The Other Side of Darkness (37 page)

“I should’ve used the oven mitts,” she says with the water still running. “But we could smell the cookies and got worried they were burning. So I just grabbed the dishtowel, you know, the way you do sometimes? And then my arm hit the oven rack as I was pulling the cookies out.”

“You should’ve heard her scream,” adds Sarah. “I thought her arm fell off.”

“Hello?” calls a female voice from the direction of the garage.

I remember with alarm that I’ve left all the doors open. Anyone could walk in.

“Ruth?” calls the voice. It’s my sister, but I don’t answer.

Sarah, who dashes off to see who’s there, says, “Hi, Aunt Lynette,” and then invites her into the house. When will they learn?

“What’s going on?” demands Lynette when Sarah leads her into the kitchen.

“I burned my arm.” Mary holds it up for her aunt to see.

“Keep it in the water.” I set the ice tray down next to her. “And rub the ice on it too.”

“We’re making nativity cookies.” Sarah shows Lynette a tray of cookies with shapes that look more like blobs than anything.

“Oh …” Lynette looks curiously at me. “What was that in the driveway?”

“Nothing,” I say quickly.

“Looked like the remnants of a Christmas tree to me.”

Mary turns and looks at me now. “
Our
Christmas tree?”

Before I can say anything, Mary dashes out to the living room. Lynette and Sarah follow her, with me trailing behind, a piece of dripping ice in my hand.

“What did you do, Mom?” Mary asks with wide eyes.

I hand her the ice. “Keep that burn cold.”

“She chopped it up,” says Sarah solemnly.

“You
chopped up
your Christmas tree?” Lynette studies me with a perplexed expression.

“It’s a pagan symbol. It has nothing to do with the real Christmas.”

“You really are crazy,” says Lynette. Then she looks around my living room. “Are you guys moving or something?”

“No …”

“Where are all your things? It looks like you’ve stripped everything out of here. And why are their mattresses on the floor?”

“Just because.” Now I’m glaring at her. “Why did you come here, Lynette? What do you want?”

She looks uncomfortably at the girls, and I can tell whatever she has to say, she doesn’t want to say around them.

“You guys go back and turn off the oven and clean up things in there,” I tell them. “Get everything ready for the frosting, okay?” They sort of nod and reluctantly leave.

“Everyone is worried about you, Ruth.” Lynette’s voice is quiet now.

“Everyone?”

“Yes. Your family. Your husband. Your friends.”

“My friends?” I look curiously at her. “Who have you been talking to?”

“Colleen, for one. I called her last night after Rick dropped by.”

“Rick went to your house last night?”

“Yes. He wanted to talk to Jeff and me. He wanted our help.”

“Your help?” I am flabbergasted now. Why would Rick go to Lynette for help with anything?

“He’s frustrated, Ruth. We all are. We don’t understand you. And we’re seriously worried about you.”

“Well, don’t be. I’m perfectly fine. If you want to be worried, you should worry about yourselves. You guys are the ones in danger.”

“What kind of danger?”

“Spiritual danger. Danger of going to hell.”

“Oh …” She just rolls her eyes. “That’s what I was afraid of …”

“What do you mean?”

“It’s this new weird church, isn’t it? Are they brainwashing you?”

I force a little laugh. “Brainwashing me?”

“Yes. Are they filling you full of fear and controlling you?”

“Of course not!”

“Then why are you acting so weird?”

“What makes you think I’m the one who’s acting weird? Has it ever occurred to you that you guys are the ones acting weird and that I’m only serving the Lord and doing his will? I mean, you call yourself a Christian, Lynette, but I don’t see the Lord’s influence in your life.”

“I think we must serve different Lords.”

I firmly nod. “Yes, I’m sure that’s absolutely true.” I want to add that she and Jeff and Rick all serve their lord, the devil, but that will only prolong this unnecessary conversation.

“So it’s the church thing that’s causing you to act so weird?”

I shrug. “Draw your own conclusions. You will anyway.”

“Well, Mom and I thought maybe it was you. I mean, you’ve always been a little strange. And Mom’s been worried that you’re getting more and more like Grandma Clark.”

“Grandma Clark?” I frown at my sister. “What does she have to do with this?”

“She had her hang-ups, Ruth. You know that as well as anyone.”

I refuse to respond to this.

“And you know that Mom’s been seeing a therapist and trying to figure things out—”

“But not a Christian therapist,” I point out. And who knows what strange ideas a nonbeliever could put into my mother’s head?

“I don’t know if she’s a Christian or not, but I do know that she’s helping Mom.”

“Right …” I fold my arms across my chest and wish my sister would leave.

“And Mom admits that she’s blown it with us, Ruth. Particularly with you.”

“She’s never admitted it to me.”

“You don’t give her a chance. You’re always so busy preaching at us, telling us that we’re so evil. How can anyone get through to you?”

“I don’t need to take that from you,” I say, “especially not in my own home.”

“You gave it to me in my own home!”

“That was different. You guys were attacking me. I was just defending myself. You and Mom have always been against me. You’ve all been against me.” I feel tears now, and I really didn’t want to lose it in front of my sister.

“We’re not against you, Ruth. We’re just really worried about you. We think you need help. We want to—”

“The only help I need is from the Lord! He is my helper. He is my deliverance. He is my protector, my rescuer, my—”

“Stop it!” Lynette covers her ears. “You’re making me sick.”

And that’s when I know for sure. “Hearing the Lord’s name is too much for you, isn’t it, Lynette?” I say this victoriously, knowing I have her now.

“You mean hearing the Lord’s name
used in vain?”

I stare in disbelief. “Are you insinuating that I use the Lord’s name in vain?”

“Colleen is the one who made me see it.”

“See what?” I narrow my eyes and wonder how she can be so blind.

“Colleen said that Glenn Pratt and his followers are constantly using the Lord’s name in vain.”

“What are you talking about?” I hold up my hands. “You don’t even make sense.”

“Maybe not to you, but I think Colleen is right. She said people who go around saying ‘The Lord told me to do this …’ or ‘God told me to do that …’ are using God’s name for their own purposes and vanities. That’s using the Lord’s name in vain, Ruth, and I think Colleen nailed it.”

I just shake my head, trying to process what she is saying. “That’s crazy.”

“And that’s the pot calling the kettle black.”

“Get out of my house! Get thee behind me, Satan!”

“You need help, Ruth.” Her expression hardens. “But I can’t make you see it.”

“That’s because you can’t see. You are spiritually blind, Lynette. You don’t see that you’re the one who is corrupt and in need of help.”
I take a step toward her. “In fact, you are in need of deliverance. And if you come to my church, we can pray for you, and we can—”

“No!” She holds her hands out to keep me away from her. “I will
never
come to your church. New Fire? What kind of name is that? I wish God would send some real fire and burn it to the ground!” And then she turns and leaves my house.

“What’s wrong with Aunt Lynette?” asks Sarah, and I realize that the girls have been listening.

“She needs our prayers,” I say in a tired voice. “Aunt Lynette has demons, and she needs help getting them out.” We talk about this in more detail as we frost the nativity cookies. And once the strange-looking cookies are frosted, we go around our house and pray against the demons that were brought here by my sister. We pray to bind them, casting them down to the fiery pits of hell.

As the girls and I get ready for bed, I wonder where Rick is. But I am relieved he is gone. I feel certain he’s not working tonight, and I suspect he’s with a woman. The prayer team made that clear enough. I can only hope he will leave us for good.

Soon the girls are asleep, and I am trying to nod off too. As usual the table lamp is on, and Bonnie and Clyde are in the living room with us, protecting us. All is well, but I still feel uneasy, as if I’m waiting for the next shoe to fall. I look around the living room. The walls are bare, and other than a few large pieces of furniture, the room is quite sparse. No place for demons to hide. And yet … there is something. Maybe this is just the way it is, I tell myself as I try to relax, longing for sleep. Maybe this is simply the best I can do. But why is it never enough? Why am I never good enough? Why can’t I beat this thing? Why am I so afraid?

I
wake up to something nudging my shoulder. I quickly sit up straight, bracing myself, preparing to do warfare, ready to take up my armor, to cast out and to bind. But instead of a demon, I see my husband’s worried face looking down at me. However, this is not a comfort. A demon would be easier to fight.

“We need to talk,” he whispers.

I glance at the girls soundly sleeping. Bonnie and Clyde are awake and alert but not barking. Apparently they’ve gotten used to Rick now, although I’m a little surprised that they never made a sound when he came into the room, never gave me any kind of warning at all. I must remember to train them better.

I quietly get up and follow him out of the living room. He is leading me to the master bedroom, and everything in me is saying,
Don’t go
, but I hate to start an argument. I don’t want to wake the girls or upset them. So I silently pray, preparing myself for the worst as he closes the door behind us. I have a horrible feeling that he plans to kill me. I glance over to the phone on the bedside table, calculating how quickly I could reach it and dial 911.

“Sit down.” He points to the chair on his side of the bed.

Knowing that I will be contaminated by sitting there, that the demon is probably within arm’s length, I sit down anyway. At least I am near the phone. Rick sits across from me on the bed. He still has
on his shipping uniform, as well as an unhappy frown, and he looks strangely old and tired. I think sin does that to people.

“What is it?” I ask, bracing myself.

“You have a problem, Ruth,” he says slowly. “A serious problem.”

I simply stare at him, trying to understand what he’s really saying. “
I
have a serious problem?”

He nods with what seems like relief. “Yes. And I want you to get help.”

“I
have a problem?” I say this again, a little louder this time.

“Look, I don’t want this to turn into a fight. I just want you to know that I think you need professional help.”

“Well, I think
you
need help too, Rick. Spiritual help.”

He nods. “Yeah, I know that already. You think I need deliverance. You think I’m demonized. The girls have told me all that, Ruth. Mary even told me about taking my sweatshirt to your church and how people prayed—”

“We’re doing all we can.”

He holds up his hands like he is surrendering. “Right …”

“So you’ll get help?” I say hopefully. “You’ll let the deliverance team pray—”

“No. That’s not the answer.”

“What
is
the answer?”

He takes a deep breath. “For you to get help.”

I take an aggravated breath. “You already said that, Rick. And I told you that I’m not the one who needs help. You are!”

“This is my plan, Ruth.”

“You
have a plan?”

“Yes. If you don’t agree to get help, I will take the girls away from you.”

“You will
what?”

“You’re going to wake them up.”

I try to calm myself. I remind myself that this is a spiritual war. I’m not fighting flesh and blood but demons and powers and principalities. I brace myself for the battle. “How exactly did you make this plan, Rick?”

“I met with your family. They’re concerned too. We think you’ve been brainwashed by this cult church that you’ve—”

“New Fire is
not
a cult church,” I tell him.

“We think it is, Ruth. And both Dennis and Colleen told me that Glenn Pratt is a wolf in sheep’s clothes.”

I actually laugh. “Of course, they would say—”

“He’s had affairs with quite a few women in the congregation—”

“Lies, lies, lies!” I shake my head. “Why does it not surprise me?”

“New Fire is dangerous, Ruth. Those people spend more time with Satan than Christ.”

“How would you know?”

“I was there; I saw it for myself. That place is way off base, and it’s like you’ve been trapped—”

“I’m trapped?” I force a laugh. “Why don’t you look at yourself, Rick? You’re the one who’s trapped—spiritually trapped. You belong to the devil, and unless you get deliverance, you will go to hell. Do you understand that?”

He sighs. “Maybe we’ve said enough for tonight. I just want you to know where I stand. I have to draw the line. I want to give you a chance to get the help you need. But if you can’t—”

“I’m not the one who needs help,” I say again. “You are so spiritually blind that you can’t even see that. You don’t know that it’s only the girls and me who are holding this home together. If it
weren’t for our constant and vigilant spiritual warfare, who knows where we’d be now?”

He holds up his hands, palms toward me, and for a moment I think he might strangle me. I quickly stand up, stepping away from him. “Look,” he says, “I’m exhausted, Ruth. I need to get some sleep.”

“Yes. I’m sure you
are
exhausted. Why wouldn’t you be exhausted?”

He stares at me. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means that I
know
, Rick.” I lean over him as he sits on the edge of the bed. “I know you’ve been pretending to be working overtime, but I
know
what you’ve been up to.”