The Monkey Wrench Gang (55 page)

“We’re married.”

“So I heard. How is she?”

“Four months pregnant.”

“No shit.” Pause. “Well I’ll be fucked. Bonnie, knocked up. I’ll be screwed, blued and tattooed. I didn’t think it could be done.”

“It happened.”

“What’s she going to do about it?”

“She’s going to become a mother.”

“I’ll be goddamned.” George smiles sadly and happily and foolishly, all at once, like a liberated lion. “You horny old fart. Doc, I want to see her.”

“You will, you will.”

Another pause.

“My name is Fred Goodsell now. I have a whole new ID.” Hayduke’s smile grows wider. “And I got a job too. I start work as a night watchman next week. I’m going to be a regular fucking citizen, Doc, just like you and Seldom and Bonnie. For a while.”

Doc looks back again at the houseboat. The front door is opening. Bonnie stands in the light, trying to see outside. “I’d better get back in there. You wait for us. I want to have a good look at you, and those wounds. So will Bonnie. And Seldom. Don’t go away.”

“Shit, Doc, we’re tired and we’re hungry. We ain’t going
nowheres
tonight.”

Bonnie calls. “Doc … are you out there?”

“Be right down,” he answers. “In a minute.”

Hayduke chuckles. “Good old Doc. Say, that was a nice job you and Seldom did on that bridge.”

“What are you talking about?”

“No? I mean the Glen Canyon bridge.”

“That wasn’t us. We were right here that day. We have witnesses to prove it.” (Thank God.)

“Well I’ll be fucked again,” says Hayduke. Bemused, shaking his head, he ponders this information. “You hear that?” he says to his
masked partner. The partner, who has remounted, nods. “Doc,” says Hayduke, “You better get back to your spouse before she chews your ass off. Only there’s one thing you got to ask me first.”

“What?” Doc chews on the stub of his cigar, which has gone out. “What’s that?”

“Aren’t you going to ask me where my night watchman job is?” Hayduke is grinning at him again.

Now it is Doc’s turn to ponder. Briefly. “No, George, I think I’d rather not know that.”

Hayduke laughs and turns to his partner. “What’d I tell you?” To Doc he says, “You’re right again. But you can guess, can’t you?”

“Oh yes. I can guess.”

“Seldom would like to know.”

“You can tell him yourself.”

“Right, you’re the doctor. Okay, we’ll be waiting for you. Let’s go.” Hayduke turns his giant horse away from Doc, touches it with his heels. The horse lunges forward, snorting with delight. “But don’t keep us waiting too long,” Hayduke yells, fading away.

The two riders vanish down the shadowy lane, loping off toward the pasture. Doc stares after them for a moment, then stumbles down the bank, regains his stability and walks nonchalantly into his floating home, puffing vigorously on a dead cigar. “What’s the game?” he roars.

“Who was out there?” Bonnie asks.

“Nobody. Who’s dealing?”

“This is the last hand,” Greenspan says, shuffling the cards. “You in, Doc?”

“Deal me in.” Doc winks at Bonnie and Seldom. “And don’t forget to cut the fucking deck.”