“It could be anyone, Alek. Why do you insist on trying to hurt me with these accusations?” she answers, stalling. This isn’t good.
“Because you’re the wife of a man who would use his son to deliver illegal weapons into the hands of his enemies. Oh, and I almost forgot. He made me do it to keep the peace with his friends. Some of which, I just found out you were sleeping with, yes.”
“I took you and your sister away, did I not?”
“You did. And then, for the past five years, you tried to mold us into perfect visions of what Katerina Dostovsky wanted us to be. No matter how much dignity we lost, or how many friends we sacrificed. As long as we did what you wanted, it never mattered whether we were happy or not.”
“You have a perfect life,” she reminds me. “You have fame, fortune, whores: what more do you want, Alek?”
“I don’t have love, Mother. I’m really not sure I’ve ever experienced it before.”
“That girl makes you say these terrible things to me,” she says. I scoff and shake my head. “I warned you about getting involved with an American.”
I can’t believe she’s blaming our fucked up situation on Erin
. “That’s right. I’m falling for her. And you hate that, because you never got it right, even with a piece of scum like Sebastian.” My face whips to the right before I barely finish speaking the Phoenix’s real name. Mother’s slap still doesn’t sting as much as what I just discovered about her affair.
“Look at what you made me do,” she gasps as she rubs my face. I move my head away from her hands. “I don’t want to lose you too. I forbid this relationship to go any further, Aleksandr. You’ll return to Nadya, and apologize. I hear she still pines over you like a sappy puppy. Outsiders, like your designer girl, don’t belong in our world. You know this. I warned you about getting close to Erin Angelo. Now look at what it’s doing to you…to us.”
I think of a way to trick her. “Maybe you’re right. I’ll consider taking Nadya back if you call off your real estate vipers.” Mother falls for the bait. I can see the spark of hope gleaming in her eyes after I finish my statement.
“Fine.” She picks up her glass and swallows more wine. Sitting it down, she proceeds to straighten out her dress.
“You admit to what I asked about earlier, then?” I get a blank look in return, the one I always get when Mother’s done explaining her unstable ways. “I don’t understand. You already own half of the storefronts on that block. Why do you need Black Butterfly’s building?”
“I only wanted to frighten them a tad. Make them more productive. And it worked, didn’t it?” She dabs at her eyes. I don’t see where any tears were ever in them. Glancing back at me, she scoffs a laugh. “No worries. I wasn’t really going to shut anything down, Alek. Have you told her the real reason you chose their group?”
I keep silent. She needs a way to redirect her guilt onto someone else. Only a handful of design houses volunteered to work with the scandalous Dostovskys. The only decent group willing to consider outfitting our show was Black Butterfly. “She doesn’t need to know that.”
“See, we’re not so different, darling.”
An unbelievable surge of adrenaline races through me. I need to leave before wind up destroying everything in her perfectly decorated living room. “I hope, no, I pray I don’t treat my children this way. I’d never be able to look in a mirror.” Shaking my head, I turn and head toward the front door.
“
We’re not finished yet. Don’t you dare walk away after saying something like that, Aleksandr. Did you hear me? Walk out that door, and I swear, I’ll make sure you never treat me this way again,” she warns.
I turn around
, facing her. “You’d honestly hurt your son over this? The light of your wealthy eye?” I ask in a sarcastic voice.
“
No, but I would condemn the woman he loves in order to save his life,” she answers in flat voice, her gray eyes cold and hard as she stares in my face. I turn around and walk out the door, knowing I’ll regret my words, my actions.
Mother never makes empty threats.
Not even with her own children.
Erin
Alek stands in my doorway, the rain drizzling on his head. I’ve been worried because he hasn’t stopped by in almost three days. And his phone conversations have been too brief for me to figure out his real feelings.
The slick hair covering his forehead highlights the dark stubble on his face. I don’t think he has shaved since the pre-show a few nights ago. That was the night I discovered my life coach was a mob boss who used Alek and Nikolai to smuggle illegal correspondence between his group members.
Wow! What a mouthful, right?
“I apologize for not calling in advance, but I don’t have anywhere left to go,” he explains. The sight of him standing there looking that way kills me inside.
“Come in out of the rain,” I say, taking his hand and leading him into my small kitchen. He takes a seat at my glass dining table that takes up most of the space in the area.
I grab some towels and help him dry off. Since we’ve travelled back and forth between his apartment and mine, I have a few shirts of his. I place his wet clothes in the laundry room and wait for him to say something. He’s so quiet. It’s almost like he’s broken. I’ve never seen this side of him before. Alek, the young maestro who can take on the world with the passion he shows through his musical ventures has suddenly left the building. I take a seat across from him.
“Where’s my sister?” he asks.
“Who knows. She’s out somewhere doing her thing. Lately she spends most nights at her place,” I answer. He glances over at me and gives me a weak smile. My heart speeds up the tiniest bit.
“I know she’s dating Martuccio, Erin,” he announces.
I wince. “Don’t kill Luca. I do believe for the first time in his life he actually cares about someone,” I explain and wait for the explosion, for something, anything that’ll make me feel better about the person who sits across from me, the man who’s like an empty shell.
“I hardly have enough energy left to breathe, let alone murder someone, Erin. I’ll kill your boss some other time.” I can’t stand it any longer. Rising to my feet, I walk over to him and take his hands. I’m stepping outside of my comfort zone again. Last time I tried this it blew up in my face.
But this time, Alek needs me to do something brave. I can tell even if he can’t see what’s going on. I
position myself on the floor between his legs. Both my good and bad girl sides got together and decided it was time to work this thing out. This is the idea they came up with. And I’m willing to try it out. I’ll do anything to bring my Alek back.
I lift up off the kitchen floor and place my arms around his neck, embracing him. In
return, he puts his arms around me and releases a long sigh. The world sits on his shoulders, and I want him to understand he doesn’t have to worry all by himself anymore. Moving back, I glance into his eyes, the ones staring at me in that penetrating way he does so well.
I place my lips on his, kissing him first this time. Right away, he groans and parts his lips, sucking and nibbling on my bottom one. The motion shoots straight through my body, and my stomach clenches. And even though my panties are already wet with desire, there’s more to the way he affects me this time. It’s kind of like my lungs have collapsed, and the room spins the tiniest bit. I know exactly what’s happening.
This arrangement of physical pleasure has now crossed over to something deeper. How long has it been since I’ve felt him inside me? Too fucking long. He eases his hands up under my night shirt, stopping at my breasts, and fingers my nipples.
A little squeak escapes my lips. The sound excites Alek, and a hint of his old self fires to life. He stands up and pulls me to my feet.
Without further hesitation, he returns to kissing me. This time, his lips demand more from me as he presses even harder, deepening our kiss. My ass collides with the countertop behind me, the one beside the refrigerator. I unfasten his belt and work my hand into his jeans. His hard cock shudders under my touch and he jumps the tiniest bit as I begin to massage it.
“I want you. Right here, right now, Erin Angelo,” he whispers against my neck.
Next thing I know, he lifts me up on the countertop. I’m so hot and turned on right now, that I don’t even think about the chill hitting my ass. I wrap my legs around him, pulling him closer to me, because suddenly he feels so far away, even though he’s standing right here with me.
“I’m going to fuck you fast and hard, Erin. I need you like that right now. His face is completely flushed as he lowers his jeans and prepares to enter me. At the start of our arrangement weeks ago, we both agreed that I would begin taking birth control pills. Neither of us is crazy about rubber sex, so I agreed. Now, I think I’m happier than ever about my decision.
“Tell me how much you need me, right now,” he says in a husky voice, his wild eyes boring into mine.
“I need you, Alek. I want to feel all of you inside me,” I manage to say through my gasps. I reach around and grab his buttocks. He eases my hands back.
“Not yet, eager little bird. Tell me who it belongs to.” His hand slips under my night shirt, moving my panties back, and then he eases two fingers inside me. I’m so damn wet and horny, I’ll say anything he needs me to say. “I want to hear you say my name.”
“Holy hell!” I gasp out. “My pussy belongs to you, Aleksandr Dostovsky, and if you don’t fuck me now, then I’m going to strangle your ass!” I get a slight, but wicked grin after that statement.
“As you wish, Signorina Angelo.” Lifting my ass off the counter with one hand, he removes my panties in one slick move, opens my legs wide, and then thrusts his cock inside me, penetrating me all the way up to my womb.
There’s no music, no audience. The only sounds come from the two of us moaning and groaning as we bring each other to orgasms at the same time. “Holy moly that was incredible,” I whisper in his ear, my arms wrapped around his neck.
Lifting his head, he says, “Good, because I need one more round.” Next thing I know, he’s inserting his cock back into his pants. And then he lifts me up, tosses me over his shoulder and carries me off to my bedroom where we have a couple more rounds before we fall out from exhaustion.
After round three is finished, Alek rests on top of me. He glances in my eyes, his half-lidded ones
full of questions. “What’s wrong?” I ask.
“Let me in, Erin. I’m not only talking about in a sexual way. I want to know what’s inside here. I need to know,” he says and places a hand over my heart. “Can’t you see that what we have isn’t normal? I truly believe something divine has stepped in here.” He fingers my necklace, the butterfly that once belonged to Jada. I haven’t taken it off since we returned from our mini getaway a couple weeks ago.
“Tell me what happened to your sister. Let me help you carry that load you work so hard to handle on your own,” he pleads. His eyes storm with concern. I close mine and inhale deeply.
Time to let go, girlfriend.
Breathe
, Erin. Let him help you live again.
“Six years ago, I was offered a scholarship to attend Julliard, a big-time music school in New York. Both my sister and I grew up around music with my mom being a singer in the church choir. Drawing and singing, I always knew one of them was going to be my big deal. Jada did too. She never understood why I decided on a design degree.”
“I agree with her,” Alek says, giving me a hint of a smile.
“I know you do,” I remind him.
“Continue, please,” he gently urges.
“To qualify for the art center’s music scholarship, I had to audition. Easy enough, right? Well, not for me. I was terrified. I even broke out in hives the night before my audition. So, Jada agreed to go in my place. We were only thirteen months apart in age. Most people thought we were twins. Hell, I thought so too, sometimes. So she took my I.D. and pretended to be me. Jada hitched a ride to the DPAC, the performing arts center in our town. She could do that because she was a senior and was able to leave school early.
“She sang for me. I was leaving my second period class when the phone rang. I was scared to answer it. But as soon as I heard the excitement in her voice, I started crying happy tears. Everything went to the shits after that phone call, though. Her ride left her there. So she had to call my dad. Mom’s car was in the shop getting inspected. And my dad was in a high-profile meeting with some government officials. He worked for the C.I.A. My mom said he was mad as hell when he called her that day after he heard about Jada skipping school.”
The tightness in my chest begins. I let out a long sigh. “It’s alright, Jaybird. I’m here. Keep going,” Alek says, massaging the back of my neck.
“There’s not really much else to say. It should’ve been me, Alek. I was supposed to be the one in that car, not Jada. Neither one of them would’ve been in that situation if I wasn’t such a little chicken shit. I was going to sing
the Rose
. Yeah, yeah, it’s old as everything, but it’s a beautiful song.”
The tears don’t go easy on me this time. The more I try to keep them away, the harder they fight to be free of my restraints. I choke on my sobs. Alek moves over to me, pulling me in his arms. It’s all I need to lose the fragments of control I have left.