The No-cry Sleep Solution (60 page)

• Biting

• Red cheeks

• Rejecting the breast or bottle

• Increased need to suck

• Swollen, discolored gums

Some parents report that a slight fever, diarrhea, vomiting, or diaper rash accompany teething, but because these symptoms also may signal an infection or virus, they should always be reported to your doctor.

How to Help Your Baby Feel Better

If you suspect that your baby is teething, the following interventions might relieve her discomfort so that she can relax enough to sleep:

• Give her a clean, cool washcloth to chew on.

• Let her chew on a teething ring that is either room temperature or chilled in the refrigerator (not frozen).

• Frequently and gently pat her chin dry.

• Offer a sip of cold water.

• Rub her gums with a clean, wet finger.

• Use a specially made baby toothbrush to clean the gums.

• Dab petroleum jelly or a gentle salve on her chin in the drool area.

• Breastfeed often, for comfort as well as nutrition.

Analyze Your Success

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The teething pain relief ointments that are available over the counter can be quite potent (put a dab on your lip and you’ll notice a tingly, numbing feeling). So, use these sparingly and only with an OK from your doctor.

Separation Anxiety

As your baby gets older, she will begin to become aware of her

“separateness” from you. She lives in the present, and has a limited sense of time and memory; so when you leave her, she wonders where you go and worries that you may not come back. This is called separation anxiety. According to Dr. Avi Sadeh, in
Sleeping Like a Baby
(Yale University Press, 2001): Separation anxiety is one of the main causes of sleep disorders in early childhood.

The rise in the frequency of sleeping disorders during the first year of life may be linked to the appearance of the separation anxiety that is a normal developmental occurrence at this age.

A change such as the mother’s return to work after maternity leave, a new caretaker, the transition to day care, or any change that signifies separation and a new adaptation is frequently expressed immediately in the form of a significant sleep disorder.

Dr. Sadeh explains that even a temporary separation, such as the mother going to the hospital to give birth to a new sibling or leaving for an overnight event, can have a powerful impact on a baby’s sleep pattern. His research showed that even after the separation, babies woke up more often, cried more often, and spent less time sleeping in general.

Many parents find that as their baby enters the developmental stages of crawling and walking, separation anxiety peaks. This is because your baby learns that she can move away from you—and you from her.

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The No-Cry Sleep Solution

Help for Separation Anxiety

When separation anxiety hits, let her know that you, or someone who cares for her, is always nearby. Here are some ways to send this message to your little one:

• Increase your daytime nurturing by giving Baby more hugs and cuddles.

• Follow a peaceful, consistent routine in the hour before bedtime.

• Keep a large photo of Mommy and Daddy near your baby’s bedside.

• When Baby is awake, don’t sneak away when she’s not looking. Always say good-bye or good night on your way out.

• Show confidence and joy when you leave your baby, not insecurity or fear. Respond quickly to Baby’s nighttime calls or cries, even if it’s just to say, “I’m here and everything’s OK.”

• Help your child develop an attachment to a lovey (see pages 117–119) so that she’ll have something to hug when you’re away.

• During the day, periodically step away from your baby and go into another room while singing or whistling, so that your baby knows that while she can’t see you, you are still there.

Developmental Milestones and Growth Spurts

Commonly, a baby who is learning a new developmental skill awakens in the night with a sudden need to practice it. This is usually a short-lived sleep disruption and tends to go away as soon as the new skill is mastered.

Similarly, your baby might suddenly be eating more, sleeping less, and growing out of his clothes almost before the price tags are