly, turning his head to face me. He gave me a mischievous, crooked smile, squinting his eyes a little because of the bright light in the room.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.” I blushed and took my hand off of him.
“You didn’t,” he said softly, and then his eyes adjusted to the light in the room and he opened them completely. His gray eyes were so bright, they almost looked like glowing silver rings; the effect was mesmerizing.
“I woke up with Tiffany and Seth bustling around the room and talking to you. At first I thought I was dreaming,” he said, laughing. “But Tiff wouldn’t shut up and then I felt you touching me. I thought it was about time to wake up,” he said, with a playful side smile on his lips.
“Yeah, Tiff woke me up too,” I mumbled, a little unsettled by the way he was looking at me. “Did you … um, sleep well?”
“I think it was the best night of sleep I have ever had,” he said, looking dreamily at the ceiling. Then he glanced down and caught me staring at his chest.
Drooling over
was perhaps more accurate.