Authors: Natasja Hellenthal
The shocked pale
queen shook her head slowly; her face still so friendly and understanding, although stunned; Tirsa almost could not bare it.
‘I am sorry I was not honest with you about my desire for freedom to run away, but I am now
,’ she tried to explain. ‘You have to believe me. There
is
a curse, Tirsa. Moreover, this escaping thing of mine was never a real plan; it was nothing more than a crazy idea; a desire if you like from a confused frustrated mind, no more than that. I have been desperate, so very desperate. I am telling you the absolute truth. You have to believe me, trust me, like I trusted you.’
Tirsa glanced at Shanta
, who was still dancing in and around the waterfall.
‘She must have told us part
ly truths and partly desires; like she said she would. She did not lie, Tirsa, even though she made it look like it was the truth, all of it. We had to guess and she might have interpreted a few things along the way; the worse thing a Truthteller can do. Doing this she set us up against one another and I don’t know why; but I have to admit it was cleverly done. There is a big difference between a dream, a desire so to speak, and actually acting upon it, pursuing it.’ She got up, ignoring Tirsa and her knife, and walked towards the Woodchild.
‘Shanta, can I have a word with you?’
‘It worked, it really worked!’ she cried beyond happiness, all wet and her green skin shiny. A soft breeze caught her wet hair, flicking it across her face.
‘And I am happy for you
, Shanta; you said you would be more than grateful, so please listen to me!’
The girl stopped moving and stepped towards her
, smiling broadly, her wet blue hair clenched to her green scalp. ‘Sorry, I got carried away. What is it?’
‘You have to be honest with us, you owe us this much; what did you see; our past or present desires or what we actually were going to do?’ Tirsa stepped forward, eave
sdropping on the conversation.
The girl got a little annoyed and shook her shoulders lightly, avoiding her eyes. ‘I told everything, I am sorry. I am a Truthteller and told not only the desires, but the rest as well.’
‘The rest?’
‘Yes, you know, all of that was inside you or has been; dreams and desires, hopes and reality.’
‘In the past, right; however, you forgot to mention which of it were the dreams and which was reality. It upset us both, so perhaps you can still tell us correctly, instead of half-truths. You do owe us this much.’
Shanta shook her head, avoiding the
queen’s eyes. ‘I cannot, not now, it took me already so much energy and–’
‘But you could jump up and down
, and sing and yell just now!’ Tirsa called out upset. Shanta stepped back to the waterfall and kneeled, cupped her hands and scooped her hands with fresh, clear, cool ice-cold water. ‘Want some?’ she said through big gulps.
‘No, Shanta. You know what I want.’
‘What is said is said, I cannot change that.’ She stood, smiling. ‘Thank you for your help, both of you,’ and she also looked over the queen’s shoulders towards a mocking Tirsa, and before the queen realized it she stepped through the waterfall and disappeared.
‘Wait a minute!’ she shouted, but her voice could not reach the same level of the roaring rushing water.
‘Damn you!’ and Artride kicked with one foot angrily at the water and a wave splashed up, leaving her upper right leg, and the dirty black breeches and boots, wet and cold. She sighed and waited a moment before going back to her companion.
‘Did you hear what she said, Tirsa?’
‘Yes, I did and I believe her, she has mixed up everything,’ she said grimly. ‘But I keep thinking about what you said earlier; that she could be lured by the sorceress and ordered to do this; making her own version of it all fed by our past desires. When she didn’t find what she wanted she started telling truths as well, making up her own interpretation of it all, so she would get her waterfall back. I do think the sorceress froze it and perhaps promised to defrost it if we or other humans went along with helping her. Like her … we are victims. If she is able to kidnap Woodchildren, she might be able to make them do this much.’
Tirsa stared at the knife with its pure
, almost, white iron blade and in a flare of rage she threw it at the waterfall.
‘I can see it clearly now; we have been tricked,’ she softly said. ‘Maybe by Shanta, but more likely by the sorceress. This is
, after all, her domain, and why would she let Shanta have her little valley, other than have her promise to lure whoever comes here?’ and she bit her lower lip, still avoiding the queen’s eyes. ‘I believe she did this to set us up; to make us hate each other perhaps, but either way she knows us better now. That is her advantage. Knowledge is power. She can somehow make use of that when we near her home, that much is true.’
Artride sat down beside her on a broad rock at the pool
, and sighed, distressed.
They were silent for a while before Tirsa asked
in a serious tone, ‘Can you forgive me?’
‘I already have. I almost believed what she said about you as well.’
‘I could never kill you, even if I did want to.’
‘You wanted to before?’ she curiously asked.
‘Only before I met you, yes. I reckon that it was my past desire. I thought it would solve my problems, as I always believed killing would. It was just a thought, never a plan, you have to believe me on that. Things have changed. I should have been wiser. I am sorry.’
‘And I am sorry for the weak fool I have been. However, I do not have this feeling of wanting to leave it all behind anymore.
That has passed too. I will fight the bastards. Never let them win again!’
‘
I should have listened to you and left this valley at once. I should have known not to trust anyone here.’
‘Well, I went along with it. We just made the wrong choice
,’ Artride said calmly.
‘But still, I guess it’s because I thought I knew Woodchildren. For a stupid moment I forgot we are in Dochas.’ She rubbed her forehead.
‘Do not forget it again, Tirsa, we have to be alert, avoid any contact from now on.’
‘But we still don’t know where the sorceress lives. How will we know w
here to look if we cannot ask for aid?’
Artride shook her weary head and pulled off her boots. ‘I have a feeling we do not have to worry about that. If she does all the effort in slowing us down, teasing us and getting to know us
, perhaps through her little Woodchildren guards, or whatever they are to her, instead of making us turn back or kill us, she must somehow want us to come closer. Do not forget that we are the first in decades, maybe longer, that advantage have gotten us this far.’
‘So, we will just have to wait for a next challenge or sign that we are getting closer to her?’
‘Precisely.’
‘But what if her whole domain is full of wards? We might as well be heading in the wrong direction. I do not think this was so threateningly dangerous. We were still able to think clearly, however confusing it was. I should think the more dangerous it is, the closer we get.’
‘If we were about to kill each other just now, what will be next?’
Tirsa glanced up at her, upset, but saw she was smiling and quickly
turned her head; relieved she was not serious.
‘We will just have to search the entire country for her and we will have to do it fast to be in time.’
Tirsa nodded at that, her brother was never far off her mind, and watched the queen walk towards the inviting pool and undressing herself. ‘Time for a bath first, don’t you think?’
CHAPTER
12
Memories, never dying; only fade
In time…
Feelings, however never fade
To the heart time does not exist, never has and never will
To the heart it is clear what it has lost
She found out that next to the cool pond there was a small deep hot water source, bubbling, sizzling and steaming.
‘You should try this, it’s warm!’ she called out while she tried the water with one foot first. She judged it to be just fine and let herself slide in. The hot, pure liquid closed around and welcomed her. It was just bearable; not too hot, but enough to let the dirt soak off her body and thaw her out.
‘You have a bath first; I will wait and guard the place,’ she heard Tirsa call from behind the bushes.
‘Alright.’
‘Just shout if you notice anything unusual!’
‘Life is about taking risks,’ Artride mumbled, trying to clear her mind, while the water already did so much without any effort from her. She lay back in the bath, relishing the warmth within and without, letting her mind drift where it would.
It is like a treat, this little paradise. I could stay here a while…
but she caught herself and angrily shook her head thinking about the recent events.
No, I will not forget about my task! I will enjoy this as long as it lasts, but then I will continue my mission… soon.
Tirsa stayed at the waterfall, she already had examined the rocks beyond it; there was no exit or cave so she did not understand where Shanta could have gone to. She did not know Woodchildren could make themselves invisible or vanish into thin air.
If I just knew some magic –
and she thought about the countless times she had asked her Woodchildren friends back home to teach her some tricks, but they always kindly refused. They had knowledge of ancient secret magic and it had to remain among the old TalamhClann alone. She had respected that, and had felt like an outsider again; but stayed curious and just enjoyed watching them when they were at work doing their magic. For she was allowed to observe, and she had travelled safely because of their protective spells. She wished she could have borrowed some of their spells for this journey, but then reckoned they would have been of no use anyhow, if they could not use magic on Sempervirens, or anywhere here in Dochas, if the TalamhClann couldn’t either.
Those visits to them stood out in her memory. She missed them greatly and felt sick when she thought about all of the Wind-and Woodchildren in Dochas who were missing; leaving their loved ones in the dark, never knowing what happened to them
, or if they were even alive. If she was just able to help them somehow …
A familiar sound brought her out of her memories; the voice of the
queen.
Quickly, instinctively alarmed
, as if it had already grown into a second nature of hers, she jumped to her feet and started walking towards the pool. There she noticed Artride had wrapped herself in her blanket, obviously naked underneath. Her long hair was wet and her skin a little red from the heat and soaking too long, but clean. Walking in a relaxed manner towards her on the grass she said, ‘I really needed that. Now it’s your turn while I take watch. After you have bathed, I suggest we wash our clothes in the hot spring. No soap, but it will have to do.’
Tirsa felt a little embarrassed about the situation and nodded
, looking away, leaving the queen in a grassy meadow where she perched down in the gentle sunshine.
When she was undressed herself, sitting in the hot spring, she soon became peaceful as well
, and found out just like Artride that the warmth and soft bubbling of the water was clearing her thoughts, and she felt a desire to stay a bit longer in this paradise.
Did Artride feel the same?
She came to the conclusion that if she had, she must have felt reluctant to tell.
Especially now that Tirsa knew her desire to stay. Artride probably thought Tirsa would be only more disappointed if she found out her weakness, or maybe she reckoned Tirsa wouldn’t feel the same desire to stay, because she was stronger and had more willpower.
Well, I am not, for I do feel it.
She only missed the soap
, and had hesitated to try some leaves of the strange plants that grew here that could contain soap ingredients, but thought it safer not to try them out. Apart from that, the bath was perfect and still very alluring and tempting her to stay.
Perhaps it is magic, but I am not falling into its trap.
When she came back, she found Artride
fast asleep on her back on the meadow, with her blanket a little blown away by the soft summer breeze; exposing her long bare legs and delicate arms. A part of her uncovered round hip and breasts looked almost white as if never touched by the sun, whilst Tirsa’s skin was used to days of being exposed to the giant hot star, and even still wore its tan from last summer, which already started to darken under the spring sun. Tirsa felt a warmth starting around her heart, flowing through the rest of her body.
She decided to occupy her mind and wash their clothes.
Good, at least I do not have to be embarrassed by doing this in the nude!
Strangely, she found herself back in the woodland and mountains of her youth; where in the summertime she was usually naked or poorly dressed, and even grew used to the temperature when autumn came. Her mother begged her to cover herself up when she turned sixteen and changed from a lithe boyish girl into a slim pretty woman. Her mother feared for her safety, knowing that if a traveller ever saw her like that he would surely try to ravage her.
Tirsa smiled when she thought about her mother in those days, and thinking about how naive and careless she indeed had been; not understanding fully yet what her mother meant. However
, always respecting her and knowing it had to be wrong; for her mother had frightened her. Tirsa never had forgotten the evil men who killed her father and were it not for her kind patient good father, she would have believed all men were evil. Her mother, indeed, had proven to be wise, when one day riders came along the woods when she was swimming naked in her lake.
I was very fortunate they meant no harm.
Her smile faded. How little I knew back then about the world and human nature; good and evil and the shadows that lie in between
…
She pulled their soaked breeches out of the water and rubbed the cloth together
repeatedly,and firmly at a smooth rock. She rinsed all of the clothes: the breeches and the tunics in the cool water of the pool until the stains and dirt was gone.
When she came back, Artride was still asleep and she dropped and spread the clothes to dry on the sunny meadow. She had to lie down too, enjoying the warmth of the sun and the soft breeze on her naked body. The grass was high enough to cover them, but she refused to sleep, even if she was exhausted. It was still midday, but Tirsa decided that if the
queen did not wake before evening she would not rouse her either. They could camp here and Tirsa would stay on guard until her queen awoke, so that perhaps she could catch some sleep a few hours herself.
The hours pas
sed by and the sun sank behind the mountains. She had drank some of the sweet, nourishing nectar and had put on her clothes that had dried fast in the warm wind. She felt better now that she and her clothes were clean. Despite the shield of protection she had constructed around her emotions, she was having considerable difficulty remaining aloof from the sheer excitement of this venture together with the queen. She fought against those confusing feelings and tried hard not to stare at her on the grass.
Artride had moved underneath her blanket and now lay on her side with her face on her stretched arm; her long black hair all dried and wavy. It looked like she did not have a care in the world.
If I could make it so, for her, I would. She certainly deserves it.
She had not washed her own blanket
, afraid it would not dry in time; fearing the chill of the night.
When Artride fina
lly woke it was almost night, and Tirsa was happy she could get her rest at last.
‘You should have woken me up, Tirsa, really!’
she exclaimed.
‘No, you needed it, obviously.’ She yawned and rolled herself in her woollen blanket. Within moments, she was sleeping a dreamless
, deep sleep. ‘Wake me up before dawn, please. We have to get going again,’ she had managed to say before slumbering off.
How could I have ever believed that she would kill me?
Artride saw the washed clothes, and smiled at the glass with nectar ready for her. It was dusk and a bird was singing a sweet melody to announce the upcoming night. She did not need to make a fire for the temperature around her was comfortable, and she felt better and ready for the journey ahead, especially after the sweet juice giving her new strength.
The
queen was alone with her thoughts, but felt a little disorientated for sleeping a great deal during daytime. However, she was wide-awake and thought about the recent days and happenings, looking up at the appearing stars. She inhaled the rich night air deeply and felt fit. She knew she should not enjoy this quest really, but realised she did to some degree. Apart from the encounter with her uncle, and Tirsa dying, and the trip through the swamp and through the icy mountains, it felt kind of good in itself to travel again; but most of all she enjoyed the refreshing company of wild Tirsa Lathabris. Now that things were straightened out, she was sure they could be friends when this mission was completely over, and hoped Tirsa would not distance herself from her.
She might with all the knowledge she now possesses.
Nevertheless, she realis
ed all too clearly that she could not return without a spell and survive herself; she had killed her uncle and would face the death penalty. The life of a queen was worth nothing compared to that of a king. Her father had warned her about the strict rules for women. She would be beheaded and her head would be hung on the branches of the Royal Tree as a reminder to the women of Ceartas that murder was a major crime; even if it was in self-defence; and also to show that men were their masters, even for a queen leading Ceartas. Plenty of women wanted to leave their suffocating marriages, but faced the harsh truth that divorce was not allowed for them and murder was not an option either. They had to endure it all; his presence, the abuse, the hard work in the house and on the land, the bearing of babies, nursing and raising children. And in the meantime wither away or simply die after taking their ill husbands lives in despair. Death was sometimes the only solution. In the old days, these things happened more frequently than today. Women tried to teach their sons to be better men than their fathers, especially towards women. In these days, women married quite late, only when they were sure they had found a suitable match; sometimes that would even be a younger man. Men on the other hand did not have to worry about any of these things. For them divorce was indeed an option; however, killing their wives also for them meant the penalty of death, but that rarely happened.
Tirsa knows I cannot go back without a spell; perhaps that is why she feared I
would truly stay here to save my own skin. I do not blame her.
Despite everything,
Artride still felt some responsibility for her people and the urge to change the situation in her country, and she knew she could make a change, if she was persistent enough, and if this sorceress was willing to help them. However nothing indicated so far that she would, they had to try at any cost to convince her.
Therefore, I had better enjoy this journey, for it will most likely be my last
.
~ ~ ~
After she had woken Tirsa up early in the morning to get going, Artride decided not to keep any more secrets from her. She desperately needed a friend with whom she could talk things through. Not a Jaromir or another guard with his brain in his pants.
It has been so long
since I could trust someone; someone who does not want anything done from me.
She thought about Ezra, the head of the kitchen who once had been her personal maid. They had established an intense friendship and a deep trust over the years, that Artride did not think she could ever share with someone else. Things were not the same anymore between them; however, Ezra never told anything to anyone about what had happened privately between them. Still, she had distanced herself from Artride, and avoided contact lately. Artride respected that, but felt even more lonely and isolated after their break.
She glanced at Tirsa
, who was drinking the nectar with her eyes closed, and thought about telling her.
Just to see how she reacts. No more secrets.
However, she knew it was more than that.
Tirsa felt her staring and glanced back, returning her smile. There was some sort of stirring in the air.
‘It is a shame we do not have those delicious breads and cookies anymore. I really do miss them,’ Artride said while combing her long hair before braiding it into one braid again.
Tirsa nodded and licked her lips. ‘But this fills the stomach just as well.’ And she made sure to fill their water bags with the delicious nourishing nectar.