Authors: Donna Kauffman
“So he’s moving people about time at Chamberlain’s
whim for no reason but that it amuses him?” Archer snorted. “I find that hard to believe.”
Baleweg looked to him. “It is difficult for someone like yourself, a man with long-held goals who is willing to work hard to achieve them, to understand the motivations of someone for whom obtaining things, material things, comes easily. When that is the case, goals shift. Security is not an issue and defeating boredom becomes the only challenge. When you have powers as strongly defined as Emrys’s, your choice of entertainment can take on dire, even deadly, consequences. Especially for those with whom he chooses to play. Which, I imagine, is what draws him to the game in the first place. That and poking and prodding at me whenever the chance arises. This game with Chamberlain allows him to do both. He’d like nothing more than to draw me into this. He’s never understood or accepted my chosen path of continued study. And I assure you he cares nothing about who gets hurt in the process.”
Talia’s throat tightened as the true consequences of her role in this sunk in. If she couldn’t help the queen, far more was at stake than political chaos. “So if I fail … and the queen dies—”
Baleweg looked sharply at her. “You will have done what you can do. Fate will out. But you must see this through. I had hoped for more time, for us to make more tangible progress, but we must head back as soon as possible. If you remain here, you will be hunted. Anywhere you go, in this time or any other, you will be hunted, until the matter of the crown is dealt with. We must try to do what we can for Catriona. I believe this is what you mother would have wanted.”
“What about Emrys?” Archer asked. “When the queen’s fate is resolved, what will he do then?”
“That I cannot answer. But I will do what I must
when the time comes. Our first concern must be the queen’s health. As to that, Talia should not be at court without someone whose interests are the same as my own. Make no mistake,” he said, his voice quavering with emotion now, “I am not doing this for queen and kingdom. I am doing this because of a promise I made to a young woman who made a place for herself in my heart. I have honored Eleri’s wishes, but now I must do what I can to protect her daughter, all that is left of her. The one to protect her must place her interests first, beyond those of the queen and court, beyond even his own.” He turned and looked deeply into Archer’s eyes. Even Talia shivered at the intensity. “I trust that you are the one who will fulfill this role.”
Talia’s first thought was that she didn’t want anyone else’s life placed in jeopardy, but she was stilled into silence by the look in his eyes.
I won’t let anything happen to you, Talia. Not if I can help it
. The words he’d blurted out to her in the park earlier echoed through her.
He spoke to Baleweg, but his gaze continued to rest squarely on hers and she knew he was thinking about them, too. “You have nothing to fear on that quarter,” he said, then turned and faced Baleweg. “I say we move swiftly. Tonight if possible.”
Baleweg shook his head. “Despite the problems and threats facing us, patience in this matter is key. It is not so easy as dashing off.” He stepped closer to her. “Talia, I think it best if you do what is necessary to square things away with your animals and their potential owners. Then explain to your employees that you will be making a short trip.”
“Short?” Her voice was a croak.
“Whatever happens after your arrival will likely
happen quickly. Then it will be up to you to do what you wish from that point forward.”
“Can’t I return back here before I ever left?”
“No, it doesn’t work that way. What time you spend in the future will also be spent here. I can only move you forward within the span of your natural life, never back.”
She nodded as if she understood, when in fact she was totally overwhelmed. “When do we leave?”
“Soon.” Baleweg shifted his attention back to Archer. “Until I am ready, I trust you will keep her safe, Devin. Stay close to her at all times.” Then he looked down to Ringer, sitting obediently at his feet, and slapped at his robes. “Come, young soldier. Let us find something to eat.”
Talia looked at Archer, but he was frowning at the retreating pair. “What next?” Her voice was rough, her throat still tight and achy from what had transpired between them. What
had
transpired between them?
She turned to find herself under Archer’s steady regard. “I need to know something,” he said quietly.
Surprised by his intensity, she said, “What?”
“What happened that day?” he asked abruptly. “The first day I almost kissed you, you jumped back as though something had bitten you. Can to tell me what happened?”
He’d taken her completely off guard. She’d supposed she’d known this was going to come out sooner or later. She’d been half-afraid Baleweg would tell him, but he’d honored her request not to. For what good it did her now. She rubbed at her arms, wanting to step back, put more space between them, but she could not. Did not. “Why?”
“I’ve wondered about it. A lot. I need to know.”
Talia would have liked to evade this whole issue
any way she could. But she kept seeing the way he’d looked at her when he said he’d protect her. She owed him this, at the very least. “Well. Um. You know my empathic skills are limited to animals, right?” He didn’t nod, he simply continued to stare at her. She cleared her throat. “Yes, well, Baleweg was teaching me how to try and connect with any mind, any feelings.” She looked away for a moment, suddenly feeling wretched for what she’d done, even if it hadn’t been intentional. It had been an invasion she’d had no right to make. “He was convinced my talent lay beyond the more simplistic animal mind. That maybe connecting with, you know … another person … would help me unlock my other supposed gifts.”
“So you tried your skills on me?”
Now she did step back, but he caught at her arm. His touch was all the more alarming for its gentleness. “I—I didn’t mean to. You were looking so intently at me, and it just happened. One second I was in my own skin, feeling my own … feelings, then like a thunderbolt I—” She faltered badly, but knew she had to finish, to confess. “I felt you. Felt … everything. Everything you felt. Even some things I didn’t understand. I was so shocked I pulled back almost the moment I made the connection.” She had no idea what he was thinking now. “I’m sorry.”
“Then you ran.”
“I didn’t run, not exactly. I just thought—”
“Did it scare you, Talia? What I was feeling? Whatever other things inside me you connected with?”
Her mind was racing in a hundred directions. “I’ve never done it again. I swear.”
“You didn’t answer me. Did it scare you?”
“It surprised me. I didn’t think … really didn’t
imagine …” She looked down, gathered her courage, then looked back at him, almost defiantly. “Okay, it did scare me. A little. Okay, not a little. A lot.”
“Because you could do it?”
She shook her head. “Oddly, that was more a relief. As if I had always known it. I felt, I don’t know. Proud, I guess.”
“So what scared you?”
She held his gaze. “That I was making you feel the same things you were making me feel. That there was something else inside you I connected with. I don’t know, I can’t explain it even to myself.”
The light leapt into a flame. “Were you so surprised that a man might feel passion for you?”
“No. I’ve experienced passion before, Archer. I was just surprised I could make
you
feel that way. The deeper connection I felt … well, it went both ways.”
He started to say something, then stopped.
“What? Now I’ve surprised you?” She smiled dryly. “Well, that’s good, then. I shouldn’t be the only one having her world turned upside down.”
He muttered something that she couldn’t quite catch.
“Shouldn’t we be talking about the queen and her court?”
“You do surprise me, Talia,” he said finally. “One moment shy, the next bold. I never know what to expect with you. Perhaps that’s why I find myself unable to stop thinking about you.” He stepped closer and her breath caught in her chest at the look in his eyes. “And that scares me,” he said quietly. He moved closer still, until she had to tip her head back in order to maintain eye contact. “And if you were smart, it would scare you, too.”
He lowered his mouth to hers, pausing just long
enough to whisper in her ear. “No fair peeking inside my head. If you want to know what I’m feeling, just ask me. I’ll show you.”
“Right now I’ve got all I can handle feeling my own feelings, thanks,” she said faintly.
He laughed against her mouth. “Good. Then feel this.”
A
rcher only meant to indulge in his need to taste her before everything changed. He quickly realized he could not control his feelings, just as he realized he didn’t give a damn. Not this one last time. He shut out Baleweg’s dire warnings and predictions and did what he wanted, took what he wanted.
Gave her what
she
wanted.
He would stop, in just one more second. But right at that moment, she was making that soft moaning noise deep in her throat and he swore he felt every vibration of it throughout his entire body. He pulled her closer, groaning in satisfaction when she dug her long fingers into his hair. His hips found hers and his knees actually buckled slightly when she moved against him.
He gripped her tightly and made sure she understood exactly what she was moving toward.
“Archer—”
“Devin,” he corrected. For whatever reason, he had a need to set this moment apart from every moment he’d ever shared with anyone else.
“Devin.”
Damn, but just hearing her say it pushed him right to the edge. “I want more.”
“So do I, but—”
He pulled her hard against him. “Sweet Christ, Talia, you have me inside out.”
“I want you, too.” She looked up at him. “What do we do with this, Devin? There is so much ahead of us, we can’t … really shouldn’t—”
“Must,” he said, then his mouth was on hers again and she gave herself to him so sweetly, so gloriously, he was already planning where to take her when suddenly she managed to yank herself free.
“I can’t think clearly like this.” She looked at him, her hair dancing about her head in the night breeze like a wild fairy halo.
He felt empty with her gone from his arms. Surely if they’d take each other this aching need would dissipate, or at the very least become manageable enough that he could think straight again. “Then let’s get this out of our systems. Perhaps we’ll both be able to think more clearly then.”
She looked away and he actually felt his heart catch a bit. There couldn’t be more in this for her than he’d assumed, could there?
No more than there is in this for you
, his inner voice mocked him.
She looked back to him. “Baleweg is inside. I don’t know where else we can go.” She said it calmly, evenly, as if it were merely a physical matter, reducing their needs to animal lust, something a good rutting would take care of.
And suddenly he despised himself for making her admit she was willing to take that if it was all he had to offer. But hadn’t that been exactly what attracted him to her? That she wanted the same thing, nothing more? So why did he suddenly want to create a bower for her, something filled with rose petals and feather down or some romantic shit like that? Jesus, this was getting way too complicated.
And yet he looked at her standing there, wanting him badly enough to take what little he offered, and
his need for her almost drove him to his knees. He was willing to give her whatever it took to satisfy her. To make her smile up at him. To see the satisfied look in her eyes and know he’d been the one to put it there.
Goddamn, but his head hurt.
“We can’t do this,” he muttered.
“What?” She looked at him as if he’d lost his mind. And maybe he had. Because he was actually thinking about doing what he should have done ten minutes ago. Walk away, leave her be. Not … complicating everything. Despite the fact that they both wanted to complicate things so badly that the air all but pulsed with it.
She stepped close to him and he wasn’t sure whether to laugh at the fierce determination in her eyes, or rip his hair out because he’d already decided that they couldn’t do this. For both their sakes.
“What do you mean we can’t do this?”
“We just shouldn’t,” he said, hating himself. “As you said, this will only complicate things. It’s not because I don’t want you. God knows I’m so hard with wanting you I can barely stand upright.”
Her eyes widened and her throat worked and he almost caved in. Having a conscience was a pain in the ass. Probably why he’d never worked too hard on developing one. And hadn’t he picked a fine time to start?
“If you think I’m going to go attaching all sorts of emotional obligations to this, you’re wrong,” she said.
Wasn’t that what he wanted to hear? So why did it piss him off? “I think we need to focus on what lies ahead for you and not our raging hormones.”
“Didn’t you tell me that if we finished what we’d started, we could concentrate better? ‘Get this out of our systems,’ was how you put it.”
He winced. Hearing the words tossed back at him only reinforced his decision. “Which is exactly why we can’t do this.”
She rubbed her temples. “Okay, I’m confused. I agree with you. No worries. So what’s the big deal?”
Now she was really pissing him off. Because she was lying. She wanted more, just as he did.
Whoa, slow down there, mate
.
“Fine then. Just damn fine,” he said abruptly. Hell, he’d tried, hadn’t he? He was no saint and had been a fool to pretend to be one. “If that’s all it’s to be, then why not, right?” His tone was a tad sharper than he meant it to be, but what the hell, right? “Why I was so worried about your delicate sensibilities when you seem to have none, I have no idea.” She backed away, but her eyes were riveted to his and, dammit, it wasn’t for fear of him he saw, it was anticipation of what he might do to her.
Damn her to hell. She’d well and truly done it.