The Pursuit of Jesse (13 page)

“Now you’re talking,” Jesse said.

The motor on the battery-operated tool sounded briefly. “We got it!” Zach exclaimed.

“Good job. Keep going.”

“Hello, there.” Sarah’s voice sounded from the front door. “How’s it going?”

Jesse glanced up above the counter. She was taking off her coat and boots, looking as if she might stay awhile. This was the first time he’d seen her since Duffy’s and he wasn’t exactly sure how to be around her.

Her boss. You lackey.
Seemed best, all things considered, to keep things on that level.

“Things are clipping along,” he answered. “Your bathrooms are finished, so the kitchen is next. First thing we have to do is to remove the old cabinets and counters.”

She walked into the kitchen, and he immediately backed up, putting distance between them. Bending over, she glanced inside the cabinets. “What are you two doing in there?”

“Helping,” Zach said.

“Jesse needed the screws out of these cabinets, so he can install the new ones.”

She straightened and smiled. “Looks like the boys have come in handy.”

“You know it.” Jesse chuckled. “I’d be a little on the contorted side trying to fit inside there to unscrew the cabinets from the wall. They’re doing a good job.”

In truth, they were barely strong enough to hold up the cordless screwdriver, and she knew it. But it was nice of them to help, and Jesse, surprisingly, enjoyed their company.

“So what’s next after you dismantle the kitchen cabinets and counters?”

“I’ll put in the floor.” He nodded toward the wide-width wood planks stacked against the wall in the living room. “Once that’s in, then I can install the new cupboards and counter.”

Sarah’s expression turned soft. “Once you finish with the kitchen, the house will start looking like a home.”

“Kitchens are the focal point for a lot of people.” Jesse looked away. The moment turned awkward, and he wracked his brain for something to say. “How—”

“I—”

They both talked at the same time.

“You go first,” she said.

“I was wondering if you wanted to salvage the old kitchen counter and cabinets. They’re outdated, but
they’re still in good shape. They’d make for a nice workbench and storage.”

“Where would you suggest putting them?”

“Well, since you don’t have a garage, in the basement. I’ll show you.” He headed toward the stairs just off the side door into the kitchen. “Boys, we’ll be right back. You guys keep at it, okay?”

“Okay,” they both said in unison.

He flipped on the light at the top of the basement steps. It flickered for a moment before holding steady. “That’s a bad ballast. I can replace this one, but there’s more rewiring that needs to be done here and there, and I don’t do electricity.” He could, in reality, manage it, but it’d likely take him twice as long as an experienced electrician. “I recommend hiring someone to do the rewiring.”

“Do you know anyone?”

“No, but Garrett might.”

She followed him down the steps and he crossed to the far corner.

“I didn’t know you’d cleaned out the cellar,” she said. The basement had been filled with junk, broken screens, old dehumidifiers, discarded small appliances and the like.

“On the first day,” he said. “Thought I’d better take advantage of the Dumpster.”

“No wonder things seemed to be going a little slow initially. Why didn’t you say something?”

He only slanted his head at her. They hadn’t exactly been on cordial terms back then.

“Never mind,” she said, seeming to remember. “Thank you for clearing the mess out.”

“Not a big deal.” He pointed to the corner. “The
counter and cabinets would fit right here. Makes for a good work area.”

“I was only planning on using the basement for storage, so that’ll work.”

“I’ll make it happen.” He turned toward the stairs.

“Jesse?”

He paused, but he wasn’t sure he wanted to look at her. In fact, he was sure he didn’t.

“About the other night,” she said. “At Duffy’s. I have something I need to say.”

“Y
OU DON’T NEED TO SAY
anything, Sarah.” He shrugged. “You were protecting Brian. You’re his mom. It’s your job.”

“I need to explain why I’ve been so…”

“Antagonistic toward me?” He cocked his head. “That’s okay. I figured I’d get that a lot just getting out of prison and all.”

“I guess that was part of it.” She lightly touched his arm, holding him back. “Not knowing what you’d done… I have to admit, I got on the internet and tried to find out why you’d been sent to prison. But I couldn’t find any—”

He laughed as he imagined her searching for him online. “That’s because my first name is really James. Jesse is a nickname. Been stuck with it ever since a game of cops and robbers when I was about Brian’s age. And, yes, in case you’re wondering…I was a robber, not a cop. Get it? Jesse James?”

“Well, that explains it. I couldn’t find anything, so all kinds of horrific crimes went through my head. I imagined the worst.”

“Sarah, it’s okay.”

“No. It’s not. I—”

The light flickered again, and then it went completely out. The narrow, belowground windows were
caked with dirt and very little light filtered down from upstairs.

Jesse wasn’t sure if it was his imagination or not, but it seemed as if Sarah had stepped closer to him. “You okay?” he whispered, reaching out to steady her.

“I’m fine.” She leaned into his touch, belying her words. Something was happening here between them and that was definitely not his imagination. “I just don’t like… This cellar is a little creepy, isn’t it?”

“It’s old, but it’d sure come in handy if a tornado ever hit the island.”

The light flickered on.

“Uncle Jesse!” Zach called from upstairs.

“Coming!” Jesse turned, thankful for the reprieve.

“But I wanted to apologize,” Sarah said quickly.

“Don’t sweat it.” Feeling as if a fire was at his heels, Jesse took the steps two at a time. “Gotta get back to work, or there’ll be hell to pay with boss lady.”

Sarah followed. When they reached the kitchen, the boys were taking large gulps from a couple cans of sodas.

“What’s up?” Jesse asked.

“I can’t do any more,” Zach said, shaking his head.

“Me neither,” Brian added. “My arms are shot.”

“Well, you guys have been working pretty hard since you got out of school. I’ll do the rest.”

“Let’s go back to my house,” Zach said. “And get something to eat.”

“I’m starving.”

“Leave room for dinner,” Sarah cautioned. “Be home by six, okay?”

Within minutes, the boys were dashing out the door, leaving Jesse alone with Sarah. Again. Attempting to
avoid her, he slid halfway into the lower cabinets and was working to remove the rest of the screws holding the cabinets to the wall.

“Jesse, can I talk—”

“Now’s not a good time, Sarah. I’d like—”

“I’m not going away. I need to say something. Please.”

Jesse took his finger off the power button on the battery-operated screwdriver. There was something in her voice that didn’t seem right. “Okay, fine.” He slid out of the cupboard to face her and leaned back against the counter. “We might as well get this over with. Shoot.”

“I have a confession to make.”

“Oh, no.”
Hell, no!
“I don’t take confessions—”

“I need you to listen.”

“Sarah—”

“There was a time in my life when what happened to you that night in Milwaukee could’ve happened to me.”

That stopped him. What she’d just admitted was about as honest as confessions got.

“I could’ve been driving a truck that caused a man to be paralyzed.” She had a hard time holding his gaze. “There was a time in my life when I could’ve hurt, or killed, someone. I’m not very proud of it.”

“Don’t we all have some history we’d rather forget?”

“Not like this.” She shook her head. “There are some things I did back then that make the hair stand up on the back of my neck.”

“Sarah, you don’t need to tell me—”

“Yes, I do.” She paused. “But maybe if you understand… I grew up in a small town in Indiana. I hit my
teenage years and went just about out of my mind with boredom. I couldn’t get out of Indiana fast enough after I finished high school. Ended up in Florida. Started working for the wedding planner of Miami’s wealthiest. I couldn’t wait to start living. And, trust me, I crammed a lot of living into a few short years. Fell in with a bad crowd. Started partying, and…well, let’s say that I had more than the average person’s wild oats to sow and I sowed them but good.” Out of the blue, tears welled in her eyes. “Dipped my toes into a little more than top-shelf tequila.”

“Drugs?”

“Mostly cocaine. Some ecstasy. The truth is, if there was a drug available, I pretty much did it. If there was a man available, I did him, too. As long as he was fun, footloose and fancy-free. The badder the bad boy, the better.”

Wow. This, I never expected. Not from the likes of Sarah.
“But you broke the cycle, right?”

“If you can call hitting rock bottom breaking the cycle, then yeah. The truth is…I’m lucky to be alive.”

“What happened?”

“I woke up one morning in a stranger’s bed. I didn’t know who he was, how I’d met him, how I’d gotten on his yacht. We were in the Bahamas. I’d lost two days of my life drugged up on God knows what.”

“Yeah, that’s a doozy. I’ve done a lot of crazy things, but I can honestly say I knew every single bed I ever woke up in.”

“I’m not proud of it. Safe to say, I’m ashamed of it, actually. It was the lowest point in my life, but it was also a turning point.” She sighed and seemed to be gathering herself. “Everything was different for me after that day. I knew my life had to change.
I
had to
change. I went straight. At least I did for a few weeks. Just when I slipped back into one more binge, the real turning point hit me.”

“You found out you were pregnant. With Brian.”

Sarah nodded. “Knowing I was carrying a baby. Knowing I was going to be responsible for a little one made me do the right thing.” She held Jesse’s gaze. “So that was it. The end of the parties. No more clubs. No more of my old friends. I quit my job, moved into a new apartment to get away from that old crowd and started up my own wedding-planning business. Things were actually going okay.”

“Who’s the father?” As he held her gaze, he could see the shame virtually sweep through her.

“See that’s the thing. I don’t know,” she whispered. “At the time, I narrowed it down to one of three men. One was married at the time. One wouldn’t take my calls. But the other man…Bobby…asked me to marry him.”

“Were you straight with him? Did you tell him you didn’t know who the father was?”

“No.” She couldn’t hold his gaze and looked away. “I was scared. Didn’t have any savings. Didn’t know how I could support a baby all on my own. I convinced myself that I wasn’t really lying because I really didn’t know the truth.”

“Did you marry him?”

She shook her head. “Got engaged to him, though. Went through all the plans. For a while, the prospect of a wedding seemed to help him clean up, too, so that was another reason how I justified keeping the truth from him. I would’ve gone through with it, I think.”

“But?”

“He OD’d not long after Brian was born.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. At least not for me. Me getting away from Bobby, from that lifestyle, was very likely the best thing for me and Brian. Bobby’s mother, though, was in a lot of pain over losing her only son. She blamed me for his death and threatened to take Brian away. Like a pit bull, she just wouldn’t let go. The court ordered a blood test and it turned out Bobby wasn’t the father.”

Turning her justifications into outright lies.

“A part of me has always felt responsible for Bobby’s death.”

“Sounds to me like the writing was on the wall for that man even before he met you, Sarah.”

“Maybe. Maybe not. Either way, I left Florida and never looked back. Since then, it’s been nothing but the straight and narrow for me. Almost ten years.”

He held silent, absorbing what she was saying.

“So now you know. You’re the only one who knows every sordid detail of my past.”

“You’ve never told anyone?”

“Missy knows bits and pieces. That’s all.”

It’d taken a lot for her to admit this to him, and he wished he could say that she looked relieved. She didn’t.

“So…I guess what I’m trying to say is that…I’m sorry. I know it’s not fair, but you…reminded me of my old life. Of all the mistakes I’d made.”

She was so serious. Too serious. Everyone made mistakes. Hers were a long time in the past, way past time to let it all go. “So am I hearing this right?” He chuckled, trying to lighten things up. “It’s my fault you’re attracted to me?”

“I didn’t say that.”

He continued smiling.

“I’m trying to be honest, here, Jesse. I’m trying to tell you I’m sorry for holding my own past against you.”

Oddly enough, her admissions only served to make her even more attractive to him. Bad girls were sexy. Bad girls masquerading as good girls were damned near irresistible. He was going to have to watch his Ps and Qs even more now. “Apology accepted, Sarah.”

“Can we start over?”

“Hmm. I’m not sure about that. I have a feeling there’s already too much water over the dam between the two of us for that to work.”

“We can try. There’s no harm in that, is there?”

Starting over. Sounded harmless enough. So why did it feel as if this change in their relationship didn’t bode well for him?

“You never know,” she said, raising her dark eyebrows. “We might even become friends.”

Now that, he knew, was never going to happen. Sarah’s friendship was the last thing he wanted from her, but things between them probably did need to change. “Okay, sure. Let’s start over.” He held out his hand. “Jesse Taylor.”

“Sarah Marshik.” She grinned as she shook his hand. “Pleased to meet you.”

In that moment, he knew. He should’ve never come to Mirabelle.

T
HERE WAS A REASON
Sarah planned happy things like weddings. She hated funerals, even more than thunderstorms, and chose a seat near the rear of Mirabelle’s small church. About a week had passed since she’d heard the news through Garrett of Jean Andersen’s death. Apparently, Jean and John’s daughter, Grace, a model who lived in L.A. and Mirabelle’s biggest
celebrity, hadn’t been able to make it to the island any sooner for a more timely service. The rumor-mill speculation, never particularly kind to begin with, was that the daughter had refused to miss some big fashion show in Paris. It made more sense to Sarah that it had taken a while to make preparations, considering Jean had died in Arizona.

In any case, the delay had given relatives and friends a chance to travel from far and wide to Mirabelle. Arlo and Lynn Duffy, as well as Jan and Ron Setterberg, both snowbird couples, had returned to pay their respects. Before retiring, the Duffys had owned both Duffy’s Pub and Mirabelle Stable and Livery. Although the Setterbergs were also retired, they still owned the building from which Sarah rented both her flower shop and apartment. Despite the circumstances, it was nice to see both couples midwinter.

Not long after Sarah had arrived at the church, Hannah came to the door. She spotted Sarah and made a beeline for the seat next to her. Missy and Jonas came in and sat beside Hannah. Much to Sarah’s surprise, Jesse appeared next in the doorway.

“What’s he doing here?” Hannah said.

“He knows Carl,” Missy whispered. “I think it’s nice that he came.”

Jesse headed toward the outside of a pew on the other side of the church. He nodded at Jan and Ron Setterberg, who were already sitting toward the middle of that same pew, and sat down. Jan said something to Ron. He shook his head, but then Jan got up and moved to the other side of the aisle. Ron sighed and followed.

“Ouch,” Hannah whispered. “But then Jesse’s probably used to that kind of cold shoulder.”

No one ever got used to that kind of obvious scorn.

Jesse, clearly aware of what had just happened, looked down for a moment, as if to gather himself, and then kept his gaze focused toward the center of the church as if he hadn’t noticed Jan’s rudeness. Sarah might’ve expected that kind of reaction from Jan, but Ron acquiescing to Jan’s judgmental behavior surprised her.

A few moments later, Shirley Gilbert came down the center aisle, was about to move into Jesse’s pew until she saw him and kept moving on to the next open seat. No surprise in the reaction toward Jesse that time, either.

Sarah was about to get up and go sit by him when Garrett and Erica entered the church. They saw Jesse and immediately joined him. Sarah took a deep breath and relaxed, but she couldn’t help feeling a little more compassion for Jesse. Possibly even respect. He could’ve gone to a town where no one was aware of his past. Instead, he’d come to little Mirabelle, where everyone knew everything about everybody and faced outright censure.

Sarah glanced back at the door and saw Sean coming into the church. He went up to Carl and Carol, who were standing in the entryway with their two kids, Nikki and Alex, and gave them both hugs. They talked for a few moments and then Sean took a seat next to Erica.

Little by little the tiny church filled to capacity. People were standing in the rear and along the wall. Not long after Jesse gave up his seat for Delores Kowalski to stand in the aisle, the organist began playing somber funeral music and the family walked in to be seated at the front of the church.

John came in first with Carl on one side and Carol on the other. She’d read in the obituary that John and Jean had been married for more than forty years, so there was no surprise he didn’t look as if he was handling the loss well.

Carl and Carol looked only marginally better. Sarah didn’t know Carol well, but she knew Carl both personally and in her business dealings. Most of the weddings she planned were held at the Mirabelle Island Inn, but occasionally a bride and groom opted for the more rustic setting of the Rock Pointe Lodge. Carl, and sometimes both Carl and Carol, came to Duffy’s for happy hour.